Why does everyone hate us?
Part 2: Jakenyasha & daddies little girl, the rebel
Naraku was already going into withdrawal from not doing anything evil. A nice shiny red car was parked nearby. "That's a nice shiny car. Car's shouldn't be that shiny!" Naraku pulled a sledgehammer out from under his baboon skin. "No I must remain strong. STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT YOU STUPID SHINY CAR!" the sound of hammer meeting car echoed through the night followed by a car alarm. "Oh crap I did it again!" Naraku pulled out a can of spray paint and sprayed the words "Naraku didn't do this" on the side of the car and ran away.
Meanwhile
"So you're sure you want this face? Don't want anything more original?" asked Penmaru.
"Of course I'm sure! Inuyasha was the only person to beat Sesshomaru sama in that stupid contest. If I have his face Sesshomaru sama will be begging me to come back."
"But aren't Inuyasha and Sesshomaru enemies? That doesn't make any sense?"
"I didn't pay you to spout stupid penguin logic at me. Now finish my face."
"But you didn't pay me yet."
"No more penguin logic!"
"All right! All right! Since Yokai heal faster then humans your face should be ready shortly. Just don't let that little girl hit you with a basketball until after it solidifies."
"Just you wait Sesshomaru! Jaken will be the next most popular character! Maybe Sesshomaru should be Jakens servant from now on! Hahahahahahaha!"
"Oh man he's losing touch with reality. I hope I get paid before he gets himself killed." Penmaru thought to himself.
Meanwhile Kikyo was trying to figure out how to go about making her move. She really didn't want to do this, but if it would make her more popular it would be worth it. "How did I get Inuyasha to fall in love with me? Oh that's right. I'll just do that again!"
Kagura had just finished her daily errands and was flying home with her groceries when several arrows knocked her off her flying feather. She found herself pinned to a tree with each sleath of her kimono. "What the hell is going on around here? When I get down whoever did this is going to pay!" She wanted to reach for her fan but her arms were pinned. Kimonos weren't the tightest fitting of cloths. If she wanted to she could slip her arms out and fall to the ground leaving her clothes there. But then she would be naked with whoever shot at her so she decided not to.
Kikyo walked out of the bushes "It was I who shot at you."
"Oh I should have known. What did my dad do to you this time? Whatever it is, it's not my fault. So let me down before I chop you into little pieces with my fan!"
Kikyo looked away and said "Kagura I could never hurt you. For you are only half demon."
"Uhhhh. actually I'm full demon. I don't think any of Narakus human side mixed with me."
Kagura was missing the point entirely. This wouldn't work if she didn't do something drastic.
Kikyo walked over and got up close to Kagura "Uhhhh..." Kagura was starting to get freaked out. Kikyo was acting really weird. "Kikyo.. I don't think mmmmmpppphhh!"
Kikyo kissed her full on the lips. Kikyo stepped back looking embarrassed. "I uhhh.." Kaguras face had turned all red. Kikyo hadn't been this embarrassed since the noodle incident with Naraku. "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. I'd better keep this a secret and just deal with being unpopular."
"I saw it! I'm not the only gay character on the show!" Jakotsu jumped out of the bushes. An entire crowd of journalists flashing cameras came out behind him.
"Wait! This isn't what it looks like!" Kikyo said backing away embarrassed. Kagura didn't say anything and just continued to blush.
"Kikyo! How long have you had these sorts of feelings for Kagura?" asked one tabloid journalist.
"Is it true that you two have been dating for three months in secret?"
"Is it true that you two did it three times already?"
"Is it true that Kagura is pregnant with your baby?"
Suddenly all the journalists were nailed by Kaguras fan sending them all flying across the street along with Jakotsu. "K-Kagura! You're naked! Here I'll get your clothes down! If anyone got any pictures I don't think there will be single tabloid with out an article about us! By the way this is all just a big misunderstanding and I.." "You don't need to apologies."
"I don't?"
"I've been alone all my life, being Narakus slave. No one's ever kissed me like that much less had the guts to try to ask me out. I'm glad you could be so honest with your feelings to me." Kagura hugged Kikyo.
"Uhoh..what have I got myself into? Kagura! Your naked and those people you blew over are taking photos of us!"
"It's ok! Naraku was always too protective of "daddies little girl" but I think it's time I showed him and the world just what a rebel I can be!" before Kikyo could complain anymore Kagura kissed her again while everyone was taking photos.
Of course Inuyasha was completely unaware of the predicament his ex girl friend had gotten herself into. At the moment he had his hands full trying to figure out how to communicate his feelings to his current one. "Kagome.we've been together for awhile and I uhhh."
"Stop stuttering and say it!" Naraku suddenly butted in between them!
Oh shit! It's the bastard!" said Inuyasha falling down in surprise. He quickly stood back up and took out Tessaiga.
"Naraku what are you doing here?" asked Kagome taking out her bow.
"Now now! There's no need for violence. It's true I was a bastard but that was the old Naraku. I've changed, you see I've seen the errors of my ways and have decided to dedicate my life to making you two confess your true feelings to each other."
"Feelings? What feelings? I don't know what you're talking about. She's just my tama detector!" Inuyasha stuck out his toung at Naraku.
"Sit!"
"Gah! Kagome! You made me bite my toung you wench!"
"Serves you right!"
"All right! That's it you two! You'd better confess your feelings right now or the fox kid gets it!" Naraku lifted up the baboon pelt to reveal Shippo duct taped to his armpit. Naraku held up a broken bottle next to Shippo.
"Kagome help! It smells funny in here!"
"You be quiet! You're my hostage of love! Hehehehehehe!"
"Kagome, is it just me or is Naraku acting a little strange?"
"Inuyasha.. Maybe we should do it. I wouldn't want to see anything happen to Shippo."
"No way! I know what your doing and your not going to get away with it Naraku! This is another one of your sneaky tricks!"
"It is not! I'm really not planning anything this time! Honest!"
"Oh no you don't! Something's going to happen if I admit my feelings isn't it? What is it? And how do I know that's really Shippo and not just some fake Naraku made trick Shippo?"
"It's really me Inuyasha! Remember that time I caught you wearing power puff girl underwear!"
"What! I told you never to tell anyone about that! But Naraku could have been spying with one of his bugs too! Feh! Nice try Naraku but I saw through your plot! Really I thought you'd have come up with something better."
"Are you really such an idiot! I'm not plotting anything, at the moment.. And this really is that fox brat! Don't you care if I make him into a hat or something?"
"Feh!"
"Inuyasha! Are you sure about this? What if that is Shippo?"
"Feh! Nothing can fool me. My clear bright eyes can spot one of Narakus tricks a mile away and this is one of them!"
Naraku looked like he was about to have an aneurysm. He started cursing and jumping up and down having a fit. Then he stopped and said "Fine then!" in a very whiny sounding voice. "I tried to be nice and this is how you treat me! I'll show you! I'll be a bigger bastard then ever! I'll screw over every anime character in your show and every other anime ever made! And then I'll tell them that Inuyasha made me do it! Then you'll be sorry! I'll even corrupt innocent little Shippo here into being my apprentice of evil!"
"Don't leave me here! It smells funny!" Shippo wailed. Naraku ran away but wasn't watching where he was going. He fell down the same manhole he led the little old lady into earlier.
"Feh! I hope that's the last time we have to see that damn dirty ape around here."
"Inuyasha. You've been watching too much planet of the apes. And what if that really was Shippo? What if Naraku corrupts him into being evil?"
"Feh!"
"Sit!"
Jaken had just unwrapped his face. Now all that was left for him to do was get in character. He picked up a book called "How to act like Inuyasha: For dummies"
Ch. 1
"If your unsure of something but want to make people think you have all the answers, one simple word will save you. Just say Feh whenever confronted with a difficult situation."
"Ask me what time it is Penmaru?"
"Uhhh. what time is it?"
"Feh!"
"Uhhhh yeah.. Remember if you don't have the payment in one year, I'll take your soul.
"Feh! Who needs a soul! I don't even wear shoes! Now I'm going to go flaunt my newfound success to Sesshomaru and make him jealous. This time I'll be the one wearing the sun glasses!"
Jaken left the building walking down the street with pride. Sure enough all the girls were looking at him and saying things like "How cute it's a little Inuyasha!"
"Hehehe! You've finally done it Jaken! You've made the big time. No one will ever look down at you again! Especially Sesshomaru sama." Jaken thought to himself.
Jakens fantasy.
"Jaken! Can you ever forgive me for firing you?"
"I don't know. If you want me back your going to have to offer me a lot of money."
"I don't want you to work for me! I want to work for you! And here take my money anyway! You can have my glasses too! They look much better on you!"
Back to reality
Jaken was suddenly broken from his fantasy when he noticed someone was following him. "Hey who are you?"
"Kawaii! A little Inuyasha!" It was Jakotsu.
"Say aren't you one of the shichi nin tai?"
"I'm Jokotsu. And I think you're really cute."
Jakotsu was blushing furiously. "Uhhh I'm sorry but I really don't like guys.." Jaken began to back away nervously but Jakotsu grabbed him.
"Your just like a cute little teddy bear. I'm going to take you home and we can play dress up with my dolls."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Jaken said in the some sort of way as Pedro from excel saga.
Naraku was already going into withdrawal from not doing anything evil. A nice shiny red car was parked nearby. "That's a nice shiny car. Car's shouldn't be that shiny!" Naraku pulled a sledgehammer out from under his baboon skin. "No I must remain strong. STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT YOU STUPID SHINY CAR!" the sound of hammer meeting car echoed through the night followed by a car alarm. "Oh crap I did it again!" Naraku pulled out a can of spray paint and sprayed the words "Naraku didn't do this" on the side of the car and ran away.
Meanwhile
"So you're sure you want this face? Don't want anything more original?" asked Penmaru.
"Of course I'm sure! Inuyasha was the only person to beat Sesshomaru sama in that stupid contest. If I have his face Sesshomaru sama will be begging me to come back."
"But aren't Inuyasha and Sesshomaru enemies? That doesn't make any sense?"
"I didn't pay you to spout stupid penguin logic at me. Now finish my face."
"But you didn't pay me yet."
"No more penguin logic!"
"All right! All right! Since Yokai heal faster then humans your face should be ready shortly. Just don't let that little girl hit you with a basketball until after it solidifies."
"Just you wait Sesshomaru! Jaken will be the next most popular character! Maybe Sesshomaru should be Jakens servant from now on! Hahahahahahaha!"
"Oh man he's losing touch with reality. I hope I get paid before he gets himself killed." Penmaru thought to himself.
Meanwhile Kikyo was trying to figure out how to go about making her move. She really didn't want to do this, but if it would make her more popular it would be worth it. "How did I get Inuyasha to fall in love with me? Oh that's right. I'll just do that again!"
Kagura had just finished her daily errands and was flying home with her groceries when several arrows knocked her off her flying feather. She found herself pinned to a tree with each sleath of her kimono. "What the hell is going on around here? When I get down whoever did this is going to pay!" She wanted to reach for her fan but her arms were pinned. Kimonos weren't the tightest fitting of cloths. If she wanted to she could slip her arms out and fall to the ground leaving her clothes there. But then she would be naked with whoever shot at her so she decided not to.
Kikyo walked out of the bushes "It was I who shot at you."
"Oh I should have known. What did my dad do to you this time? Whatever it is, it's not my fault. So let me down before I chop you into little pieces with my fan!"
Kikyo looked away and said "Kagura I could never hurt you. For you are only half demon."
"Uhhhh. actually I'm full demon. I don't think any of Narakus human side mixed with me."
Kagura was missing the point entirely. This wouldn't work if she didn't do something drastic.
Kikyo walked over and got up close to Kagura "Uhhhh..." Kagura was starting to get freaked out. Kikyo was acting really weird. "Kikyo.. I don't think mmmmmpppphhh!"
Kikyo kissed her full on the lips. Kikyo stepped back looking embarrassed. "I uhhh.." Kaguras face had turned all red. Kikyo hadn't been this embarrassed since the noodle incident with Naraku. "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. I'd better keep this a secret and just deal with being unpopular."
"I saw it! I'm not the only gay character on the show!" Jakotsu jumped out of the bushes. An entire crowd of journalists flashing cameras came out behind him.
"Wait! This isn't what it looks like!" Kikyo said backing away embarrassed. Kagura didn't say anything and just continued to blush.
"Kikyo! How long have you had these sorts of feelings for Kagura?" asked one tabloid journalist.
"Is it true that you two have been dating for three months in secret?"
"Is it true that you two did it three times already?"
"Is it true that Kagura is pregnant with your baby?"
Suddenly all the journalists were nailed by Kaguras fan sending them all flying across the street along with Jakotsu. "K-Kagura! You're naked! Here I'll get your clothes down! If anyone got any pictures I don't think there will be single tabloid with out an article about us! By the way this is all just a big misunderstanding and I.." "You don't need to apologies."
"I don't?"
"I've been alone all my life, being Narakus slave. No one's ever kissed me like that much less had the guts to try to ask me out. I'm glad you could be so honest with your feelings to me." Kagura hugged Kikyo.
"Uhoh..what have I got myself into? Kagura! Your naked and those people you blew over are taking photos of us!"
"It's ok! Naraku was always too protective of "daddies little girl" but I think it's time I showed him and the world just what a rebel I can be!" before Kikyo could complain anymore Kagura kissed her again while everyone was taking photos.
Of course Inuyasha was completely unaware of the predicament his ex girl friend had gotten herself into. At the moment he had his hands full trying to figure out how to communicate his feelings to his current one. "Kagome.we've been together for awhile and I uhhh."
"Stop stuttering and say it!" Naraku suddenly butted in between them!
Oh shit! It's the bastard!" said Inuyasha falling down in surprise. He quickly stood back up and took out Tessaiga.
"Naraku what are you doing here?" asked Kagome taking out her bow.
"Now now! There's no need for violence. It's true I was a bastard but that was the old Naraku. I've changed, you see I've seen the errors of my ways and have decided to dedicate my life to making you two confess your true feelings to each other."
"Feelings? What feelings? I don't know what you're talking about. She's just my tama detector!" Inuyasha stuck out his toung at Naraku.
"Sit!"
"Gah! Kagome! You made me bite my toung you wench!"
"Serves you right!"
"All right! That's it you two! You'd better confess your feelings right now or the fox kid gets it!" Naraku lifted up the baboon pelt to reveal Shippo duct taped to his armpit. Naraku held up a broken bottle next to Shippo.
"Kagome help! It smells funny in here!"
"You be quiet! You're my hostage of love! Hehehehehehe!"
"Kagome, is it just me or is Naraku acting a little strange?"
"Inuyasha.. Maybe we should do it. I wouldn't want to see anything happen to Shippo."
"No way! I know what your doing and your not going to get away with it Naraku! This is another one of your sneaky tricks!"
"It is not! I'm really not planning anything this time! Honest!"
"Oh no you don't! Something's going to happen if I admit my feelings isn't it? What is it? And how do I know that's really Shippo and not just some fake Naraku made trick Shippo?"
"It's really me Inuyasha! Remember that time I caught you wearing power puff girl underwear!"
"What! I told you never to tell anyone about that! But Naraku could have been spying with one of his bugs too! Feh! Nice try Naraku but I saw through your plot! Really I thought you'd have come up with something better."
"Are you really such an idiot! I'm not plotting anything, at the moment.. And this really is that fox brat! Don't you care if I make him into a hat or something?"
"Feh!"
"Inuyasha! Are you sure about this? What if that is Shippo?"
"Feh! Nothing can fool me. My clear bright eyes can spot one of Narakus tricks a mile away and this is one of them!"
Naraku looked like he was about to have an aneurysm. He started cursing and jumping up and down having a fit. Then he stopped and said "Fine then!" in a very whiny sounding voice. "I tried to be nice and this is how you treat me! I'll show you! I'll be a bigger bastard then ever! I'll screw over every anime character in your show and every other anime ever made! And then I'll tell them that Inuyasha made me do it! Then you'll be sorry! I'll even corrupt innocent little Shippo here into being my apprentice of evil!"
"Don't leave me here! It smells funny!" Shippo wailed. Naraku ran away but wasn't watching where he was going. He fell down the same manhole he led the little old lady into earlier.
"Feh! I hope that's the last time we have to see that damn dirty ape around here."
"Inuyasha. You've been watching too much planet of the apes. And what if that really was Shippo? What if Naraku corrupts him into being evil?"
"Feh!"
"Sit!"
Jaken had just unwrapped his face. Now all that was left for him to do was get in character. He picked up a book called "How to act like Inuyasha: For dummies"
Ch. 1
"If your unsure of something but want to make people think you have all the answers, one simple word will save you. Just say Feh whenever confronted with a difficult situation."
"Ask me what time it is Penmaru?"
"Uhhh. what time is it?"
"Feh!"
"Uhhhh yeah.. Remember if you don't have the payment in one year, I'll take your soul.
"Feh! Who needs a soul! I don't even wear shoes! Now I'm going to go flaunt my newfound success to Sesshomaru and make him jealous. This time I'll be the one wearing the sun glasses!"
Jaken left the building walking down the street with pride. Sure enough all the girls were looking at him and saying things like "How cute it's a little Inuyasha!"
"Hehehe! You've finally done it Jaken! You've made the big time. No one will ever look down at you again! Especially Sesshomaru sama." Jaken thought to himself.
Jakens fantasy.
"Jaken! Can you ever forgive me for firing you?"
"I don't know. If you want me back your going to have to offer me a lot of money."
"I don't want you to work for me! I want to work for you! And here take my money anyway! You can have my glasses too! They look much better on you!"
Back to reality
Jaken was suddenly broken from his fantasy when he noticed someone was following him. "Hey who are you?"
"Kawaii! A little Inuyasha!" It was Jakotsu.
"Say aren't you one of the shichi nin tai?"
"I'm Jokotsu. And I think you're really cute."
Jakotsu was blushing furiously. "Uhhh I'm sorry but I really don't like guys.." Jaken began to back away nervously but Jakotsu grabbed him.
"Your just like a cute little teddy bear. I'm going to take you home and we can play dress up with my dolls."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Jaken said in the some sort of way as Pedro from excel saga.
