Author's Note: Hellooooooo, any reviews out there. Come on people, I know
you can do better then this. I don't care if it's mean; I just want the
truth so I can try to make it to your liking. Almost the only thing I won't
do is not having this story as a B/S story. Almost. So tell me all your
complaints and praises and if u don't want any one else to read it email it
2 me.
Disclaimer: Again this is not mine. I just like to twist their love lives to my liking. Hahaha. Evil Grin
Buffy woke to the sound of Spike sipping a blood filled mug. Buffy had not been ready to face Dawn or anyone else for that matter. She was still tired mentally, but physically she was fine. If only slayers could have super healing powers when it came to love and to friends. That would be so much better. As it was now she didn't think she could make it. But that made it all the more easier to sacrifice herself, if the time came.
When she thought about it she knew she did not have that much left to make her want to live, other than the love and friendship of a vamp- that sometimes she could not even stand.
Yes, Buffy was starting to like Spike but only as a friend. She wanted him to be clear on that. She could feel him watching her. He was lying on the floor. He made good with the promise of not trying to seduce her. And she appreciated that, even though she knew he wanted nothing more then her.
It hurt her to think about anything, there was to much pain in the last day. It had been to much. She had been kicked out of her own home and then that night Angel had left her. They always left her, and she was always left a lone. All slayers were.
"Slayer, you might as well stop pretending to be asleep. I can hear your heart beat," Spike said.
"I was not," she told him. He looked her in the face, mockingly serious. She couldn't help but giggle" Okay so I was, so get all mean and grumpy on me," she said, a fake pout on her lips. Then she remembered every thing that had happened in the last day, and slowly the grin turned into a frown and the frown turned into to soft silent tears.
He of course could feel the change in the room. He quickly got up and went to her. He didn't say anything to her, he just let her cry on his shoulder.
"Spike, I'm going to go out and get something to eat and some fresh air. Maybe it will do me some good. Do you want anything?" she asked him
"No, thanks". He let her climb up and get dressed in the top part of his crypt. He heard her slam the door shut. He didn't think she would be back, though where she would go, he didn't know. Buffy slowly walked around the town, not hungry. Despite herself she walked toward her old home. She stood at the tree she knew Spike had looked from, to watch her. She saw Faith and SIT's training and Dawn sitting on the couch staring off into the dark. Almost like a normal day, except it was missing her. Then She saw Giles look at the window and see her. She tried to move away and not let him see her. She would ask Spike how he never got caught when she went out. Her first reaction was to run, but she just stood there. She had a right to be walking. Giles came walking toward her.
"Buffy, I'm sorry," he said
"Giles, don't," she said. "You know what gets me, I said I could only trust Spike, but you guys were the ones I loved. And yet, you betrayed me, I guess I was right only to trust Spike. You were always like a dad to me Giles, so I guess it's just normal for you to run out on me, just like my real dad did. Dawn," she said, her voice broke in a quiet sob. "Dawn was my sister, she has my own blood running in her veins and she kicked me out. Do you know what that feels like, Giles? No. Well, now I do. So good luck with Faith, I hope you become close to her. And she gets to be like a daughter to you. Cause all you guys deserve her and each other". With that she turned and ran. Sobbing as she went. The thing she wanted most right then was Spike's arms around her to soothe her and tell her he loved her.
Disclaimer: Again this is not mine. I just like to twist their love lives to my liking. Hahaha. Evil Grin
Buffy woke to the sound of Spike sipping a blood filled mug. Buffy had not been ready to face Dawn or anyone else for that matter. She was still tired mentally, but physically she was fine. If only slayers could have super healing powers when it came to love and to friends. That would be so much better. As it was now she didn't think she could make it. But that made it all the more easier to sacrifice herself, if the time came.
When she thought about it she knew she did not have that much left to make her want to live, other than the love and friendship of a vamp- that sometimes she could not even stand.
Yes, Buffy was starting to like Spike but only as a friend. She wanted him to be clear on that. She could feel him watching her. He was lying on the floor. He made good with the promise of not trying to seduce her. And she appreciated that, even though she knew he wanted nothing more then her.
It hurt her to think about anything, there was to much pain in the last day. It had been to much. She had been kicked out of her own home and then that night Angel had left her. They always left her, and she was always left a lone. All slayers were.
"Slayer, you might as well stop pretending to be asleep. I can hear your heart beat," Spike said.
"I was not," she told him. He looked her in the face, mockingly serious. She couldn't help but giggle" Okay so I was, so get all mean and grumpy on me," she said, a fake pout on her lips. Then she remembered every thing that had happened in the last day, and slowly the grin turned into a frown and the frown turned into to soft silent tears.
He of course could feel the change in the room. He quickly got up and went to her. He didn't say anything to her, he just let her cry on his shoulder.
"Spike, I'm going to go out and get something to eat and some fresh air. Maybe it will do me some good. Do you want anything?" she asked him
"No, thanks". He let her climb up and get dressed in the top part of his crypt. He heard her slam the door shut. He didn't think she would be back, though where she would go, he didn't know. Buffy slowly walked around the town, not hungry. Despite herself she walked toward her old home. She stood at the tree she knew Spike had looked from, to watch her. She saw Faith and SIT's training and Dawn sitting on the couch staring off into the dark. Almost like a normal day, except it was missing her. Then She saw Giles look at the window and see her. She tried to move away and not let him see her. She would ask Spike how he never got caught when she went out. Her first reaction was to run, but she just stood there. She had a right to be walking. Giles came walking toward her.
"Buffy, I'm sorry," he said
"Giles, don't," she said. "You know what gets me, I said I could only trust Spike, but you guys were the ones I loved. And yet, you betrayed me, I guess I was right only to trust Spike. You were always like a dad to me Giles, so I guess it's just normal for you to run out on me, just like my real dad did. Dawn," she said, her voice broke in a quiet sob. "Dawn was my sister, she has my own blood running in her veins and she kicked me out. Do you know what that feels like, Giles? No. Well, now I do. So good luck with Faith, I hope you become close to her. And she gets to be like a daughter to you. Cause all you guys deserve her and each other". With that she turned and ran. Sobbing as she went. The thing she wanted most right then was Spike's arms around her to soothe her and tell her he loved her.
