Immortality

By: Lindsay

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: The Telling

Disclaimer: Sadly, Alias and its characters do not belong to me. I wish Michael Vartan did, but that's another story.

'Ship: S/V

Summary: Post-"The Telling"- Vaughn attempts to come to terms with death and loss.

A/N: I realize that I'm not an amazing writer, but I'd still like your constructive feedback! This chapter is just sort of an intro. The whole "immortality" thing comes in later. For those of you who have read this already, I've changed the ending to better fit my ideas.

Chapter 1: My Hate for Telephones

I hate telephones. The sound of the ringing, the sound of the voice on the other end, the information given, or lack thereof. But I have never (I repeat: NEVER) have hated a phone call quite as much as the one I received that night

I was watching a King's game on my couch with Donovan and a beer- of course wishing I was with Sydney. My cell rang. Everyone disregards that I even have a home phone line anymore. I just don't get it. Hoping that I would be Syd, I looked at the ID. Of course not. I was never that lucky. It was Kendall. Oh yay.

"Vaughn."

"Agent Vaughn, you are to report to Agent Sydney Bristow's apartment immediately," he said blankly.

"What's up?" It was kind of a weird place for everyone to meet, after all.

"Agent Vaughn," he said much more sternly, "you are to report to Agent Bristow's apartment immediately." My stomach fell to my toes. Something was obviously wrong, but I felt like it was much more than a lead on Sloane. Without even turning off the TV, I muttered a 'yes sir,' grabbed my keys, and flew out the door.

I've gotten my share of speeding tickets in my life, but I have never driven faster. Thank God I wasn't pulled over; I probably would've exploded. My knuckles were turning white, sweat was dripping down my wrinkled forehead, my heart was thumping in my throat. Somehow, I got to her house without killing anyone.

The parking lot was teeming with vans and polices cars. The flashing lights hurt my eyes. And it was noisy. I know this, not because I could hear, but because it looked like it. I felt like I was back in Taipei, drowning, looking through the window. Every little noise muffled as if I was in a bubble. But this time I didn't see Sydney. I saw Devlin, Weiss, Jack, Marshall, Dixon, and Kendall yelling at some cop. But no Sydney.

When I was younger, I had this strange fear of bugs. With age, I grew out of it, but at 5, I was scared to death of them. One time, there was an enormous spider in our bathtub. But, instead of screaming, I felt light- headed. The next thing I knew, my mother was kneeling over me, checking my pulse.

This just didn't compare.

Weiss saw me. His usual devious expression was gone. He didn't wave, didn't motion me out of the car. But it looked as though someone had stomped on his heart a few too many times.

I really didn't want to get out of the car.

Kendall's head was shimmering from the red and blue flashing lights. Even he looked somber in his strange, ass hole way.

I didn't want to get out of the car. Didn't want to see.

Marshall was sobbing into a handkerchief. Dixon looked as though he was going to kill someone.

I always believed that the day Jack Bristow cries was the day that hell freezes over.

Hell had frozen over.

I didn't want to get out of the car. Didn't want to see. Didn't want to know why Jack Bristow, man of steel, was crying.

But I got out of the car. I made my way into the apartments, into her door. I pushed passed the investigators. There was blood everywhere, lacing broken furniture and glass.

I looked everywhere, but I couldn't find Sydney. The kitchen, the bedroom, the bathroom. No Sydney. Where the hell was Sydney? Why the hell was there blood painting the walls of her apartment? And why the hell wasn't anyone telling me what was going on? I felt the anger burning into the walls of my stomach. My teeth ground and my throat hardened. My ears began to ring, fiercely, as though an alarm was going off. I felt as though I was going to throw up my insides.

"Shit!" I exploded. A couple agents looked at me as though I were nuts. "Shit! Where the hell is Weiss?"

One of the agents pointed over to the door with a sad look on his face.

I stormed over to him and yelled, "What the hell is going on here? Why isn't anyone telling me what the hell is going on here?"

"Let's go outside, Vaughn."

And that's when I broke down.

[I]TBC[/I] ________