Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, the ship, or anything at all.

Chapter 26 – Friendship

The Captain had retired to her quarters with a headache, the truth was she couldn't cope with having dinner with Voyager's guests, she couldn't watch someone else play mother to her daughter it hurt too much. It only served to make her realise what she gave up all those years ago, what she gave up and they took.

If she truly admitted it to herself she was afraid, afraid she was too late, afraid Elizabeth already had a mother and didn't need her. She wanted to believe she was just being paranoid, but she had sensed it as soon as they had arrived, Deanna had taken her place at Elizabeth's side.

She sighed, resting her head against the cool glass of the viewport. Just as she had told Elizabeth, opened her heart to her, Elizabeth had turned away, turned to someone else. Last night the two of them had been so close, but now she felt that they couldn't be further apart.

She went over the events of the afternoon in her mind; she had shown Admiral Paris around Voyager as she had promised. She had been disappointed when Elizabeth hadn't joined them, instead preferring to catch up with Deanna Troi. The Admiral appeared to understand her pain – he didn't speak on anything but Voyager and its crew on the tour. After the tour Kathryn had excused herself from dinner, and fled to the sanctuary of her quarters.

Now, here she was sat alone in her quarters drinking another cup of coffee. Suddenly she heard the doorbell ring, bringing her out of her wallowing. She sighed, wondering whether or not to ignore it.

"Come in," she said, hoping against hope it might be Elizabeth.

Chakotay entered, his face a mask of worry and understanding.

"Kathryn," he whispered sitting down next to her on the sofa.

"Chakotay, I'm going to lose her, again, aren't I?" she said, quietly as though it were written in stone.

"I don't know, Kathryn. I know how much she cares about you though," he said gently.

She put her coffee cup down on the table with a clank, "Not as much as she cares for them, eh Chakotay," she stated. She knew she was being selfish, expecting Elizabeth to spend time with her, who she had been with for the last few days, rather than spend time with the people who she had grown up loving, the people who until today had thought she was dead.

"I don't know, but if you hide away in here you'll never find out. She was worried when you didn't turn up tonight, she missed you," he said, drawing on the good things. He saw the Captain smile sadly.

"I missed her too. I'm so scared, Chakotay. She's everything to me, my biggest achievement. Now, just as I have her with me again I'm going to lose her, " she said, tears trickling down her cheeks.

"You don't know that," he said, taking her small hand in his large one. Chakotay was just pleased to have his friend back, pleased she opened up to him, and hopeful that he would be able to help her.

"Where is she now?" she asked, wiping at the tears ferociously.

"She's with the others. They had just finished the main course when I left. She wanted to come with me, but I persuaded her to stay," he said quietly, wondering if she would be angry with him.

It seemed she had barely noticed what he had said, she stood up straightened her uniform and steeled herself for what she might have to witness, and strode out the door. Chakotay smiled, slightly surprised at how easy it had been to talk her around. He stood up and followed her out the door.

They arrived in the mess hall to find everyone finishing their desserts off. As soon as they walked in, Elizabeth stood up and went to the Captain, hugging her tightly. She felt guilty about early she hadn't meant to leave the Captain out, but she knew that's how the Captain felt, and she was going to do her best to rectify the situation. She had hoped that the Captain and Deanna would become friends, but she doubted that now, she could see how much Deanna being here hurt her, but she couldn't just stop loving Deanna just because the Captain was jealous.

"I need to talk to you later," she whispered into the Captains ear.

The Captain nodded, she felt sick to the bottom of her stomach - terrified Elizabeth was going to tell her she was leaving.

Deanna had been the one to tell Elizabeth of her mother's fears; she had sensed them almost immediately. Elizabeth was worried now, she wished she didn't have to choose, she knew now that whatever choice she made would have a deep impact, perhaps irreparable impact on both sides.

She took the Captains hand, and led her to the seat in between her and Tom. Elizabeth was pleased with the progress Tom and their father was making. She hadn't seen them get on this well in years; she hoped they managed to work out their differences before her father left.

The meal carried on amicably, everyone seemed to be relatively happy as far as Elizabeth could see. She looked around the table, the Captain and Chakotay were discussing something or other, as was her father and Tom, and then there was Deanna and herself, Deanna was telling her everything that had been happening on the Enterprise.

A little while later, everyone had finished their meals, Chakotay had been the first to excuse himself and turn in for the night, followed by Deanna who had given Elizabeth a quick hug before leaving, the Captain had seen but managed to swallow her feelings. Admiral Paris left after giving Elizabeth a hug, and making her promise she wouldn't be long. One of his first requests on arriving had been that Elizabeth and he share quarters for the duration of his stay, both the Captain and Commander had agreed to this.

Tom was the last to leave, after a few minutes of conversation he left giving Elizabeth a quick hug on the way out. This left Elizabeth and the Captain alone in the mess hall.

Elizabeth felt a little uncomfortable, but she knew she had to tell the Captain how she felt. The Captain seemed to know that she was fighting herself, because she pulled her into a hug.

"So, what is it you want to talk about?" she asked, hoping she didn't sound as afraid as she felt.

"Well," Elizabeth paused, before rushing on, "I want you to know that I love, and respect you for what you did," she said quietly, pausing before adding, "mom."

This last word appeared to affect the Captain more than anything else Elizabeth had thought it might. The captain closed her eyes, and swallowed hard.

"Thank you sweetheart, I love you more than anything," she whispered her voice thick with emotion, as she looked Elizabeth straight in the eyes.

The Captain held Elizabeth to her tightly, whilst blinking away the tears that were threatening to overflow. Both of them had been affected deeply by one another's heartfelt words.

-Fin-

Please review, not long to go now. A couple more chapters I think.