Disclaimer: I do not own any of the X-men or songs in this fanfiction (except Mel, Ash, Kat and Ev) so please don't sue!!
Oh and please review, I know this isn't as good as number 1 in the series but number 3 is much better and will be posted depending on how many reviews I get. So if you love it or hate it let me know!! Nuff said!
Retribution X and the curious caper of the sushi bar and the disappearance of Scots pants!
# = psychic communication
#Logan, Ashley I believe there's something's in my room that belongs to you, please come here and collect them#
I groaned bloody professor is crack of friggin' dawn, sparrow's bloody fart; I looked at my watch, its 11:30 in the morning. I jumped out of bed and grabbed my dressing gown and plodded dizzily to the door.
The Professor lent up in bed, he knew something had spooked the girls last night however he hadn't faced probing the minds of 4 hormonal teenage girls but not any old teenage girls, Retribution-X teenage girls. He felt that the time had come to get some answers and felt it his duty to probe the mind of the most innocent of the 4 and also the easiest target Kat, who he could hear still snoring softly.
'The first thing I'll check is her dreams they may give me an indication of what it was with out me having to plunge into the murky depths of her mind.
#I want puppy #
'Okay so maybe the girls dream was a bit confused, I'll try again' the professor thought
#I WANT A PUPPY! … But Kittens are really fuzzy#
At that moment he was interrupted by the crash of his door as it was flung open.
As I left my room after hastily tying up my hair (no one in the mansion had ever seen it down) I couldn't help but notice the room was very quiet and very tidy (well as tidy as a room can be with 3 inhabitants who's idea of cleaning a room was to sweep it with a glance).
As I approached the Professor's door I met Logan who gave me a hostile glare and flung open the door.
'Nice to know the guy doesn't harbour grudges' I thought.
As I walked in I couldn't help but notice that the Professors dressing table was different. On closer inspection it seemed that there was sum kind of fort made of old sheets under it complete with flag (at least that's what I think the old pair of greying Y-fronts with professor X's name sown on attached to what appeared to be Remy's 'pole' was supposed to be). I also noticed that the wheelchair was still humming and trying to crawl forward from last night but I ignored it as the Prof didn't seem to notice.
"I like what you've done with the place Chuck" Logan commented sardonically.
"If you please" indicated for me to draw back the door of the fort.
Suddenly a high pitched voice that could only belong to one person screamed shrilly "ARRGGHHH…HE'S COME TO FINISH THE JOB" Kat.
All of a sudden the once serene and calm room broke into activity.
Me laughing "No wonder the room was so quiet this morning, you lucky gits I was freezing my nut's off in our room" then staring pointedly at Wolverine.
Wolverine in turn was staring pointedly at the group of girl squashed under the dressing table and yelling "So you little shits think your funny huh? Well let's see how funny this is!" Snickt "Yeah I'd scream too but your gonna be screamin' a whole lot more when I've finished with ya"
The girls were screaming and clinging to each other and professor looked well like he always does.
I thought for a moment as Logan yelled something about not hiding forever before yelling at them myself "YOU TRAITORS I SCARIFICED MY LIFE TWICE FOR YOU LAST NIGHT AND ALL YOU DID WAS RUN AWAY AND LEAVE ME WITH EL…TO PICK UP THE PIECES!!"
The girls got up and ran away
"HEY!! WHERE THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOUR GOING GET BACK HERE AND IT'LL BE OVER QUIKER!!" Me and Wolverine yelled at their retreating bodies with the respective sounds of ZZZZzzzz and Snickt.
Back in the Girls Bedroom
"We've got to meet Elvis down in the danger room in 10 so shift your sorry little butts" I snarled at the traitors as I burst into the room.
Jubilee had the audacity to smirk while the others at least had the decency to look embarrassed. However I do feel that its fair to say that no one escaped the retribution of a hangover from last nights activities, mine it seems was not so violent due to the whole sick incident, ohhh that reminded me that I should avoid Storm today.
"But it's our day off!!" Jubilee protested
"Correction it was going to be our day off until you decided to piss off Logan" I shot back
"Hey I wasn't the one who yelled 'Antagonise him he can't get us!'" Jubilee pointed out, but I chose to rise above it and be the mature one by ignoring her.
Mansion Hallway
"What's this is in my potted plant?" Ororo said holding her nose
I blushed "You see the thing is Storm I saw the Professor be sick in it, but the Professor seemed really touchy when I mentioned that he might be ill." I smiled as a brainwave hit me at full force "And you see the thing is I saw him do something a lot worse by Scott's shoes but the Prof. seemed so upset about it I decided not to mention it. You know I didn't want to embarrass him" I added with my best good girl face on.
"Yes if it upset him that much I will not mention it either" Storm said mildly "But if I ever catch hi doing it, the Professor will feel the full force of the weather goddess!"
An hour later in the Danger room
"Ya think that was bad wait till I see what you've got to do next"
"If I didn't know better I would have thought you were enjoying this" I accused him feeling sick again.
"Well now Sparky you've just earned yourself an extra 5 laps in your run!"
"But…"
"10"
"You..."
"15"
I was starting to see a pattern and decided to give up.
"You know what I'm not taking this any more" Jube's screamed "I'm tired and I'm sick and I'm going to go see Prof X…"
"And tell him what exactly" Wolverine smirked
"That…I'll tell him that…that your being mean" She said as she stomped out with the rest of us hot on her heels.
Prof. X's Study
"What exactly do you expect me to do" He said using visible effort to remain calm
"Tell him to stop being mean" Kat squeaked close to tears.
"Or better still get us a new personal tutor" Jubilee put in.
"I'm afraid I can't do that" The Prof. said evenly
"Then we ain't leavin' buddy" I spoke up
"We aren't?" Evelyn whispered in my ear
"Just agree"
10 Minutes later.
"Im henry the 8th I am, henry the 8th I am, I am
I got married to the widow next door,
Shes been married 7 times before
And…."
#Hank your assistance is needed immediately in my study#
"You might want to try isolating your psy message to just Hank instead of projecting it to all of us" Mel helpfully pointed out.
"You called Prof X" Came the dictionary…sorry Beasts voice from the door.
"Yes, thank you Hank I would like you to escort these young ladies from my study immediately"
"Why they don't seem to be causing any trouble" Hank replied as we looked at him with round innocent eyes.
"They are staging a sit in, in my study!!" came the Professors reply.
So he was starting to crack!!
"Yes but Professor aren't you always informing them of the superiority of controlled opposition as opposed to violence"
"What he said" Kat said not having understood anything past the word 'but'.
"I give them my full support" Hank smiled a toothy grin "Is there anything you need girls"
"A guitar" Ev piped up.
"Consider it done my young friend"
The professor rested his head in his hands and sighed mumbling something about 'going to be a long day'.
5 Minutes later
"Wolverines a Jerk
And he makes us over work
When all we wanna do is shirk"
Jubilee sang as she strummed random notes on the guitar giving the effect of a monkey with a guitar (no one could play it except Evelyn) she then passed the guitar to Kat who strummed the guitar in the same manner as a fingerless monkey.
"Professor X is mean…
An…And his heads got a sheen
And his underwear aint clean"
She smiled triumphantly as she passed the guitar to her left to Mel.
"The five of us like Beast,
he's a sensitive artiste,
Our respect for hims increased"
"Do I have to?" I asked as the guitar got passed to me sigh
"And nobody here likes Jean,
She walks around like she's a queen,
Has anybody got caffeine?"
Now it was Ev's turn who strummed a silky soft tune and sang in a husky voice
"There's never been a man like Scott,
He thinks he's such a big shot,
But I think he's lost the plot!"
We looked at the Professor who didn't seem amused.
"Okay Girls who wants to sing Henry the 8th again?" Jubilee asked
"Okay, Okay! Have it you way I'll get you another tutor just don't sing that…wretched song"
#This means WAR#
"Umm…Professor your projecting your thoughts again!"
An Hour Later in Professor X's study
"I'm sure your all anxious to know who your new teacher is" The Professor said (was that a smirk I noticed on his face?)
The 5 of us sat with images of our new best friend the Dictionary being our teacher, Rogue (ok she had her hands full of our rivals otherwise known…well by us, as the tarts), Remy may be good (what a great teacher he would be rewarding us with drinking sprees) or even Kurt, none of us, I repeat none of us was ready for what came next.
"As you are aware we are short of faculty staff, hence why you had Logan in the first place, I've decided you need two teachers who will both work with you on a part time basis." The look on the professor's face could not be mistaken.
"No not that surely not that!" I thought aloud "What kind of monster are you"
"Scott, Jean come out and meet you new class"
At that point all of Retribution X did what any sane person would do and began clawing at the door in the manner of an insane caged rat. When we realised escape was futile we turned round and stared angrily at our tormentor.
Everyone looked at each other and asked "What have we done?"
Everyone that is except Kat who asked "What kind of Monster have we created?"
Then she blushed and added "Sorry wrong conversation"
Scott stepped forward and spoke "Hello as many of you are aware I am Mr Summers and this is my wife Mrs Grey-Summers." He paused surveying the situation as he might if he was about to launch into battle "I would like you to be aware that from now on Retribution X will be more then just a team we will be a family as well…"
Snore
I jabbed Jubilee sharply in the ribs, after all this whole boycott Wolverine thing had been her idea, and I was damned if I was going to let her sleep through the consequences.
"Now I don't know how things operated under Logan but me and my husband believe in the early to bed early to rise policy, so you shall be awoken at 5:30 approximately ready for an early morning training session at 6:00 sharp" Jean stopped and looked adoringly at Ken…sorry Scott.
"I'm not going to stand for this" Jubilee yelled and for the second time that morning stomped out of a room with us hot on her heels
