Ding… dong… ding… dong…
Damn it! Who is it? Interrupting my sweet occasions with Fuji. Oh, yeah that Oishi. He said he will come at 9 o'clock sharp, but now its already 10.30 that baka. But, without him, I'll never work it out with Fuji. Thanks to both of them.
"Yeah, Oishi wait a sec…" Oishi opens the door and enters the room.
"Tezu, maybe its better if I go now, okay? I don't want to bother you and Oishi. Bye, Tezuka."
"Fuji, wait…"
"Ohayo, Tezuka! Umm… Fuji? You're here, too?" He was looking confused. So, it wasn't him? Well, maybe it was Eiji himself who set this up, but aren't they the golden pair? They always know when one of them is up to something.
"I was just leaving. Bye, Tezu see you later. And remember everything I said, okay?" *wink* He is just soooo…. Cute….
After Fuji left my house. "So… how about it?" *Oishi grinning*
"How bout what?" I gave him a cold look.
"Don't pretend you don't know." *grinning* "Of course about sweet, sweet Fuji-chan. What happened? Come on, Tezuka. We're buddies, right? Tell me."
"Mind your own business! Why don't you and Eiji just stop bothering bout me."
"Hey, you don't have to get pissed off, Pal. Chill off. We were just trying to help you. Come on, think about it, how would you feel if Fuji has a girlfriend or maybe a boyfriend? Maybe you'll just sulk all day or end up miserable. I'm your buddy, I don't want you to be like that." *tapping me on my shoulder*
"I never said I even cared if he's going out with someone. I don't care."
"Reaaallly? Who was the one freaking out when Fuji gets hurt? Anyway, it's so obvious, that sparkle in your eyes when you see him, he's the only one who can make you smile, right? Anyone can realize it, except both of you." *sly grin*
"Well… maybe… okay, I care a bit… just a little bit. Satisfied?" Shit, I could feel that my face is turning bright red. I can't help it.
"BWAHAHAHA… AT LAST TEZUKA KUNIMITSU ADMITTED THAT HE LIKES FUJI… BWAHAHAHA… Oishi, you're just so great…" *WHACK* "Hey, what's that for?"
"Shut up. You're noisy."
"Ooo… someone's blushing here." Damn brat, I really wanna kick his ass. I'm gonna get rid of him.
"Out." *pushing him out of my room* "Get out."
"Tezuka… Okay, I won't be noisy, promise…" *crossing his fingers*
"Shut up, now. What do you want? Talk."
"Okay." He looked serious. "Now that we know you love him and he…"
"I said I liked him, I didn't say that I love him."
"Baka, what's the difference? Like, love, care? It's all the same."
"No it's not. I love my Mum and Pops, I like you, but I don't love you. You see? It's different."
"Yeah, I see… Okay, let's say… You like, umm… care for him and we all know that he loves you so why don't you just say the magic words? Everything will be okay."
"Who said he loves me?" A tiny bit of me hoped that he wasn't joking.
"I did. You didn't hear me just now? Hehehe…" *grinning*
"Oishi. Stop playing around. Be serious. Who said that?"
"Fuji."
"What? Who? Fuji? When? Where? Why? How? Tell me, Oishi… Tell me… " *Shaking Oishi's shoulders*
"Hey, calm down…"
"Oishi, tell me… when did he say that he loves me?" *hoping*
"Every day."
"…" *Thinking* "I don't get it."
"Well, remember the last time I spent the night here? When I arrived you were receiving a call from him, and you said…"
"No, its just Oishi not to bother. Okay then, good night. Love you, too."
"Who was that, Tezu?"
"Oh, it was Fuji."
"He often calls you in the middle of the night like this?"
Hey, it's just 11, it's not late yet. Yeah, he always gives a buzz every night, if it's not him I do."
"…then, I realized you two are really close. You two always say those word, but you guys never realized it."
"…" *still thinking*
"Tezuka? You get what I mean?"
"Well, I never thought he really meant it. I thought he was referring to 'I care for you as friends' just like the other members of the teams. And…"
"He never says that to the other members. Only for you. He never said it to me. What if he means that he loves more than friends?"
"…" *Thinking deeply*
"Tezuka? Oh, it already 12 o'clock. I gotta go, have a date with Eiji." *smiles* He sees so happy. He's lucky; he can be with the one he loves.
"Oishi…"
"What?"
"Have you ever said to Eiji that you love him?"
"Well, I always do. Just hope he gets the right message." Walking out of my room.
"Ano… Oishi…"
"Nani?" Turning back.
"Umm… good luck."
*Smiles* "You, too. Good luck, Buddy."
There are words that you truly want to hear,
But you will never heed from those you sought to hear,
But listen with your heart,
Someone is telling it from the heart.
***
I wonder why time moves so fast? It's already Monday again. School again. Practice again. Met the guys again. And… met Fuji again.
What should I do? How should I act? Should I pretend that nothing happened? What if everything that Oishi said is right? Should I act like something DID happen? But, what if it didn't really mean anything to him? He never said that he loves me. Well… he did actually… But, what if…
"Ohayo, Tezuka! Cheer up, you look like you've been at a funeral." Eiji's joyful voice wakens me from my thoughts. "Oh, yeah. Tezuka, if you're looking for Fuji, he's in the class. Good luck, Captain!" *smiles*
"Who told you? Oishi? How much do you know? Everything?"
"Umm… Tezuka… ano… yeah… but, don't be mad at him, I was the one who forced him to tell me… I… I…" *sweatdrop*
"Eiji…"
"Ano… Tezuka… please don't be mad…" *sweatdrop*
"Thanks."
"Tezukapleaseforgivehimhe'snotguiltyifyouwanttopunishjustpunishme…" *babbling* *blink* "Umm… Nani?" *confused*
"Thank him for me." I walked towards Fuji's class, leaving a confused looking Eiji behind.
"…" *Confused blink*
***
"Hi, Taka." *Smile* He walked towards me. With the usual bashfully look on him.
"Fuji, I want to talk to you." While he said that something changed. He didn't look doubtful anymore. He looked so… confident?
"Go on." He pulled me up. And wrapped his arms around me. "Taka… I…" This made me so baffled. I don't understand what's going on.
"Fuji, I like you since the first time we met. But, just now I realized I love you. I want to be with you. I…" What? He said he loves me? It not like the first time someone says that they love me. A bunch of girls keep on chasing after me, but I don't know why I just don't feel like being with them. This is the first time a guy told me that he loves me. Somehow I feel… flattered? I don't know.
"Fuji… You don't have to answer me now. But, I need an answer. I'll never give up. Not to Tezuka. Not to anyone."
He kept on hugging me like he won't let go. It felt warm to be hugged like this, but it seemed to be different. Unlike the way Tezuka hugged me. How could I be like this? Taka's the one who is hugging me and I keep on thinking about Tezuka? How could I? I feel guilty.
"If you're thinking about Tezuka now, just give up. He doesn't love you." He… doesn't love me… I… I felt like my heart suddenly crumpled.
"He never admitted it to you, right? He's not a coward; if he loves you he sure had told you. But, he didn't did he?" Taka is right… he never said… that… my heart is aching. I know that I have a crush for him, who wouldn't? He's so cool. He's smart, brave after all he is our captain. He has everything a woman would need to like him… well, a man too… "He never told you that he loves you, right Fuji?" He holds me tighter.
"He doesn't tell you, because…" Kisses my forehead. 'Let go… don't do this… I won't let anyone kiss me except… Tezuka…' I want to run away. But, somehow I can't move. I feel trapped. "Because… he doesn't love you."
"I…" The words didn't seem to come out. I felt so sad. A tear rolled down my cheeks. I know that I would never compare to all those girls who keep going after him. I knew since long that I would've never have him. After all, I'm a man. And I know that he's straight. I know… I knew that he would never love me… What if he hates me after what I have done yesterday? What if he wouldn't see me again? What would I do?
"Don't cry, Fuji. Smile. You look beautiful when you smile. Don't think about him. I can give you the love more than you can imagine." Kissing away my tears.
"Fuji…" I heard that voice. The voice I love the most. There was mixed emotions in his eyes. Anger, hate, sadness, hurt, abandoned, betrayed all in one. He ran out of the classroom. He's sure going to hate me now.
"Tezuka, wait…" Don't hate me Tezuka… don't hate me… Please don't hate me…
It only needs one minute to break someone's heart,
One hour to like someone,
One day to love someone,
But, it needs a whole lifetime to forget about someone…
***
And remember everything I said…
And I just thought that you really love me. Fuji… I never knew that you were going out with Taka. I should have known. You're the closest one to him. I should have known. If I knew, then I wouldn't even hope that you'd love me. Fuji… But, why did you say all those words…
Sweet dreams, Tezuka. I love you, always…s
More ever, why… why did you kiss me? Why… Were you just playing around with my feelings? Were you…
I can stay as long as you want. What do you want now? Just name it…
My heart was throbbing… my eyes were stinging… No… I won't cry… Not for someone who doesn't even love me… Not for you Fuji Syusuke…
The most miserable thing in life
Is when you meet someone who means very much to you,
Just to find out that at the end it is meaningless…
***
"Tezuka…" I hugged him from behind. I don't know why, but I don't want to let go. I don't care of the people who begin to stare at us, after all this is at school. I don't care. I don't care for nothing at all. Nothing… For once in my life I felt so right.
"Fuji… don't touch me." He was glaring at me. He could see the anger in his eyes. But, there was somewhere in those eyes, I could see the sorrow, he felt betrayed. Maybe… maybe he does love me… maybe he does…
"I won't let you go." I kissed him on the lips. He looked stunned. "Tell me… that you don't love me… then I'll let you go." I held him tighter.
"Fuji… don't." He refused to look at my eyes. I put one of my hands on his chin and forced him to look in my eyes.
"Look at me, Tezuka. And tell me that you don't love me." I have to know the truth. Whether it's bad or good.
"Go back to your boyfriend. I don't touch me again." He pushed me away. And I felt that same ache in my heart, only this time it hurts even more.
"But, Tezuka he isn't my boyfriend. Let me explain. I didn't…"
"Don't lie to me again. I don't need your explanations. Everything is clear." He walked away. "I don't love you. I never did."
"Tezu… ka…" He left me just like that. I dropped down on my knees. Crying. He didn't even care to turn around. I got this strange feeling mixed up in my heart. Hurt. Sad. Anger. Regret. It hurt so badly, I couldn't even figure out how I felt. He didn't care for me. He didn't even care to turn around. He didn't want me. Didn't need me. Didn't even let me explain. He said he never loved me. Never did love me… Never…
***
"Eiji, are you busy now? I need to talk."
"Sure. I'll come to your house now."
"No, I'm already near your house. Wait for me, okay?" I caught something in his voice. He sounded sad? Strange. The 'always-smile-whatever-happens' Fuji could be sad? What could have made him sad? Or maybe who?
"Okay. See ya." This is odd. Fuji calls me first; usually if he wants to come he doesn't call first. Maybe it's something serious? Maybe something happened? Something bad? But, about what? Maybe something happened to the team members? Maybe... Oishi? I gotta call him now. Hope he's all right.
"Moshi moshi…" Please… tell me you're okay, Oishi…
"Hi, Eiji. What's up?" Oishi's voice…
"Thank God you're, okay. I was so worried." I feel so relieved. He is fine.
"Worried? Bout me? What happened?"
"Fuji called. It seems to be something serious. He sounded so sad."
"Stupid. If Fuji is sad, it mustn't have been about me. It must have been something about Tezuka, the person he cares the most. Why you thought it was about me?" *blush* Thank God this was on the phone, he couldn't see me blushing. *Sweat drop*
"…"
"Eiji… don't be embarrassed. If you're worried about me that means you care for me. It's all right. You know I care for you, too." *blush* "Eiji… even though this is on the phone I can sense it, you're blushing, right?"
"I… no, I'm not…" *blush again*
"Eiji… we know almost everything about each other. We have to be honest to each other, right? You promised me there would be no secrets between us. And I told you that I love you. So, why don't you just admit that you love me, too?"
"Oishhhhiiiii!!!" *blush*
"Come on Eiji… Be honest to me… tell me the truth… Anyway, Tezuka told me what you did this morning… so…"
Ding… dong… ding… dong…
"Fuji is here. Gotta go now. Bye, Oishi."
"Eiji… wait…" *hung up*
"Fuji… What's the matter?" He looked so sad.
"Eiji???" Somehow his sad face turned into a bright smile and he laughed… At me… "Eiji… hahaha… you look like… hahahaha… what happened? You're blushing… hahahaha… did you just do something embarrassing? Tell me… hahahaha…."
"I…" *blush* Well, I feel a bit embarrassed, but it's okay. Fuji can laugh like this, right now he really needs it. "I… ano… Oishi…"
"What are you talking about? I don't understand."
"Hey, you're the one who came here to talk. Why do I have to tell you this?"
"Okay, fine. I'll just go back home if you won't tell me." Standing up. Heading towards the door.
"Fuji, wait… fine… But, don't laugh. OishitoldmethathelovesmeandheinsistmetotellhimthatIlovehim,too. Satisfied?" Taking a deep breath after babbling all those words.
*Blink* It took a while to comprehend what Eiji's words meant. "Humfff… bwahahahahaha…. Oishi… hahahaha… Eiji… so what did you say? Hahahaha…"
"Then you came. I didn't answer, yet."
"But, if you did. What will you say?"
"I don't know. Maybe I would've said… Hey, this is not fair. It's your time to talk now."
"Okay." Then he told me everything about it. I felt sorry for him. If I could only tell him what Tezuka said to Oishi yesterday… But, I promised not to tell anyone…
"So… now we know that Tezuka is a complete idiot."
"But, if I was in his place I would've done the same thing. I only want to know if he really meant that he doesn't love me. Eiji… do you think he really hates me?"
Poor Fuji… Well, I can't tell him that Tezuka loves him… so… I'll just give him a clue. "Do you love him?"
"Well… I guess so…"
"Then, fight for him. Win his love. I'm sure you'll get him. You're better than those girls. Don't give up. Just like Taka, he won't give up because he loves you. You love Tezuka, right? Then don't give up. Don't ever say goodbye if you still want to try. Don't ever give up if you still can strive. Don't ever deny that you love him, if you cant let him go. Believe me. Love will find a way. Sure that's right. If not they won't make a song about it." (You know the 'Love will find a way' song, don't you? Lion King II's OST)
"Eiji…" *hugs me* Oh, God, Tezuka is going to kill me if he sees this. "Sometimes you are just so… wise… Thanks…" Then he ran off. And left me in a complete confused state. Well, at least he's a bit cheered up now.
"Wise? Really? Am I?" I felt too thrilled to realize that someone came into my room.
"Let's see if you're wise enough to admit that you love me" Oishi hugged me form behind.
"OISHIIII!!!!!!!" Caressing my cheek. "Oishi…" He nibbles on my ear. "Oishhiiiiiii…." Kissing away down my neck. "Oiiii… shiiii…"
"I love you… Eiji… say it… say: 'I love you, Master'…"
"Umm…" He slid one of his hands behind my shirt. His hands moved making patterns.
"Say… I love you… not ummm… say it…" I kissed him on the lips with a tender kiss. He looked dazed for a moment. Then he smiled. "Well, I'll take that as an 'I love you'. Say it again, Eiji… Or… do it again… up to you… You are just so great, Eiji… No… you're so… wise…" We deepened the kiss. And he pushed me on the bed. Starting to unbutton my shirt. That's when I realized we still have a problem here.
"Baka! It's not time for this! We still have a problem. How bout Fuji and Tezuka? What are we gonna do about them?"
"Okay, I'll try to talk to Tezuka. Before I came here, I called him and he sounded very, very mad. But, I'll try… for my sweet Eiji… After everything is all right… lets continue this, okay… Eiji… Darling…"
"Get off of me! You pervert!" *blush*
***
Two cool guys met at the Bishonen Café and both of them looked angry at one another. (Taka is in his 'burning' state, so… Tezuka you better watch out…)
"Leave him alone. You don't love him. Don't hurt him anymore."
"Who the f*ck are you? Tellin' me that I don't love him?"
"You're the one who said that, this morning… After breaking his heart like that. You don't love him. But, I do."
"But, he doesn't love you, even though you're his boyfriend." 'Shit. I hate to recall this fact. The fact that Fuji is his… not mine…'
"That's why you have to leave him alone. He is mine." 'So… he thought that Fuji is my boyfriend… good… he saw us in the complete wrong time and wrong place… well, right for me… bad for him… poor Tezuka… Let me torture you a bit more…' "I don't care about your feelings. It ain't important to me. Fuji is the only one important to me. And I'm here just to tell you, I will never give up until Fuji loves me. Never give up. Unless Fuji himself tells me that he loves someone else."
"Okay, lets be fair. Let Fuji decide who he loves."
"That's fine with me. I'm sure gonna win. I'm not the one who made him cry. Maybe he hates you already now…"
"Shut up. Let Fuji decide what he wants." Then the taller man left the café completely pissed off.
"I think… I'll win this time Tezuka…" *evil smile*
***
I've decided to tell Tezuka how much I love him… But, he is absent today. I looked for him everywhere. What should I do now? I looked for him at his house, but his Mom said that he's not home. Where is he? And… this is Christmas Eve… I hoped that this Christmas would've been different. I thought that I would be with him… But, he hates me… I feel so miserable…
I don't know how long, how far I walked… But, when I realized I was back at school. Facing the changing room. I don't know what brought me here. I saw a card in front of my locker. I picked it up. 'To Fuji' this writing… it's his…
Fuji, I'm sorry for everything.
Maybe you hate me by now, I won't blame you
It's all my fault. Now it's your choice.
Who do you choose?
"Tezuka…" I opened the door and it was still snowing outside. I walked out and I saw him standing in the middle of the tennis court. He turned around and he smiled at me.
"I told you… you look handsome when you smile…"
"Answer my question." *smile*
"I… want… all that I want… all that I've ever wanted…" I kissed him, this time I'll never let him go. Never. Not that now I know he loves me. Kunimitsu Tezuka is mine forever. (Possessive brat…) "Is you…"
"Come on, let's go home. You'll catch a cold." We walked hand in hand. And something tells me that this time it will be forever. No lonelier Christmas. Now I have him beside me.
A best friend is when you can stay and feel sheltered,
Yet saying nothing,
Hand by hand together always…
***
The two didn't realize that someone… umm… three actually… were watching them…
"I lost." Kawamura walked away to the opposite direction of the couple.
"Taka, you gave up just like that? You said you love him?"
He turned around to face the golden pair. "Eiji… sometimes… to love someone means to let them be with the ones they love." Then he walked away again.
"Oishi… I don't understand what he means." Holding Oishi's hand.
"Eiji… Giving all your love to someone doesn't assures that he will love you back… He lets Fuji gains his own happiness..."
"Then… Taka must've really love Fuji, right?"
"I guess so…" Circling his arms around Eiji's waist.
"Oishi… I love you…"
"Me, too… But, Eiji… we still have some unfinished business… ummm… in your room…" *mischievous smile*
"OISHIIIII!!!!! Pervert!!!!!"
***
Love is taking one another just as they are,
And making them feel like a bright shining star.
Love is knowing what the other one needs,
Showing you care with kind words and deeds.
The poetry are written by: @rie$
The End