November 2nd, 2006
Michael was dead and it was his entire fault. Bosco felt guilty beyond belief. He should have left sooner. He should have called a bus on his way. Angela blamed him too. You should have been the responsible older brother, Maurice. You should have gone to him sooner, Maurice. You helped my baby die, Maurice. How dare you be like that?
Bosco sat in bed staring out the window. The day was grey and dreary, much like how his soul felt. Sure Michael had a lot of problems but he was his brother. Bosco should have helped him.
"Papa." Sydney sat at his feet. Bosco looked down at his granddaughter sadly. "Papa, up!" She extended her arms up to him.
"Come here, Sydney." He picked her up and cradled her close. "You're getting so big and heavy." He sighed deeply as he kissed her brown curls. Emily stood in the doorway watching them.
"Not even Sydney can bring a smile to your face." She said.
"Was she supposed to?" Bosco asked. Sydney snuggled into her grandfather as she sucked upon her thumb. Emily nodded.
"Yeah she was." She walked into the room; "We're all worried about you." Bosco glanced at her.
"There's no reason for you or anyone else to be worried." Bosco said, "If you sent Sydney in here so you could give me a lecture, then you can have her back. I don't want a lecture."
"That's not why I'm here." Emily said sitting on the bed.
"Then why are you here, Emily? DO you need money?" He asked.
"No." She chuckled, "I just wanted to make sure you were okay. You haven't been out and about much lately. You're taking Uncle Mikey's death pretty hard."
"Well, He's my brother. Of course I am, Emmie." Bosco frowned.
"It's been two weeks and you haven't left the bedroom." Emily commented, "That's not really healthy. You need to get out."
"I don't want to." Bosco growled at her, looking at Sydney.
"Why?" She asked softly.
"Because they wont stop looking at me. Ma is. Faith is. Even Ty is…Everyone… They all look at me differently ow as if I have the plague. I don't. I lost my brother because I was too naïve to realize he needed help. Everyone keeps reminding me that." Bosco choked out. Emily frowned deeply as she looked at him.
"I don't look at you differently." She said softly. "I know you didn't purposely mean to leave Uncle Mikey like that. I know how he used to be. Mom knows how he used to be and so does Grandma B. It's going to take a long time for her to be okay. She lost her child. Imagine how you would feel if Vincent died. You would be blaming anyone you could. You would be devastated. She's not mad at you. She knows who was in the right and who was in the wrong." Bosco looked at Emily. When did she become so smart?
"I just want this pain to go away." Bosco said trying not to start crying. He couldn't do that in front of Emily. She shouldn't even have to see him like this. He was supposed to be strong in front of her and Sydney.
"It will, It promise." Emily said softly. Sydney opened her eyes and looked at Bosco. He smiled slightly down at her. "See? That's what we have missed."
"Is your ma really worried about me?" He asked her. Emily nodded slowly.
"Yeah. She's been really worried. She's the one who called me to come over. Mom's afraid she might be loosing you. She thinks you're pulling away from her." Emily said. Bosco sighed slightly as he got up.
"I guess I should talk to her then. I don't want her thinking that." He said handing Sydney back over to Emily. He smiled at her. "Thanks, Emmie."
"No problem. Glad I could help some." She said. He nodded.
"You helped a lot." Bosco said softly. Emily smiled at him.
Faith stood at the stove stirring the cranberries. She wanted to try to make some homemade cranberry sauce. It was her test run before Thanksgiving. If she screwed it up this time now, she could see what she did wrong and fix it.
"Smells good in here." Bosco said as he walked into the kitchen. Faith spun around with wide eyes.
"What are you doing here?" She asked him. He couldn't help but to laugh.
"I believe I live here." He said, "My kitchen." Faith nodded.
"I mean...You haven't been down here in awhile." She said.
"I know. I was starting to smell." Bosco walked to the fridge and opened it up. Faith looked at Emily who gave her mother a wink and left.
"Are you feeling okay?" Faith asked. Bosco nodded as he took out some ice-cream.
"Perfect now. How are you feeling?" He asked.
"Tired, but okay." She put her spoon down, "Are you really okay?" Bosco nodded as he turned to look at her.
"I'm sorry I've been a bad husband these past couple of weeks." He said. Faith looked at him.
"You haven't been horrible husband. You've been grieving and you have every single right to grieve, sweetheart." She said.
"You're not mad that I've been distant?" he asked her.
"Absolutely not." Faith smiled softly walking up to him, "but I am sure glad to have you back." Faith hugged her husband tightly. She knew it would be awhile until he was more accepting of Michael's death. Bosco would eventually be okay.
November 16th, 2006
The water pounded on Faith's body. Her body was so sore from her long shift at work. Hostage situations were always hard to wind down from. She groaned loudly as she stretched her back.
"Need sleep." She grunted as she grabbed her shower gel that Bosco had bought her for her birthday. The shower was immediately filled with the smell of raspberry. Faith started to wash her legs and body. Maybe she needed a nice massage to work out all these knots.
Her hands skimmed over her stomach and up to her chest. Bosco should be doing this to her. She smiled as she washed her breasts. Her hand stopped as she touched her left breast. Her heart pounded in chest as she pressed her fingers into it. She felt it. She felt hardness beneath her fingers. The hardness was about the size of a nickel.
"OH god…." Faith's hands were trembling as she shut the water off. She stepped out of the shower and immediately walked into the bedroom. Bosco was grinning from ear to ear.
"This is how I like my women." Bosco said walking up to her.
"Give me your hand." She whispered.
"My pleasure." He chuckled.
"This is serious, Maurice." Faith said taking his hand and pressing it to the lump she felt just moments ago. Bosco's smile faded. "D-Do you feel that? Do you feel it too, Maurice?" Bosco stared at his wife. She was calling him Maurice. She had fear dancing in her eyes. He nodded very slowly. Her lip trembled.
"Get dressed. I'm taking you to the hospital." He said. Faith shook her head.
"I'll make an appointment in the morning. Let's just lay down." She said. Bosco glared at her.
"No! I'm taking you in now!" He cried, "I've lost too many people this year. I'm not about to loose my wife too."
"You're not going to loose me." Faith said.
"Good. Now get dressed." He said walking out of the room calling Charlie's name. Faith sighed deeply as she pulled her underwear on. She shouldn't have told him. She should have just made an appointment in the morning and done it privately.
* * *
Faith sat on the hospital bed holding Bosco's hand tightly. They had been here for two hours and had already been through hell. They had drawn so much blood and fluid. They had poked and prodded Faith all over her body. She even had several scans.
"Do you want some coffee or anything?" Bosco asked softly.
"No." Faith croaked. Bosco sighed deeply, "What do you think that they'll say?"
"Honestly?" He asked softly. Faith nodded. "I think…I think that they will tell us that you need to take it easy for awhile."
"Oh Bosco…" Faith started to cry softly looking at the wall. He sighed.
"Or they could tell us that it's just a cyst." He said wrapping his arm around her shoulders. Dr. Clearly knocked on the door and walked in.
"Mrs. Boscorelli?" He said softly. Faith looked up at him with sad eyes.
"Did you look at my tests?" She asked him softly. Dr. Clearly nodded. "What did they say?" Bosco rubbed Faith's back. His heart was racing. Please tell me that my wife is going to be okay, Bosco thought. Dr. Clearly pulled up a chair and looked at them.
"I want to schedule in a few weeks." He said. Faith's eyes widened.
"It's…It's Cancer?" She whispered. Dr. Clearly nodded. "Oh god." Bosco stared at the doctor.
"You're wrong. You're completely wrong! My wife isn't sick!" He snapped. "Look again! She's not!"
"It' all right, Bosco." Faith whispered.
"It's not okay!!" He cried. His chest felt like a ton of bricks were lying upon it. "I'm not going to loose you!!! I'm not going to loose someone else I love!!!" Bosco gasped for air. He pulled his inhaler out and took it. Faith touched his arm as his lungs finally started to fill back up with air.
"You're working yourself up. Calm down." She said softly.
"Mr. Boscorelli, we should have caught it soon enough before it spread to the lymph nodes. We'll go in and remove her breast." Faith's eyes widened as Dr. Clearly spoke, "Then she'll have another round of Chemo to get any cancer we may have missed."
"M-My breast? You're t-taking all of it?" She gulped.
"We have to. We may have caught it before it spread to the lymph nodes, but it is pretty big." He said, "After the surgery we can talk about reconstructive surgery."
"I c-cant go through this again. I can't go through Chemotherapy again." She whimpered, "I thought I w-was pass all of this."
"When was the last time you went to your oncologist?" Dr. Clearly asked. Bosco started to pace back and forth. This wasn't happening. He refused to loose Faith. She was turning forty In December. She shouldn't have to spend it worrying about cancer.
"Wh-When I was pregnant…About…Almost four years ago." Faith whispered, "I haven't been back since. I've been s-so b-busy w-with V-Vincent ad w-work…and m-my n-new grand d-daughter." Faith started to sob into her hands. Dr. Clearly nodded as he stood up.
"I'll get everything read and schedule your surgery. You can get ready to go home." He said softly. Bosco nodded as he left. He turned his tear filled eyes to his wife.
"H-He's only three. He c-cant loose me yet." She sobbed.
"Don't talk like that, Faith! Vinny won't loose you." Bosco said gathering Faith into his arms.
"Wh-What am I going to tell the kids?" She whispered.
"We'll tell them the truth. They need to know the truth." Bosco said softly as he rubbed her back.
"Oh god." Her entire body trembled. Faith clung to him tightly. Bosco ran his hand through her hair. He hoped she would be able to keep this hair. He hoped she would be able to work. He knew she would fall apart if she didn't have work, like she did last time. He lost Mikey, but he wouldn't loose his wife. They had been through so much, but they had many years ahead of them to be together. Bosco refused to believe that Faith might slip away from him.
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