Unread mail
By: Dark fire angel


DFA: I'm back, yup… BE PREPARED!! *Coughs and chokes* Ugh >.o Never try singing and eating at the same time. Anyhow ^^ As people encouraged me to continue, I did so… and viola! Lil chapter *Flails arms* Mah! It's turning into a philosophical fic! *Laughs* Nah, actually, it's just that it has lots of thought in it ^~ that and I wrote it at college break today… *Walks off*

Disclaimer: Yeah yeah… me no own Haku, Chihiro etc… -_-; Sad but true *Twitch* Actually that's one more thing to add to my list of 'things I dun own' *Wail*
~ - ~ - ~ - ~

Days passed and passed, Chihiro not receiving any kind of notification that Haku was alive... she even had to check into her computer several times during that week to make sure she hadn't just dreamed it all… but sure enough, there was the note still there, saved into her hard disk, intact like the first day. The more she read over her note, the more she wondered why in the nine hells he had notified himself to her through a computer. No real answer to this could be found, and for some strange reason she figured it'd take her longer to figure it out too.

The auburn haired girl shook her head in mock sorrow as she walked back into her room. She was lame… gods… what 1 year old girl longed to receive an e-mail from what could possibly be described as a spirit? No normal girl at least… though, she couldn't care less about that fact. She knew what was real and what wasn't real, and she had noticed that although her spirit world, like she liked to think about it, was real… where as many things in the human world weren't. There was no need to go into detail there, for just thinking about love in her own world made her sick. Love, money, power… all related; sick.

"My Haku," she whispered as she let her backpack fall from her back, shaking her head slightly once more, "You have no idea what love is, do you? No idea what it means…" she paused and frowned, "What does love mean?" she tilted her head, looking around her, almost as if expecting an answer straight away, yet again she waited vainly… no answer came, "Love is… what's love?" she really couldn't help but ask the stupid question again, frowning slightly as she went to turn on her computer, sitting down in her chair.

Chihiro awaited patiently till her screen flashed on, allowing her to access her e-mail.

No new mail in tray.

A soft sigh escaped her lips as she closed her eyes, trying to force tears back before turning to glare at her screen, "Baka… here I am waiting, what's taking so long?" slightly angry, she clicked into her tray, accessing the first and only mail she had gotten from Haku, "I won't wait anymore, I'm gonna reply," still glaring at the screen, she typed furiously at the keys, replying the e-mail he had first sent.

I've got a question for all ya out there... to whom ever this e-mail will reach…
What's love?
I think generations have tried to answer this question...
You think they've been able too?
I'll answer THAT question on my own; no, they haven't.


She reread what she had written so far and nodded to herself, silently wondering what was really irking her up so much as to write this. She was surprised to discover she did not know… really, she had no idea, for she wasn't the most appropriate person to talk about love at all. Her close friends normally teased her for not having any boyfriends too… not that she didn't want to, but, she felt so cold and empty when she knew she was going out with some other guy. It just didn't feel right, and she didn't care to identify why this was either.

I'll ask another question then...
What is it to know? To feel? To KNOW what it is you feel?
Ok, so shoot me, there's 3 questions, not one.
Say, so people normally know what it is they're feeling?
I dun think so, otherwise life wouldn't be so twisted.
Because believe me, it's twisted...


Yes it was. Life was twisted… Chihiro normally compared it with a long road, bent and curved, for you never know what may come up, much like one of those old trails you walk or hike. Life had allowed her the opportunity to go to a far new world, a world where she had meet wonderful friends, a world where she had meet him too… and still it got twisted, for after meeting them, there was no way she was ever able to go back to them. Such pity…

Heaven and hell, two different worlds,
But do they really exist?
It would really depend on how you'd describe these places,
If there's a hell, believe me, I've been there,
If there's a heaven, you can believe me again, I've also been there,
And there was no need for me to die to get to these places,
All it takes is a person willing to take you there...
Then is when I ask myself if this person knows not only how I'M feeling, but what he is feeling himself...


"Nah," she glared at her screen, about to change what she had written, for she already knew there were not only two worlds… there were many more than that. There had to be, right? If the spirit world and human world existed, then what kept other worlds from existing too? "Maybe all we do is live a dream and we're not even alive…" however, as she said that, a cool braze entered through her window, making her sigh, "Or maybe not," she felt, she could still remember his touch from so long ago… and that had not been a dream, she was sure of it.

Why do we have a heart if it can be so easily broken?
What's the use of trying to make things go this way or that in the meantime?
When does it all end? Or does it even END?
Where should I go if I'm lost inside my own soul?
Who'll be able to rescue me then?
How will it be done? Wasn't it an impossible task?


She could still wait, she was patient, it didn't matter yet, she'd look out for him still. He'd come back like he had done once before, "I waited for you," she whispered softly, all her anger evaporating as she closed her eyes, intent on finishing the writing and sending it, for suddenly she felt tired, just as if days had passed since she'd first sat on the computer.

And you'll live your life asking yourself questions no one will ever be able to answer,
But before I go, I'll ask one last one; why bother asking if you know no one will answer?
Yeah, I'll answer myself just for the sake of it; If you don't at least try... then... you'll die with a doubt 'would have this person or someone else, for that matter, been able to answer me?' you'll never know, and it'll be one more question you'll be asking yourself.


"That's but enough," she mumbled to herself as she clicked the send button, visibly shocked when the e-mail was sent to the person whom had first send her one despite the fact there was no address. She then silently shut down the computer and changed into a her pyjamas, letting herself drop on her bed, for she was very tired at the moment… she felt more tired than she had ever felt in her life for some reason.

It was only way later in the night that she dreamed… the cold wind gushing out of her window and into her room silently as she slept, enveloping her in a comfortable embrace… never letting her freeze, for although cold, it has something a keen to familiar to it, almost like a cold blanket when used on a warm summer night. It was dream like, as was the soft whispering she could almost swear she could hear, soothing and kind, as if talking to a loved one or a child. The win whispered once more, then died out, the feeling of its cool presence replaced by that of another presence, this one more familiar than the one before.

I said I'd come and I did… no need to worry anymore, I am here.

The words entered her sleeping mind, but registered in it as she cuddled her pillow closer. Maybe the voice was right… she wasn't alone, for how many girls had a spirit watching over her? She had one, she knew she had, and she also knew she wasn't making it up.

Chihiro sighed softly when she felt a soft touch upon her cheek, light and almost inexistent… but it was there, it was real, and it was warm. It was filled with love, and that made was what made her eyes fluster open only to be greeted by darkness. Silently, she sat up and looked around, trying to figure out what kind of a dream she had just lived through, but couldn't, "What? Haku?" she whispered softly, but again was answered by silence… the same silence that answered always when she talked to herself, but she didn't care.

It was only minutes later that she noticed that her computer screen was flashing. Hadn't she shut off the stupid machine before going to bed? She was sure she had… hadn't she? And so, she found herself rolling her eyes and getting out of bed, auburn hair ruffled from sleep and eyes visibly tired when she reached her screen.
You have unread mail.

She blinked and rubbed her eyes, then once more stared at the screen, blinking some more, "Mail?" she gulped and sat down on the chair, not caring to turn the lights on as she guided herself into her e-mail tray.
You have a total of 1 unread messages in tray.

Again she gulped, clicking on the unread mail, hoping she would read what it was she wanted to read, for it had been a week… all she had to do was reply to get new mail? It seemed so, for her eyes widened when the message opened up for her to see.

Yesterday was my nightmare... you were not beside me, I couldn't reach you…
Tomorrow will become my dream, as I'll never know if you'll be with me till the end... I can only hope for that,
Today is a reality for I have you here with me, I have returned and I'll never leave your side again.

~ Kohaku

It took all of Chihiro's will of heart to not cry like a little girl, for she realized that although she couldn't see him, he was there, she had doubted, but she was wrong… he was there still, always there… now the real question was, how to reach him?

~ - ~ - ~ - ~

DFA: Uh, yup ^^ end of chap *Does a V sign and winks* Ne, ne! How'd ya like? Good? Need to change something? ^^ Or any questions? *Grins* I'll be back…