Author: Ela2002

Title: Home (ch2)

Summary: Carter and Abby's relationship is tested.

Disclaimer: They aren't mine, I'm poor don't sue me please.

Abby lay on the sofa watching the sun rise through her window, it looked like it was going to be a beautiful day, and for once she had a rare day off. Not that she felt much like doing anything with it. She had crept out of her bedroom to get sick, quietly. She knew it was absurd but she wanted Carter to get as much sleep as possible, he looked exhausted. Having spent best part of half an hour throwing up she decided to lie on the sofa rather than risk disturbing him again. She resisted the urge to be irritated that she been in the bathroom for that amount of time without him noticing, it was only to be expected, he had flown half way around the world yesterday to be greeted by the news he was going to be a father. She was sure that was enough to justify heavy sleeping for one night. Soft foot fall alerted her that he had indeed a awoken, he sounded confused, softly padded one direction, pausing then rerouting himself. Either he had forgotten he was not in his apartment or he was looking for her.

He popped his head around the door frame. Early morning sunlight shone from behind him, giving him an odd halo effect from his wildly sticking up hair. "Morning." She said in greeting.

He flopped onto the sofa next to her and nuzzled into her, "Hey. You OK? I missed you. When did you get up?"

She shrugged "About an hour ago. I was feeling nauseous and didn't want to disturb you."

He sighed a worried sigh that she recognised, he was resisting the urge to fuss over her, "You've lost weight you know. Are you keeping fluids down?"

"Yes, I am an OB nurse you know. I'm fine, I just still get a little sick some times."

"Isn't it supposed to start getting better at nine weeks? That's something to look forward to."

"It is supposed to. But, Carter, I'm fourteen weeks, you've been away a while you know."

He nodded "I guess, mind if I use your shower?"

But he was already up and half way out of the room, leaving her alone with the sunrise.

After a quiet breakfast and a frankly frosty morning Abby made him sit down opposite her at the table, "Carter," She said quietly, "is there something wrong? I get the impression I've done something to upset you?"

He looked at the table and considered for a moment, then looked back at her, she was startled to see how angry he looked, where had this come from?

"Fourteen weeks Abby? When did you find out?"

She was taken aback. She had thought he'd understood, their relationship had bee virtually non existent, his grandmother had died, Eric, her mother, everything had gotten in the way of her either considering what she wanted or talking to him "I don't know John, a while ago I guess, it was after Eric was diagnosed, just before he took me to see his plane, I think."

"Abby!" He shouted, she started back slightly, "That was months ago, I can't believe you didn't tell me. Why bother now?"

She was suddenly searching for words, unsure of how to justify herself in front of this sudden storm, "I,...., I just didn't know what........., if I,......., well, what I wanted."

He stared at her stonily, keeping his silence once more, "I wasn't sure because of, well, you know my mother's illness and Eric and that I could pass it on to the baby."

He stood silent still, regarding her as she floundered for words, "I wasn't sure if it was fair, on the baby, on you-"

He cut her off suddenly, "You mean, you weren't sure you wanted a baby who might have bipolar?"

"No, that isn't it, I just-"

"You just what? Didn't wan to put yourself through that, so you'd rather arrange a termination behind my back? Like you did to Richard? What makes this different Abby? Why this baby?"

She was crying despite herself, "I love you, John, I want our baby, no matter if there's something wrong with it or not."

"Then why waste all that time? Thinking about what was right? Or just wondering who you should pin it on, who would call you first, me or Luca?"

He stopped, he'd gone to far. He couldn't believe those words had just come out of his mouth. He had effectively taken Abby from Luca, how could he have accused her-

"Get out." She whispered, turning her back on him.

"Abby, I'm sorry, I don't think that, I was just hurt that you felt you couldn't talk to me. And now I've illustrated why, I'm an idiot, please-"

"Get out, John." She said again, she walked out of the kitchen in her bedroom never glancing behind her, she heard the front door gently click closed and watched him shuffle down to the street to hail a cab. She lay down as she heard the him slam the cab door shut, and that was when the pain hit her. Searing pain in the bass of her stomach, "no, no." She whispered to herself. She managed to pull herself to the corner of the bed, as she did she felt something warm hit her thighs, she was bleeding. She pulled herself upright to look out onto the street, perhaps he was still there, waiting for her to calm down.

The road was empty. She looked down, blood was beginning to pool at her feet, this wasn't right she was bleeding too much even for a miscarriage. Feeling herself begin to panic she knew she had to get to the phone, call john, or someone. As she made her way back into the living room her vision started the black out from the edges. The world was collapsing in on its self, soon it would be gone, she could see her phone, she had it in her hand, she dialled the first number that came into her head. Blackness overtook her.

Having arrived home and paced around for approximately half an hour Carter decided he couldn't leave things how they were. Normally he would leave her to stew or calm down but having acted so monumentally stupidly he HAD to do something. He got in his car and went back to her apartment.

Arriving there he took a breath and steeled himself for her onslaught, he'd given her a good half an hour to find some really good insults for him. He was not prepared for what greeted him.

As he reached her door he could see it was not latched, hairs on the back of his neck stood up, god, was someone inside? Had he left it open? Gingerly he pushed it, his eyes took a moment to adjust to the reality of what he was seeing, and what it meant.

First he noticed the phone, was off the hook, on the floor, he could hear the drone of the dial tone from the receiver. There was a large pool of blood of the floor next to its table, foot prints lead out of it to the door he had just come through, and the wheel marks from a stretcher. Drops of blood marked her path from the bedroom which he followed backwards, again it pooled by the window where she had stood, the bedside table had bee knocked over, the trail started, or ended, on the bedclothes.

His cell phone rang, startling him, "Carter." He snapped into it.

"John?" A quavering voice came at the other end.

In his current state it took him several seconds to place it, "Maggie?" He said, a question more than a statement.

"John? Abby called me, I think, she'd passed out, I didn't know what to do, I called 911 to her apartment, they said she was bleeding, what's going on? Is she OK? Did someone hurt her?"

Yes, I did. He silently replied, outloud, "I don't know, I'm on my way to the hospital."

He could see her through the glass window of the cubicle. He'd guessed she'd by-pass the ER and go straight to OB, he was right. She was laid flat on a gurney, at least two IV's in, nasal cannulae delivered oxygen to her nostrils. She was staring into the middle distance I his direction, but seemed not to have seen him.

She looks so small. He thought to himself. Through one IV He could see she was receiving a blood transfusion, the other looked like normal saline. She was hooked to an ECG and a sats monitor, a fetal monitor lay disregarded in the corner. His heart dropped. Had there been a heart beat when she arrived? Had she had to sit there, bleeding, knowing her body was losing a live baby?

Suddenly he was faced with Dr Coburn, "Carter," she said, "I don't think now is the time for colleagues visiting."

He cleared his throat, "I'm the baby's father. Is Abby OK?"

"Oh, well, she lost a lot of blood, but we seem to have that under control. She gave us a scare, but we didn't need to make any intervention to stop the bleeding. She'll need to stay in for a while, take it easy. We'll be moving her to the ward soon, you can sit with her if you like, please excuse me."

He watched her for a moment longer through the glass. How would she feel seeing him now? Her actions probably told him, alone and bleeding, afraid she had called her mother. Maggie who had never been there for her and in fact lived in Boston. The mother she once had detained by security denying she had even met, yet still she would rather ask help of her than him. He had blown it, completely. He'd accused her of being pregnant with another man's child, now she'd lost what he had no doubt was their baby and it served him right. But not her. She didn't deserve this, and it was all his fault. The best thing he could do for her would be to leave her alone. However much he wanted to go in there and beg for forgiveness and offer whatever solace he could he knew she would not accept it, so he left her there, alone.

Abby stared at the wall in front of her with a million thought running through her head. Carter didn't really think that, did he? She knew it was just tired and frightened talk from him, but it was the kind she was used to hearing from herself. Normally it was her who exaggerated the darker elements of their relationship and their lives in general.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Dr Coburn re-entering.

"How you doing, mom?" She said, closing the door.

Abby raised an eyebrow at her, "Considering why I'm here that's a little premature isn't it Janice?"

She perched on the edge of the bed, "I know you've had a scare, but there's no reason you can't carry this baby to term. The placenta is low, which puts you at risk for further bleeding, but it may well move up before the baby's born. I'm going to have to put you on bed rest for a while, but I don't see why you both won't be fine."

Abby looked at her hands, "When I was younger I had a termination-"

"That has nothing to do with this Abby. These things just happen. If I have to put you in restraints for the next six months to ensure this baby arrives healthy and happy I will, you just need to take care." She hesitated, "I don't think you should be going back to work in the ER-"

"I have to, I don't think the father is going to be around too much, he's convinced it isn't his."

"Really?" She tilted her head to one side, "Carter? I just spoke to him, he seemed pretty sure he's the father to me. Anyway, I'll arrange for you to come work on OB again, where I can keep an eye on you. Do you have someone to stay with you when you get home? I don't want you to be on your own, just in case Abby?"

Her expression lightened and she placed a hand gingerly over her abdomen, "I won't be, I'll be taking my baby home with me."

To be continued...