Chapter 4: Attack of the Fan Club & Ensuing Awkward Moments
It happened again. James could have sworn he saw a flash of red shimmer across the doorway of the Transfiguration classroom and out of sight. He was tempted to go out to the corridor to see what was going on, but the class was taking an exam and he didn't want to leave this particular bunch unsupervised. He glanced at the students in the back corners of the room, huddled in a deceptively studious way over their parchment. He could just see them all pooling their answers or rigging some sort of trap above his desk while he was out of sight, especially the Slytherin group. It seemed Snape had been busily brainwashing all of them to hate the new Professor Potter, and they gave him an inordinate amount of trouble. Sighing, he got up to pace the front of the room.
Lily sat on the cold stone floor in the corridor and clutched her chest, breathing hard. That was close. She'd been outside James's classroom—not spying, of course, merely…er…observing—and had leaned a bit too far towards the doorway in her attempts to get a good look at the pretty Ravenclaw fourth-year who sat in the corner. The newest addition to James's fan club, if she'd heard correctly.
Lily had been organizing papers at the end of class when she'd overheard a group of girls talking about it. She'd "accidentally" dropped her quills on the floor in order to get closer and listen in on the conversation without being blatantly obvious.
"Cameron wants to join the club," one of the girls had been saying, giggling. "Would you believe it, she actually thinks she has a chance with him."
One of the girls who Lily recognized as the Hufflepuff "president" of James's fan club sniffed and tossed her golden curls. "As far as I can tell, he hasn't really been receptive to anyone so far. But I do think that if he were to pay any attention to any of the girls here, it would be me. After all, I am the President of his fan club."
Several of the girls looked a bit disgruntled at her arrogance, but they didn't say anything.
"I suppose we'd better let her join us, anyway," a tall brunette said speculatively. "The more the merrier, yea? And she sits in the front corner of his class next hour, too, with a good view of his desk. She can find out more about him without having to ask him outright."
"I'm sure James would tell us anything we wanted to know if we asked; he's ever so nice," a girl with long, wavy honey-coloured hair sighed. "I asked him whether he played Quidditch while he was here at Hogwarts, and he told me that he used to be a chaser and captain of Gryffindor team." The girls squealed, several jumping up and down giddily. Lily gagged.
At this point, one of the girls exclaimed that they would be late, and the whole group exited the classroom, leaving Lily still squatting on the floor with her quills, unnoticed.
Lily had, by this time, started fuming. Where did they get off calling a professor by his first name?? Did James give them permission? The nerve! Ohhhh, he's got something coming…And why do all these girls like James so much anyway? A FAN CLUB??? What in hell? And he's not so great-looking. He's all right, but nothing spectacular. And okay, so he's intelligent—so what? There are lots of smart wizards out there. And so he's good at Quidditch. I bet he bragged about it, too. Insufferable prat.
All the same, while she packed up her belongings, Lily kept remembering that some stupid Cameron girl wanted to join the fan club. She sat in the front corner, eh? It was Lily's free period, and she was caught up on grading…she might as well stop by the Transfiguration classroom, it was on the way to the faculty room anyway…
Which was why Lily had been in front of James's classroom, peeking in. She'd been running around in front of the classroom for the past twenty minutes, trying to get a good view of the students sitting in the front row without James noticing her presence. It was rather difficult, since James was a bit sensitive about being watched. Damn Auror instincts, grumbled Lily mentally. She was almost certain that he'd caught sight of her rushing by the doorway, but as he hadn't come out into the hallway to check, she decided she was still safe. Peeking through one of the classroom windows, she found that she could see the Ravenclaw girl—what was her name? Camilla? Chamomile? Oh, right, Cameron. What kind of name was that anyway? Who wanted to name their daughter Cameron??—quite clearly from her new vantage point. The girl was scribbling busily, but every so often Lily could see her steal glances at James's desk. Speaking of which, why wasn't James at his desk? But wait—were those footsteps she heard? Lily decided to make a run for it before James discovered her. It might be a little embarrassing if he were to find her outside his classroom. He might think she was jealously spying, or something.
"HEY!" James shouted. Just about his whole class jumped. "Sorry," he mumbled to them. "Continue." He squinted out into the hall. Had he been hallucinating? Or had that really been Lily peeking through his classroom window? He hadn't been able to get a good look at whoever it was, but he had just caught a glimmer of red hair before the person disappeared down the hall. It couldn't have been Lily…could it? He checked the time. It was her free period, after all…
He returned to sitting at his desk, pulling out some third years' homework and beginning to sift through the stack of parchment, grading with red ink. Suddenly he could feel someone watching him again—but this time it was someone inside his classroom. Glancing up abruptly, he caught one of the girls staring at him instead of at her exam. She was a fourth-year Ravenclaw, if he remembered correctly; what was her name? Camilla? Chamomile? Something that started with a Cam—ah, yes, Cameron. She was looking back at her parchment now, blushing. He wondered idly whether he had something on his face or robes, or whether the girl was ill. Why was she staring at him, and why was her face so red? He returned to grading, shrugging slightly. His brow furrowed as he thought of Lily. Had that really been her?
Lily made it to the faculty room unscathed and collapsed, panting, into one of the armchairs in front of the fire. Hopefully James hadn't seen her. She would have to be more careful next time—maybe cast some sort of complex invisibility charm.
James dismissed his class after collecting the exam parchment and began arranging his papers. The Ravenclaw girl, Cameron, stopped shyly before his desk. She was joined by about a half-dozen girls from the class; all of them were either nervously twittering or fixing their hair self-consciously (or both).
"Yes?" James asked, when he'd finally noticed the crowd.
"Um…well…Professor, we were wondering…why is it that you and Professor Evans seem to hate each other so much?" Cameron asked, her face very pink.
"We saw you two hexing each other that time. Did you two know each other before you came to teach?" Another Ravenclaw girl queried, brushing her straight black hair behind her ears.
James sighed. "Well…yes, we knew each other at Hogwarts. We were both here a few years ago, you know." Several of the girls nodded. One of them, a bright Gryffindor who volunteered often in class, piped up suddenly. "Weren't you two a couple back in Hogwarts? I remember my sister mentioning how you and Lily Evans were together. She was a bit jealous, I think—but she admitted you two were a cute couple."
"Yes…er…well. We were a couple back then. But—" James was cut off by another girl. "I heard you were enemies! My brother was always laughing about some of the hexes that you two would put on each other."
James laughed. "Well, we did have a sort of love-hate relationship back then. Some of those hexes were really hard to get rid of, too. Lily must have known enough of those 'won't-disappear-until-forty-eight-hours-later' spells to last a lifetime…" His eyes narrowed a bit, though his mouth quirked humorously. "She still does, actually."
"So why is it that you two can't seem to get along? I like Professor Evans very much—she's a really cool professor, and she's taught us a lot of interesting charms—" the girl broke off suddenly, looking embarrassed. "I mean, you're a cool professor, too, and—"
James smiled, then frowned. "I don't know. We used to get along." He seemed to be talking mostly to himself now. "Something just went wrong somewhere…it's just that…Lily can be so irritating sometimes. And she's got that redheaded temper of hers—no patience at all—doesn't listen to reason, just launches into it and starts yelling—" James stopped. The girls were all listening intently, and he knew that if he went further, he'd just start in on an angry tirade about all of Lily's faults. He really shouldn't be talking about her to the students behind her back—he knew that keeping the conflict private was really important for both of them, professionally speaking…if the students found out too many weaknesses about either of them, it would just be that much harder to maintain authority. James decided to switch gears, and began herding the girls out of his classroom, talking about Quidditch as hard as his tongue could go. The girls obviously didn't want to leave, and kept pestering him with questions until he was finally able to practically chase them out.
After getting rid of the girls, James was tired and definitely ready for his free period. It had taken him nearly half an hour this time to dispose of that annoying group that somehow always materialized out of thin air. It wasn't that he didn't like the attention—after all, it was nice to be appreciated somewhere, seeing as how Lily obviously didn't appreciate him anymore. But…the girls were so giggly. And they wouldn't stop asking him questions that were coming to quite a personal level. It would only be a matter of time, he thought morosely, before they started asking him about the color and texture of his underwear. He remembered having a rather large following while he was in school, but never anything like this—and he suspected that being with Lily for the last three years at Hogwarts had something to do with it all. In fact, if he remembered correctly, the girls had continued following him around for a while, after he and Lily had gotten together, throwing angry looks and comments at Lily every so often. He'd have resorted to physical violence a couple times, had Lily and Remus not held him back (Sirius had been all for it, and seemed a bit put out when James had calmed. Then again, Sirius wasn't known to be the most rational person when it came to holding emotions in check—take, for example, the Snape and Whomping Willow incident. It still gave James a massive headache when he remembered it.).
It wasn't until the day that the girls had caught Lily alone in a deserted corridor, while the Marauders were off in detention, that the harassment had come to a screeching halt. What exactly happened there James never figured out, but Lily had come back to Gryffindor tower a bit later than usual that night with an angry but triumphant flush in her cheeks and a dangerous sparkle in her eyes. When asked about the situation by the few who knew about it, she had responded by growling something unintelligible and fingering her wand the way a sadist would finger a freshly sharpened knife; since then, there had been no more questions asked, but no more annoying girls following them around either.
James trudged along the corridors, thinking about his days at Hogwarts, with an absent smile on his face. He decided to head back to his room, rather than to the faculty room, simply because he was too tired to deal with anyone at the moment. A familiar voice broke through his reverie and made him snap to attention, however: it was Lily's.
Lily was teaching seventh-years some complicated charms theory. James went to stand at his regular spot near her door, where she wouldn't be able to see him, and watched her teach her class. Or rather, he started out watching Lily teach, but ended up just glaring at the seventh-year boys, who kept raising their hands and volunteering very stupid pickup lines when Lily called on them. James couldn't believe Lily could actually laugh at them…she was married, for goodness' sake! He stood there glowering for a few minutes longer, lost in his thoughts, until he suddenly realized that Lily had finished her lecture and was now taking questions—which were heading in a rather personal direction.
"Why don't you and Professor Potter get along?" one of the girls was asking. "I thought you two were a couple while you were at Hogwarts yourselves. You seemed happy enough together then. What happened?" Lily snapped to attention at the question, suddenly remembering that this was a seventh-year class she was teaching; these students had been at Hogwarts during her and James's time. A flush rose up her cheeks as she remembered how…close…she and James had acted, as Head Girl and Boy. They had rarely been seen apart, actually, and McGonagall had found them several times in rather compromising positions…oh, dear...
James was thinking thoughts somewhere along the same lines, and his face was getting a bit red, as well. He found himself waiting with bated breath for Lily's answer.
Lily let out a breath she hadn't even noticed that she was holding, and turned towards the blackboard, ready to erase the notes she'd written there with her wand. "Well…er…we just…seem to be…that is to say…we get on each other's nerves a bit more now…"
"But why, Professor?" asked a particularly inquisitive girl. "I happen to think Professor Potter is a wonderful teacher. He's so nice, and easy to talk to…why don't you get along with him?" The girl was blushing madly now, and Lily guessed that she was part of James's ever-growing fan club. Her eyes darkened significantly.
"This is hardly a proper subject for discussion during Charms, but…Well, let me tell you something. James may seem like he's nice and easygoing or…whatever. But that doesn't mean he's incapable of being an inconsiderate, daft pr—" Lily seemed to realize what she'd been saying, and flushed as she sat down on top of her desk. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that. Professor Potter has his merits as well as his faults. Let's leave this discussion at that, shall we?"
"Professor Snape says that the two of you never could settle your differences like rational beings. That you were both quick-tempered and always disturbing the peace with your little arguments." One of the Slytherin girls said coolly, ignoring the way Lily's eyes were glimmering with barely suppressed anger. "And from seeing the way you two were throwing hexes at one another for everyone's benefit last time, one can hardly question him."
One of the Slytherin boys—presumably the girl's boyfriend—chose this point to join the fray. "Yes, really, Professor. It's hardly fitting behavior for teachers to exhibit. Have you ever considered—"
By now Lily's knuckles were white from gripping the edge of her desk, trying to control her temper. She interrupted the boy in an extremely icy voice, throwing him and his girlfriend a poisonous glare. "Thank you for your comments, but they are hardly fitting for class. A point each from Slytherin." The couple fell silent, though they were clearly angry. Lily continued. "Are there any more questions about Charms?" When she was greeted with silence, she nodded brusquely. "Well, then. You're all allowed to go a bit early today. Be sure not to disturb other classes on your way out." As the students began to pack up their bags, several of the boys crowded around Lily's desk. James was practically shaking in anger—but there wasn't anything he could do about it, and he certainly didn't want Lily finding out he'd been eavesdropping. He also desperately wanted to stay and listen to what the boys were going to say, but decided not to risk being seen by the exiting students and took off down the hall at a fast clip.
It took Lily fifteen minutes of snappish remarks to finally make the seventh-year boys go away. This group was particularly persistent, being a combination of Hufflepuffs who were a bit slow to catch her sarcasm and Slytherins who caught her sarcasm but didn't care. She suspected that these particular Slytherin boys only pestered her because they wanted to annoy her, not because they actually thought her attractive; the seventh-years remembered her well enough from her years at Hogwarts to know that she wasn't from a pureblooded family. She sighed as she cleaned up the room.
By the end of the day, Lily and James were both rather tired and irritable. James had made it back to their lounge first, and lay on the couch near the fireplace, hoping to get a brief nap in before dinner. He'd just been drifting off when the portrait-hole opened, and Lily tumbled in. She dropped all her things onto the floor in the process, making a huge racket and waking James up abruptly.
He glared at her, then smirked. "A bit clumsy today, are we?"
Lily glared back. "Oh, shut it, Potter." She collected her things whilst fuming, and threw her bag onto one of the tables when she was finished. "It's only because you left your stupid shoes lying in front of the portrait-hole. Why can't you put your things away for a change?! You're such a slovenly—"
"I'm sorry, but I don't want to be a neat freak like you!" James interrupted, voice harsh. His eyes widened when he realized what he'd said.
Lily's stunned eyes had filled with tears for a moment, and she suddenly looked very small and vulnerable. James had sworn to himself a long time ago that he would never call Lily a "freak," no matter how angry he got; the word brought up too many painful memories. There were the times Petunia had called Lily the name during their childhood because of the "abnormal" occurrences she'd brought about by unknowingly using magic…the times she'd been called that during the sisters' joint time at home during summer and winter vacations after they'd both gone off to boarding school. Most painful to Lily was the last time she'd communicated with Petunia—it was the last word Petunia had left Lily with when their parents had died and the two of them had gone separate ways. (Petunia had gone off to marry her boyfriend, Vernon Dursley, with his unhealthy but rather lucrative interest in drills; Lily had gone to stay with James and Sirius.) Lily had written a letter to her sister, hoping at last to have some sort of armistice established between them. The only reply she'd gotten was a single sheet of cheap letter-paper, on which only one word was scrawled with apparent hatred behind every misshapen letter: FREAK.
James knew Lily was especially sensitive to the word, and feared and abhorred it more than any other rude name she'd ever been called. It had taken Lily a long time to come to terms with the way her sister treated her all through her life—it was hard for Lily to understand the blind contempt she was faced with in the person of her sister, as she was so well-loved by her parents. Even the Slytherins' constant whisperings and open insults of "mudblood" had little effect on her in comparison. James could cheerfully have smacked himself with a beater's club for that slip of the tongue.
But Lily wasn't one to stay hurt long. Her defenses were up in a flash, and the sad, pained look in her eyes was replaced by one of rage. She picked up her bag and headed for her room.
James grabbed her by the arm as she stalked past him. He wasn't going to let it end like this.
Lily tried to pull away from James's grasp, but he was holding on too tightly. She gave up and stood still, stubbornly looking at the ground. James gulped, looking down at her, suddenly not knowing what to say. Apologize, you git, he thought fiercely. You went too far this time. Apologize before it's too late.
By now Lily was getting impatient (as mentioned before, patience wasn't one of her virtues). He insulted her, and now he wanted her to stand here and wait for more insults? She took a breath and flung her head back and looked James straight in the eye. She had never thought he would stoop so low.
James, who had been trying to think of a good way to phrase what he'd wanted to say, was suddenly rendered speechless when Lily threw her head back and stared him fully in the face with large green eyes. He took in the emotions that played in their depths—the rage, the injured pride, the bitterness…but also the hurt that lurked beneath them all, and hints of the one emotion that stabbed him and made him draw a sharp breath—betrayal. His mouth went dry, and he couldn't, for the life of him, think of anything to say that would fix things.
Lily stared at James, searching for something in his face. She knew he was sorry for what he said—she could see it clearly in the shocked brown eyes that were gazing into hers. But there was a great deal of anger, pain, and frustration there as well. He shut them for a moment, taking deep breaths, and then opened them to stare into hers again. His expression was now sad and confused, but with an edge—there was harshness in his glance, and something uncontrollable that she couldn't put a name to, but had seen before in a somewhat different context. As Lily struggled to pinpoint where she'd seen that expression before, wracking her anger-ridden mind, she suddenly realized that she and James were standing close—very close. The room was very warm—so why was she shivering? His hands were now gripping her arms almost painfully. Lily licked her lips unconsciously, her mouth suddenly unconscionably parched. She watched James's eyes narrow as they followed the path her tongue had taken, and swallowed hard, trying her best to keep up her enraged expression, even though she knew it was wavering visibly.
Oh, no, he doesn't…was the only comprehensible thought that crossed her mind before James had lowered his head and kissed her…and everything else was swept away.
The feeling was familiar—the warmth of James's embrace, his arms tight around her, then his hand pulling at her hair, which had been twisted up on her head. His fingers deftly pulled the pins out and tangled themselves in the locks that fell free down her back. His lips moved slowly against hers, taking fierce possession with bruising pressure. Lily could feel his anger still apparent behind the kiss, and it recalled her own, so quickly forgotten. Her brain told her to pull away, to step back out of his arms and to slap him. But her senses—they were reeling, telling her to hold on to the feeling for as long as she could. She kissed him back, her own anger evident in her force. Her arms slipped up around his neck, her fingers running along his robes and finally finding their place at the nape of his neck, where they traced light circles on his skin. Her aghast brain nagged at her persistently, but was silenced when she felt James glide his tongue along her lips. It was all raw senses now, as Lily opened her mouth to the taste of him. It's been so long…
Somehow their robes slipped to the floor unheeded. Without breaking the kiss, which was steadily growing deeper, James lifted Lily in his arms and stumbled to the nearest door—which happened to be the one leading to Lily's room. You really shouldn't be doing this, his brain said. You're angry. Both of you are. But his hand had already slipped under the blouse hem. He delighted in the warmth of her soft skin—and ignored his brain. He tripped a bit on the stairs, distracted, but was able to make his way to the bed with little trouble. His mind took note, even in the haze it was in, that Lily now wore a chain about her neck that he had never noticed. As his lips grazed over the pendant, he was jolted halfway back to awareness by the familiar feel of her wedding ring. So that's where it's been. His smile as he nipped her softly below the jaw was exultant and relieved.
Lily's hand wandered down from its place at his neck, evoking a slurred murmur against her throat: "Lily…Lily…it's been so long…" The full-body contact made them both shudder.
Perhaps out of habit from the times when they'd slept over in each other's rooms as students, James pulled the bed-curtains shut.
Notes:
I'm not too sure how comfortable I am with this chapter...as mentioned before (DID I mention this before?), this is my first attempt at fanfic, or at any semi-public sort of writing besides my academic papers (and it's not like many people've read those either), so I'm reeeeally not used to writing sap and love scenes. And uh...this love scene sort of...took me by surprise. Did it take you by surprise? I keep trying to justify why it happened—because I'm not too sure of it myself—so it was definitely a spur-of-the-moment type of thing for both me and our favorite couple.
With that last L/J argument...well, I guess I was going for one of those times where you're fighting with someone you truly care about, and you accidentally cross over some lines. Not necessarily anything HUUUGE, but still rather important and acutely hurtful. Anyway, does this merit a PG-13 rating? I really can't decide...because I mean, this fic is definitely not going to be all about the snog-and-shag, and the scene wasn't graphic at all (by my standards, anyway). Hm.
I seem to have garnered all the clichéd ideas possible for this fic…I mean, the whole fan club thing…? Ah well…as Everblue3 put it so aptly—so call me normal. :)
Anyway, I guess I'm trying to upload more chapters since who knows when the next time I'll be able to be online will be…:(
