Disclaimer: Characters owned by Nintendo
Field Day
By Li Kenta
Chapter 2
Li: Hey guys.
Link: You again, one chapter of toture wasn't enough.
Li: TOTURE!!!? Ganondorf was nailed in the balls and the Demon of all fish has the hots for
me and your saying you're being tortured?!
Zelda: (Blinks a few times) You have a flair for the dramatic don't?
Li: Oh yeah.
Ganondorf: YOU!!!
(Suddenly Ganondorf comes by walking in a painful manner.)
Ganondorf: Because of you, ouch, my boys, oww, are in this situation.
Li: Don't blame me, blame Link.
Link: Hey, I...
Li: Used a cheap shot, we know.
Ganondorf: Anyway, can't you do anything, I mean, you are the author.
Li: No.
Ganondorf: What, why not?
Li: I don't like you.
Ganondoef: Give one good reason for not liking me.
Li: Well *deep breath* your evil, your ugly, you insult red-heads every where, your a dumbass, your
full of hot air, you insult the Triforce of Power by being such a weakling...
Two Hours Later...
(Link and Zelda playing cards)
Link: Which reason is he on?
Zelda: I lost count at the fifty-seventh, two cards.
(Zelda's eyes widen, with a chuckle she places her cards down.)
Zelda: A Royal Flush.
Link: Damn.
Li: ...Your breath stinks, you smell in general and finally I find the situation that your in is quite
funny.
Ganondorf:...
Link: You're finished?
Li: Yeah Link, I'm...
(Akward silence falls, as Li looks at Link with nothing but his pant underalls on,)
Li: Care to explain.
Zelda: I've been beating him in poker, and last thing I want is those underalls.
Li: NO WAY!!! *snaps fingers* no nudity in this fic.
Zelda: Oh, your no fun.
Li: First of all, you see him naked five nights a weak, and that's not counting weekends,
second the rating is as high as I want it to be.
Ruto: LIIII!!! DARLING!!!
(Ruto hugs Li, and gives him a kiss.)
Li: NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
(Li runs of at lightning speed.)
Ruto: Li come back!!
(After contemplating the situation, Zelda asks Link.)
Zelda: So, what happens now?
Link: We find Li.
Zelda What? I thought you would be happy to see him go.
Link: I would, but with out the fic doesn't end, meaning, we'll have to entetain those 'people' *points at reader*
for the rest of our lives. No offense.
Three hours later...
Link: Anything?
Zelda: Nothing.
Ruto: Li, where are you?
Link:...Ruto, um, I think I saw Li going towards the volcanic crater at Death Mountain.
Ruto: Really? Then I'll go their in search of my lost love.
(Link waves good-bye, and then sighs with relief.)
Ganondorf: Why you do that she was the most persistent of us all.
Link: Listen, as of right now Li is terrified of that fish and seeing her would add tons of damage to his already
shattered pysche. To be blunt, He see's Ruto again he's going to have a mental meltdown.
(Out of no where they hear rustling. Link searches the bush only to find Li curled up in ball.)
Li: So scared, so violated, so scared, so violated, so scared, so violated...
Zelda: I think the damage is to great for us to do anything.
(They hear a horse, the group turns around to Malon, riding towards them.)
Malon: Hey guys, what's up?
Link: Li had a mental and emotional meltdown.
(Malon looks over at Li, still in a ball, still repeating the words 'so scared, so violated'.)
Malon: It was Ruto wasn't?
Link: Yup, how'd you guess?
Malon: She is the only person that struck fear in into the heart of the holder of the Troforce of Courage.
Zelda: Well, that's true.
Malon: I think I can help him.
Zelda: How?
Malon: He needs to hear the voice and see the face of a pretty girl.
All:...(Except Ganondorf who's laughing his ass of.)
Ganondorf: Zelda, she burned you badly!!!
Zelda: Are saying...You little...
Link: As much as I want to see a cat-fight between you two, we need to help Li. Oh, if you still want
to fight after Li's is healed, go ahead, it might even help in his healing process.
Malon: *backing away* I'll help Li.
45 minutes later...
Malon: He's okay!!
(The trio looked up to see Li walking towards them.)
Link: Wait, where's Malon?
(Li points behind him, a scared Malon seeking his protection from Zelda.)
Li: She's a bit scared, you know with Zelda looking at with fire and darkness in her eyes.
Link: Stop protecting her, theirs going to be cat fight.
Li: *hangs head low* Malon already said if I don't protect her, she'll tell Ruto where I live.
Ganondorf: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!
Li: Shut up, perv boy.
Link: Perv boy?
Li:(Seeing this as a prime moment to hurt Ganondorf) Oh, Ganondorf put camera's in...
Ganondorf: STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!!!!!!!!!
Li: *Evil grin* in Zelda shower.
(Suddenly, the sky turns black, Ganondorf looks at the sky in confusion. That is until he hears a growl,
Link's holding the thing that has haunted his dreams, the Megaton Hammer.)
Ganondorf: *screaming like a little girl* NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
(A chase insues ending up with the King of Pussies, backed up against a wall by Link and Zelda.)
Li: Well this worked out well.
Malon: how so?
Li: Ruto's gone, my mind's intact and Ganon'dork' is about to by pummeled into the ground.
(Ganondorf thought furiously for away to escape unharmed, then it hit him. He cast a barrier around himself,
despite Links assualt it held.)
Ganondorf: Ha ha. *sticks tongue out*
(Furious, Link attempted one more swing, fortunatlly it broke through. The hammer's point of impact Ganondorf's
head...while his tongue was out.)
Malon: OWWW!!
Li: I'm suprised he still has a tongue.
(While the two are talking our favorite couple procedes to beat the shit out of Ganondorf.)
Li: Hmm.
Malon: What?
Li: Two chapter's and in both Ganondorf's been nailed by Link's hammer.
(Without warning Malon kiss' Li on his cheek.)
Li *blushing* What was that for?
Malon: For getting Zelda so pissed off, she completly forgot about me.
Li: *regaining composure* Well it's about time we ended this.
(Li is about end the chapter when an ebnchanting aroma filled his nose.)
Li and Malon: Mmmm...fish.
Li: Gotta end this fast.
Malon: Why?
Li: I want Ganondorf alive for the next chapter.
A/N: Well that's the end of chapter two, hope you liked. Also thank you for the reviews, well time to say good-...
Ruto: Li!!
Li: I was never here, you never saw me and if anyone tells I will hunt them down and shove my katana up their ass.
(Li splits in time to avoid a barbecued Ruto.)
Ruto: *to reader* Have you seen Li?
Reader, You: He's at...umm...Dodongo Cavern.
Field Day
By Li Kenta
Chapter 2
Li: Hey guys.
Link: You again, one chapter of toture wasn't enough.
Li: TOTURE!!!? Ganondorf was nailed in the balls and the Demon of all fish has the hots for
me and your saying you're being tortured?!
Zelda: (Blinks a few times) You have a flair for the dramatic don't?
Li: Oh yeah.
Ganondorf: YOU!!!
(Suddenly Ganondorf comes by walking in a painful manner.)
Ganondorf: Because of you, ouch, my boys, oww, are in this situation.
Li: Don't blame me, blame Link.
Link: Hey, I...
Li: Used a cheap shot, we know.
Ganondorf: Anyway, can't you do anything, I mean, you are the author.
Li: No.
Ganondorf: What, why not?
Li: I don't like you.
Ganondoef: Give one good reason for not liking me.
Li: Well *deep breath* your evil, your ugly, you insult red-heads every where, your a dumbass, your
full of hot air, you insult the Triforce of Power by being such a weakling...
Two Hours Later...
(Link and Zelda playing cards)
Link: Which reason is he on?
Zelda: I lost count at the fifty-seventh, two cards.
(Zelda's eyes widen, with a chuckle she places her cards down.)
Zelda: A Royal Flush.
Link: Damn.
Li: ...Your breath stinks, you smell in general and finally I find the situation that your in is quite
funny.
Ganondorf:...
Link: You're finished?
Li: Yeah Link, I'm...
(Akward silence falls, as Li looks at Link with nothing but his pant underalls on,)
Li: Care to explain.
Zelda: I've been beating him in poker, and last thing I want is those underalls.
Li: NO WAY!!! *snaps fingers* no nudity in this fic.
Zelda: Oh, your no fun.
Li: First of all, you see him naked five nights a weak, and that's not counting weekends,
second the rating is as high as I want it to be.
Ruto: LIIII!!! DARLING!!!
(Ruto hugs Li, and gives him a kiss.)
Li: NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
(Li runs of at lightning speed.)
Ruto: Li come back!!
(After contemplating the situation, Zelda asks Link.)
Zelda: So, what happens now?
Link: We find Li.
Zelda What? I thought you would be happy to see him go.
Link: I would, but with out the fic doesn't end, meaning, we'll have to entetain those 'people' *points at reader*
for the rest of our lives. No offense.
Three hours later...
Link: Anything?
Zelda: Nothing.
Ruto: Li, where are you?
Link:...Ruto, um, I think I saw Li going towards the volcanic crater at Death Mountain.
Ruto: Really? Then I'll go their in search of my lost love.
(Link waves good-bye, and then sighs with relief.)
Ganondorf: Why you do that she was the most persistent of us all.
Link: Listen, as of right now Li is terrified of that fish and seeing her would add tons of damage to his already
shattered pysche. To be blunt, He see's Ruto again he's going to have a mental meltdown.
(Out of no where they hear rustling. Link searches the bush only to find Li curled up in ball.)
Li: So scared, so violated, so scared, so violated, so scared, so violated...
Zelda: I think the damage is to great for us to do anything.
(They hear a horse, the group turns around to Malon, riding towards them.)
Malon: Hey guys, what's up?
Link: Li had a mental and emotional meltdown.
(Malon looks over at Li, still in a ball, still repeating the words 'so scared, so violated'.)
Malon: It was Ruto wasn't?
Link: Yup, how'd you guess?
Malon: She is the only person that struck fear in into the heart of the holder of the Troforce of Courage.
Zelda: Well, that's true.
Malon: I think I can help him.
Zelda: How?
Malon: He needs to hear the voice and see the face of a pretty girl.
All:...(Except Ganondorf who's laughing his ass of.)
Ganondorf: Zelda, she burned you badly!!!
Zelda: Are saying...You little...
Link: As much as I want to see a cat-fight between you two, we need to help Li. Oh, if you still want
to fight after Li's is healed, go ahead, it might even help in his healing process.
Malon: *backing away* I'll help Li.
45 minutes later...
Malon: He's okay!!
(The trio looked up to see Li walking towards them.)
Link: Wait, where's Malon?
(Li points behind him, a scared Malon seeking his protection from Zelda.)
Li: She's a bit scared, you know with Zelda looking at with fire and darkness in her eyes.
Link: Stop protecting her, theirs going to be cat fight.
Li: *hangs head low* Malon already said if I don't protect her, she'll tell Ruto where I live.
Ganondorf: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!
Li: Shut up, perv boy.
Link: Perv boy?
Li:(Seeing this as a prime moment to hurt Ganondorf) Oh, Ganondorf put camera's in...
Ganondorf: STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!!!!!!!!!
Li: *Evil grin* in Zelda shower.
(Suddenly, the sky turns black, Ganondorf looks at the sky in confusion. That is until he hears a growl,
Link's holding the thing that has haunted his dreams, the Megaton Hammer.)
Ganondorf: *screaming like a little girl* NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
(A chase insues ending up with the King of Pussies, backed up against a wall by Link and Zelda.)
Li: Well this worked out well.
Malon: how so?
Li: Ruto's gone, my mind's intact and Ganon'dork' is about to by pummeled into the ground.
(Ganondorf thought furiously for away to escape unharmed, then it hit him. He cast a barrier around himself,
despite Links assualt it held.)
Ganondorf: Ha ha. *sticks tongue out*
(Furious, Link attempted one more swing, fortunatlly it broke through. The hammer's point of impact Ganondorf's
head...while his tongue was out.)
Malon: OWWW!!
Li: I'm suprised he still has a tongue.
(While the two are talking our favorite couple procedes to beat the shit out of Ganondorf.)
Li: Hmm.
Malon: What?
Li: Two chapter's and in both Ganondorf's been nailed by Link's hammer.
(Without warning Malon kiss' Li on his cheek.)
Li *blushing* What was that for?
Malon: For getting Zelda so pissed off, she completly forgot about me.
Li: *regaining composure* Well it's about time we ended this.
(Li is about end the chapter when an ebnchanting aroma filled his nose.)
Li and Malon: Mmmm...fish.
Li: Gotta end this fast.
Malon: Why?
Li: I want Ganondorf alive for the next chapter.
A/N: Well that's the end of chapter two, hope you liked. Also thank you for the reviews, well time to say good-...
Ruto: Li!!
Li: I was never here, you never saw me and if anyone tells I will hunt them down and shove my katana up their ass.
(Li splits in time to avoid a barbecued Ruto.)
Ruto: *to reader* Have you seen Li?
Reader, You: He's at...umm...Dodongo Cavern.
