Okay, some people are confused. In this universe pretty much a lot of the same things have happened as in the regular cartoon continuity, except for the fact that no one recognized our mutants. Its pretty much the same theory as the fact that no one recognizes Clark Kent as Superman when he puts his glasses on.
Todd: In other words a lot of the same stuff has happened before Ronin Toad huh? That's taking the easy way out!
Hey this is fanfiction, not rocket science folks. Just read and enjoy!
Campfire Capers and Confessions
"Someone's singing Lord, Kumbya!" Footloose sang happily as the X-Men, Misfits and Joes sat around the campfire. He strummed a guitar and sang at the top of his lungs. "Someone's singing Lord, Kumbya! Someone's singing Lord, Kumbya! Oh Lord Kumbyaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"
"Who made you the Camp Counselor in charge of torturing us?" Shipwreck snarled.
Footloose ignored him and kept singing, even though he wasn't doing a very good job of it. "Someone's being happy Lord…"
"Well whoever he is, it's definitely not us," Pietro had his fingers in his ears as Footloose sang.
"God I miss TV," Tabitha moaned.
"Where the hell are Logan and Jinx?" Ororo grumbled under her breath.
"Yeah they should be here to suffer with the rest of us as well!" Low Light agreed.
"When I catch 'em I'm gonna give 'em hell," Roadblock grimaced.
"Come on everyone!" Footloose called out. "Let's all take turns at singing!"
"Let's not and say we did," Shipwreck snapped.
"I knew I should have brought my rifle," Low Light grumbled. "Why didn't I bring my rifle?"
"Okay Low Light you sing!" Footloose shouted cheerfully as he kept playing.
"Someone's gonna stuff a bunch of pinecones down Footloose's throat Lord, Kumbya!" Low Light sang. "Someone's gonna stuff a bunch of poison ivy up his ass Lord Kumbya! If he doesn't stop with the stupid songs he's gonna die a slow and painful death Kumbya! Oh lord Kumbya!"
"Okay that's enough with the singing," Footloose stopped strumming his guitar. "How about some campfire stories?"
"Now you're talking!" Shipwreck said. "Let me tell you the tale of how I once saved the world from giant vegetables with my special sour cream sauce!"
"That was a team effort you dip," Alpine groaned.
"Giant vegetables?" Bobby asked. "You're kidding?"
"Sounds corny to me," Todd grinned.
"No it really did happen," Bazooka told him.
"Get out of here," Forge said.
"He's right," Roadblock said. "It did. Damn things took over the entire city of Chicago before we stopped 'em."
"They did taste pretty good," Bazooka said.
"Pull the other one!" Kurt snorted.
"It's true I tell ya!" Shipwreck said. "Just like the time I saved the world from a giant blob by feeding it a million apples!"
"What?" Rogue asked.
"Forget the TV," Tabitha waved. "Althea your Dad cooks up much better plots."
"That's not exactly what happened," Roadblock waved.
"Yeah but I came up with the plan!" Shipwreck said.
"Well that's sort of true," Bazooka scratched his head. "It was your idea to give the poison a candy coating."
"Back up," Kitty held up her hand. "Could somebody explain what you guys are talking about, please?"
"Well long story short Cobra created this huge pink blob that was rampaging through the country," Footloose told them. "We tried everything but it turned out that all we did was make it split in half! So we like had two pink giant blobs destroying everything in its path! But then we realized that apple seeds had tiny amounts of poison in them. So we tricked the blobs into digesting a few orchards and…"
"Oh give me a break!" Bobby snapped. "That is the stupidest story I have ever heard!"
"I got a story!" Bazooka piped up. "About the time I saw a sea serpent!"
"You really saw a real live sea serpent?" Jamie asked.
"Well actually it was a robot sea serpent," Bazooka told him. "You see Cobra forced this scientist to make it so they could rob the world's cargo ships. But it ended up eating Cobra Commander too."
"I stand corrected," Bobby grumbled. "That is the stupidest story I have ever heard!"
"Giant vegetables, rampaging blobs destroyed by apples, and now mechanical sea serpents?" Roberto shook his head. "Do you guys really expect us to believe all this?"
"But it's true!" Bazooka said.
"Yeah!" Althea told them.
"Okay can we move on to real campfire stories?" Kitty asked.
"Yeah let's have some scary ones!" Sam shouted. "Hey Low Light you gotta know some scary stories!"
"The stories I know will give you nightmares for the rest of your lives," Low Light gave an evil grin. The light from the campfire gave a menacing glow to his face.
"Okay not that scary," Kitty gulped.
"Yeah we're looking for fun here," Tabitha told him.
"I got a story," Fred grinned.
Ten minutes later…
"Slowly the boy opened the door to the barn…" Fred spoke slowly. "And then he saw the horror! The horror! The cows were staggering around the barn. The farmhands had gotten them wasted again! But to the boy's horror their horns were glistening with blood…blooooooodddd! It truly was the Night of the Cow! MOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"Oh lord this is so lame!" Ray groaned.
"I told you guys not to listen to any of Blob's farm stories!" Lance said.
"I'm never gonna look at hamburgers the same way again," Bobby groaned.
"That's it!" Shipwreck stood up. "I am going to find Logan and Jinx and drag them back here if I have too!"
"Yeah no way we are gonna suffer alone!" Cover Girl stood up.
"I want to come with you!" Ororo said. The three of them went off to find them.
"Okay now who wants to tell another story?" Footloose asked.
"Yeah preferably one that doesn't make us retch," Low Light grumbled.
"Low Light that ain't right!" Roadblock reprimanded.
"I'll tell a story!" Footloose said enthusiastically. "I know a really happy one!"
"You wanna take a walk?" Low Light asked Roadblock. "Maybe see if by some miracle a Cobra patrol is in the woods or something?"
"Please," Roadblock got up and followed him.
"Oh thanks a lot guys," Alpine grumbled underneath his breath. "Maybe I'd better tell the story…about Headless Hook Hand Pete."
"Now we're talkin'," Bobby grinned.
"Do you have to tell that story," Bazooka gulped.
"What? Don't tell me that story still scares you?" Alpine chuckled.
"Nuh uh…" Bazooka defended. "But it might scare the kids!"
"Only if we're lucky," Ray said.
Ten minutes later Alpine was well into the story. "And then…the scraping sound was heard again at the car door," Alpine spoke in a spooky voice. "They looked up and saw a coat…and a silver hook…but there wasn't a face in sight!"
"AAAAGGGGHHH!" Bazooka shot up. "HEADLESS HOOK HAND PETE'S GONNA GET US! AGGGGGHHHH!" He ran in terror from the campfire.
"Bazooka it was just a story dude!" Footloose shouted as he chased Bazooka.
"We'd better go get him before he gets lost again," Alpine stood up and went after him as well.
"Well this is a camping experience we'll never forget," Kurt grumbled. "No matter how hard we try."
"Okay now that the adults are gone let me tell you about the story I heard about the hooker, the lost cheerleaders and the horny forest rangers," Pietro rubbed his hands together.
"Pietro you are not telling that story!" Rogue snapped.
"Yeah for one thing you can't talk about stuff like that in front of Jamie!" Kitty fumed.
"Who do you think told me the story in the first place?" Pietro asked.
Everyone looked at Jamie. "Hey I spend a lot of time on the Internet okay?" Jamie looked at them.
"I think a little too much time," Remy remarked.
"You know for a little kid you're becoming quite the pervert aren't you?" Bobby snickered at Jamie.
"Yeah well I may be shorter than all of you but at least I never wet my bed," Jamie glared at Bobby.
"I told you that some of my ice melted during the night," Bobby said coldly.
"Yeah right," Jamie snickered. "Just like Peter doesn't practice kissing Kitty with his pillow at night."
"I DO NOT!" Peter shouted. He looked very embarrassed. "I just happened to have a very vivid dream one night. That's all."
"Roberto's even worse," Ray snickered. "I caught him practicing kissing with his hand. You know, making sure there was an opening in it so he could stick his tongue…"
"Okay way too much information here!" Kitty held up her hands.
"You jerk!" Roberto snapped. "I'd love to tell everyone what I caught you doing the other day, but I'm too much of a gentleman to say it around the girls!"
"All right!" Pietro rubbed his hands. "Dirt! I love it!"
"Well you'll love this," Fred said. "Remember the time Pietro tried to hypnotize us but ended getting hypnotized himself?"
"BLOB!" Pietro snapped.
"Oh yeah!" Kitty snickered. "You guys gotta see that video! It's hilarious!"
"There's a video?" Amara asked.
"Oh we have quite a collection," Todd nodded. "You should see it. Well half of it is all the stupid stuff Lance did while trying to get Kitty to like him, but it's pretty funny. Not to mention pathetic."
"This from a guy who once got beat up by a squirrel," Lance snickered.
"He did not beat me up! I lost my balance and fell out of the tree!" Todd turned red. Everyone laughed. "Hey stop laughing at me! I was tired and hungry and we were on the run from the army! Remember?"
"What?" Xi blinked.
"When mutants got exposed on the media," Lance told him. "We told you about that."
"Oh yes," Xi nodded. "So you did."
"Face it Toad, you got your butt whooped by a furry little rodent," Lance snickered. "How pathetic!"
"Yeah well what was your excuse when that rabbit cleaned your clock?" Todd shot back.
"SHUT UP!" Lance shouted.
"What?" Everyone asked.
"What's this about a rabbit?" Kitty asked.
"Lance had this stupid idea of us trying to catch a bunny rabbit for dinner," Todd pointed at Lance. "He had us running around like a bunch of saps banging into each other. And when the rabbit got away he had a nervous breakdown! You guys remember that?"
"Toad!" Lance snapped.
"Yeah he did a great 'Gone With the Wind' impersonation," Fred nodded. "He went totally bonkers. Had to dip him in the river to knock some sense into him."
"You're kidding?" Bobby laughed.
"Nope," Fred shook his head. "He was also moping about Kitty!"
"Oh Kitty!" Todd wailed mockingly. "Kitty! My lost love Kitty! Kitty!"
"SHUT UP!" Lance shouted. Everyone was laughing around the campfire. "STOP LAUGHING AT ME! IT'S NOT FUNNY!"
"The hell it isn't!" Pietro snickered.
"That's priceless!" Peter roared and slapped his thigh.
"You swore an oath!" Lance roared. "You all promised me that you'd never mention the rabbit incident ever to another living soul! Not even to Quicksilver!"
"If you recall that was contingent on you never mentioning the squirrel incident!" Todd snapped. "So don't put the blame on me! You started it."
"Yeah I almost forgot about all that," Fred chuckled. "You remember Wanda?"
"How could I forget?" Wanda snapped. "You idiots all barged in on me while I was in the bushes! It's the second most embarrassing memory I have!"
"The second?" Tabitha asked. "What was the first?"
"I'll bet the first was when you found out that you were kissing Toad right?" Kurt asked.
"WHAT?" Everyone else shouted.
"You kissed Toad?" Rogue looked at Wanda.
"Ewwwwwwwwww," Kitty flinched.
"You kissed Wanda?" Althea looked at Todd. "When was this?" She glared at Kitty. "And what do you mean 'Ewwwwwwww'?"
"Yeah it wasn't that bad!" Wanda snapped. Then she slapped her hand on her face. "Please someone tell me I didn't say that!"
"WHAT?" Althea stood up rapidly.
"Catfight! Catfight!" Bobby shouted excitedly.
"For Pete's sake Iceman grow up will ya?" Jamie groaned.
"Okay!" Althea pointed at Todd. "Story! NOW!"
"Oh this is gonna be good," Ray snickered.
"Toad is gonna get it!" Pietro snickered.
"Shut up!" Todd snapped at Pietro.
"Start talking Tolensky!" Althea shouted.
"Now sweetie, please…" Todd gulped. "I can explain. It's kind of funny really."
"You got that right," Kurt said. "You used my image inducer to look like some blond ski instructor!"
"Oh well that explains it," Pietro waved. "I knew my sister had more sense than to kiss Toad."
"You were posing as someone else in order to get a kiss from Wanda?" Althea asked.
"Well…yeah," Todd gulped. "You see I thought she'd like me better if she thought I was a handsome blond Swedish ski instructor."
"I can't believe it," Althea said.
"Neither can I," Kurt shook his head. "Especially how he mangled that accent."
"I thought I did a pretty good job," Todd said. "Considering I only had a few minutes."
"A few minutes?" Tabitha looked at Wanda.
"Hey give me a break! My father had Mastermind screw around with my memories!" Wanda said. "I wasn't exactly in the right state of mind to begin with."
"That sounds ideal for Toad to get a kiss in the first place," Kitty said.
"This from a girl who's first kiss was from a guy she only knew for less than a week?" Rogue grunted.
"WHAT WAS THAT?" Peter and Lance shouted.
"Rogue!" Kitty shouted.
"Who was it?" Lance asked.
"Well it wasn't me that's for sure!" Peter shouted. "Who was it?"
"I'll bet it was Kurt!" Todd piped up. "Am I right?"
"None of your business!" Kitty fumed.
"Was it you?" Lance glared at Kurt.
"No it was not me!" Kurt told him.
"Not for lack of trying," Tabitha snickered.
"Well then who was it?" Peter asked.
"It was Jason," Rogue smirked.
"Jason? I can't believe it! Your first kiss was from Jason?" Peter shouted. "Who's Jason?"
"I remember him!" Kurt said. "He was the lead in the school play you and Rogue did a while back! When you did Dracula!"
"Way to go girlfriend!" Tabitha grinned. "He was cute!"
"That nerd?" Lance looked at her. "You actually kissed that nerd?"
"He wasn't a nerd!" Kitty snapped.
"Yeah Lance I remember him," Todd nodded. "He wasn't a nerd. He was a player."
"He was not a player!" Kitty fumed.
"Oh please," Fred waved. "Even Duncan didn't have that many girls falling over him."
"When did you kiss him anyway?" Kurt asked.
"Backstage after the play was over," Rogue told him.
"Rogue!" Kitty shouted. "That was like private!"
"Kitty half the cast saw him kissing you! How private could it get?" Rogue asked.
"How many boyfriends have you had Kitty?" Wanda asked.
"That's it! I'm outta here!" Kitty stood up and walked away.
"If this keeps up we won't have anyone left around the campfire," Xi remarked.
"You say that like it's a bad thing," Fred took out a marshmallow and roasted it on the fire with a twig. " More marshmallows for me!"
"Where is everybody anyway?" Lance asked.
"Mellow out Rocky," Tabitha said. "Its not like anything's gonna happen to us in the woods here."
That's when Kitty screamed….
Ooh! So what happens next? It's not what you think! But let's just say the adults are being a little naughty! Maybe it is what you think! Keep those suggestions coming!
