I do not own anything in this story, but some names are my own invention. Also, I would like to apologize in advance to all those who have chosen alternative lifestyles. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- As the screen opens, Mario, Peach, Toadsworth, and an assembly of Toads are standing on Elefino Airstrip.

Peach: Oh, Mario!

Toadsworth: That's quite a useful backpack you have there.

F.A.G.: I am F.A.G., the Flamboyant Aquatic Gun from Gass Inc.

Toadsworth: Remarkable! Say, umm, F.A.G., was it? Would you like to, umm, you know, meet me at the hotel for, umm, some playtime?

F.A.G.: Ha. Ha. Sure.

Toadsworth: ^_^

Everybody Else: o.0

As Mario tucks the Amazing Shrinking Rainbow Bright doll in his back pocket, a duo of Piñata (natives) police rush up on Mario, trailing paper máche and candy. They grab him and put him in handcuffs, and then throw him on the ground and start beating him. Mario goes unconcious.

When he wakes up, Mario is handcuffed and seated in the defendant's chair in Elefino Courthouse.

Bailiff: All rise for the honorable (cough) Judge Jude.

As "Hey Jude" plays in the background, an aging Piñata walks in and sits behind the bench. Judge Jude looks vaguely like Judge Mills Lane.

Judge Jude: I want to see a nice, clean case. Now, let's get it on!

Mario: I'm-a innocent! I was-a the one-a that cleaned up-a the Airstrip!

Judge Jude: Don't spit on my hamburger and tell me it's special sauce! Prosecutor what do you have to say?

Prosecutor: Our lovely island of Elefino has been beset by a strange, goop- like substance. This goop has caused several of our citizens to become homosexuals, and it also has caused many of our famous landmarks to disappear. It has even threatened our very way of life! The Rainbow Bright Dolls, once protectors of our outrageous lifestyles, have fled their traditional gathering spot, the Rainbow Tower. It seems they have fled because of this strange goop. According to this police drawing, it is obvious that the guilty party is here among us, and it is none other than Mario!

He holds up a poster of a thin, shadowy person with a crew cut, who is also holding a mascara brush.

Peach: Objection! That looks nothing like Mario.

Judge Jude: Shut yer trap! If I wanted to be told how to do my job, I would hire a lawyer, not a nitwit, stuck-up Princess. Mario, I hereby sentence you to clean up the pollution on Isle Elefino. You can't leave until all of your vile handiwork is cleaned up.

Judge Jude bangs his gavel, and the screen cuts to Mario's jail cell.

Mario: Mama-mia! What-a are we-a gonna do!?

F.A.G.: WEREN'T YOU EVEN LISTENING TO WHAT THE PROSECUTOR WAS SAYING!!! HE EXPLAINED THE WHOLE THING TO YOU!!!

Mario: Sor-ry. I fell asleep.

F.A.G.: I wish I had that luxury.

F.A.G. then restates what the prosecutor said.

Mario: So, I have to clean up the pollution, retrieve the Rainbow Bright Dolls, and stop this dude who's impersonating me, is that right?

F.A.G.: (lets out a big sigh) Yes, for the tenth time.

The screen goes black.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO HEAR MY F#%*ING EXPLANATION AGAIN!!?

Y-y-yes??? No!

Yes.

YOU F#%*ING #%&HOLE!! I'M F#%*ING GOING TO KILL YOU!!!

The last scene replays.

YOU BETTER NOT WANT TO HEAR THAT D#%& EXPLANATION AGAIN!!

Yes. No.

No.

The screen goes blank. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- Well, Chapter 2 is up. Did you like it? Please Review!