Author's Note: Chapter Two here! See, I told you that it would be up quick. And! It's longer than the first chapter. Yay! It's not the best chapter and a little boring but it gives you an idea of what life is like on the war front. ::Starts sing, "War! Ugh! Good God, y'all!" Realizes people are staring:: Oops. Sorrie. Anyways, it just lays some basic information of daily life. Oh and if Harry's character seems a little off, there is a reason for it. What is it? It's that: I suck at writing Harry. I'll leave him to JKR, thankee very much. Also, he has gone through a lot and he is seventeen now in this time frame. A lot can change between fourteen and seventeen. Like one's sexual preference… ::Whispers:: I'm sure he was just suppressing all those tendencies those first four years…
Pairings: Remus and Sirius (Uh—hello!) Mentionings of: Draco/Harry and Ron/Hermoine
Rating: As of now, PG-13 (This chapter actually fits into the PG rating. Wow.)
Disclaimer: ::Pouts:: My Remus and Sirius! ::Grabs Remus and Sirius as JKR tries to pull them away, claiming they're hers:: My Remus and Sirius! ::JKR manages to finally free them as upset fangirl pouts:: Fine! They're her Remus and Sirius. ::Whimpers::
Fathers, Sons, and Boyfriends—Oh My!
Sirius awoke again when it was morning. A black dawn greeted him as he struggled to get up, find the will to get on with the day, and finally push himself out of bed. He staggered down the narrow staircase of the tent, and, when finding that the rest of its occupants were already out and about for the day, he grabbed his walking stick and headed out to find some solace before attending a strategic planning meeting at the main tent where Dumbledore stayed.
Dark rain clouds covered the field they resided in for the time being. They choked out all the deathly, spirit-rising rays of the sun, leaving the ground swathed in shadows and keeping the air a crisp, tingling cold. A biting wind blew in sudden and Sirius pulled his cloak around him a little tighter, to keep the chill out. He smiled bitterly to himself, as he looked up into the thick mass of dark, swirling gray that masked the sky, pleased that nature had begun to agree with him and take on such a dark, cynical outlook.
The clouds had obviously already leaked some rain before he had arose because his boots left footprints in the moody ground, releasing from the dirt with a smuck each time he took a step. His cane, unfortunately, found a peculiar soft spot and decided to trap itself in the layers of wet earth. Sirius stumbled violently as he found that it would take more than just the normal amount of muscle to lift the twisted rod. The unexpected pull of his muscles flared his knee injury again and he gasped out in pain, reflexively grabbing for his wounded joint but still not letting go of the stick. The uncoordinated actions did not permit his body to stay erect as it was and so he fell roughly in the mud. He shouted out in surprise as his shoulder connected with the ground. He let out a stifled obscenity and recollected his bearings. Fortunately, the force of the fall pulled his cane loose. Unfortunately, it had also direct some attention his way. He saw someone begin to approach him after exiting a tent nearby, and without looking who it really was, he began to try to pull himself upward, using just his arms a the cane. The task was a bit more trying on his already sore muscles then he wanted but he did eventually manage to right himself.
By this time though, the person had spotted him—if they hadn't already before—and was coming to his aid. He was about to brush them off and tell them very sternly that he didn't need to be babysat all the time when he realized who it was.
"Are you all right, Sirius?"
He smiled gently at the young man's care for him and gave him a reassuring nod, while tussling his messy black hair. "I'm all right, Harry. Had a bit of a spill is all. Not quite used to walking with this stick yet." He lifted the pole in question and waved it around in the air to demonstrate his point. "I'm getting better at it though." He grinned sadly at him.
"That's good," his godson replied cheerily, happy to see that his godfather was at least coming out of him room now. He smiled back, though only with as much gusto as Sirius.
Sirius looked at the man, for really he wasn't a boy anymore. He was seventeen now and should have started his last year at Hogwarts last month in September, but unfortunately the War didn't allow time for schoolwork. Harry was bright though. He could catch up easily. The affects the battles had on his schoolwork weren't what usually worried Sirius. His godson had seen lots so terrible things already in his young life. There was a sparkle in those bright green eyes, still categorically framed by a pair of wire-rimmed glasses, that just didn't shine as bright anymore. In fact the only times Sirius ever saw it was when Harry truly smiled, which was usually only around his charming bleach-hair blond boyfriend. Sirius would be fine with putting up with their little lover's skirmishes as long as they made Harry smile.
"So," Sirius began, happy to be able to change the subject away from himself for once, "where were you?" He had noticed Harry seemed a little flushed when he came out of the tent.
"Oh," he chuckled nervously, a blush creeping in along those pale cheeks. He casted his eyes downward and grin mischievously to himself. "I was off visiting Draco in the hospital tent," he murmured so that Sirius had to strain his ear to hear him.
It was pretty clear to him from Harry's actions, and also from remembering what it was like to be a seventeen-year-old boy, what had happened. He grinned inwardly, glad to know that he was still taking an interesting in "normal," everyday things, like kissing, but thought it not very good parenting to let Harry know how he felt. "Oh?" he responded, trying hard to give Harry a strict look and keep the smile from appearing on his lips and ruining his old guise. "And what did you talk about?"
Harry turned his gaze back to the ground and answered with a bit of a smirk and suppressed chuckle, "Oh, not much…" He glanced up at Sirius. An old twinkle was blazing in his dusty gray eyes, much like the one he used to get when he would make a suggestive comment to Remus and enjoyed watching Remus tried to squirm out of it from embarrassment. He saw him abruptly try to smother the roguish grin that was trying to take over his mouth. Harry knew that Sirius wanted to try to give him the right impression of being reprimanding but he knew his godfather too well. Remus was always the parental one and Sirius was the one who smiled impishly all through the conversation, completely enjoying the fact that his godson was taking after his father so well. The memory of Remus, also a father to him in many ways, saddened Harry but he smiled somberly at remembering all the good times. He turned his attention back to the matter at hand and trying to get away with sneaking kisses from his boyfriend.
" 'Not much…' " Sirius was repeating over and over again in a sort of mantra, trying to figure out a good way to chide Harry for breaking rules in the hospital tent, knowing full well that when he was younger be broke those rules and many more, visiting Remus in the hospital wing after nights of the full moon or when certain pranks went awry. The conscious thought of Remus made his blood boil again, his heart clench with a frigid chill, the air stop in his lungs. Harry must of have him gasp suddenly and Sirius had to quickly blink back the tears that were forming in his eyes. He looked down at the slightly shorter, dark-haired man. "I was just thinking…" he started to explain in a meek voice. He didn't need to continue. Harry knew what he was going to say.
"I know," he said comfortingly, placing a calloused hand on his arm. "I was just thinking of him too." He smiled sympathetically at Sirius.
The older of the two sighed. "You know, he was so much better at this than I. He could explain things so that you understood but he didn't make you feel bad, like you couldn't hate him or anything." Sirius sighed deeply again. "He would of made a great dad…" He drifted off and looked away from Harry.
"He did make a great dad," he replied encouragingly. "And so do you." Sirius looked down at him quizzically. "Don't be so hard on yourself." His godfather quickly pulled the messy-haired boy into a tight embrace and let him go before anyone could see and embarrass Harry.
The walked along is silence for a while, making there way slowing around the outskirts of the small, situated camp. "You know something?" Harry asked suddenly after a good while of comfortable silence, giving them both some time to think.
"I don't know a great many things, Harry," Sirius replied sardonically, not looking over to see the scowl on his godson's face. He knew it was there and smirked at bit at it.
"As I was saying… I just realized something. I've been meaning to tell you it for a while now," Harry continued, ignoring Sirius's blatant, somewhat self-imposed bitterness.
"How can you've been meaning to tell me for a while when you've only just realized it?" Sirius pondered aloud as they rounded a tent at the far end of the camp.
"Well, okay, I realized it a while back but I couldn't tell you then. I had to go visit Draco."
"Oh, I see. You're boyfriend is more important than your godfather?" Sirius smirked down at him.
Harry stared at him incredibly. "Sirius, I'm a seventeen-year-old wizard. Of course my boyfriend is more important!" Sirius laughed aloud at this plain statement of teenager-dom. And he was worried that Harry wouldn't be a normal adolescent…
"Oh, forgive me for assuming you actually cared about your family," Sirius responded sarcastically. "I didn't know your boyfriend was prioritized over me."
Harry chuckled and hit him playfully in the arm. "You know I care about you. And Draco isn't my boyfriend. We're just—"
"What?" Sirius interrupted him. "Really good friends?" He elevated his eyebrows doubtfully.
"Well, no. It's just… Well we haven't actually said that we were dating. We haven't even been out on a real date or anything. There' s just a lot of arguing then…" He stopped himself just before he was about to say, "kissing." There were just still some things that he couldn't tell even a cool guy like Sirius about. Luckily, he understood.
"Ah. I got'cha. Well, maybe setting bounds and labeling relationships isn't the best thing for you guys right now—except for the setting bounds thing, of course. You two should have lots of bounds." He eyed Harry to tell him that he was still kidding him but expected that he knew that he would want him to not go too far with Draco too soon. He shrugged and continued. "I think you should just be with the people who make you happy. We don't know what's going to happen from day to day. We need to just appreciate the time we have with the people we care about." He smiled at Harry.
"Thanks, Sirius. That's really sweet." Harry felt somewhat comforted by the relationship advice Sirius had just given him. He liked coming to his godfather for advice. He was really one of the only adult males he had that he could go to. The thought reminded him of the topic he wanted to talk about. "Speaking of that, that thing I wanted to tell you…"
"Oh right. Right!" Sirius stopped and faced him. "I'm all ears."
Harry nervously shifted his weight from foot to foot before finally looking at Sirius. "Okay, you know when you were talking about being a good father?"
"Yes?"
"Well, I had this dream about a month ago. It was very strange. It was like I could get my dad back—like he would be alive again and I could live with him and it would just be like he had been away for a very long time—but in order to that, I would have to give up you and Remus, like I could never of had you at all in my life. Like you never existed. I never met you or something. And I had to decide between this."
He paused here and gathered the expression of Sirius's face. It was clear he was a bit confused where he was going with this, but from the look off sadness and hurt, he thought Harry was going to say that Sirius was a great dad to him, but he still wanted his dad back, not that he could blame him. Harry continued.
"Well, anyway, the dream ended before I had to choose but it got me thinking. If there were some way I could get my dad back, but I had to loose you and Remus to do so, what would I do?" This was the part where Sirius braced himself for being told that he could never replace the image Harry had of James as his father. Not that he should, Sirius reminded himself sternly when he still found himself wishing that Harry might.
"Well, I decided that I wouldn't want to get my dad back then, if it meant giving up you two. You have been really great to me and you're more of a family then I could ever hope for. I never knew my dad. I've been told he was a really great guy." Sirius nodded vigorously in agreement but stayed silent to let Harry finish. "I feel it too, that he was really great. I know it. It's just that I never met him. I don't know that if I never met you and Remus and my dad came back now, that I would be as happy. I wouldn't want to give up my life for a life I don't even know. I've sort of always thought I wished that—and would wish that—because I never knew my parents. But I don't anymore. You and Remus have been so great so I don't wish that anymore."
He stopped there and hugged his godfather, who was at the point of shocked silence, tears beginning to form in his eyes. Harry sensed his uncomfortableness with the endearing action and words, and his startle at them. He smiled and continued to hug him until he felt Sirius recover and hug him back.
Sirius pushed him away and sniffed melodramatically. "Ah," he fawned and nudged Harry gently on the chin. "You, kid. I love you too." He kissed Harry loudly at the forehead, right on his scar, with much mortification and protesting from his godson. He chuckled when Harry then passionately looked around to see if anyone had seen.
"Oh calm down. No one saw," Sirius assured him as Harry peered around the same tent for a third time.
"I'm just making sure," he replied, still checking and then looking around the other side. Sirius laughed loudly again. Harry finally had scoped out the area enough and decided that the coast had been indeed safe like Sirius had said. "Okay," he told the older one breathlessly, jogging back to him. "No on there."
"See? What did I tell you?" Sirius smirked, ruffling Harry's hair. The boy pulled his head out of reach and smiled. "Now then," Sirius continued. "Why don't you go back to the hospital tent and find your little 'really good friend' and have some fun? I'm stick of this mushy stuff!" He grinned broadly at him.
"Sirius," Harry chided. "That's not what you're supposed to tell a teenager! Go 'have fun…' " Already, though, he was backing away, towards the rest of the camp.
"Oh well," he sighed, watching Harry creep backwards. "You know more about parenting right now than I do. Why don't you give yourself a little lecture when you're done and we'll call it even?"
"Sirius…" Harry chuckled, still inching away.
Sirius made little shooing actions with his hands. "Oh! And tell Ron and Hermoine they might as well start something too!" He yelled as Harry was beginning to turn and walk away. "It's about time they started something!" Harry laughed and jogged out of view, no doubt going to see that particular bleached blond cynic.
Sirius chuckled to himself at his godson's antics—and at his own—feeling for once, in many days, actually rather pleasant. He turned to start walking when he was reminded of why he had originally started walking away this direction as a sharp complaint came from his knee. "Oh right…" he muttered to himself, no longer feeling as cheery as he did a minute ago. "I got to see Snape about the pain-killing potion." With that, he limped off in the direction of Severus Snape's tent.
Author's Note: Ahh. So was that so painful to read? I hope not. I know it got a little boring. I'm not saying it will get better but it might. If you REVIEW it might… Hint hint. Just press the little "Go" button down there in the left-hand corner of the screen. You know… that thingie… down there… ::Points down:: Anyways… not sure how many chapters this will have. Possibly around three more. Um… shoo! Review! Pwease? I'll give you a cookie? ::Holds out carrot and cinnamon flavored peanut butter cookie:: Not working, huh? If you don't, I'll continue to sing. ::Continues the song from before the chapter, "What is it good for? Absolutely nothing! War!"::
