Chapter Thirty-One

Moonlight Misfortune

(Subtitled – The Part We ALL Hate!)

Crookshanks led the way down the tunnel.

Remus, who was next in line, glanced over his shoulder at Peter.  He was whimpering and it was starting to irritate Remus.  When they were younger, Peter would take to whimpering and whining until he got Remus or James or Sirius to do something for him.  Remus knew that at this very moment Peter's sighs and moans were all an effort to try to get Remus to rethink his decision.    But Remus just fixed him with a long, cold stare.  That shut him up.

Behind Peter was Ron, stumbling over the rocky ground, managing the best he could.  Remus knew his leg must be throbbing, but he also knew why Ron needed to be the one keeping an eye on Peter.  And Remus wasn't going to deny him this right.

Behind the conjoined trio floated Snape, suspended in the air by his own wand, which Sirius now held.  Every now and again Snape's head would bump into the ceiling of the tunnel.  Remus suspected that this was not entirely unintentional, and gave Sirius a look.  Sirius shrugged innocently, and muttered something about being a bit out of practice.

Trailing behind them all were Hermione and Harry.   Hermione had been so clever in the shack.  She really was an amazing student.  And Harry – well, it was quite appropriate that James' son was a part of this procession that would finally see justice done. 

The magnitude of the events of the evening was starting to settle in Remus' heart.  Sirius was innocent and would soon be set free.  This meant so much, not only for Sirius but also for Harry.  The two of them would have such different lives from now on.

And so would Remus.  It meant the world to him to have his friend back. 

Sirius' voice came softly from behind.  "You know what this means?" he said to Harry.  "Turning Pettigrew in?"

"You're free."

Remus smiled.

"Yes…. But I'm also – I don't know if anyone ever told you – I'm your godfather."

"Yeah, I knew that."

He knew about that? I wonder why he never asked me about it?   

"Well…your parents appointed me your guardian.  If anything happened to them…"

Sirius paused a moment.  Remus turned to look at him.  Meeting his eyes, Remus urged him to go on.

Sirius continued tentatively.  "I'll understand, of course, if you want to stay with your aunt and uncle.  But…well…think about it.  Once my name's cleared…if you wanted a…a different home…"

"What – live with you?"  Harry sounded dumbfounded.  "Leave the Dursleys?"

"Of course, I thought you wouldn't want to.  I understand, I just thought I'd –"

"Are you insane?  Of course I want to leave the Dursleys!  Have you got a house?  When can I move in?"

Remus nearly laughed out loud.  Harry apparently shared his father's opinion of Lily's sister and her husband.

"You want to?  You mean it?"

"Yeah, I mean it!"

Remus saw Sirius smile.  It was a full, honest, true smile.  Remus smiled as well, and couldn't seem to remember the last time he felt so happy – so confident – so free.  It really was liberating knowing the full truth of what happened all those years ago.  And it was wonderful having one of his friends back. 

They reached the mouth of the tunnel and crawled out one by one.   As they pulled Snape out, no one bothered to make sure he was particularly comfortable.  He would have cuts and bruises all over, but that didn't seem to matter much.  If Snape had only been able to control his hatred of Sirius and look at the evidence, he wouldn't be in this situation.  Remus felt very little pity for him.

Once they were all out, they started towards the castle.  Peter whimpered again and fidgeted with his manacles.

"One wrong move, Peter," warned Remus, pointing his wand at Peter's chest.

The cool breeze sent a chill through Remus' body.  Something wasn't right.  Remus glanced around at the forest looking for…something.  The forest was almost still, just the faintest rustling of trees moving in the wind.  It was very dark, and hard to see the ground underfoot.     The only light came from the castle of in the distance.  Remus looked up.  There were so few stars shining tonight due to the cloudy sky.  You couldn't even see the moon…

The moon!

OH GOD!

His eyes darted to a shifting cloud – and the full moon that hid behind it!

His voice caught in his throat and his body froze.  He felt the familiar pull – the tightening in his stomach – the pain in his bones.

He could feel the wolf rising within him, struggling to get out.  

He wanted to scream.  He couldn't remember taking the potion!  Sirius – Harry – they were all in danger!  Remus struggled to get the words out, and failed.

Run!

Somewhere someone was yelling.  Was it Sirius?  It sounded very far away.

He felt his body stiffen and then stretch.  Pain ripped through his body.  He threw his head back, howling in agony. 

No matter how much Remus fought it, the change was unstoppable.  And the wolf was angry.  The wolf had been kept in check for too long.  He wanted out!  He was ready to attack!  Remus couldn't control him tonight.  The smell of flesh filled his nostrils as the wolf snarled and cried out.   Animal instinct and fury replaced human emotion.  The last conscious thought Remus had was that he needed to get away from the group before he hurt someone.  The wolf ripped at the manacles and was free.

And Remus knew no more.

***

My head hurts.

Remus was lying on the ground, quite uncomfortably.  He didn't quite know where he was or how he got there.  He felt something poking him in the back and slowly rolled over to move away from whatever it was.  A sharp pain ripped through his side and he groaned in agony.

He was outside.  He was suddenly very aware of the earth underneath him and the rock that kept poking him in the back.  How did I get outside? Remus struggled against grey fog, trying to make sense of where he was.

Very slowly, he blinked his eyes open.  The sun was barely rising and the dim orange light shadowed the forest.  The forest?  How did I…

Remus opened his eyes wide as the memory hit him hard.  He had transformed.   Without the aid of the Wolfsbane Potion.  And Harry and Sirius and…

Oh God!

Remus pulled a shaking hand up to his forehead.  There was a deep gash across the right side and blood had hardened around the cut.  His shoulder ached with pain as well.  His skin was ripped – torn – as if he had been bitten.  He touched the mark tenderly and remembered…Sirius.  Sirius must have transformed into Padfoot to keep the wolf away from the children.  In doing so, Padfoot must have bitten his shoulder.

Remus wondered what kind of damage Moony had inflicted on Padfoot.

He sank down onto his back.  "Oh…what have I done…" he mumbled.  He licked his lips and tasted blood.  Blood…in his mouth. 

Oh sweet Merlin---NO….

He instantly felt ill and rolled onto his side.  His body stiffened and he gave a mighty heave, but his stomach was empty.  Sick and shaking, Remus was flooded with a sour relief that at least he'd not eaten anything…or anyone.  One touch of his hand to his mouth told him that his lip was  split and swollen. 

Maybe….maybe I haven't bitten anyone.

Remus desperately replayed the events of last night in his head.  He could remember beginning to transform.  Someone shouted, and it must have been Sirius.  Yes, it was a warning.  Sirius told everyone to run.  But Ron and Peter…they were chained to me.  He remembered ripping the manacle off his own leg, but he could not seem to get a clear image of what happened to the others.   He also knew he had dropped his wand. 

Dropped my wand…

Which means that Peter wasn't being covered.

He…he didn't…he couldn't have…

In that instant he knew that his own carelessness had probably given Peter the chance to get away.  And the stars only knew what happened to Sirius.  Remus could only hope everyone was all right.   

He moaned and wiped the spittle off his mouth.  What a disgrace he was - lying in the dirt bruised and bloodied.  His robes were a torn, shredded mess.  His wand lost.   And the castle was very far away.

He could see it far off in the distance.  He could even hear people's voices.  But there was no use in trying to walk to the castle.  He would never make it.  Remus could not remember ever feeling as tired as he did right then.  He just wanted to sleep.   But the voices in the distance kept him in reality.

They were looking for him.  Of course, they would be.  Best take a werewolf right after the transformation, when it is at its weakest.    He deserved to be locked up for his mistake.  No, not locked up – but executed.  The voices boomed, nearer.  Remus idly wondered if there would be a trial before his execution.    

Not voices…but one voice.  Calling for…him?

"Professor Lupin!"

Remus lifted up to have a look.

"Professor Lupin!" the voice called again.

"Hagrid?"  The giant man came into view, still yelling out for him.

"Professor Lupin!" he called again.

"Over…"  He coughed, phlegm stuck in his throat.  "Over here!"

Hagrid spotted him and ran towards him.  "Bloody hell."

"Couldn't have described it better myself."

"I didn' mean it like tha'."

"I know you didn't, Hagrid." 

Hagrid bent over and slowly helped Remus stand up.  He was unsteady on his feet and would have fallen over, had Hagrid not caught him.  "Professor Dumbledore sent me out t' find you.  Said you'd be needin' some help."

Remus looked up at his face.  "Thank you, Hagrid."

"Don' mention it.  I've bin in bad situations myself.  Never refused help when it's bein' offered."

They made their way up to the castle slowly and carefully.  Remus had so many questions, but he wasn't sure just how much Hagrid knew.  He'd obviously been told that Remus was out on the grounds, but was that the extent of his knowledge?  Since Remus wasn't too certain about what exactly happened last night, he figured it would be best if he kept quiet.

Once inside the castle, Remus asked if they were heading to the hospital wing.  Hagrid informed him that Dumbledore wanted to speak with him right away.  The idea of facing Dumbledore both worried and comforted Remus.  He would have the chance to explain – and have things explained to him as well. 

Trudging up the steps to the Headmaster's office, Remus licked his lips once again.  The taste of blood was still in his mouth.  It was his blood; he knew that now.  But what if it hadn't been?  What if he had managed to get a hold of something last night?  What if he had bitten an innocent person and inflicted this curse on someone else?  It was his greatest fear in all the world – and it had almost come to fruition due to his carelessness. 

How could he have ever thought he was safe enough to be around these children?  How could he ever be trusted by anyone ever again?  He put too many lives in danger last night, and he never wanted that to happen again.  He would never take that chance again.  His mind was made up on this matter.  Once he arrived in Dumbledore's office, he would resign.

AN: I saved my notes for the end!  Thanks to Durayan and Alkari for the beta read.  If you are upset by Barfing!Remus, blame Durayan!  She dared me to do it, not thinking that I would.  If ever Remus needed SOUP! It would be now!  And I thought you might like to know that I'm guessing the fic will be 35 chapters and an epilogue – so not much more to go!  YEAH!