Chapter 16
He came upon them in the marshy clearing. Zarabeth was on her back in the ankle deep water. Screaming and struggling against Zar. Struggling against her mother, who for all intents and purposes, seemed to be trying to drown her child.
The rage clicked on inside him. He practically heard the sound of the switch being flipped. Since Zar's return, he wondered occasionally that if push came to shove and he had to decide between his daughter and her mother, who would he pick. The fury pouring through his body gave him the answer.
He understood that Zar could not help who she was, what she was. But the cold hard truth was that she was no longer the woman he once loved more than life itself. Their past relationship would always have a deep hold on him, but it would not stand between him and the love he had for their daughter. He would not let Zarabeth be the sacrificial lamb of her mothers madness. The fiery breath of the serpent, that which was a person under the influence of Profearaben, would not scorch his daughter.
Zar was on her knees next to the fighting child. She had grabbed Zarabeth's legs and was trying to raise them in order to force the small head back and therefore under the water. Between Zarabeth's struggles and the slipperiness of the grimy water, Zar was having a hard time getting a sure enough grip.
Richard had no such problem with traction when he grabbed Zar by the throat from behind. His grip was secure and crushing. He raised her body from Zarabeth's, feeling the muscles and cartilage in her throat begin to rip under his intractable grasp.
A small part inside of him wondered how he could do this to the woman who had shown him a world he had never dreamed existed. A woman who had not only saved his life, but his very soul. Who had made him the man capable of raising their daughter. But the rage had taken him over. And the small voice that was his heart breaking bowed under the pressure of fear for his child's life.
He might have choked her until her blood ran through his fingers if Zarabeth hadn't let loose another scream of pain. Instead he tossed Zar across the swamp. Not even watching to see her limp body land half-in, half-out of the water.
"God, no! Riddick what are you doing?!" Audrey had arrived just in time to see him throw Zar. Her anguished shout lost on him as he knelt next to Zarabeth.
The child was still crying and writhing. "It's okay Zarabeth, she's gone. I won't let her hurt you." But his words were obviously not getting through to the terrified child. Audrey, still torn on whether to see to Zar or the little girl, finally knelt next to Zarabeth. The very ferocity of the child's screams and struggling letting her know that there was something more going on here than a potential drowning.
She saw the blood in the water a split second before Richard tried to pick up Zarabeth. "No! Don't pick..." But she was too late. He tried to pick up the toddler to hold and comfort her. Instead she let out a piercing shriek as he tried to raise her from the water. He couldn't seem to bring her body any closer to his.
"Riddick stop! She's caught in a trap!" Many farmers used the contraptions to catch crop destroying animals. A swamp was an unusual place for one, but maybe an animal had dragged one in as it tried to escape.
With a strength she didn't know she had, Audrey ripped the little girl from her father's arms and put her back into the water. She had fainted from the pain and was lying unresisting in Audrey's arms.
Richard felt his heart stop. He had survived many things, his self-survival instinct honed to fine degree. A beast within him that made him live even when he didn't want to. But he wasn't sure if he could survive losing Zarabeth. In the brackish water quickly streaking with blood, she looked so small, so pale, so...dead.
Then it hit him. Zar hadn't been trying to kill Zarabeth, she'd been trying to save her! He'd crushed her throat...killed the woman he once loved...and she'd only been trying...
Painfully grabbing his arm, Audrey shouted "Riddick! Did you hear me?! We need to get her out of the trap and back to the farm!" She had only seen the dazed, helpless look on Riddick's face once before. On Polaris Station when he thought Elson Brenner had choked Zar to death. Zarabeth was hurt too badly for Audrey to think about the irony of the current situation.
Whether it was her shout or her touch, she succeeded in awakening him from his shock. Reaching down he felt under the water at Zarabeth's feet. With her unconscious and not struggling, finding the trap was easy. The little girls feet slipped free when he hit the release mechanism.
Her ankles were two swollen mounds of butchered flesh. But he didn't see any bone sticking up, so hopefully...
As he gathered the most precious thing in his life up in his arms he prayed to a God he didn't much have use for. LET HER LIVE, TAKE HER FEET IF YOU HAVE TO, BUT PLEASE...PLEASE!...DON'T TAKE HER AWAY FROM ME.
Rising to his feet he turned towards the farm.
Audrey looked back to where Zar had landed. "What about Zar?"
No answer came from Richard's fast retreating back.
"Riddick! What about Zar?! We can't just leave her like this! She needs help!"
If Audrey could've seen Richard face she would've fallen to her knees in painful sympathy. There were tears streaking down his face though he didn't feel them. And damned if he would've known if they were for his daughter or her mother. All he knew is that he'd made one too many terrible mistakes.
There would be no redemption from this heinous act. There would be no Zar to take the ugliness away. To make him clean again. What kind of man killed without making sure he was interpreting the facts correctly? What kind of man killed a woman who he'd laughed with, fought with, made love with, been reborn in?
The answer whispered through his mind...a man who never belonged with the human race. A man who never learned that he didn't belong anywhere...period.
As he hurried away from the swamp he felt the old Riddick laugh inside his head.
TOLD YA!
The practical side of him made him answer Audrey, "Leave her. She's dead. Zarabeth needs taken care of." The voice coming out of his mouth was calm. While inside the winds of hell were turning his heart into charred rock. He would think about Zar later. After he was sure his child was going to be okay.
Audrey had been horrified at seeing Riddick throw Zar across the swamp. Never a friendly man he nevertheless had been a much kinder, softer person since she and the rest of the family had come back to him. It was all Zarabeth's doing. She was sure of that. Look what raising Hill had turned her into.
Once a terrified, gawky kid, she had become a fiercely protective mother. If Hill's biological mother, Toni, had tried to come back and kill him, Audrey was sure she would've had no problem in killing Toni first. Even if she later found out that she was wrong in reading Toni's intentions. Still, she never would've believed him capable of killing Zar. She knew him well enough to know that it was eating him alive inside. Not that he would ever show it. That episode of blankness would be the only hint that all was not right in Riddick's soul.
With a longing glance back at Zar, Audrey knew Riddick was right. There was nothing to be done for her friend. Maybe there'd been nothing to do for her since they'd found her. She'd been like the walking dead for four years. She wouldn't have wished for Zar the type of death she'd been given but maybe actual death was the best thing.
Zar's continued distance had been turning Richard back into the Riddick of old. His frustration at not being able to help her making him turn away from the gifts she had bestowed upon him. Audrey guessed he felt a degree of guilt for not being able to 'save' Zar the way Zar had 'saved' him.
Audrey too started crying as she walked away from the body on the edge of the swamp. There was a child to save now. The old Zar would've demanded that her daughter come first. Even if it meant her own death as a result. There'd be time to mourn her, and everything her death meant, later.
When Audrey arrived back at the house she saw that chaos reigned. The door was wide open to the dining room where the floor was littered with food and broken dishes. Stuff hastily cleared off the dining table where Zarabeth now lay motionless. Hill was sobbing hysterically while Imam kept asking Riddick what had happened. Riddick ignored him, intent on surveying the mangled flesh of his daughter ankles.
Moving to the sink area Audrey quickly filled a bowl with water adding disinfectant. Bringing it over to Riddick, along with some clean cloths, she watched while he tenderly cleaned off the blood and muck.
"It's not as bad as I thought. She has some pretty deep cuts but it doesn't look like there's anything broken."
Imam hovered over the top of the table asking "Should I get a doctor?"
As he continued to clean Zarabeth's wounds Richard contemplated the question. The little girls breathing was normal and she was quickly gaining color. Her skin was warm and her pulse fast but steady. Those things, along with the medical equipment he brought to New Concord when first arriving, made him believe there was nothing he couldn't do that a doctor could. He had medical training of his own, courtesy of his time in the ASF. She'd lost blood, but he had a few packs of replicated blood in his supplies. That, along with the Ravi Knitter, should be plenty.
"No...I have everything here we'll need. It's stored in the black container in the barn...under the loft." Glancing at the sobbing Hill he looked back at Imam and said " Why don't you take Hill and get them for me."
Imam scooped up the unprotesting child and hurried out of the room.
Richard kept wiping the slowly oozing blood from the wounds. Relieved almost to the point of weakness to know that Zarabeth wasn't in danger of dying. There'd been enough death that day. The thought reminded him of Zar lying in the swamp. Out of all the ugly, horrible, soul destroying things he'd seen in his life, he doubt he'd ever forget the sight of her body lying in the murky water. Or the feel of her throat crushing under his grip.
Without looking up at Audrey he told her "I'll explain everything to Imam. Once Zarabeth's cleaned and patched up...I'll go see to Zar." Taking a deep breath he raised his eyes to Audrey's . "I'm sorry Jack."
Knowing the use of her nickname showed how close he was to breaking, she couldn't bring herself to reject his apology. Zar's death would hurt all of them but Riddick most of all. To have lost her, then find her, just to lose her again so quickly...
Reaching over she squeezed the hand that was lovingly brushing the wet hair from Zarabeth's face.
"You didn't know. She's been so different since you found her. There was always the air of...I don't know...like she was always on edge. Like there was a possibility of violence if the wrong thing were to happen." Looking down at the little girl on the table she had to admit, "I probably would've done the same thing. If I could've."
Once Imam came back with the medical supplies, along with a much calmer Hill, sewing the cuts and replacing the lost blood took a few hours. Richard was glad Zarabeth was out for most of the time. Only stirring when the blood filling her veins was almost done.
She started crying and fretting almost immediately. He administered a light pain reliever / sedative then gathered her in his arms and started to rock her to sleep. It took a while until finally she succumbed. But he still didn't immediately let her go. The scare of almost losing her making a need in him to feel her alive. But the vision of Zar lying in the swamp kept flashing in his mind, so he finally left Zarabeth to her sleep.
He gave Imam a short version of events. Sparing himself no blame. He expected the holy to give him hell but Imam had just praised Allah that Zarabeth was okay and tried to hug Richard. Only Richard's cold, silvery stare stopping him in his tracks. Imam had seen so much good in the escapee that he sometimes forgot that he lived with a stone cold killer. A man many considered a psychopath. But even the shined eyes of a very inimical man couldn't hide the pain hiding just behind them.
Richard saw the pity in Imam's eyes and knew he didn't deserve it. Zar deserved the pity. The real shame was that she wasn't alive to receive it.
"I'm going to bury Zar. And no, I don't want any help. Keep an eye on Zarabeth. You know where I'll be if you need me. I should only be an hour or so." With those parting words he left the house.
Imam thought he looked like a man with the weight of the world on his very broad shoulders.
Making his way to the swampy clearing, Richard took his time. Girding himself to deal with what he knew he would see on arriving. Zar's body. Dead. Cold. Murdered. There...he said the word. He'd murdered Zar. No matter what his state of mind or motives, it was murder.
Twilight had just settled over the land when he came to the clearing. Taking off his goggles he stepped to the edge of the water. Blinked rapidly several times.
Zar was gone.
Where he had tossed her body was now only an empty depression in the reeds and mud. Walking slowly around to the spot, he went to his haunches. Touched the spot where she'd been. An animal must've smelled death and came for the carrion. Dragged her away. Nature's way of dealing with messes. But there were no drag marks. And the nearest neighbor was a good thirty minute walk away. So that left no option for human intervention.
A thought occurred to him. She had Profearaben running through her veins. Probably had more of it in her than he did.
What if he hadn't killed her?!
What if she had only been seriously wounded and had come to, then dragged herself away to safety, a natural first instinct?
It had been almost eight hours since the attack. He himself would've been well on his way to healing. Zar, with her greater dose of Profearaben, would be even farther along. Maybe even conscious.
Trusting this wasn't his mind giving him false hope so he would stop blaming himself, he stood up and surveyed the darkened area.
His altered vision let him see various living creatures scurrying around the forests edge. All of them much smaller than Zar. He opened his sense of hearing and smell. Taking advantage of the gifts he'd never asked for. Maybe for once they'd be welcome.
Something was in the air, he could taste it on his tongue. But he couldn't quite place it. Was it Zar? Fours years ago he could've located her with his nose blocked, his ears plugged and his eyes blindfolded. Just tasting the air with his tongue for her unique scent would've been enough. But now, with her being altered...
But one thing hadn't changed since she'd come back...the mysterious tandem beating of their hearts. He was so used to it now, after having lost it four years ago, that he didn't even notice that it hadn't left him when he'd thrown her across the swamp.
She WAS alive!
"Zar!"
No answer. She'd been mute since the day he took her from Flowers ship, but even so, he did he really expect a response?! He fucking tried to kill her! Turned her throat to pulp on the inside. She had to be in pain and terrified. Of him. Hell...Flowers hadn't even done this to her.
He moved further into the forest. Scanning the undergrowth for good hiding spots. He came across a small puddle of blood. Probably from her vomiting the blood that had leaked into her stomach from the trauma inflicted on her throat. The added pain must've been horrific.
What had the events done to her state of mind? She'd been somewhat better since coming to live with them. Had the attack sent her back to being a zombie? Was she even now rocking herself silly against some tree? Alone, hurt, terrified?
Frantic he searched the forest around the swamp. Certain she couldn't have run far in her condition. An hour later he was back at the clearing. The trail of blood leading him back to where it had started. She was going in circles. Out of her mind with pain and fear? Or enraged and trying to kill him?
What had he done? What had he fucking done to her?!
Frantic questions bombarded his mind.
Had he pushed her over the edge that she'd teetered on for four long years? Was she now one those animals that the Profearaben turned his fellow soldiers into? Would she try to rampage and kill before self-destructing? Would he now be forced to truly kill her?
The thoughts drove him to his knees in self-loathing. Oblivious to the water and mud soaking through his pants. Grief and regret making him bow his head in hopelessness. He lifted it in a last ditch hope of entreating, for Zar's sanity, the God who saved Zarabeth.
She stood before him.
The Profearaben made her as quiet as him when moving in stealth mode. He hadn't even felt the air move.
His eyes met hers.
Her face was a blank, giving no clue as to her state of mind. Blood ran down one corner of her mouth. It's trail a darker pink on her whitish face. The bruises on her swollen neck interpreted as dark splotches by his eyes. She was wet and covered with mud from lying in the swamp. She looked like she had clawed her way out of a grave.
Was she in truth a psychopath now? Or just a wounded animal? Was there anything human left in her?
There was only one way to find out. If she attacked it was only what he deserved. But he couldn't let her kill him. Not when she might go for the others.
Holding out his hand he could only say one thing and hope she knew he meant it with every fiber of his being.
"I'm sorry."
