She stares dispassionately at the scene below, not feeling an inkling of attachment to the creatures. Their cares, worries, and feelings wash over her but she does not care; she just watches as what happenes, happens. She feels *them*, feels what they feel, but nothing of her own. There is no curiosity, just an acceptance of what had always been. The others milling around are insignificant and unimportant ... all, that is, but one. One, who lays next to a black object. No, who stood in front of it. This lone figure experiences a sudden burst of helpless shock... and She feels it. She, who does not feel, CAN not feel, feels. It is utterly foreign, altogether out of Her league, and yet there is no shock, no epiphany as to the why of what was happening - she simply feels where she's never felt before, and accepts this too.
The screaming, ever present before, stops suddenly as Silence took it place. The scene shifted, taking on a static appearance before blanking out like a video screen. Surrounded by blackness, which she is used to, she waits.
Far in the distance, beyond the human eye but not beyond hers, a lone figure appeared. She stared at the shape and Shiva stared back, still frozen immoble in his cocoon of ice. His piercing gaze searched hers, for what she didn't know; she stared back impassively, allowing his perusal.
::It shouldn't be like this.:: His lips didn't move, frozen as they were, but she heard him anyway. It was not a question, so she felt no inclination to answer.
They stared at one another in the silentness of the void, then Shiva "spoke" again. ::When the time comes, we will be ready. Until they you must prepare yourself...::
\ \ \ \ \ \ \ \
Back at the scene suddenly, the same myriad of emotions floating about her. Above all else however, an unrelenting anguish pierces through her. She, who has never before been allowed or perhaps allowed herself to feel, is overcome by this emotion. It is not a pleasant introduction to Sensation - it is downright un-pleasant, to say the very least. Attempting to gain back her detached status she tries to brush the alien feelings aside but cannot, unable to shake the bizarre sensations in her breast .. It is unpleasant to her and she hates it. Hate is new to her, and she fears it. As is fear...
Time shifts. The scene warps, subtly changed. The sadness that caused her the unpleasantness is now gone, replaced by rage. Anger. A spirit of revenge. These she knows even if she has never felt them herself until now, but there is also a requesting, which she understands readily enough. Wishing to end these feelings (it is curious, to wish for something) she rushes down to answer the request...
----------------------
My eyes shot open and I awoke with a start, trembling and sweating.
Well, I *would* have been sweating if I hadn't been already immersed in a tub of tepid water. I knew immediately where I was, but for one long agonizing moment I had no clue how I'd gotten there. The slate grey walls of my bathroom seemed suddenly closer than they should have been, the very scarcity of it all making me see things where there was nothing. I'd never been much for decorating, always figuring it to be too much hassle and just simply unnecessary since all one had to do was live in their quarters; my rooms were pretty much standard issue, the only things hanging on the wall being a couple mirrors, a small clock, and a hook for my weapon. Unlike Selphie's room, in which each room was jam-packed full of decorations, useless knickknacks, and souvenirs from our various missions I preferred the uncluttered look so that my walls, tables, and even my floors were free of everything. My sole concession to 'decoration' was a single doily atop my dresser that had been a gift from Matron, who'd taken one look at my room and given it to me the next day. However, in this one instance I fervently wished there was something I could focus on other than the spigot at the other end of the bath.
"Hyne," I muttered, wiping my face with a shaky wet hand as I sat up in the tub, bits and pieces of reality and memory slowly filtering in. I'd awoken in my room after the fight (I still cringed as I thought of it), having no clue how I'd managed to get from one side of the SeeD complex to the other. After taking one small whiff of my clothing, though, I had figured it was high time I took the chance to take a bath real. Upon entering the hot water, within minutes I had not so surprisingly fallen asleep.
As more of the real world crept back into my conscious mind, I found I was starting to forget my dream. I had to admit though, from what little I could vividly remember I wasn't sure if it was such a bad thing to forget. Holy Hyne, but it had been strange; even remembering so little of it didn't minimize the freaky quality. I could sort of remember a chaotic scene, something black, having a one-sided conversation, and generally feeling ... nothing.
That, I think, had been the weirdest part of the whole experience. I'd never in my life felt that apathetic; uncaring; dead. Perhaps, at times, I've come off as seeming that way to others, but that was just how I often preferred to be viewed as. It makes teaching, and life in general, much less complicated; in some ways, I understood why Squall was the way he was. The human animal, however, is not supposed to feel nothing; we always have something going through our heads and hearts no matter what face we show to the public. Therefore, that whole experience was, as Zell would probably put it, very whiggy.
I lifted my foot to the spigot and turned on the hot water as I struggled to remember other parts of the dream. Someone had spoken to me but I couldn't remember about what; I did remember something about ice though. I also remembered a black something-or-another which had been somehow important...
The dream continued to slip further away, erasing from my mind even the bits I could initially remember. Cursing softly, I continued to grasp wildly about for fragments of a dream that continued to splinter, all the while trying to remind myself I didn't believe in dreams. A total lie of course; we had all been subjected to some intense dreams on the mission with Adel. Those had been extenuating circumstances, of course, and somehow I had a strong doubt that Ellone had anything to do with this 'dream'.
I noticed belatedly that my hands were wrinkled beyond belief and realized I had no real idea just how long I'd been in the bath. Somewhat reluctantly, I shut off the water and reached around behind me, grabbing the towel I knew was there and stepping out of the tub.
--
Ten minutes later I had essentially forgotten ninety-nine percent of the dream, but had new problems to worry about.
"C'mon Quistis," Selphie pleaded, giving me her trademark puppydog eyes, "you know you want to come with us."
"Oh you know that," I repeated, but the hint of sarcasm was lost on Selphie.
"And besides," she continued, an I've-outsmarted-you smile stretching across her face, "I know for a fact that you're off-duty with no classes for the rest of the week too so you're free to play."
Searching desperately for any excuse, I argued, "I can't Selphie, I still have lessons to write up and assignments to grade that I promised..."
"Oh pish, you've got all week to grade them, and just use the same lesson plans from last year," Selphie replied enthusiastically, showing a surprising knowledge of teaching habits. Then her expression again turned pleading. "Look, I've already got Squall and Irvine going, and I'd have the others too if I could find them. C'mon Quisty, please."
She'd gotten Squall to come? Curious as to how that had been pulled off I peaked around my doorway and, sure enough, saw our stoic commander leaning against the wall opposite Irvine. It being strange lately for him to be alone I asked, "Where's Rinoa?"
"Off shopping in Balamb," Irvine replied, flashing Squall a wink. "Said she had some ideas for updating her boyfriend's wardrobe."
Had Rinoa finally decided Squall's leather ensemble needed updating, I wondered, giving the Commander a probing look. It had been his trademark for a long time and, quite frankly, he seemed to like it; I could well imagine his wardrobe filled with duplicates of the same outfit or slight variations thereof. Of course, I'd always been of the opinion he looked quite good in that ensemble. Delectable, actually, although I would never, ever admit to thinking that. I had to weather enough whip jokes, but you throw a leather fascination into the mix...Oy.
"So," Selphie continued, gracing me once again with a pleading look, "you're coming, right Quistis? Please please please pleasepleasepleasepleaseplea.."
"All right, all right I'll go," I said, heaving a huge sigh. I swear, I'm doomed from the start if Selphie wants something: the girl just doesn't know when to quit. The fact that she'd gotten Squall to come should have given me a clue as to how tenacious she was. "But," I added, "I can't stay out very long since I still have a lot.."
"Boo-ya!" Selphie exclaimed suddenly, rounding on Irvine. "I told you I could get her to come! Toldja toldja toldja!"
I just stared at Selphie as she did a little victory dance in front of Irvine. "You know," I commented dryly, my mouth pursing a bit, "I just remembered something very important that demands my immediate attent--"
"Nup, no backsies," Selphie chirped, grabbing my arm and hauling me across the threshold of my quarters. "We're going to have fun, and so are the two of you. You guys work too much," she added, rolling her eyes, "so no saying 'no' okee?"
Realizing the futility of arguing with Selphie and wishing I hadn't had the presence of mind to grab my whip before I was unceremoniously yanked out of my room, I reluctantly fell in step beside Squall. Selphie hung on Irvine's arm in front of us, chattering away a storm which Irvine seemed willing and able to follow. I stayed silent for a few moments as we walks out onto the main quad, then asked Selphie while she was taking a breath between bursts of conversation, "How did you know I had my schedule so free?"
"Oh, Squall told us," she answered, flashing me a big grin. "He thought it might be nice to ask you to come too."
"Ah." That's all I said. I was silent again as the duo ahead of us flirted and chatted away, then leaned over to Squall. "Misery loves company," I murmured, darting him a look.
He characteristically, and wisely, said nothing.
-------------
I suppose we did have a bit of fun in the Training Center, although it wasn't quite the challenge it used to be. When we were younger we often did this, go in groups to hang out and kill monsters. Perhaps it seems sort of a macabre way for teenagers to have fun, compared to what city children about the same age would be doing. Back then, a T-rexaur would last us hours, and even grats (or vomit monsters, as some cadets called them) took longer than a few swipes of a blade. Times had certainly changed since then, or more importantly our power levels had. It was strange to think that just a couple years back we were doing this regularly for fun, but somehow Selphie and Irvine made even the five-second battles seem at least a bit entertaining.
We were just finishing off our second T-rexaur when we heard a high-pitched scream from across the training yard, choked off very suddenly. Abandoning the nearly dead T-rex, the four of us sprinted towards the scream. Squall took the dubious shortcut through the dense center of the arena while the other three of us went around the side, zooming past numerous creatures that tried picking fights with us but were summarily ignored.
We got to the site just as Squall engaged the creature. It let out a loud, unpleasantly familiar roar and lashed out, narrowly missing Squall as he leaped back. A bright green tail hurtled towards him as he recovered from the dive, and I unfurled Save The Queen and lashed out as Irvine let loose his own blast. Both explosions hit the tail, driving it away from Squall and turning the dragon's attention on us.
An emerald dragon. I had never seen one in person but had learned about them in my bestiary studies, and knew they were nigh unto impossible to kill. A combination of ice and lightening elements, they were impervious to any elemental attacks due to their combination of elements, and using any ice or electrical attacks would only serve to revitalize them. I was surprised we hadn't come against any off the coast of Dollet, as that is where the creatures are said to reside.
I had absolutely no idea how it had gotten into Balamb's training grounds. There was no chance that any of my students could survive more than two rounds against this monster, with their still-developing skills and simple training weapons. I couldn't bear to think how many, if any, might have already come across this beast and wound up missing.
I didn't get a whole lot of time to wonder about it before the fight was joined. Selphie rushed to the side of the two cadets, one barely standing and looking horribly abused, the other on the ground and looking infinitely worse even from this distance. Irvine took a protective stance in front of her and the cadets while Squall and I took the dragon on directly.
The massive head swung down and Squall narrowly missed another attack, barely managing to jump out of the way in time. I grabbed the opening, lashing out with my whip at the creature's head. It bellowed as the blow connected with its mouth, reeling back a bit.
"It's an emerald dragon," I yelled. "Don't hit it with any elemental magicks, especially lightening or ice." I leaped backwards as a claw came dangerously close to my chest and continued, "Keep it to physical attacks and watch out for..." I cut off as the giant wings spread wide, and barely managed a broken "Oh Hyne" before the creature unleashed its magical attack.
None of us had done a healing spell since we had entered the arena, partly because we hadn't needed to and partly because of an unspoken group challenge. Sort of like a 'first person who has to heal themselves loses' kind of thing. I myself had gotten caught up in it too since I hadn't figured there was any real need not to, and therefore none of us were really up to sniff. Hindsight is 20/20, as they say.
Rearing up, the emerald dragon's mouth opened wide and a freezing cloud of moisture billowed forth, instantly enveloping all of us. I felt the hair on my arms stand up for a split second as charged particles amassed within the cloud, then the fog of frozen water became a three-dimensional electric fence as lightening speared through all of us like knives. There was no time to utter protective spells of any kind, no way to unjunction anything that might make us vulnerable; caught with our proverbial pants down, we all went through a short eternity of hell.
When it was over several seconds later, we could all barely stand. The dragon of course, now fully revitalized after including himself in his own elemental attack, lashed out with its tail and sent both Squall and I, at the front of the melee, hurtling through the air.
I slammed back first through a wood wall, its flimsiness barely slowing my momentum. The stone on the other side of the room did the trick, however, and I know I momentarily blacked out. Stars danced across my vision, but the moment I was lucid enough to make out the room I struggled to my feet, trying mightily to ignore the pain in my head and back as I staggered outside.
I had apparently been blown a good seventy feet from my original position. Both Selphie and Irvine had moved around the corner a ways to give their long-range weapons more maneuverability, with the dragon following close behind. Irvine had one student slung over his shoulder while Selphie, showing more strength than I'd thought she possessed, was dragging the other with her non-weaponed hand. The injured probably shouldn't have been moved, but then they had a very good reason to take that risk stalking after them.
I closed my eyes and, swallowing the nausea threatening to overwhelm me, case Aura on the two to allow them access to their limit breaks. I also attempted the highest level healing spell I could generate in my current state, which frankly didn't allow for very complicated magicks. I had to have been close to my own limit break, seeing as I hadn't used it all during the time in the arena here.
I picked my way out onto the ground, stumbling on unsteady legs. Belatedly I knew I had a concussion among other things, but my limbs all seemed to be in working order and I figured that was all I needed to fight with. I saw what looked to be the beginning of Selphie's limit break before I unceremoniously tripped, falling flat on my face.
Wincing at the pains that fall had brought into sharp focus, I staggered upright just in time to see the dragon again rear up and deliver its elemental attack. Limping forward as fast as my body would allow, I swung my whip in a wide arc around the beast. It stretched out past the beast, curving inwards, then came whistling back and struck the dragon square in the chest. The monster reeled back from the unexpected blow, bellowing in outrage. Irvine and Selphie, both on their last legs after that attack, were forgotten as it whirled around to face me.
I had at that moment a glimpse of what death looked like: green scaly face, slitted orange eyes, ice vapor issuing from a long snout, and rows of very pointed teeth, some of which were longer than my forearm. A deep rumbling growl made it way to my ears, and at that moment I knew I was totally on my own. Selphie and Irvine were helpless, Squall was nowhere to be seen, and I had an angry green head as big as I was looking ready to tear me into painfully small pieces.
Any normal person would have run. Actually, any sane person would have, but this is me we're talking about. Me, plus one doozy of a concussion and a sudden irritability at the world. The blow to my head must have jarred something loose because I was suddenly very angry. Not scared, not panicked, just furious that I had to constantly put up with surprises like this. First the whole Galbadian mission, then having a one-time friend Martine attack me and my entourage, the whole bloody ordeal with Seifer... A million little day-to-day complaints welled up and suddenly wanted out, and here I was nine-tenths beat up with an unbeatable dragon staring me in the face.
At that particular instant, sanity wasn't exactly my strong suit.
The dragon opened its mouth to unleash another attack and, with speed I thought I had lost along with my sanity, I lashed out with my whip, willing the weapon as far down the beast's throat as was anatomically possible. I felt ice-cold wind buffet my face just as I felt my whip jerk slightly and heard a muffled explosion from somewhere before me. The dragon blanched suddenly, its jaws snapping shut mid-attack. Eyes glazing over slightly, it gave a curious belch and snapped its head up, pulling my whip and subsequently me forward as well. All coordination was lost and, for the second time in as many minutes, I fell flat on my face.
I managed to pull my whip back and roll over so I was facing upwards, but that was the extent of my body's maneuverability. I had completely run out of steam, and could barely find the energy to think properly. Belatedly I watched the dragon stagger around in agony, and when its ungainly footwork took a sudden turn in my direction I could do nothing but stare.
There was the distinctive retort of a gunblade from somewhere nearby, and the dragon reeled back away from me. Two more gunblade blasts echoed through the air, each hitting the dragon square in the face, then a dark shape from above and landed in front of me.
"Squall," I breathed, my eyes struggling to focus on the figure who had single-handedly taken on the beast. The blade flashed through the air and more retorts rang out, each pre-empting a roar from the dragon. The beast was, amazingly, driven backwards by the lone figure, moving it away from the rest of us and farther into the training grounds.
As I watched more of the fight it occurred to me that Squall had learned several new techniques since I'd last fought with him. Some of the moves I had never seen our Commander do before, and believe me when I say I had fought quite a few battles with him. I watched the figure vault into the air over the dragon, sailing overhead and letting off a number of blasts aimed directly at the monster's wings and back, each shot launching him farther and farther upwards and out of range for the lashing tail.
Feeling more than a little bit loopy, I stared bemusedly at the fighter. He seemed taller than I remembered our Commander being, and not with the lankiness I usually associated with Squall. Although he was the only gunblade specialist I knew who wore black, was the Commander that stocky?
The room lost focus suddenly as a sudden burning sensation developed at the center of my chest. I welcome it, immediately recognizing my own personal sign that I had reached my limit break. We each had our own physical indications as to when we had access to the energies making up our most powerful attacks. Selphie once said that her hair stood on end right before she could do hers, while Zell had confessed to having a sudden craving for vanilla prior to his. I didn't stop to think about how I could possibly be able to perform any powerful moves when I'd completely run out of energy but embraced it, eager to get back into the fray.
For an instant I felt the soft pulse of magic that accompanied my limit breaks, filling me with energy and vitality. It was enough to allow me to stand, then ...
HOLY HYNE!
It was like a dam exploding over a tiny brook. Waves of power crashed into me, causing me to stagger back away from the fight. If I could have screamed I would have, but the power, white-hot and wild, would not have it. It coursed through me, coming from some limitless source that continued to role over and through my body, practically lifting me off my feet. There was a dull ache in my breast, as if my heart was suddenly too big for my chest, and my head felt like it was going to split. Barely maintaining control over my limbs, I brought my fist up to press against my chest - not that it did a whole lot of good. The knuckles on my hand were white with strain, my fingernails digging deep enough into my palms to draw blood. My body, it seemed, showed no outward signs of my inner turmoil; I would have expected my skin to be glowing at the very least. My mind soundlessly screamed but my mouth was frozen, unable to utter a single sound.
All I knew was one thing: this was NOT one of my normal limit breaks.
In an instant, time stretched: there's no other way to describe it. My consciousness seemed to expand, and quite suddenly I was aware of several things happening from all corners of the arena. I knew a T-rexaur, having finished off the one we'd left and alerted by the smell and blood, was on its way in our direction. I could feel Selphie, Irvine, the cadets, and Seifer's (Seifer?) life force, knew the former three were running out of time and the latter was rapidly beginning to tire. I couldn't feel Squall, which would have worried me if I hadn't had more urgent things to worry about.
Seifer leaped over the green tail that came flying in his direction, lashing downwards with the blade. The gunblade hit the tail directly and seem to do little except shear several metallic scales off. The dragon, however, bellowed and, shifting its weight suddenly, reversed the direction its tail flew. Seifer, just landing on his feet and unable to dodge quite that quickly, received a blow straight on the chest that propelled him almost forty feet through a clump of trees. I heard a loud splash that indicated he'd landed in the lake even as the dragon turned back on Selphie, Irvine, and the cadets.
I watched all this happen, waves of power still flowing through me as powerful as a raging river and as ephemeral as air. Any time I tried to wield it, to simply grasp ahold of it, it turned intangible yet no less powerful. I saw Seifer's blow, watched him sail through the air like I knew I must have, knew precisely where he landed, watched the dragon swoop down on my defenseless friends and students...
"NO!" Unstable as I was, not knowing what in Hyne's name was happening to me, I nonetheless managed to take a step towards them in an effort to help.
And the power shifted. I could feel some change, but tried to ignore it and lashed out with my whip. My arm wasn't working right; the whip, far from doing any 'lashing', dangled from loose fingers at the end of an arm held out parallel to the ground. Whatever it was inside of me, however, had shifted, its wild rushing turned in one direction. My hand pointed at the dragon, and my chin jerked upwards as the power flowed out of me, out of my arm, and in the direction that arm pointed. The dragon, swooping down to consume my friends, stopped suddenly; almost comically froze in position, jaws wide just over Selphie and the cadet she held, balanced precariously on its opposite front and rear feet. It blinked once, the only indication that it wasn't a statue, then began to tremble.
Jaw clenching in anger at what had been about to happen, my hand clenched into a fist and the dragon's trembling became even greater. The power demanded release; how I didn't know, but I was too angry to care. This creature had been about to take away a friend and a student, and that was, in my mind, not forgivable. "No," I repeated softly, as if to a bad puppy. Not knowing quite what I was doing, running purely on instinct, I let my hand spring open... And the dragon vanished. Not exploded, not vaporized, just disappeared. Small lights glittered where it had been a moment before, then those too slowly winked out.
Silence fell on the grounds for several seconds, then a sob from one of the cadets punctured the air. The noise seemed to galvanize everyone, although considering the shape they were all in they didn't 'galvanize' very fast.
The power still rushed through me, but it seemed content now that it had been released. I could do little but stand there, jaw trembling in what I could only guess was shock, hand still outstretched with widespread palm pointing upwards. It took an effort to get it closed and back to my side, but what had seemed impossible before was easier now that I didn't feel like I was being pulled in every direction. Energy still rushed through me, but it was gentler, calmer than it had been before the dragon had...disappeared.
Selphie and Irvine were casting healing spells on one another and the two cadets. I heard Dr. Kadowaki's voice through Selphie's communicator, then the girl turned her attentions to me. For once, she seemed speechless, then gave me a tremulous smile. "Was that a new limit break?" she asked, hesitantly coming towards me.
I took in a shaky breath and opened my mouth to say something, I wasn't sure what, when just like that the power shut down. The energy that had been swirling in me disappeared as suddenly as it had manifested, leaving me with an empty feeling that almost felt worse than the energy had. The area lost focus and pitched, whirling around until it was sideways. I felt the impact of the ground yet none of its sting, and saw several dark shapes moving towards me before blackness consumed me.
