Valentine's Day.
The most hated day for our dearly beloved Potions master and his absolutely adorable apprentice (ALLITERATION!!).
So, it only stands to reason that these two 'lovebirds' be spending such a holiday in the confines of Snape's office. Snape never left his dungeons, deciding that the only time he will make an appearance will be during the Quidditch match. After all, Slytherin was playing Gryffindor, and he'd spent days telling Hermione how Gryffindor was going to get slaughtered. An argument ensued, and it ended with one Severus Snape making a bet with one Hermione Granger.
*Flashback*
"Ummm. Hermione?" Severus asked, watching the student sitting on the floor in the corner of the room, book on the floor, and her head propped up on hands supported by her elbows. This wouldn't have been so unusual if she wasn't scratching the top of her head with the nail of her big toe.
"Hmmm?" She asked, looking up from the book she was reading. She'd asked him earlier if it was all right for her to bring down a small blanket so she could read while on the floor when they weren't experimenting. She said it helped her to concentrate more.
"What are you doing?" Severus asked, watching as the leg got back into a 'normal' position.
"Reading." She responded, looking back down at the book.
"I meant with your leg."
Hermione looked back up at him. "What are you talking about?" She asked, turning her head slightly to look at her legs, making sure they were still in once piece. Severus wasn't quite sure they were.
"I mean you've been sitting there scratching your head with your toes." He replied. "Last time I checked, limbs weren't supposed to move like that."
"Oh, usually they don't, unless you exercise them to." She said, going back to her book. "It's become a habit of mine when I'm studying. Usually wards off people from bugging me because it absolutely grosses them out."
"What types of exercises do you do, and why would you?" Severus asked, slightly curious as to what other positions she could do. 'Down boy!' He thought.
"It's called yoga. It's actually very calming. Helps me to deal with stress better. Why do you think I'm so calm around test time now?" She asked.
"I figured it was because of your extreme studying. I guess there are other things you need to be stressed out about. Example, Quidditch."
"Are you going to start with that crap again?" Hermione snapped, looking back up at him. She caught the amusement in his eye.
"You just call it crap because you know that Slytherin will win." Severus replied.
"No offence to dear Draco, Severus. But Harry could catch the snitch before Malfoy if he gave him a thirty-second head start. Not to mention the fact that your beaters can't aim for the other team properly. How many times did Shilly Sit hit his teammates during your last game?"
"Ah. But we've got a new beater." Severus reminded her.
"You know, now that I think of it, having that Jessica Jablowmee as beater sounds pretty sick." Hermione pointed out.
"You're getting off topic. The point is is that Slytherin will defeat Gryffindor, and no golden boy will stop us."
"You wanna bet?" Hermione asked.
"I don't make bets, Hermione. Wastes too much energy." Severus replied, looking back down at his tomes.
"Cause you're afraid that you're wrong."
Severus looked up. "You calling me afraid?" Hermione nodded, smirking slightly. "I repeat, Miss Granger." He continued in his most threatening tone, "Are you calling me afraid?"
His tone no longer worked on her. She smirked even more, nodding her head. "I calls'em as I sees'em, Professor Snape." She replied.
He thought for a moment. "Terms! Now!"
"If Gryffindor wins, you have to try and get a dance with Hagrid at the Valentine's Day ball tonight." She said. He paled slightly.
"I will do nothing of the sort." He said, and quickly added, "There's nothing wrong with it, but I refuse to entertain your homosexual fantasies. Pick something else."
Hermione absentmindedly brought her foot up again and began to scratch her head as she thought of something else. She didn't see Severus' eyes start following said foot, but he didn't see the amused expression on her face when she noticed the path his eyes took. She stopped scratching her head, and began to wave her foot around, wondering if he'd notice she was doing that on purpose. He didn't. She stopped waving her foot after a few minutes, bringing it further towards her eyes and watched as his eyes followed. When he realized she was watching him, he cleared his throat and looked away.
"Okay. If Gryffindor wins, you owe me a dance tonight." Hermione finally said. "Wearing crimson robes."
"I thought you hated Valentine's Day." Severus said. "And I will not wear a Gryffindor colour.
"I do. But most likely we'll both be dragged down there, much to our displeasure. And if anybody asks, you could at least say you lost a bet." She replied.
"Fair enough. If Slytherin wins, than you have to show me some more of this 'yoga'. If it's a great way to deal with stress, I might need it." He said.
"Deal." She said. He walked towards her. She held out her hand to shake his, but he grabbed her foot instead and shook it instead. She started to giggle.
"Are you ticklish, Hermione?" Severus asked.
"Are you suicidal, Severus?" Hermione asked, giving him a glare that said 'don't even think about it!'
He didn't think about it. He just started to tickle. Hermione was left screeching in laughter on the floor, begging him to stop. He did eventually, and left Hermione gasping for breath on the floor. "I'll get you for that!"
*End Flashback*
So it was just after lunch that he had donned his Slytherin scarf and made his way out to the Quidditch pitch. He'd supervised some of the team practices and decided, with Jessica as their new beater, that Gryffindor would have a very serious run for their money. Sitting in the box reserved for teachers, he made sure that he sat near Professor McGonagall; but not too close. He was confident that Slytherin would win, but he wouldn't want to take the chance of having Minerva brag endlessly about how well Gryffindor could be doing.
He waited for the game to begin.
~@~
Hermione sat in the Gryffindor section of the Quidditch pitch, wearing her usual Gryffindor winter attire. She'd spent some of the time away from researching watching the practices on the pitch since her bet with the potions master. From the looks of the strategies that they had come up with, Slytherin would be blown away. The only concern was what Jessica's talent was. She had become the new beater for the Slytherin team, and Hermione had never seen her performance on a broom.
She took a deep breath, and waited for the game to begin.
~@~
"AND NOW TAKING TO THE AIR; GRYFFINDOR!" The cheers rose as the seven Gryffindors came out onto the pitch. "HARRY POTTER, SEEKER AND TEAM CAPTAIN. RON WEASLEY AND SEAMUS FINNEGAN, BEATERS. TANSIA RAIDER, CORDIAL NUTTS, AND YVONNE CARD, CHASERS. AND NOYU MAYNAUGHT, KEEPER." The cheers rose even louder as the team performed formations over the Quidditch pitch. They kept their moves simple, so as to keep their focus on the game.
"AND NOW; SLYTHERIN!" The cheers that had died down once again rose. The games between these two houses were always spectacular. "DRACO MALFOY, SEEKER AND TEAM CAPTAIN. GREGORY GOYLE AND JESSICA JABLOWMEE, BEATERS. YESI AMAVICH, CARSON PLAYHOOF, AND VINCENT CRABBE, CHASERS. AND TOBY SMELLI, KEEPER." The Slytherins did a more elaborate formation over the pitch, surprisingly making more of a display than the Gryffindors did.
"PLAYERS! TAKE YOUR MARKS!" The players positioned themselves as Madame Hooch made her appearance at the centerline to start. Grabbing the Quaffle, she looked up to ensure the players were in their legal positions, and threw the ball into play. It was Yesi who first grabbed the quaffle, darting past Yvonne, as she made her way towards the Gryffindor goal posts. She didn't get far though. She swerved to avoid getting hit by a bludger, and lost her grip on the quaffle. Tansia caught it and made his way back over to the Slytherin side, darting past Goyle, but not quick enough to avoid having the quaffle smacked out of his own grasp. It was luckily caught by Harry and thrown towards Cordial. It was intercepted by Toby, who dropped it into the hands of Carson. Carson flew back over to the Gryffindor goal posts, and made a desperate toss to one of the rings before a bludger nearly knocked him off his broom. The toss was intercepted by Noyu, and tossed back to Yvonne, who darted quickly past Crabbe. Making her way back over to the Slytherin side, she was intercepted by Jessica. Jessica threw the ball up to Toby, who immediately tossed it back to Yesi to get it away from their own rings. Yesi made his way over to the Gryffindor side, tossing the quaffle back and forth between himself and Carson. At the last toss, Yvonne was in position to intercept it from Carson, when it was thrown to Crabbe, who seemed to come from nowhere, instead. He made to toss the ball to the ring closest, but than tossed it to the ring furthest once Noyu got too close, scoring the first goal of the game.
Hermione nearly groaned but reminded herself that the game was still early, and neither Harry nor Draco had spotted the snitch as of yet. She could tell that Severus had a smirk on his face right now.
~@~
The game lasted over three hours.
Slytherin won!
Hermione gave her congratulations to Draco and Jessica before leaving to see how Ron and Harry were doing. She made her way back to the Gryffindor common room. Her housemates were patting the players on the back, despite the fact they lost. It was an amazing game, and both teams had fought hard. In the end, both teams were tied, and a bludger had thrown Harry off course in a head on race with Draco for the snitch. While Harry was momentarily distracted, Draco caught it.
It seemed that everyone was still heavy into the post game activities, and she made her way down to the dungeons to face the music, promising Ginny (who nagged her for days on end) that she would return with plenty of time to get ready for the Valentine's Day ball.
She approached the dungeon, imagining the size of Severus' smirk when she arrived. They would set up a time when she would show him the moves. Approaching the door, she mentally berated herself for the millionth time since the end of the game for making the bet. Didn't she learn anything from betting with Draco and Harry? It caused enough problems. She raised her hand and knocked on the door.
"Enter."
Opening the door, Severus didn't need to turn to know who was there. "Miss Granger, please close the door." She did so, walking over to the seat she usually occupied. He turned and looked at her. "I must admit." He started. "I very well nearly fell out of the box today." She started to giggle at the thought.
"That was a close one." She replied.
"Very. And now that I have been proven right."
"Ah yes. The terms." Hermione rolled her eyes, waiting for her fate.
"Since we do research on Mondays and Thursdays, I think Wednesdays would be good for these yoga lessons." Severus said. "Any objections?"
"No, sir. I look forward to seeing what you can do." Hermione said, blushing slightly when she realized just how badly that could have sounded.
Severus seemed to not take notice. "Very well than." He said. "I have no doubt that you will be at the ball this evening. The Headmaster has made it clear that the faculty attendance is required, no matter how much I have nagged him. Unless you were able to dissuade your friends from pushing you to go."
"No such luck, I'm afraid." She replied. "At least you won't be the only one suffering."
"Indeed."
~@~
"Oh Hermione! You look GORGEOUS!!" Ginny squealed as Hermione came out of the bathroom, full makeup and dress. Ginny had done her hair for her. Most of her hair flowing down with a loose bun gracing the top of the back of her head, very light makeup, and deep purple robes, flowing gracefully to the floor. Over all, simple; but it all fit rather nicely.
"I hate going through all this crap. I could be spending the night reading and studying for NEWTs." Hermione complained.
"Oh shush. You should do this more often." Ginny replied, putting the finishing touches on her own hair.
"I'm only thankful that I can at least get away without any underwear." Hermione said absentmindedly. She looked up to a wide-eyed Ginny. "What? It can be very restricting sometimes."
"I'm so glad I'm not alone there." Ginny finally said.
~@~
Hermione, Ginny, Harry, and Ron all entered the Great Hall for the Valentine's Day ball. They would meet up with Draco and Jessica soon. They noticed Neville and Dannie were a bit preoccupied as they approached the Hall. They decided to not disturb them. The teachers would get them to cool off later.
When they entered the Hall, they noticed that all the house tables had been moved from the room, and only a few smaller tables had been lined along the walls. The ceiling showed off the gorgeous snowfall outside; large flakes floating down about halfway in the room and the occasional star could be seen through the clouds.
The guys left the gals at a table to chat while they went off to cause a ruckus. Before they left, they gave the girls a few words of advice; stay away from the punch bowl, and don't eat the candy. After promising that it was all in good fun and no one would end up in the hospital wing seriously harmed, the girls promised that they would not divulge their plans.
Lavender, Pavarti, and Pansy soon joined the group, getting Ginny in a heated argument about the dangers of using magic on your hair. Hermione and Jessica looked from each other, back to the group, and than at each other again before nodding and deciding to leave them to their debate.
"Where are you guys off to?" Pansy asked.
"The astronomy tower." Jessica replied.
"Why would you want to go there?" Ginny asked.
"Cause we want to make out." Hermione said, the two girls walking away from the group. Although Jessica enjoyed Valentine's Day, she couldn't stomach all the 'beauty banter' those girls usually had. They got to the other side of the Great Hall where they met up with Dannie.
"Where's Neville?" Jessica asked. "You two are usually never parted unless force by unforgivable is used."
"He's just grabbing some punch for us." Dannie replied.
"Uh oh!" Jessica said.
"What?"
"Don't drink the punch, whatever you do." Hermione said. Dannie looked up to where Neville had gone and could see him returning with two small cups. She didn't know what happened to the punch, but would take no chances. Especially since both a Gryffindor and a Slytherin had warned her. As Neville neared them, she was about to tell him not to drink the punch, but it was too late. Just as she opened her mouth, Neville brought one of the cups up to his mouth and took a big gulp.
"Ummm. Neville, hon?" Dannie said.
"Yes?" Neville asked.
"Come with me." She said, grabbing his hand, and pulling him out of the Great Hall. Jessica and Hermione could see the big grin on his face as he allowed himself to be led out.
"What do you suppose will happen?" Jessica asked.
Both girls were startled by a high-pitched scream. Looking in the direction it came from, they could make out that Noyu Maynaught was looking around the group wide-eyed, and was beet red in the face. She than looked down at her self, hugged herself, and ran from the Great Hall, screaming that she could never show her face around the school again.
Hermione was absolutely confused, and looked over at Jessica, who had a look of dawning realization.
"Oh Merlin. He didn't!" She exclaimed quietly.
"Who didn't? And what didn't they do?" Hermione asked.
"Draco. You remember when Craven Moorehed came on New Years?" She asked. Hermione shook her head. "Oh yeah! You were sick that night, weren't you?" Jessica continued, trying to mask the guilt. "Craven Moorehed was one of my father's college buddies who used to play pranks on everyone. He thought that the party at New Year's was rather tame, and told Draco about some of the gags he used to pull at Oxford. I've heard all the stories, and Draco told me that he would love to do some of them. I told him he didn't have the guts."
Hermione looked at him. "Jessica. No offense. But that was pretty stupid on your part."
Jessica feigned hurt for a moment, than smiled. "Yeah. But than again, I don't know Draco as well as you do. Well, I don't know his personality as much as you do." She said with a mischievous look on her face.
"What did he do anyway?" Hermione asked.
"Have you learned about the sense sensitivity potions?" She asked, not missing the slight blush Hermione got on her cheeks as she nodded. "It's a variation on the sight sensitivity potion, whereas the person who ingests it can actually see through certain materials."
Hermione needed to more explanation. Hermione was about to ask how long it should last for when Draco came up to the pair. "Did you see Noyu? I wonder what happened to her."
"Don't play ignorant, Draco." Hermione said.
Draco turned to Jessica. "You told her, didn't you."
Jessica looked up at him. "Of course I did. If some of the guys here figured out that they weren't actually naked, well, those with more decency anyway, I should at least warn her to cover up."
"First, I don't think you'll find many guys who have decency here when it comes to looking at naked chicks. Second, I don't think they'd stay around. There are an equal amount of guys here." Draco said. "Anyway, have you guys seen Ron?"
"Nope. Why?"
"No reason." Draco said. He held out his hand to Jessica as the music started up. "Care for a dance, mi'lady?"
"Why good sir!" Jessica said. "Of course." Draco smiled, and waited for Jessica to place her hand in his. He was slightly taken aback when Jessica grabbed Hermione around the waist, and the two girls made their way to the dance floor. He watched the two of them for a moment as they started dancing, before smiling again and shaking his head. He tapped Hermione on the shoulder. "May I cut in?"
"No thanks. I'm quite comfortable." Hermione said.
"Jessica?" Draco tried again. He missed the glance Jessica made over his shoulder at the Great Hall entrance.
"And miss the groping action? Hermione. You have great hands." Jessica said. Both looked completely serious.
"It's all the potions work I do. Keeps the fingers strong while allowing them to remain graceful and delicate." She said with a straight face. Hermione lifted her head off of Jessica's shoulder. The two girls looked at each other for a few moments before slowly inching closer. Draco's eyes were widening each centimeter they moved. Just as their lips were about to touch, they looked over at Draco, and nearly collapsed in laughter.
Draco was literally wide-eyed and drooling. He snapped out of his trance. "Damn. Can I join?" They started to laugh again. Draco held out his hand to Jessica once again. "Seriously." He said.
"Certainly." Jessica replied, taking his hand.
"Jessica!" Hermione said in mock rage. "Did it all mean nothing to you?"
"I'm sorry Hermione. You're a nice gal and all, but I prefer to cross dressing type." Draco looked at her in surprise. "What? You spend more time in the bathroom than half the girls in my dorm."
"You are so mean."
"Yup."
"That's cool." He whispered before letting go of her waist, and spinning her around once before latching on again. "Don't mind in the bit."
Hermione shook her head, and turned to make her way back to the table where Ginny and Pansy were talking. As soon as she turned though, there stood the potions master, wearing his usual black, scowl firmly in place.
"Miss Granger."
"Professor?"
Scowl softening slightly, he held out his hand. "May I have this dance?"
Hermione nodded and lifted her hand up into his, her other hand went to his shoulder. His arm snaked around her waist as the song continued. "Finally got dragged down here, hmmm?" She asked.
"Of course. I didn't expect to hide from the Headmaster for long. I did not, however, miss your interesting exchange with Miss Jablowmee." He said, voice lowering.
"Jessica has had an interesting influence on me. You should've seen the look on Draco's face." She replied.
"I expect it was the same look any male within five feet of you two had." Severus replied.
Hermione looked up at him. She could see the amusement in his eyes. "I know. I've been told I can be pretty bad. You probably had the same expression." She said. "By the way, how come you're dancing with me? I lost the bet, remember?"
Severus leaned down slowly. "This just happens to be an added bonus to my winnings, Miss Granger." He growled softly into her ear. He allowed some air to blow gently across the lobe before he straightened up. The song ended, and Hermione, who became a bit flustered after that, had regained her composure.
"Thank you for the dance, Miss Granger." He said, bowing slightly before walking to the head table.
~@~
It was after the ball that found Hermione making her way to the kitchen. She didn't eat much that day, except for the crow after the Quidditch match. Deciding to grab a piece of fruit before returning to her dorm, she approached the portrait of the fruit bowl. Tickling the pear, she walked through the opened entrance, and stopped once she got a look at the kitchens.
They were empty. Not a house elf to be seen. This was strange. Suddenly, a loud clatter which sounded like a bunch of pots and pans being thrown about made her jump, but she remained silent. Whoever was there, it didn't sound like she should make her presence known until she knew there was no danger. She could hear a voice.
It sounded like Dobby! He was muttering something, but it was quiet, not sounding at all like there was any danger. But you never could tell for sure. She snuck to the corner that led to the main kitchen area, and cautiously poked her head around. The scene that awaited her was too shocking to realize.
There was Ron, leaning on the counter with his elbows, and Dobby was floating behind him. And their movements looked. . .AHHHHH!
Her shock began to dissipate somewhat, and some of the muddled words coming from Dobby started to become clearer. "Dobby helps friend of Harry Potter." He was saying. Ron, whose eyes were closed, was sweating slightly. Hermione decided that her stomach had taken an abrupt leave of her, and she turned to leave the kitchens before she was spotted. She opened the door as silently as she possibly could, and walked out into the hall. Before the doors closed all the way, she heard Ron yell, "SAVE ME DOBBY!! SAVE ME!!"
Hermione stopped midstep, looked back at the portrait, and raised her eyebrows. After a few seconds, she took a deep breath, and continued on her way. Sleep would not come easy this evening.
A/N:
AHHHHH! I can't believe I added a bit of slash. I don't do slash. It isn't me. But I had to. So much demand for some Ron action.
I noticed that the links I have put into the A/N's haven't been showing recently. I have no idea why not, as I've double-checked them in my documents and even edited the hyperlink in hopes that it would work. So far nothing.
MadAboutHarry: I just realized that I meant to answer your question in an earlier chapter, but for some reason didn't include it. I apologize. The gift that Snape gave Hermione was the Syllabus for the courses she would be taking in the first year of university study.
Zoe: Yup. The potion makes them aware of the thoughts of the person they concentrate on. If two drinkers are focused on each other, the tactile fun can start.
Takemeaway: It would be a funny short story. I'll have to give it some thought soon.
Plastic: I hope Dannie7 doesn't read the reviews. She might get a tad mad at you. Of course, if it's just the jealousy talking, she might forgive and share. . .*hee hee*
Piggylette: I must say. . .I have never gotten a review that long!!! I took one look at it and went 'WHOA!' I'm glad that you're enjoying this. I love people who appreciate my disgusting twisted side. I told some people about this story and they gave me 'the look'. But they know I'm pretty cracked, so just turn around and ignore me, not thinking that one day I may include them in the perverted insanity. They'll never know.
Revel_in_me: I'm not quite ready to leave the gutter. I've heard it's scary out there.
Jan McNeville: What?!? Would you want to wage war with me in word wonders? Why? I have a way with words!
Bethsand: Thank you for the compliments. I'll try to keep you posted on the GW/RL fic. But it won't be funny like this. The way it's looking, it seems somewhat disturbed.
ChishionoTenshi: She's becoming an influence on Hermione, especially when Snappy seems to be around.
Selene: Food for thought: Amateurs built the ark; Professionals built the Titanic. What am I saying? Just goes to show that, despite the fact we want to believe otherwise, Snape is human and not perfect. He may be a trained master, but that doesn't mean he'll never miss something.
Atalaya: I was going to, but I couldn't resist the penis song. With the refined English voice reciting it, it was too funny.
HotsummerAK47: Hints? Hon. Much like Hermione, I'm a tease!!
The most hated day for our dearly beloved Potions master and his absolutely adorable apprentice (ALLITERATION!!).
So, it only stands to reason that these two 'lovebirds' be spending such a holiday in the confines of Snape's office. Snape never left his dungeons, deciding that the only time he will make an appearance will be during the Quidditch match. After all, Slytherin was playing Gryffindor, and he'd spent days telling Hermione how Gryffindor was going to get slaughtered. An argument ensued, and it ended with one Severus Snape making a bet with one Hermione Granger.
*Flashback*
"Ummm. Hermione?" Severus asked, watching the student sitting on the floor in the corner of the room, book on the floor, and her head propped up on hands supported by her elbows. This wouldn't have been so unusual if she wasn't scratching the top of her head with the nail of her big toe.
"Hmmm?" She asked, looking up from the book she was reading. She'd asked him earlier if it was all right for her to bring down a small blanket so she could read while on the floor when they weren't experimenting. She said it helped her to concentrate more.
"What are you doing?" Severus asked, watching as the leg got back into a 'normal' position.
"Reading." She responded, looking back down at the book.
"I meant with your leg."
Hermione looked back up at him. "What are you talking about?" She asked, turning her head slightly to look at her legs, making sure they were still in once piece. Severus wasn't quite sure they were.
"I mean you've been sitting there scratching your head with your toes." He replied. "Last time I checked, limbs weren't supposed to move like that."
"Oh, usually they don't, unless you exercise them to." She said, going back to her book. "It's become a habit of mine when I'm studying. Usually wards off people from bugging me because it absolutely grosses them out."
"What types of exercises do you do, and why would you?" Severus asked, slightly curious as to what other positions she could do. 'Down boy!' He thought.
"It's called yoga. It's actually very calming. Helps me to deal with stress better. Why do you think I'm so calm around test time now?" She asked.
"I figured it was because of your extreme studying. I guess there are other things you need to be stressed out about. Example, Quidditch."
"Are you going to start with that crap again?" Hermione snapped, looking back up at him. She caught the amusement in his eye.
"You just call it crap because you know that Slytherin will win." Severus replied.
"No offence to dear Draco, Severus. But Harry could catch the snitch before Malfoy if he gave him a thirty-second head start. Not to mention the fact that your beaters can't aim for the other team properly. How many times did Shilly Sit hit his teammates during your last game?"
"Ah. But we've got a new beater." Severus reminded her.
"You know, now that I think of it, having that Jessica Jablowmee as beater sounds pretty sick." Hermione pointed out.
"You're getting off topic. The point is is that Slytherin will defeat Gryffindor, and no golden boy will stop us."
"You wanna bet?" Hermione asked.
"I don't make bets, Hermione. Wastes too much energy." Severus replied, looking back down at his tomes.
"Cause you're afraid that you're wrong."
Severus looked up. "You calling me afraid?" Hermione nodded, smirking slightly. "I repeat, Miss Granger." He continued in his most threatening tone, "Are you calling me afraid?"
His tone no longer worked on her. She smirked even more, nodding her head. "I calls'em as I sees'em, Professor Snape." She replied.
He thought for a moment. "Terms! Now!"
"If Gryffindor wins, you have to try and get a dance with Hagrid at the Valentine's Day ball tonight." She said. He paled slightly.
"I will do nothing of the sort." He said, and quickly added, "There's nothing wrong with it, but I refuse to entertain your homosexual fantasies. Pick something else."
Hermione absentmindedly brought her foot up again and began to scratch her head as she thought of something else. She didn't see Severus' eyes start following said foot, but he didn't see the amused expression on her face when she noticed the path his eyes took. She stopped scratching her head, and began to wave her foot around, wondering if he'd notice she was doing that on purpose. He didn't. She stopped waving her foot after a few minutes, bringing it further towards her eyes and watched as his eyes followed. When he realized she was watching him, he cleared his throat and looked away.
"Okay. If Gryffindor wins, you owe me a dance tonight." Hermione finally said. "Wearing crimson robes."
"I thought you hated Valentine's Day." Severus said. "And I will not wear a Gryffindor colour.
"I do. But most likely we'll both be dragged down there, much to our displeasure. And if anybody asks, you could at least say you lost a bet." She replied.
"Fair enough. If Slytherin wins, than you have to show me some more of this 'yoga'. If it's a great way to deal with stress, I might need it." He said.
"Deal." She said. He walked towards her. She held out her hand to shake his, but he grabbed her foot instead and shook it instead. She started to giggle.
"Are you ticklish, Hermione?" Severus asked.
"Are you suicidal, Severus?" Hermione asked, giving him a glare that said 'don't even think about it!'
He didn't think about it. He just started to tickle. Hermione was left screeching in laughter on the floor, begging him to stop. He did eventually, and left Hermione gasping for breath on the floor. "I'll get you for that!"
*End Flashback*
So it was just after lunch that he had donned his Slytherin scarf and made his way out to the Quidditch pitch. He'd supervised some of the team practices and decided, with Jessica as their new beater, that Gryffindor would have a very serious run for their money. Sitting in the box reserved for teachers, he made sure that he sat near Professor McGonagall; but not too close. He was confident that Slytherin would win, but he wouldn't want to take the chance of having Minerva brag endlessly about how well Gryffindor could be doing.
He waited for the game to begin.
~@~
Hermione sat in the Gryffindor section of the Quidditch pitch, wearing her usual Gryffindor winter attire. She'd spent some of the time away from researching watching the practices on the pitch since her bet with the potions master. From the looks of the strategies that they had come up with, Slytherin would be blown away. The only concern was what Jessica's talent was. She had become the new beater for the Slytherin team, and Hermione had never seen her performance on a broom.
She took a deep breath, and waited for the game to begin.
~@~
"AND NOW TAKING TO THE AIR; GRYFFINDOR!" The cheers rose as the seven Gryffindors came out onto the pitch. "HARRY POTTER, SEEKER AND TEAM CAPTAIN. RON WEASLEY AND SEAMUS FINNEGAN, BEATERS. TANSIA RAIDER, CORDIAL NUTTS, AND YVONNE CARD, CHASERS. AND NOYU MAYNAUGHT, KEEPER." The cheers rose even louder as the team performed formations over the Quidditch pitch. They kept their moves simple, so as to keep their focus on the game.
"AND NOW; SLYTHERIN!" The cheers that had died down once again rose. The games between these two houses were always spectacular. "DRACO MALFOY, SEEKER AND TEAM CAPTAIN. GREGORY GOYLE AND JESSICA JABLOWMEE, BEATERS. YESI AMAVICH, CARSON PLAYHOOF, AND VINCENT CRABBE, CHASERS. AND TOBY SMELLI, KEEPER." The Slytherins did a more elaborate formation over the pitch, surprisingly making more of a display than the Gryffindors did.
"PLAYERS! TAKE YOUR MARKS!" The players positioned themselves as Madame Hooch made her appearance at the centerline to start. Grabbing the Quaffle, she looked up to ensure the players were in their legal positions, and threw the ball into play. It was Yesi who first grabbed the quaffle, darting past Yvonne, as she made her way towards the Gryffindor goal posts. She didn't get far though. She swerved to avoid getting hit by a bludger, and lost her grip on the quaffle. Tansia caught it and made his way back over to the Slytherin side, darting past Goyle, but not quick enough to avoid having the quaffle smacked out of his own grasp. It was luckily caught by Harry and thrown towards Cordial. It was intercepted by Toby, who dropped it into the hands of Carson. Carson flew back over to the Gryffindor goal posts, and made a desperate toss to one of the rings before a bludger nearly knocked him off his broom. The toss was intercepted by Noyu, and tossed back to Yvonne, who darted quickly past Crabbe. Making her way back over to the Slytherin side, she was intercepted by Jessica. Jessica threw the ball up to Toby, who immediately tossed it back to Yesi to get it away from their own rings. Yesi made his way over to the Gryffindor side, tossing the quaffle back and forth between himself and Carson. At the last toss, Yvonne was in position to intercept it from Carson, when it was thrown to Crabbe, who seemed to come from nowhere, instead. He made to toss the ball to the ring closest, but than tossed it to the ring furthest once Noyu got too close, scoring the first goal of the game.
Hermione nearly groaned but reminded herself that the game was still early, and neither Harry nor Draco had spotted the snitch as of yet. She could tell that Severus had a smirk on his face right now.
~@~
The game lasted over three hours.
Slytherin won!
Hermione gave her congratulations to Draco and Jessica before leaving to see how Ron and Harry were doing. She made her way back to the Gryffindor common room. Her housemates were patting the players on the back, despite the fact they lost. It was an amazing game, and both teams had fought hard. In the end, both teams were tied, and a bludger had thrown Harry off course in a head on race with Draco for the snitch. While Harry was momentarily distracted, Draco caught it.
It seemed that everyone was still heavy into the post game activities, and she made her way down to the dungeons to face the music, promising Ginny (who nagged her for days on end) that she would return with plenty of time to get ready for the Valentine's Day ball.
She approached the dungeon, imagining the size of Severus' smirk when she arrived. They would set up a time when she would show him the moves. Approaching the door, she mentally berated herself for the millionth time since the end of the game for making the bet. Didn't she learn anything from betting with Draco and Harry? It caused enough problems. She raised her hand and knocked on the door.
"Enter."
Opening the door, Severus didn't need to turn to know who was there. "Miss Granger, please close the door." She did so, walking over to the seat she usually occupied. He turned and looked at her. "I must admit." He started. "I very well nearly fell out of the box today." She started to giggle at the thought.
"That was a close one." She replied.
"Very. And now that I have been proven right."
"Ah yes. The terms." Hermione rolled her eyes, waiting for her fate.
"Since we do research on Mondays and Thursdays, I think Wednesdays would be good for these yoga lessons." Severus said. "Any objections?"
"No, sir. I look forward to seeing what you can do." Hermione said, blushing slightly when she realized just how badly that could have sounded.
Severus seemed to not take notice. "Very well than." He said. "I have no doubt that you will be at the ball this evening. The Headmaster has made it clear that the faculty attendance is required, no matter how much I have nagged him. Unless you were able to dissuade your friends from pushing you to go."
"No such luck, I'm afraid." She replied. "At least you won't be the only one suffering."
"Indeed."
~@~
"Oh Hermione! You look GORGEOUS!!" Ginny squealed as Hermione came out of the bathroom, full makeup and dress. Ginny had done her hair for her. Most of her hair flowing down with a loose bun gracing the top of the back of her head, very light makeup, and deep purple robes, flowing gracefully to the floor. Over all, simple; but it all fit rather nicely.
"I hate going through all this crap. I could be spending the night reading and studying for NEWTs." Hermione complained.
"Oh shush. You should do this more often." Ginny replied, putting the finishing touches on her own hair.
"I'm only thankful that I can at least get away without any underwear." Hermione said absentmindedly. She looked up to a wide-eyed Ginny. "What? It can be very restricting sometimes."
"I'm so glad I'm not alone there." Ginny finally said.
~@~
Hermione, Ginny, Harry, and Ron all entered the Great Hall for the Valentine's Day ball. They would meet up with Draco and Jessica soon. They noticed Neville and Dannie were a bit preoccupied as they approached the Hall. They decided to not disturb them. The teachers would get them to cool off later.
When they entered the Hall, they noticed that all the house tables had been moved from the room, and only a few smaller tables had been lined along the walls. The ceiling showed off the gorgeous snowfall outside; large flakes floating down about halfway in the room and the occasional star could be seen through the clouds.
The guys left the gals at a table to chat while they went off to cause a ruckus. Before they left, they gave the girls a few words of advice; stay away from the punch bowl, and don't eat the candy. After promising that it was all in good fun and no one would end up in the hospital wing seriously harmed, the girls promised that they would not divulge their plans.
Lavender, Pavarti, and Pansy soon joined the group, getting Ginny in a heated argument about the dangers of using magic on your hair. Hermione and Jessica looked from each other, back to the group, and than at each other again before nodding and deciding to leave them to their debate.
"Where are you guys off to?" Pansy asked.
"The astronomy tower." Jessica replied.
"Why would you want to go there?" Ginny asked.
"Cause we want to make out." Hermione said, the two girls walking away from the group. Although Jessica enjoyed Valentine's Day, she couldn't stomach all the 'beauty banter' those girls usually had. They got to the other side of the Great Hall where they met up with Dannie.
"Where's Neville?" Jessica asked. "You two are usually never parted unless force by unforgivable is used."
"He's just grabbing some punch for us." Dannie replied.
"Uh oh!" Jessica said.
"What?"
"Don't drink the punch, whatever you do." Hermione said. Dannie looked up to where Neville had gone and could see him returning with two small cups. She didn't know what happened to the punch, but would take no chances. Especially since both a Gryffindor and a Slytherin had warned her. As Neville neared them, she was about to tell him not to drink the punch, but it was too late. Just as she opened her mouth, Neville brought one of the cups up to his mouth and took a big gulp.
"Ummm. Neville, hon?" Dannie said.
"Yes?" Neville asked.
"Come with me." She said, grabbing his hand, and pulling him out of the Great Hall. Jessica and Hermione could see the big grin on his face as he allowed himself to be led out.
"What do you suppose will happen?" Jessica asked.
Both girls were startled by a high-pitched scream. Looking in the direction it came from, they could make out that Noyu Maynaught was looking around the group wide-eyed, and was beet red in the face. She than looked down at her self, hugged herself, and ran from the Great Hall, screaming that she could never show her face around the school again.
Hermione was absolutely confused, and looked over at Jessica, who had a look of dawning realization.
"Oh Merlin. He didn't!" She exclaimed quietly.
"Who didn't? And what didn't they do?" Hermione asked.
"Draco. You remember when Craven Moorehed came on New Years?" She asked. Hermione shook her head. "Oh yeah! You were sick that night, weren't you?" Jessica continued, trying to mask the guilt. "Craven Moorehed was one of my father's college buddies who used to play pranks on everyone. He thought that the party at New Year's was rather tame, and told Draco about some of the gags he used to pull at Oxford. I've heard all the stories, and Draco told me that he would love to do some of them. I told him he didn't have the guts."
Hermione looked at him. "Jessica. No offense. But that was pretty stupid on your part."
Jessica feigned hurt for a moment, than smiled. "Yeah. But than again, I don't know Draco as well as you do. Well, I don't know his personality as much as you do." She said with a mischievous look on her face.
"What did he do anyway?" Hermione asked.
"Have you learned about the sense sensitivity potions?" She asked, not missing the slight blush Hermione got on her cheeks as she nodded. "It's a variation on the sight sensitivity potion, whereas the person who ingests it can actually see through certain materials."
Hermione needed to more explanation. Hermione was about to ask how long it should last for when Draco came up to the pair. "Did you see Noyu? I wonder what happened to her."
"Don't play ignorant, Draco." Hermione said.
Draco turned to Jessica. "You told her, didn't you."
Jessica looked up at him. "Of course I did. If some of the guys here figured out that they weren't actually naked, well, those with more decency anyway, I should at least warn her to cover up."
"First, I don't think you'll find many guys who have decency here when it comes to looking at naked chicks. Second, I don't think they'd stay around. There are an equal amount of guys here." Draco said. "Anyway, have you guys seen Ron?"
"Nope. Why?"
"No reason." Draco said. He held out his hand to Jessica as the music started up. "Care for a dance, mi'lady?"
"Why good sir!" Jessica said. "Of course." Draco smiled, and waited for Jessica to place her hand in his. He was slightly taken aback when Jessica grabbed Hermione around the waist, and the two girls made their way to the dance floor. He watched the two of them for a moment as they started dancing, before smiling again and shaking his head. He tapped Hermione on the shoulder. "May I cut in?"
"No thanks. I'm quite comfortable." Hermione said.
"Jessica?" Draco tried again. He missed the glance Jessica made over his shoulder at the Great Hall entrance.
"And miss the groping action? Hermione. You have great hands." Jessica said. Both looked completely serious.
"It's all the potions work I do. Keeps the fingers strong while allowing them to remain graceful and delicate." She said with a straight face. Hermione lifted her head off of Jessica's shoulder. The two girls looked at each other for a few moments before slowly inching closer. Draco's eyes were widening each centimeter they moved. Just as their lips were about to touch, they looked over at Draco, and nearly collapsed in laughter.
Draco was literally wide-eyed and drooling. He snapped out of his trance. "Damn. Can I join?" They started to laugh again. Draco held out his hand to Jessica once again. "Seriously." He said.
"Certainly." Jessica replied, taking his hand.
"Jessica!" Hermione said in mock rage. "Did it all mean nothing to you?"
"I'm sorry Hermione. You're a nice gal and all, but I prefer to cross dressing type." Draco looked at her in surprise. "What? You spend more time in the bathroom than half the girls in my dorm."
"You are so mean."
"Yup."
"That's cool." He whispered before letting go of her waist, and spinning her around once before latching on again. "Don't mind in the bit."
Hermione shook her head, and turned to make her way back to the table where Ginny and Pansy were talking. As soon as she turned though, there stood the potions master, wearing his usual black, scowl firmly in place.
"Miss Granger."
"Professor?"
Scowl softening slightly, he held out his hand. "May I have this dance?"
Hermione nodded and lifted her hand up into his, her other hand went to his shoulder. His arm snaked around her waist as the song continued. "Finally got dragged down here, hmmm?" She asked.
"Of course. I didn't expect to hide from the Headmaster for long. I did not, however, miss your interesting exchange with Miss Jablowmee." He said, voice lowering.
"Jessica has had an interesting influence on me. You should've seen the look on Draco's face." She replied.
"I expect it was the same look any male within five feet of you two had." Severus replied.
Hermione looked up at him. She could see the amusement in his eyes. "I know. I've been told I can be pretty bad. You probably had the same expression." She said. "By the way, how come you're dancing with me? I lost the bet, remember?"
Severus leaned down slowly. "This just happens to be an added bonus to my winnings, Miss Granger." He growled softly into her ear. He allowed some air to blow gently across the lobe before he straightened up. The song ended, and Hermione, who became a bit flustered after that, had regained her composure.
"Thank you for the dance, Miss Granger." He said, bowing slightly before walking to the head table.
~@~
It was after the ball that found Hermione making her way to the kitchen. She didn't eat much that day, except for the crow after the Quidditch match. Deciding to grab a piece of fruit before returning to her dorm, she approached the portrait of the fruit bowl. Tickling the pear, she walked through the opened entrance, and stopped once she got a look at the kitchens.
They were empty. Not a house elf to be seen. This was strange. Suddenly, a loud clatter which sounded like a bunch of pots and pans being thrown about made her jump, but she remained silent. Whoever was there, it didn't sound like she should make her presence known until she knew there was no danger. She could hear a voice.
It sounded like Dobby! He was muttering something, but it was quiet, not sounding at all like there was any danger. But you never could tell for sure. She snuck to the corner that led to the main kitchen area, and cautiously poked her head around. The scene that awaited her was too shocking to realize.
There was Ron, leaning on the counter with his elbows, and Dobby was floating behind him. And their movements looked. . .AHHHHH!
Her shock began to dissipate somewhat, and some of the muddled words coming from Dobby started to become clearer. "Dobby helps friend of Harry Potter." He was saying. Ron, whose eyes were closed, was sweating slightly. Hermione decided that her stomach had taken an abrupt leave of her, and she turned to leave the kitchens before she was spotted. She opened the door as silently as she possibly could, and walked out into the hall. Before the doors closed all the way, she heard Ron yell, "SAVE ME DOBBY!! SAVE ME!!"
Hermione stopped midstep, looked back at the portrait, and raised her eyebrows. After a few seconds, she took a deep breath, and continued on her way. Sleep would not come easy this evening.
A/N:
AHHHHH! I can't believe I added a bit of slash. I don't do slash. It isn't me. But I had to. So much demand for some Ron action.
I noticed that the links I have put into the A/N's haven't been showing recently. I have no idea why not, as I've double-checked them in my documents and even edited the hyperlink in hopes that it would work. So far nothing.
MadAboutHarry: I just realized that I meant to answer your question in an earlier chapter, but for some reason didn't include it. I apologize. The gift that Snape gave Hermione was the Syllabus for the courses she would be taking in the first year of university study.
Zoe: Yup. The potion makes them aware of the thoughts of the person they concentrate on. If two drinkers are focused on each other, the tactile fun can start.
Takemeaway: It would be a funny short story. I'll have to give it some thought soon.
Plastic: I hope Dannie7 doesn't read the reviews. She might get a tad mad at you. Of course, if it's just the jealousy talking, she might forgive and share. . .*hee hee*
Piggylette: I must say. . .I have never gotten a review that long!!! I took one look at it and went 'WHOA!' I'm glad that you're enjoying this. I love people who appreciate my disgusting twisted side. I told some people about this story and they gave me 'the look'. But they know I'm pretty cracked, so just turn around and ignore me, not thinking that one day I may include them in the perverted insanity. They'll never know.
Revel_in_me: I'm not quite ready to leave the gutter. I've heard it's scary out there.
Jan McNeville: What?!? Would you want to wage war with me in word wonders? Why? I have a way with words!
Bethsand: Thank you for the compliments. I'll try to keep you posted on the GW/RL fic. But it won't be funny like this. The way it's looking, it seems somewhat disturbed.
ChishionoTenshi: She's becoming an influence on Hermione, especially when Snappy seems to be around.
Selene: Food for thought: Amateurs built the ark; Professionals built the Titanic. What am I saying? Just goes to show that, despite the fact we want to believe otherwise, Snape is human and not perfect. He may be a trained master, but that doesn't mean he'll never miss something.
Atalaya: I was going to, but I couldn't resist the penis song. With the refined English voice reciting it, it was too funny.
HotsummerAK47: Hints? Hon. Much like Hermione, I'm a tease!!
