I have left a note for her on the dining table, telling her that the Vira woman called. I even left food in the refrigerator for her. The up side of all this is that I noticed she's thrown out most of her beer, so that the refrigerator actually has space for edible food.
Now, things would be somewhat perfect, if she'd just come home.
*****
I must have fallen asleep, because it's morning now. Groggily, I glance at the clock. Wow, I didn't oversleep. Not only that, I'm actually awake fifteen minutes earlier than necessary.
What the hell, I'll just sleep for another fifteen minutes.
*****
I think I should get an alarm clock that actually works. I slept through the ridiculously soft alarm, and now I'm late for school.
Okay, so I swatted the damn thing off and threw it against the wall and went back to sleep. But still, what is the use of having an alarm clock if it can't wake me completely and fully? I was still half-asleep when the clock started to ring.
I'm cycling to school now, after wolfing down two slices of bread and a glass of orange juice. Mother left me another note, which said, "Had things to do last night, sorry I couldn't come home earlier. Make your own breakfast. Hopefully I'll see you tonight. Love, Mom. P.S. That 'Vira woman' is your aunt."
I wonder what were the 'things' that she had to do. Um, then again, I wonder where the heck she went. She left early again this morning, which explains the note, and by the look of things, I doubt the new situation would differ much from the old one.
But whatever. I never said I cared.
I steer my bicycle into the school building. I narrowly avoid being touched by a group of swooning females who look suspiciously like the ones I was trapped with yesterday in the hallway and peddle quickly away. I check the big clock that hangs from the wall of the school. Shit, thirty minutes late for my first class. No wonder the carpark is so deserted.
I sling my backpack over my shoulder and stroll to the entrance of the school. A few teachers see me, but for some reason, they don't hassle me about being late. Instead, they kind of scurry away when they see me approaching.
I'm just a bloody kid, for goodness sake. I didn't know I was that intimidating. Now that I think about it, it is kind of fun.
First lesson of the day: Music.
Um, already missed it.
Second lesson of the day: Mathematics.
Awesome. Time to sle -
Oh yeah. I can't. Have to stay on the team. Have to keep awake. I just keep forgetting that.
*****
The Maths teacher is giving out the test everyone took yesterday. He's off about how majority of the class has done badly, did they not listen to his lessons? Differentiation is so easy, how can more than half of the class fail? It's an outrage, it's pathetic, the class is hopeless, blah blah freaking blah.
I stare out of the window. I had a nice dream last night. I dreamt that I was in the USA, playing basketball with a few friends whom I've never met before in real life, when a talent scout came up to me and gushed about how great my skills are, did I want to play in the NBA? I said 'yes' immediately, and then I was playing beside Michael Jordan. Our team was winning, and I had thirty points while MJ had forty. He told me 'good job' a few times, and when I did a splendid slam dunk, he was impressed. We hit it off immediately and life was great. I didn't have to bother with trivial crap like school, I didn't have to worry about absent mothers, and I didn't have to wonder about what could've been. I was living the life, and I was on top of the world.
Too bad it's just a dream.
"Rukawa!"
The teacher is standing in front of me, holding my test paper in his hand. His other hand is placed on his waist. He looks pissed off.
"Care to explain this?" he says, thrusting the paper at me.
I glance at it. 95%.
I look at the teacher, my face expressionless. I don't say anything.
His eyebrow begins to twitch. "I'm waiting for an answer," he says through gritted teeth.
I shrug. "I'm smart?"
That appears to be the final straw, for he loses his composure and shouts, "You cheated, didn't you!"
I sigh. This sucks. I fail tests and he gets on my back. I pass with flying colours and he gets on my back. What the hell does he want me to do? I thought he wanted me to pass. Well, I got a 95%. Isn't that passing enough?
"I didn't cheat."
"You deny it one more time and I'll send you to the principal's office!"
Ooh, scary. The principal is my pal. And threats are not scary when one hasn't done anything wrong in the first place. Besides, if I were to cheat, I would've done so a long, long time ago.
Actually, I wouldn't have. It's just not worth the trouble.
I shrug again. "I'm not lying."
"So you're telling me that you obtained a 95% by sleeping in my class, not paying attention and by not handing up homework?"
"I guess."
He's making a scene in front of his students. For once, the class is silent; everybody has their eyes glued on me, occasionally flitting to the teacher but mostly, they're watching me. Rukawa Kaede, being accused of cheating. Definitely a show to watch.
Now the teacher has to be boiling mad. I can't find any other ways to explain his scrunched up face, his protruded, flaring lips, and his bulging eyes. He looks like a crazy bull.
"Go to the principal's office. Now!"
Stupid Maths Teacher practically choked on the word 'now'; he is screeching and screaming like crazy teeny-boppers at rock concerts. Then again, you don't have to look that far. We have crazy teeny-boppers right here at Shohoku.
Looking past the teacher, I forcefully push my chair back so that it topples over. Glaring at whoever dares to look my way, I snatch my test out of the teacher's hands and stride out of the room.
*****
I am so goddamn sick of this. So tired of it. I can't believe the prejudice that stupid teacher has against me. Is it so hard to accept that I am actually -- gasp -- smart? I'm no genius and I know it, but it doesn't exactly take one either to understand differentiation or whatever Mathematics crap that the teacher throws at the class. I thought if I keep myself awake enough to do their tests, they'd get off my back and quit threatening me with the basketball team, but no! Things just get worse! They never used to send me to the principal's office when I was sleeping through tests and almost flunking out of school. Ironically, now that I'm not, I'm on my way to my second visit to the bloody Head of School's office in the week. And it's only freaking Tuesday.
I never asked for validity. I never asked for acceptance. I don't care about either. All I want to do is to get out of high school, out of Japan and to the USA and make myself a basketball star. That's all.
Is that too much to ask for?
*****
Jump shot. Success. Three-pointer. Success. Slam dunk. Success. Shot under the basket. Success. Free-throw. Success.
Now I'm sweating. Breathing heavily. Like how it is after an intensive training session. It's regular practice for the rest of the team but not for me. Today has really sucked and my usual way of dealing is to work like hell during practice to take my mind off things. It's worked fairly well so far.
I receive a pass from one of the subs and prepare to attempt a lay-up. I bend my body and dribble the ball between my legs, getting ready to take my shot, when I hear Anzai-sensei call my name.
"Rukawa-kun."
Looking up, I see him gesturing towards me, his face kind but blank, his eyes shielded behind his glasses. Puzzled, I walk over to him, the basketball tucked below my arm.
He leads me to the benches and takes a seat.
"Sit down. I want to talk to you."
I sit. Somehow, I have a feeling I know what this is about. I just don't think I should believe it yet.
"Rukawa-kun," he says, his voice reassuring as ever but I know better than that. "How is school?"
And he scores. I knew this was about school. The stupid principal wasn't making an empty threat after all, when he threatened to take me off the team. Again. The only difference is, this time he really did go to Anzai-sensei. What a shock.
I shrug, for I've nothing to say to that. Anzai-sensei knows what he needs to know from the principal. He doesn't need to hear it from me.
"From what I know," he goes on, "you've been failing most of your classes, haven't you?"
I shrug again. I can't tell him anything he doesn't already know.
He nods. He reaches into his jacket pocket and takes something out. He sets it down on the space between us and waits for me to speak.
I look at it. It's my differentiation test paper.
"Rukawa-kun. I am going to ask you just one question and I need you to be honest with me. Do you understand?"
His eyes are locked squarely on mine, and there's no escaping the intensity of his question, or of this moment, for that matter. But I don't answer. I just stare back.
"Did you cheat?"
The moment of truth. I don't even hesitate.
"No. I did not."
*****
When practice ended I find Akagi's sister waiting by the gym exit. I'm about to brush past her when she suddenly calls out my name.
"R-Rukawa-kun..."
I sigh mentally. My whole body feels like it's going to come apart anytime now, and all I want as of this moment is a nice, long sleep on my comfortable bed. I'm in no mood to deal with annoying groupies, Akagi's sister or not.
But it doesn't matter what I want, for she's walking after me.
"Um...I'm sorry if I'm intruding, but...well, I was just wondering...what did Anzai-sensei want with you?"
I continue walking as I mumble a
half-hearted reply.
"Some shit about some test. It's no big."
I'm walking out of the school building now. I think I hear Akagi's sister say behind me, "Oh...well, nice work during practice today...see you tomorrow..."
*****
At home now. Walking up the stairs to the apartment. I'm rummaging around my backpack for my keys but I can't seem to find them anywhere. This is frustrating. I am this close to my bed, which is already calling out for me, teasing me with temptation, and yet, I can't run to it just because I can't find my stupid keys.
Life sucks, indeed.
Okay, still can't find my keys. It's time to pour everything out. I turn my backpack upside down and watch as my stuff - candy wrappers, tissue papers, a few crumpled pieces of worksheets, two dirtied shirts, my differentiation test paper - comes tumbling out. When my backpack is emptied I peered inside. I'm greeted with nothing but black.
I glance at the floor. Kuso. No keys in sight. I must've dropped them somewhere in school.
I'm about to resign to my fate and accept the fact that I'm locked out of my own home when the door suddenly opens. I look up.
And see my mother looking back at me, a small smile playing on her lips.
"Lost your keys, Kaede?" she asks, shaking her head. "Come on in. It's chilly outside and you look half dead. I prepared you dinner. Are you hungry? You should be, after that intensive training you had."
My intensive training? How does she know? My fatigue doesn't show that much, does it? I know my stamina isn't as good as it should be - though I can safely say it's a lot better than Mitsui's - but that bad? I seriously need to focus on improving it.
I kneel down and sweep my stuff back into my bag. I follow my mother into our home and close the door softly behind me.
*****
As I wolf down an excellent meal of teriyaki chicken and miso soup, my mother sits across from me and is telling me about her day at work. She's raving about some talented student in her class, a high school student who goes to that college part-time after school. As she speaks her eyes twinkle with excitement, her hands go erratic as they gesture and wave, and I can't begin to understand why in the world the paternal figure chose to leave this beautiful woman.
"That's nice, Mom," I say between chews. I swallow. "Sounds like you're happy."
"Don't talk with your mouth full," she chides, but she's smiling. "Life's pretty good for me. I've never felt this alive since...well, you know."
As soon as those words left her mouth her eyes dull a little. It's so slight that I almost missed it, and when I didn't I wish I did.
Her wounds are still raw, after all this while.
I feel like I should say something to make things better, however little, but once again, Rukawa Kaede has turned into a mute. I don't know what to say. I don't even know what to think. All I can do is cast my eyes downwards and focus on my food.
Luckily, she doesn't relapse. Changing the subject immediately, she goes on to say, "I got a call from your coach today."
My head snaps up. Anzai-sensei called my mother?! When how and why? Why wasn't I aware? When did he get the time? Before practice? After practice? During practice? Wasn't he watching us the entire time? How did he get the time?!
"He told me about a misunderstanding that happened today."
Misunderstanding, my bloody hind foot. More like blatant prejudice. Outright discrimination. Disgusting bigotry.
"That wasn't a misunderstanding. The teachers hate me. It's simple as that."
My mother chuckles. "Don't be dramatic. They don't hate you. They just dislike you."
My hand freezes halfway to my mouth. I stare at my mother. A second of silence, and she bursts out laughing.
I roll my eyes, but I'm smiling where she can't see. "Very funny, Mom," I mutter. "You should pair up with Jim Carrey one of these days."
"Oh, stop being so sour," she protests with mock indignance. "It's all in jest. Poison in jest. No offence in the world!"
"And stop quoting 'Hamlet'."
"Why? What's wrong with quoting 'Hamlet'?"
"It's annoying."
She laughs again. "I'd continue fighting with you but it's going nowhere. Don't you want to know what Anzai-sensei said?"
I shrug. "Nothing I don't already know."
"Does that include 'Rukawa's an excellent basketball player, supremely talented and gifted'?"
He really said that? "Of course," I answer nonchalantly.
"What about this then: He spoke to the principal on your behalf and you get to stay on the team, as long as you keep up with your 95% and stop being rude to teachers."
I choke on the meat that's about to slide down my throat, thus kicking off a coughing fit, but that's not important. All I can think of is, I get to sleep during lessons again! Yosha!
Hey, keeping myself awake in class isn't part of the deal. All I have to do is to fill in answers for my tests and restrain myself from saying "do'ahou" to my inadequate teachers. Pretty simple. The biggest feat I've been made to tackle thus far is to stay awake in class. My new challenges are nothing to me.
"Feel better now, Kaede?"
I draw in a deep breath to stop my oesophagus from rattling. I nod. It's all I can do to keep myself from smiling.
*****
I'm in the kitchen, sitting on a stool and watching my mother wash my plates. I was going to do it myself but she insisted on doing it for me and refused to give in no matter how hard I tried to tell her that really, I can do it myself, so I just let her be.
I've been wanting to ask her something for quite a while now. I can't get it out of my mind. At the same time, I don't really dare to ask, for I'm afraid of what the answer may be. On the other hand, the question is really driving me insane. I can't take the not-knowing.
Sometimes, I can be such a girl.
"Oi."
"What is it?" she replies, her back to me.
"Where were you last night?"
She rinses off a plate and dries it. She turns to face me.
"I was helping that student I told you about with her art project. If things work out well, she may have a small exhibition of her own."
"Wow," I say. I'm truly impressed.
"Yeah. Why do you ask though?"
Suddenly, I'm fascinated with my fingernails. I stare at them and examine them carefully, as if trying to unlock a deep secret that only my fingernails hold.
Dammit, I'm not making sense. Still staring at my fingernails, I mumble, "I was worried about you."
Silence. I await the sting of rejection, but I shouldn't even bother. It's not just anyone I'm talking to. It's my mother.
She doesn't say anything. She comes over to me and envelopes me in a warm embrace.
At first, I feel my muscles tense.
Gradually though, I begin to relax. And I return the gesture.
A/N: FINALLY! CHAPTER ELEVEN! I'VE FINALLY DONE IT! ALL HAIL THE GREAT GENIUS! WOO-HOO!
Sorry if this chapter was on the boring side. Seriously don't know what to write. I've ten days off from school so I think I'll use this break to get the plot back. I've abandoned this poor fic for so long now. I almost forgot the plot. But yeah, I'll try to round it up soon.
I wouldn't be surprised if this fic has been forgotten. My last update was in bloody DECEMBER. Gad, I'm so ashamed. Yeah, anyway, I shan't ramble on any further. Replies to reviews:
fourteen: He sent out the survey with Sakuragi's answers because he's too lazy to delete them. I do that all the time. Bwahahahaha.
hagane: Haha, you're funny. Isn't Mitchy the best? I think he is. Yep, tensai in Chinese is 'tian cai'. The two languages share the same um, kanji. I mean, yeah. It's just that it's pronounced 'tian cai' in Chinese. Um, yeah. Thanks for the review. And thanks for the truce too. Fighting is baaaaaad.
chescaOtaku: LOL thanks. You're too kind. =)
diwata: Heh sorry. I'm from Singapore. Where are you from? Thanks for reading. I really appreciate it.
qianhui: I LOVE YOUR FIC! Everyone, check out qianhui's fic "My Descent Into Madness" at . It's amazing. Please update it soon okay?
fizah: Ay you know Xuwen? I don't know the other two people you mentioned in your nice review of my other Mitchy thingy. I presume they're from St Nicks too?
White Meteor: Relax. Rukawa's a 16-year-old male. Most 16-year-old males are hormonal. Be glad I didn't make him gay. If he were gay you can't have him, right? Yes. Um, Mitsui wasn't going to quit. Quitting didn't even cross his mind until he had that unfortunate injury. Didn't deserve to win MVP, huh? Who shot the winning shot with 9 seconds left? Mitsui! Duh! Who is the amazing three-point expert? Mitsui! If that's not MVP material I don't know what is! He didn't ruin Team Shohoku, he helped his team win against Shoyo and Ryonan for crying out loud! Um, yeah, before this becomes a novel: Jin's coach said that he doesn't have talent during the Shohoku vs. Kainan match. When Jin shot a successful three-pointer and Kogure was like, well, I forgot what he said. Kogure mentioned something about talent and Jin. And Jin's coach overheard and was like, "Jin? Talented? Yeah right!" =)
lambie: Yep, from St Nicks, though you probably know that by now. Sigh. I've been such a slacker. Glad you liked Ch 10. =)
iNsAnEbEl: Congrats! You're taking the O Levels this year! *throws confetti* I'm done with mine! Hehe, sorry, couldn't resist rubbing it in. I got out of that crap relatively unscathed though so don't worry, you'll do fine. You gotta study for it though, seriously. I was still slacking before the O Levels so I didn't do as well as I hoped to. Ah well. Anyway, thanks for the review.
jashuang: LOL. Um, yeah, back to school indeed. Although it's the holidays again now. Hehe. Have fun during these ten days.
-Yelen (red_knee_guard@lycos.com)
