DISCLAIMER: I don't own Harry Potter or any of the other characters mentioned and I'm not making any money out of this. Only the plot is mine.

WARNING: This fan fic contains slash themes, which is male/male relationships. If homosexual themes bother you, don't read this.

Rated: R, definitely R this time. It's mild, but the slash is there ladies and gentlemen. You've been warned.

Chapter 12

With the loving mercy of our God,

A new day from heaven will dawn upon us.

It will shine on those who live in darkness,

In the shadow of death.

It will guide us into the path of peace.

Luke 1 vs. 78-79

**********

To any onlookers, it would have looked like a simple stand-off between enemies. Draco Malfoy, flanked by the ever-present Crabbe and Goyle, and Harry Potter, with Ron and Hermione at his side. They stood facing each other at the entrance to the Great Hall, and the animosity between them was obvious. Harry stood, transfixed by the boy who had broken his heart. Draco merely looked bored, but the rings under his eyes belied his calm exterior. His eyes were looking everywhere but at Harry, as though he couldn't bear to look at him.

"Get out of the way Malfoy." Ron spat, breaking the silence with his derogatory tone. Crabbe and Goyle flexed their muscles as Ron pushed rudely past, Harry and Hermione following closely. As Harry walked past him though, Draco grabbed his arm and moved his lips close to his ear. To anyone else, this was a move to threaten and intimidate.

"I missed you." he whispered earnestly so that only Harry could hear, their eyes met, parted, and then Draco let him go so he could enter the hall.

**********

You don't know that I've been waiting for you for days; simply willing you to appear. I think you watch me when I don't know you're there. Do you think I'm beautiful?

In my dreams you come to see me. There are no words as I see you. I know how far you've come, and that it was only to see me. I want you to stay with me all night. I need to feel your closeness. I need you near me to chase away my night-time horrors. I want to feel the softness of you. I want to feel your lips against mine. Needing. Wanting. Having.

I've been thinking about you.

**********

Harry took his place beside Ron at the Gryffindor table and watched Draco as he walked calmly to his place and began a conversation with Pansy as though nothing had just happened.

Harry had found the holiday almost unbearable. He'd been constantly taunted by thoughts of Draco; images of what he couldn't have. Ron and Hermione hadn't pressed him, but he thought that they were a bit too wrapped up in each other to notice him much. He smiled as he thought of his two best friends and how happy they made each other. His joy was only brief though, as the jealousy of their relationship that he had been trying to repress surfaced. They had been together for such a sort time, and already they were far closer than they used to be. His whole being yearned for the touch of the one person who had ever made him feel whole, but he shouldn't be feeling this way. He should move on. As his eyes drifted to the Slytherin table again, he almost laughed out loud at the idea of trying to forget the feelings he had for his blond beauty.

Draco picked that moment to look over at Harry, and his face grew serious. Harry thought he saw something like regret flicker in his eyes, before he turned away again.

Harry took this opportunity to examine Draco; looking for any change in the boy. His appearance was flawless as ever, pale blond hair falling softly around his face, accentuating his harsh features. Harry, however, also noticed the tired eyes that his smiles didn't seem to reach, and the paler than usual skin. Instinctively, as though Draco was just an extension of his own body, he knew that something had changed. There was something different about Draco's demeanour; he looked almost defeated. Harry turned away when he realised that he was staring.

One bright point in Harry's holiday had been being able to see Sirius again. They had talked for a long time; able to wonder the grounds of Hogwarts as there was nobody around to see them. Many of their conversations had lingered on Lupin, and the future. Harry was still adamant about wanting to be included, but he hadn't pressed Sirius as he had before. He had so little time with his godfather, and he didn't want to argue again so he had kept many of his thoughts to himself. Sirius had noticed Harry's quietness and had asked him about it. He'd been tempted to tell Sirius about what had happened with Draco; about how frustrated he was; about how he had fallen in love. Then reality hit home and he'd pushed such thoughts to the back of his mind.

Harry was pulled back from his reverie as those around him stopped talking and turned to face the teachers' table. Dumbledore had risen and was about to speak.

**********

Draco stalked into the Great Hall after Harry and his friends, clenching his hands into fists to hide the fact that they were shaking. He hadn't thought that seeing Harry after so long would be so intense.

He'd arrived back at Hogwarts very early that morning and found that all lessons had been cancelled for the day so that people had time to prepare for the ball that evening. Being back was strange. It felt as though he'd been away for years, and that he'd returned into a time warp. Everything was exactly the same, but he felt that he'd changed so much.

He'd immediately gone to see Dumbledore and Snape upon returning and had had a very awkward conversation with them. Dumbledore had wanted to know everything that had happened whilst he'd been at home. He'd been especially intrigued by all of Lucius' meetings with the Bergers, unfortunately Draco didn't have any of the details that he'd wanted to know.

Draco had also told Dumbledore and Snape about what had happened on his last night at the manor. In a dull voice that gave away no trace of what he was really feeling underneath, he had told them about the temple and Voldemort and the girl. He didn't say how he'd felt, or how he could still hear her screams. He didn't tell them about the pride in Lucius' eyes or the way that Voldemort's voice made his skin crawl. He'd seen the pity in Dumbledore's eyes, and even worse, he'd seen the understanding and recognition in Snape's. He knew just how cruel they could be.

Draco hadn't slept and he couldn't eat. The only thing keeping him going was, at this moment, simply being in the same room as Harry. When he was near him, he could imagine that one day everything would be right again; that one day he wouldn't have to suffer this torment over and over again in his mind. He glanced over to the Gryffindor table and saw that Harry was watching him, the image of the dead girl flashed before his eyes, and he looked away. A dull ache started in his chest, feeling like the beginning of panic, as he remembered his father's parting words to him. Lucius had pulled him away from a fussing Narcissa, and had whispered to him:

"There's something I need you to do. It's very important. You need to fill this vial with Potter's blood. It's enchanted, so all you have to do is place it against his skin and the blood will be drawn. He won't feel a thing. This is very important Draco, and you need to do it soon."

Draco had merely nodded and taken the small, glass vial from his father. He hadn't been able to look Lucius in the eye after the previous evening; he was too afraid of what he would see there.

He'd told Dumbledore about this development obviously, but they hadn't decided what to do. Draco didn't want to risk any harm to Harry, but he couldn't see a way of not having to do it. Lucius had stressed how important this was.

His mind drifted again as his gaze settled once more on Harry. All thought stopped when he saw Harry give Ron a smile, brushing his hair out of his eyes. Draco wished it was his hand in Harry's hair, gently stroking. 'I can't do this to myself anymore.'

He was going to talk to Harry; apologise, beg, whatever it took. He knew he wouldn't last without him much longer, and he wasn't sure he wanted to try. He just didn't know what he could say to Harry that would undo everything he'd already said.

He was still pondering on this when Pansy, who had been prattling in his ear for the whole meal and staring surreptitiously at his right fore-arm, poked him in the side, drawing his attention to the fact that Dumbledore had risen and was preparing to speak.

**********

Dumbledore rose and surveyed his students. He glanced briefly in Draco Malfoy's direction and sighed. That boy had been through hell that holiday, and he wished there was more he could do to protect him. As he was staring, he noticed Draco's gaze shift to land on Harry Potter's face, and he was stunned at the intensity of the gaze. Dumbledore wasn't so old that he didn't remember what desire and love looked like. Draco's words from their first meeting came back to him once more.

"I never want Potter to find out about this."

His face remained remarkably passive as the final piece of the puzzle clicked into place. 'Oh. That wasn't what I expected. Well this is interesting, and it does explain a lot. This is going to cause a lot of trouble.'

He realised that the students were ready to listen to him and he launched into his welcoming back speech; reminding them all of the time of the ball that evening, and they were to spend the rest of the afternoon getting ready.

He sat down as the students filed out, his thoughts still centred on the problem of Harry and Draco.

**********

That afternoon, Harry escaped Gryffindor Tower and all of the excited students getting ready for the ball. He walked to the far bank of the river and stood looking across to the school, lost in thought.

It was here that Draco found him. Apart from Draco's words to him at lunch, the two hadn't spoken since before the holidays. Harry wasn't sure he had anything left to say.

"Harry?" Draco said softly, coming to stand beside him and looking out at the castle too. Harry turned to face him tiredly, wondering what he was possibly going to say. His heart stopped at the look of earnest on Draco's face as he turned to look at him too.

"Harry I…I had this whole speech prepared, but now I'm looking at you, it doesn't seem that important anymore. I was going to apologise, beg for forgiveness. I…" Harry continued to stare, waiting patiently for Draco to get to the point.

"The thing is I, I wanted to explain, to be clear, but you have to understand there are things I can't tell you and-"

"Draco." Harry interrupted Draco's babbling with this softly spoken word. Draco stopped talking and stared back at Harry. Harry looked tired, and Draco didn't blame him. "I don't want to know your secrets. You don't have to tell me everything straight away. I trust you. All I want is you Draco, you know that."

Tears began to flow from Draco's eyes and he wiped them away furiously. 'He trusts me. He trusts me.'

"I know. I got lost before and forgot what was important. But I know now, I realised a lot of things whilst I was away. Harry, I can't do this alone anymore. I don't want to. I didn't think I had a choice, but I was so wrong. Can you forgive me?" He took Harry's hands in his but was unable to look the other boy in the eye. 'What if he says no? How would I manage without him?'

Harry's heart melted at the forlorn look on Draco's face. He tilted Draco's chin so that they were staring deep into each other's eyes, and smiled.

"Of course I can you stupid arse." he said quietly.

Draco stared at Harry, unbelieving, then he laughed and pulled Harry into a fierce embrace. His heart felt so full he thought it would burst. He held on tightly, afraid that Harry might change his mind at any moment, until Harry pulled back slightly. They said nothing for a while; just drowned in the love they found in each other's eyes.

"I love you, you know." said Draco finally.

"Draco, I don't think I could love anyone more than I love you."

There was no more space for speech as lips descended saying more than simple words ever could. Their hands and mouths mapped out desperate pictures of love, desire and fulfilment on each others' bodies. All of the frustration and pent up lust boiled over in that moment because they were finally allowed to do this. This felt right and good and there was nothing left to stop them. No more insecurity or fear or mistrust. The world faded away and, for a moment, there were no evil men plotting their downfall and there was no need for spying. Nothing mattered anymore because they were here in this moment together.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't know." Draco kept repeating these words over and over between their kisses.

**********

"I need you so much Draco." Harry gasped, breaking away and pressing their foreheads together. "I've felt this way for so long, and now I have you, I want all of you. It feels as though I've been smashed into pieces and you're the only one who can put me back together." He was almost incoherent with the intensity of emotion running through him, but Draco understood.

"We make each other complete." Draco whispered, and recaptured Harry's mouth. The passion between them increased; they were both panting and desperately straining to get closer to each other.

"Here? Now?" asked Harry nervously.

"Oh yes." said Draco. "It has to be now."

"I know." They smiled at each other, both struck by the enormity of what they were going to do. They came together again, and this time, there was only desperate, agonising need. They didn't care that they were outside, they didn't care that anyone might see; all they knew was each other. The world ceased to exist for them.

Never breaking their gaze, Draco slowly unbuttoned Harry's shirt, slipping it off and running his hands over Harry's tanned chest. Harry groaned at his touch and felt his knees buckle. He leant into Draco's touch, grabbing him by the waist and pulling him closer. Draco's hands slipped to Harry's back as they kissed once more, fluttering at the base of his spine then travelling up to discover his broad shoulders. This first exploration was the most important of all, and he would remember every inch.

The exquisite feeling of Draco's hands on his skin was almost too much for Harry to take, and he felt the sudden urge for movement. Tremulously, he pushed back from Draco's embrace and they locked eyes again. He reached out and, when finding that his hands were shaking too much, simply tore open Draco's shirt, hearing the buttons ping away, and spread his hands over the milky white skin he found there. Draco gasped and arched into Harry's delicate touch. He wriggled out of the remains of his shirt and pulled Harry close to him. The first touch of skin on skin sending delicious sparks of pleasure through their bodies that made them gasp.

'I want to stroke you, to revel in the feel of your skin beneath my hands. I want to feel you all around me so that I know I'm safe. I'll always be safe here with you. In this moment I know that everything is forgiven, there's a new path ahead of us and we will take it together.'

Removing Harry's glasses and tossing them carelessly aside with a flick of his wrist, Draco gently pushed Harry to the soft ground of the river bank and lay beside him. He ran his hand tenderly through Harry's hair, marvelling at the softness of it. They looked into each others eyes, and peace finally surrounded them; overwhelming. Unable to hold back any longer, Draco leant in for a chaste and innocent kiss that broke Harry's heart with its tenderness. Their kiss deepened and neither could hold back the desire that broke through in great waves that overtook them and left them drowning.

'I want you. I want you here with me now. I want you inside me, pushing me further than you ever have before. I want to be so close to you that I don't know where I end and you begin. I need this more than I've ever needed anything.'

The gentleness that was present before faded as they both gave in to the crushing desire they felt. Discarding the rest of their clothes, they clutched one another close, their hips moving together creating a delicious friction that left them both trembling. The heat between them was rising.

"Draco, I need you now." Harry murmured gently, tracing the outline of Draco's ear with his tongue.

'I don't think I could want you more.'

"Are you sure?"

'This is all I'll ever need.'

"Yes. Please. Now."

'Now.'

Draco moved above Harry, shifting his hips between his legs. He looked deeply into the forest-green pools that would save him from his torment, and leant down to kiss him, covering the gasp that escaped Harry's lips as he entered him, slowly and gently.

"Am I hurting you?"

"No. Don't stop."

'Don't stop. Never stop. This is too much, but not enough. It'll never be enough. Don't stop. I need this more than anything I've ever needed before. I need you. I need you.'

Under a warm summer sun, and in the presence of all nature; a perfect expression of love.

Gentle movements, belying the anxious urge underneath. Soft caresses and a tenderness to melt every heart. A fire, burning brighter than anything seen before; eternally fuelled by this moment. It's burning them from the inside. Pain and pleasure mixed as one. Amidst the hate and the passion and the hurt and the fury, a love is born that will span lifetimes and send ripples through the world.

Breaking down walls of hate and inhibition, they moved together in an ancient rhythm set long ago by the greatest lovers of the world; travelling together on their journey towards an earth-shattering ecstasy. For them, this moment would last forever.

**********

Starved of affection, I stagger through life.

Driven on by my dreams, of something more,

Something better than this.

Hanging on by a thread,

My poor body racked by loneliness.

A hand, so elegant and beautiful,

Blocks out the cruel sun that burns my skin

And pulls me to safety.

I cannot lift my eyes from the dusty ground,

For the habit of disappointment still lives in me.

But he tilts my chin and his love erases the world.

I leave my bitter pain and sorrow,

And exchange them for a journey

Which we make together.

He takes my hand,

And we dance together through life.

For one terrifying moment, his grip on me lessens,

And once again I fear all I left behind.

But he encircles me with his arms

And never lets me go.

Safe, warm and no longer alone, I carry on

My journey which never ends.

A/N: Hmmm, not as happy with this, I think it could be better. A lot better actually. Sodding work put me off! I'd appreciate comments on the last bit. But aren't I nice for getting them together?? You've all been begging so much, happy now? Ooo I've already written the ending, it was all in my head and I didn't want to forget any of it. If all goes according to plan, there'll be 3 more chapters, long ones mind, and an epilogue. Oh the excitement!!!

Lady Fire eyes: hope you didn't hurt yourself falling off your chair! Happy now? You asked for them to get together and they are! Thanks for the review

Boston: Thanks a lot. You really should read more slash but be careful, it's addictive!!

SoulSister: Was this chapter a bit happier?? I don't want to depress you!

Xirleb70: glad you like the story! I think I'll save up for highlights too. It'll probably take me months though!

All reviews are welcome!!!!!!