Just My Luck
By: Dark_T-K
TK: "Hi everyone and welcome to another DBZ Humor. I finally got another idea and decided to put it into words."
Pan: "I could have done a story ya know. I'm your co-host. I did help you get the idea." {glares at T-K}
Videl: "She could have said a lot of things Pan. Things that weren't very nice!"
TK: "Thank you Videl. Oh right. This is Videl, the newest addition to the DBZ Humor staff. So give her a warm welcome and treat her right!" {audience claps}
Gohan: {from off stage} "Or just whistle and give her cat calls!"
TK/Videl/Pan: "Gohan!"
Pan: "If Trunks pulled a stunt like that he'd wouldn't walk for a week!"
TK: "Gohan would never pull that kind of stunt with me cause he's very nice, considerate, smart-"
Videl: {cuts off TK} "Not everyone can have a perfect boyfriend TK. We're not all that lucky."
Pan: "Hey Now! Trunks is the perfect boy friend."
TK: "More or less the perfect boy toy…" {Videl snickers}
Pan: "What! He is not!"
Videl: "You should talk TK. I saw what Goku did to you awhile ago. You can't say she gets all the loony boy toys."
Pan: {growls angrily}
TK: "I like Goku's ferocity. Just goes to show how bad Trunks and Vegeta can't measure up to Goku or his sons!" {audience claps}
Videl: "I resent that TK! Vegeta is just as good as Goku! Even better!"
Pan: "Marai has always been better than Goku!"
TK: {sweat drops} "If they are so great, then why is Vegeta with Bulma and Marai flirting with that blonde bimbo over there?" {points off stage. Camera turns to Trunks."
Pan: "TRUNKS MARAI BRIEFS! You little player!"
Trunks: "Ack! Pan! I was just talking! Honestly!"
Pan: {stomps off stage and grabs Trunks} "Tell it to the judge, or better yet, to someone who cares!" {pulls Trunks on to the stage by his ear}
Trunks: "Ouch! Oh! Ah!"
TK: "He deserved it."
Videl: "I know."
{ultra_gohan walk on to the set}
ultra_gohan: Hey TK! Videl! Pan…Trunks……" {sweat drops at Pan and Trunks}
Pan: "Gohan…" {glares then smacks Trunks}
Trunks: {groans miserably}
ultra_gohan: {Whispers to TK and Videl} "Let me guess. Pan caught him flirting again?"
TK/Videl: {nod} "Yup."
ultra_gohan: "I thought so. He never quits."
TK: {snickers evilly} "You should talk. You never do either."
Videl: {laughing out loud rolling on the floor laughing}
ultra_gohan: "And that's a bad thing?" {raises a brow}
TK: "Not entirely. I actually enjoy the attention."
Pan: {sits down and crosses arms} "Why I oughta!"
Trunks: {sits down nervously} "Heh…"
TK: "I think we should get started with the story summery. Umm…Videl would you like to read it tonight?" {holds out summery}
Videl: "Sure…ok. Here we go. Vegeta, stepping into an untested machine Bulma had just invented, and is transformed into a cat! Unfortunately the only one who knows he's a cat is Bulma. Bulma calls Goku over to help but then Goku takes Vegeta home as a new pet. Will Vegeta get back to normal? Or will the saiyan prince become a pet to a third class baka?"
ultra_gohan: "Nice way to say Goku! I'm impressed."
TK: "You should be. I got that idea from you."
Pan/Videl: {rolling on the floor laughing}
TK: "Speaking of Goku and Veggie, where are those two?"
Trunks: "You have to ask?"
TK: "Good point. What was it about this time?"
Pan: "Who's son is stronger? Who can eat the most? And is Goku a bakayaro or not?"
Videl: "Interesting subjects. Too bad we all know the answers."
TK: "Trunks is the strongest, and Goten is the best. Goku by far can eat more. And yes Goku is a bakayaro."
ultra_gohan: "I'm not strong?" {sends death glare to TK}
TK: {sweat drops} "You're strong Gohan! It's just I like Goku's clone more cause he looks like Goku!"
Trunks: "More or less he acts like Goku." {Pan hits the back of his head} "Oww! What was that for?!"
Pan: "Don't start more trouble! You're in enough as it is!"
Videl: "I think it's time to start the story! You agree TK?"
TK: "Yeah. Gohan?"
ultra_gohan: "It's for the best."
TK: "Alright then. Let the show begin!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Onna! Darn it onna! Where the heck are you?" Vegeta screamed out throughout the house looking for Bulma. Vegeta stomped around C.C. looking around for Bulma. "Why do I bother looking?! I know where she is! She's in her blasted lab! Again!" Vegeta shouted as he headed for Bulma's. He then stubbed his toe on a corner. "Ouch!"
"Hey dad! Looking for mom?" Trunks said as he slide down the railing. Vegeta turned to Trunks and growled angrily. "Sheesh dad, don't bite my head off. I was only asking." Vegeta rolled his eyes.
"If you must know, I am. Now go away and play with that…kaka-spawn." Vegeta snarled as he opened the door to the lab and slammed it shut. Trunks stood there dumbfounded.
"Guess dad broke the G.R. again. That's the only time he acts like he has a major wedgie." Trunks trotted off to find Goten.
"Onna I know you're down here! You better come out before I blast these inventions into another dimension!" Vegeta shouted out. Vegeta walked by then banged his head on a low hanging pipe. "Ouch! Err. Why am I having all the bad luck today?" Bulma rolled out from under a machine making Vegeta scream.
"You called Oujo?" Bulma said dryly. Vegeta jumped down from the rafters and recomposed himself.
"Scratch that, my life is bad luck. Yes I was onna. The--"
"The Gravity Room broke down again and you want me to drop everything I'm doing to help you." Bulma said in a flat tone. Vegeta nodded.
"Very perceptive of you Bulma. Now get to it. I have to train so I can pound Kakarott into the ground." Vegeta said pointing to the door. Bulma rolled her eyes.
"Sorry Vegeta. It will have to wait. I'm fixing the transmografier right now so you'll have to wait." Vegeta stood there confused.
"Transmogra-whater?" Vegeta asked. Bulma shook her head. Why do I bother to tell him.
"My transmografier Vegeta. It's my latest invention. It transforms things into something else. Unfortunately I haven't tested it." Yet. Vegeta will be the guinea pig for this experiment. Vegeta gave Bulma a skeptical look.
"I don't care if it's a planet saving machine. Get to work on my G.R. right now women! If you don't…I'll-"Vegeta thought for a moment. "I'll send Trunks into the future and makes sure he never comes back! Vegeta snapped. Bulma sighed and rolled out from under the TM.
"Like you could. If it will get you off my back I'll do it." Bulma said flatly. Vegeta smirked proudly.
"I could, but since you decided to cooperate I'll spare the brat. Now get to fixing my G.R. now!" Vegeta spat.
"Alright Vegeta. You got your point through. You stay here and keep an eye on my TM. Do that right and I'll fix the G.R." Bulma walked upstairs while Vegeta looked at the TM. He walked around the machine. Vegeta was about to push a button when…
"You really should push buttons that don't belong to you Veggie-san." A voice rang out from behind him. Vegeta turned around to see little Goten standing behind him with a chocolate ice cream cone in his hand. Goten had ice cream all over his face and was licking it gently. Vegeta rolled his eyes.
"Great, just what I need. A kaka-spawn telling what to do when he's eating ice cream." Vegeta growled out. Goten cocked his head and smiled at him. Vegeta just scowled.
"You shouldn't be so mean Veggie. It's not good for your health." Another voice rang out behind Goten.
"Oh great. Not only to I get the spawn of Kakarott, I get Kakarott himself. Someone must be getting revenge on me for giving me such a punishment." Vegeta snapped as he watched Goku stepped forward with a chocolate ice cream cone. Goku had more ice cream smeared around his mouth and hands. Vegeta grimaced. "What pray tell has made you grace your presence apon me you slob." Goku stopped eating his cone and smiled a big smiled at Vegeta.
"I came to see you Veggie. I though you might liked to spar with me." Goku said as he moved closer to Vegeta. Vegeta stepped back and held out a hand to stop Goku.
"I don't want to spar with YOU Kakarott. You're moronic self isn't worth my time. Now beat it before I call the cops on you for trespassing." Vegeta snapped. Goku looked down hurt.
"You didn't have to be so mean Vegeta. I can take a hint when I'm not wanted. In fact, sparring doesn't sound appealing at all! I'll go--"
"Throw your peasant body off the highest cliff to give the Saiyan no Ouji some peace." Vegeta interrupted.
"I'll go throw my peasant body off a high cliff and-HEY!" Goku shouted, Vegeta smirked and laughed at Goku. Goten chuckled to himself.
"You walked right into that one dad." Goten said as he finished his cone with some grace and cleaned his fingers.
"Well! If that's how I'm gonna be treated then I'll just leave!" Goku snapped as he walked away in anger. Goten followed and sighed.
"Don't worry Veggie-san. Dad will forget in a moment or two and return to pester you once he's done eating his cone." Goten trotted to catch up.
"Great. I look forward to Kakarott's annoying self in the future." Vegeta snorted as he leaned against the TM. Leaning too much, Vegeta knocked a screw loose inside the door of the TM. Switching a lever and pushing the start button, Vegeta walked into the machine and picked up the screw. The machine suddenly turned on a blue light and a door shut Vegeta in. "What?!"
The machine began analyzing Vegeta's structure with a blue light and began to power up. Noticing the machine's noises, Vegeta panicked. The machine's blue light then went bright white as Vegeta screamed. The machine then turned off rapidly.
Bulma heard Vegeta's pained scream, ran into her lab with speed she never knew she had.
"Vegeta?! Vegeta where are you?!" Bulma screamed. Bulma ran up to the TM and noticed it was turned on. "Oh no, I really hope he…" She noticed the lever was pulled on to a kitten symbol. "He did. Why do I bother?" Bulma said dryly. "Not like I didn't want to test it on him, but the TM wasn't even ready! Oh well. Guess I gotta see what he did to himself THIS time." Bulma pushed a button that opened the hatch.
"Meow!" ~ Cough Cough ~ Meow MEOW!" //What the heck happened?!\\ an angry squeaky voiced rang out. Bulma looked down to see a small kitten walking out of the machine coughing and hissing angrily. The kitten has a peach face with a black tuft of hair on his head. His four paws were white with yellowish toes, while the kitten's tail was brown. The kitten had a familiar widow's peak on his forehead, which ran to the tuft of hair. The kitten looked exactly like a cat version of the Saiyan no Ouji.
"Vegeta?" Bulma called. The kitten turned its head up to Bulma. It cocked its head to the side. "Oh boy…I'm going to hear an ear full for this." Bulma groaned out. Bulma bent down to the kitten's height and picked it up. "If you understand what I'm saying, then you will…"
"Meow! Meow! Meow!" The kitten hissed angrily. //How the heck did you get so tall?!\\ The kitten began hissing, spitting, meowing, and giving Bulma angry growls.
"Vegeta!" The kitten immediately shut its mouth. "If you're really Vegeta, then when I hold up this picture of Goku, you'll hiss and tear it apart." Bulma said as she held out a picture of Goku. Vegeta saw it and hissed angrily and slashed at it with his tiny claws. "Yup, this is Vegeta."
"Meow, meow, meow…meow!" Vegeta said as he puffed out his chest proudly. //I just killed Kaka-…Bakarott!\\
"Well now that we have it straight, how do we get you back to normal?" Bulma asked. Vegeta looked at Bulma with big cute eyes. "Awww, you're so cute!" Bulma said as she began to rub behind Vegeta's ears. Vegeta growled angrily then noticed that, it felt good. Vegeta began to purr contently. "Maybe we can wait to turn you back. You're so cute and friendly like this. I know! I'll just put this on you!" Bulma said. Bulma pulled out a small collar and latched it around Vegeta's neck. She then attached an ear-piece to her ear. Vegeta stop purring and hissed.
"What is this baka contraption?! Get it off! Get it off!" an angry squeaky squealed. "What the? What's wrong with my voice? Why are you taller than me! Why am I on all fours?!" Vegeta's voice squeaked out. Bulma pulled out a small mirror and showed it to Vegeta.
"Look into the mirror and you'll see what curiosity did to the cat!" Bulma said as she set the mirror down. Vegeta walked up to the mirror.
"So what? It's just a dumb cat." Vegeta said as he looked in the mirror. Bulma sighed.
"Notice anything unusual about the kitten in the mirror Vegeta? Why he's the same height as you? Why he's mimicking you?" Bulma said as she pointed down to him. Vegeta took a moment to think.
"Hmmm. Cat my size, has my voice, mimicking me…AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" The voice screamed loudly. Bulma covered her ears. "That's me! How? How'd this happen?!!" Vegeta squealed out. Bulma then picked up Vegeta.
"I told you not before not to touch untested inventions Vegeta. You never listen to me. Oih! If Goku sees you he'll go wild." Bulma sweat dropped then smirked evilly. "Wait a minute." Bulma said in a fake worried tone. "I might need Goku's help. Who will take care of you while I'm fixing the TM?" Bulma then smirked at Vegeta. Vegeta's back hair stood on end.
"Forget it onna. I'd rather be Bra's toy then Kakarott's new pet!" Vegeta shouted out. Too bad Bulma was at the phone calling Goku. "No Onna! Don't call-" Goku appeared suddenly before Bulma. "-Kakarott. I hate her." Vegeta then made a mad dash to hide under one of the tables.
"Thanks for coming Goku. I need someone to look after the kitten while I fix the TM." Bulma said as she smiled at the table Vegeta was hiding under, evilly. Vegeta gulped and hide farther under the table.
"O! Where is the little cutie Bulma! I love kittens! They're so cute and cuddly, and soft!" Goku squealed happily as he continued his incessant ranting. Bulma smirked at the table.
"Well Goku. You see…" Bulma fake sniffled. //You suck up.\\ "The little thing has a big problem. He's very shy and a little mean. Cute thing about him is…" Bulma held Goku in suspense. Goku was dancing on his toes waiting for the answer.
"Yes! Yes! What about him?!" Goku screamed out eager to hear. Goku is such a sucker. Oh well. Nice guys finish last.
"Well Goku. He looks like Vegeta, so that's what I called him. His name is Vegeta." Bulma said. Goku face faulted then jumped back up.
"You gotta be kidding me? This I gotta see!" Goku shouted out. "Where is he! I have to see this Veggie looking kitty!" Goku said.
"Pick up that table Goku and I'll get him." Goku obeyed and lifted the table up. Vegeta screamed and ran. Bulma was luckily faster and caught him. Picking Vegeta up she cupped her hands.
"O! O! Let me see Bulma! I wanna see!" Goku whimpered imploringly as he bent down. Bulma opened her hands to reveal a Vegeta looking cat. "O! Cutie!" Goku squealed as he grabbed Vegeta and began to death hug him!
"Onna! Help….Me!" Vegeta managed to choke out as Goku continued to hug the poor kitten. Bulma snickered.
"Goku don't squeeze him too much. You might kill him." Bulma said holding back her laughter.
"Laugh all you want onna. When this is all over, I'm going to hurt you." Vegeta growled out which sounded like low hissing to Goku.
"Sorry Bulma. Who is this little fella belong to?" Goku asked rubbing the little kittens tail. Vegeta went limp and purred contently in Goku's rather large hands.
"Last time I checked he was just a stray. I decided to keep him but I can't have the "little" guy in here or he might get into 'trouble'." Goku nodded.
"I accept baby sitting little Veggie kitten til you think it's time for him to return.!" Goku said saluting Bulma. Then it hit Bulma.
"Very good Goku, one last thing though. He loves to wear large PINK ribbons around his neck and tail."
"What?!" Vegeta shrieked. "I do not! Kakarott don't listen to her! She's lying." The ouji screamed, which to Goku came out as panicked meows.
"Don't worry Bulma. Veggie here will get the best ribbons I can get! And! He will be spoiled lavishly." Goku said as he puffed out his chest in pride. Bulma sweat dropped.
"And where do you supposed you'll get the money to spoil Vegeta with?" Bulma asked.
"I was just thinking the same thing. Kakarott can't afford to spoil me. He can't even afford to pay attention!" Vegeta snapped in his thoughts.
"I don't know!" Bulma and Vegeta face faulted. "But it doesn't matter! Come on Veggie! ChiChi will want to meet you!" Goku chirped happily. Vegeta froze. "Say bye bye to Bulma!" Goku said in a babyish voice.
"I'd like to say bye bye to you. Bulma you can't think of sending me away with Bakarott here are you! I thought you loved me more than that!" Vegeta squeaked. Bulma watched Vegeta struggle out of Goku's grasp meowing at her angrily.
"Bye Vegeta. Don't hurt Goku too much." She joked. Vegeta turned pale.
"Onna-" Vegeta shrieked, but was too late. Goku had already teleported away.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TK: "Hi again folks and welcome…back…" {sweat drops} "What happened here?" {Looks over to Pan and Trunks}
Videl: "Pan found him flirting with the same girl. She is now "punishing" him. Boy this is great. Popcorn?" {holds out popcorn}
ultra_gohan: "I'd prefer to watch Goku and Vegeta go at it. Oh well. You win some and you loose some." {takes some popcorn}
TK: "Oih. You guys are hopeless. Speaking of fighting-" {tackled out of her chair}
Goku: "Hiya TK! Miss me?" {hugs TK hard}
TK: "Uhhh…guys? A little….help…here…please!" {turning blue}
ultra_gohan: {turns and notices Goku} "Get off her before I pull out a needle!"
Goku: "Ahhh! Ok! Ok!" {hops off TK} "That all better?"
Vegeta: "No. If you were to run out of here and jump off a cliff, THEN it would be better." {takes his seat next to Videl and watches the Pan/Trunks fight}
Goku: "That's not very nice Veggie." {sniffles}
Vegeta: "So what. Like I care. Pass the popcorn boy!"
ultra_gohan: "Sorry. Grouch." {passes the popcorn}
TK: "Goku you can come sit by me if it makes you feel any better." {pats her lap. Gohan glares}
Goku: {becomes happy} "Yay! I get to sit on TK's lap!" {runs over and sits on her lap}
ultra_gohan: {stands up} "Uh uh! Up Goku! You aren't taking my g/f! You aren't sitting in her lap either!" {Goku sticks his tongue out} "Ohhh!"
TK: {snickers} "Am I hinting jealousy Gohan? Or is that just my imagination?"
ultra_gohan: "Yes you are! No girl friend of mine will have a Goku sitting on HER lap while I'm around! Now get up!" {Goku shakes his head}
Goku: "No!" {puts arms around TK's waist and hugs her}
TK: "If you would have paid attention to me Gohan, none of this would have happened." {smirks proudly and pats Goku's head} "I happen to like Goku right where he is. He's keeping my lap warm and he's soft like a teddy bear." {Goku smiles proudly}
ultra_gohan: {stands there and gawks} "You're allowing this?! You're enjoying this?! You want him there?!"
TK: "I see no reason not to. I have no reason to shove Goku away if my own b/f is not paying attention to me. You're too busy watching Pan kick Trunks' behind, that I'm lonely by myself. So Goku came to cheer me up."
Videl: "A lesson well learned. Guess TK got the last laugh as well as Pan. Too bad Trunks had to get beat up. Poor soul."
Vegeta: "Maybe now you'll learn not to turn your back on your girl boy! Even Kakarott is willing to steal her! That goes for you two Trunks!" {stuffs popcorn into his mouth}
ultra_gohan: "I feel so used. My g/f is in the arms of Goku! She's too good for you!"
Videl: "And I thought I was paranoid."
TK: "I know I'm too good for Goku. I'm the best there is."
Vegeta: "Let's not get carried away now."
ultra_gohan: "So is Goku your new b/f? Will he be warming your lap from NOW ON?!"
TK: "Now that's nonsense! Goku is just here for the fight. Oh! Looks like it's over. Better close off."
Videl: "Best go help Trunks. Looks like he'll need it."
ultra_gohan: "I'll grab Pan!"
Vegeta: "I'll get the brat."
TK: "I'll get the medical supplies."
Goku: "And I'll get to end the story. Bye all!"
