-Severus Snape-
One week later...
I crouched silently behind a shrubbery, peeking between the whispy branches in the dead of the night, ready to attack my next target; a lone Death Eater, taking a swim in a slow-moving river. He was most likely a lazy sort, a great follower who has no intention to gain power; only protection. Working for Voldemort was a stressful task, but nothing rivers could fix. I wasn't sure who he was; all I could see was his silhouette.
I had killed four more Death Eaters since the first. That makes five in all; thirty more or so left to go. Of course Voldemort knows it was me that did it, and it's surprising he hasn't done anything yet to stop it. I'm on my toes every second, wand ready at any small noise or passing shadow, but I know if he were to come after me at the time, I would not stand much of a chance. I don't know how angry he is about the losses, but I do know that he's taking followers much more cautiously these days. That was indeed my own influence; probably an impact that will result in more loyal servants in the future. His big head is an advantage, I noted; he gushes at anyone who will grovel at his feet.
The man in the river was not naked, thank God. I don't think I would be watching him if he were. He stepped out of the water wearing what looked to be a rolled-up sleeved undershirt and perhaps a pair of jeans. The man wrung his thick hair out onto the grass he kneaded with his bare toes. This was my chance to get him. Number six.
I leapt from the brush and brandished my wand, pointing it, ready for a wandless struggle from the man; quite an enjoyable experience, if I do say so myself. Before I could get within six meteers of him, he spoke.
"Hold it, Severus," he said. I knew that arrogant voice and almost laughed outright. It was Lucius Malfoy, and I was going to kill him next! Best choice just under Voldemort.
"What a pleasure seeing you here," I said softly, grinning slightly and pacing up to him; he who looked so ready to die.
"I could say the same," Lucius replied calmly. His eyes flicked from mine to behind me, and before I knew it, I was tackled to the ground from behind.
"Don't let him go!" I heard Malfoy order to the man who had body slammed me, and the guy seemed to want to squeeze my life out. He had knocked the wind out of me from the fall, and I couldn't even budge under his enormous, strong hold.
"Yessir," the man grunted, and I recognized his voice as Crabbe's, the good for nothing piece of gorilla shit.
"Get off!" I demanded, my voice muffled from beneath the giant. I couldn't move an inch, and I didn't like it one bit. "Get off me, damn you!"
"Hold him steady, Crabbe," Malfoy instructed over my shouting. "Hold him up."
I was whiplashed like a rag doll up to my knees all at once, and Crabbe kneeled on my feet, his arms in front of mine so he could pin my elbows to my sides while holding me in a death grip upright.
"You'll pay for that, Malfoy!" I threatened. He smirked.
"Really? I don't think so," he said mockingly, stepping right up to me. I tried to lunge for him, but of course I couldn't make even the smallest move. "Because you have nothing, isn't that right? Not with the Death Eaters, and not with the Ministry, correct? A lone rebel. A lone rebel who's going to die without a trace. Without one person in the whol world who even actually CARES. I think I'm doing everyone a favor by getting rid of you. How does it sound? Just give up now. You're just one more for the junk pile." He got down right in my face; Crabbe merely had to shift me into one of his gigantic hands to hold my head in place. I was going to kill him one day. I really was. "Send me a postcard from hell, all right?"
I spat in his face.
Malfoy drew back, momentarily disgusted, but recovered quickly, kicking me swiftly. Pain flashed through my body, and I struggled limply against Crabbe's iron grip. Malfoy grinned wickedly, wiping his face while shouting: "You know what to do! Kill him. Kill him nice and slowly." He turned his back and strode away, leading about fifteen Death Eaters to wherever Crabbe was to pull me off to. I myself had participated in many torture killings... ironic, isn't it? There was no way of getting out of this one; I had dropped my wand, and it lay only inches from me. But inches were enough.
Crabbe jolted me off my feet, still with my arms pinned behind my back so I was literally being dragged a step behind him at a time. I tried to keep up with his forward long strides, but I was only able to stumble backwards at best.
"You big flake, unhand me!" I growled to the ape alone. "You'll be dead the moment you loosen your-"
I was thrown harshly to the ground, standing furiously to see a circle of Death Eaters around me.
"Fools!" I spat, babbling in my panic. "Damn fools, stop this now! You can't kill me! You just wait until-"
I was cut off again when a Death Eater from behind struck me on the side of the head. I cursed and leapt for the man, but he withdrew his wand too quickly.
"CRUCIO!" he shouted.
It took all my strength to keep from crying out, but soon the spell became to powerful. I screamed death threats at every one of them, refusing to give in to apparent cries of pain.
The other Death Eaters joined in with the one man who continued to use the cruciatus on me; their voices were lust-stricken and I could tell that they were enjoying their imaginitive curses. Oh, I was stupid; shouldn't I have known that they would figure me out sooner or later? But I never expected this...
I saw nothing but the jets of light being shot out of wands, and I was deaf to everything but my own swearing and threats and shouts of anything I could think of, anything but cries of pain or cries for help, no, I wouldn't do that, I wouldn't give them that one gratification, I would not give in to them, I would stand until I died, I would stand in death, but no pain, no suffering, no pleading, no crying, no weakness, no, I won't do it, I won't let them take me so easily, I am Severus Snape and I do not bow to the slaves of madmen, I am Severus Snape, I am
My threats slowly turned manic, then suddenly transformed into hysterical laughter. I wouldn't allow myself to stop. I would not give in to the Death Eaters who were closing in, closer, closer, I couldn't breathe, the were so close; I was so far away... I couldn't hear myself anymore, but I wasn't unconscious; and they kept swarming, having ambushed me like I had done four of their men, five counting the one who retaliated.
Everything was silent; deathly silent.
I tried to speak; nothing. I couldn't move. I couldn't think. I felt nonbeing. At the same time, I was suffering. Suffering like I've never suffered before; excruciating, terrible pain; and I deserved every bit of it that had come so fast. Fading. Blur. Nothing.
Snape, you're not just going to die there, are you?
Maybe I am. I don't want to. Do I have a choice?
Yes, you do. Now listen up.
What if I don't want to?
Do you want to do anything?
No.
Then maybe you were supposed to die. Right now. Like this. Alone. In pain.
I'm supposed to die fighting, right? That's what they all want.
Who's 'they all'? The other Death Eaters? You don't want to be like them.
I have no choice, I am like them.
You have a choice; don't be like them.
I can't help it.
Yes you can.
No I can't, look what I've gotten into.
Yes, and now you're going to fix yourself up.
How?
Wake up.
I am awake.
Open your eyes!
They are open!
WAKE UP!
I tore my eyes open and everything came back. The world wasn't over, and I wasn't dead... but the Death Eater's were gone, and I was by myself, on the ground, feelings as if I had been turned inside out and soaked in rubbing alcohol.
But I was alive. Who cares how?
I knew what I had to do; I had to do better; be better. This is my second chance. And I wasn't going to screw things up this time!
I had made my decision; I was going to find the
A/N: For those of yeh who don't know, and are mildly confused by that last line... well... Snapey bit the dust, a'ight? Not dead yet, and still so much more to come! ENJOY! :D :D :D :D :D
One week later...
I crouched silently behind a shrubbery, peeking between the whispy branches in the dead of the night, ready to attack my next target; a lone Death Eater, taking a swim in a slow-moving river. He was most likely a lazy sort, a great follower who has no intention to gain power; only protection. Working for Voldemort was a stressful task, but nothing rivers could fix. I wasn't sure who he was; all I could see was his silhouette.
I had killed four more Death Eaters since the first. That makes five in all; thirty more or so left to go. Of course Voldemort knows it was me that did it, and it's surprising he hasn't done anything yet to stop it. I'm on my toes every second, wand ready at any small noise or passing shadow, but I know if he were to come after me at the time, I would not stand much of a chance. I don't know how angry he is about the losses, but I do know that he's taking followers much more cautiously these days. That was indeed my own influence; probably an impact that will result in more loyal servants in the future. His big head is an advantage, I noted; he gushes at anyone who will grovel at his feet.
The man in the river was not naked, thank God. I don't think I would be watching him if he were. He stepped out of the water wearing what looked to be a rolled-up sleeved undershirt and perhaps a pair of jeans. The man wrung his thick hair out onto the grass he kneaded with his bare toes. This was my chance to get him. Number six.
I leapt from the brush and brandished my wand, pointing it, ready for a wandless struggle from the man; quite an enjoyable experience, if I do say so myself. Before I could get within six meteers of him, he spoke.
"Hold it, Severus," he said. I knew that arrogant voice and almost laughed outright. It was Lucius Malfoy, and I was going to kill him next! Best choice just under Voldemort.
"What a pleasure seeing you here," I said softly, grinning slightly and pacing up to him; he who looked so ready to die.
"I could say the same," Lucius replied calmly. His eyes flicked from mine to behind me, and before I knew it, I was tackled to the ground from behind.
"Don't let him go!" I heard Malfoy order to the man who had body slammed me, and the guy seemed to want to squeeze my life out. He had knocked the wind out of me from the fall, and I couldn't even budge under his enormous, strong hold.
"Yessir," the man grunted, and I recognized his voice as Crabbe's, the good for nothing piece of gorilla shit.
"Get off!" I demanded, my voice muffled from beneath the giant. I couldn't move an inch, and I didn't like it one bit. "Get off me, damn you!"
"Hold him steady, Crabbe," Malfoy instructed over my shouting. "Hold him up."
I was whiplashed like a rag doll up to my knees all at once, and Crabbe kneeled on my feet, his arms in front of mine so he could pin my elbows to my sides while holding me in a death grip upright.
"You'll pay for that, Malfoy!" I threatened. He smirked.
"Really? I don't think so," he said mockingly, stepping right up to me. I tried to lunge for him, but of course I couldn't make even the smallest move. "Because you have nothing, isn't that right? Not with the Death Eaters, and not with the Ministry, correct? A lone rebel. A lone rebel who's going to die without a trace. Without one person in the whol world who even actually CARES. I think I'm doing everyone a favor by getting rid of you. How does it sound? Just give up now. You're just one more for the junk pile." He got down right in my face; Crabbe merely had to shift me into one of his gigantic hands to hold my head in place. I was going to kill him one day. I really was. "Send me a postcard from hell, all right?"
I spat in his face.
Malfoy drew back, momentarily disgusted, but recovered quickly, kicking me swiftly. Pain flashed through my body, and I struggled limply against Crabbe's iron grip. Malfoy grinned wickedly, wiping his face while shouting: "You know what to do! Kill him. Kill him nice and slowly." He turned his back and strode away, leading about fifteen Death Eaters to wherever Crabbe was to pull me off to. I myself had participated in many torture killings... ironic, isn't it? There was no way of getting out of this one; I had dropped my wand, and it lay only inches from me. But inches were enough.
Crabbe jolted me off my feet, still with my arms pinned behind my back so I was literally being dragged a step behind him at a time. I tried to keep up with his forward long strides, but I was only able to stumble backwards at best.
"You big flake, unhand me!" I growled to the ape alone. "You'll be dead the moment you loosen your-"
I was thrown harshly to the ground, standing furiously to see a circle of Death Eaters around me.
"Fools!" I spat, babbling in my panic. "Damn fools, stop this now! You can't kill me! You just wait until-"
I was cut off again when a Death Eater from behind struck me on the side of the head. I cursed and leapt for the man, but he withdrew his wand too quickly.
"CRUCIO!" he shouted.
It took all my strength to keep from crying out, but soon the spell became to powerful. I screamed death threats at every one of them, refusing to give in to apparent cries of pain.
The other Death Eaters joined in with the one man who continued to use the cruciatus on me; their voices were lust-stricken and I could tell that they were enjoying their imaginitive curses. Oh, I was stupid; shouldn't I have known that they would figure me out sooner or later? But I never expected this...
I saw nothing but the jets of light being shot out of wands, and I was deaf to everything but my own swearing and threats and shouts of anything I could think of, anything but cries of pain or cries for help, no, I wouldn't do that, I wouldn't give them that one gratification, I would not give in to them, I would stand until I died, I would stand in death, but no pain, no suffering, no pleading, no crying, no weakness, no, I won't do it, I won't let them take me so easily, I am Severus Snape and I do not bow to the slaves of madmen, I am Severus Snape, I am
My threats slowly turned manic, then suddenly transformed into hysterical laughter. I wouldn't allow myself to stop. I would not give in to the Death Eaters who were closing in, closer, closer, I couldn't breathe, the were so close; I was so far away... I couldn't hear myself anymore, but I wasn't unconscious; and they kept swarming, having ambushed me like I had done four of their men, five counting the one who retaliated.
Everything was silent; deathly silent.
I tried to speak; nothing. I couldn't move. I couldn't think. I felt nonbeing. At the same time, I was suffering. Suffering like I've never suffered before; excruciating, terrible pain; and I deserved every bit of it that had come so fast. Fading. Blur. Nothing.
Snape, you're not just going to die there, are you?
Maybe I am. I don't want to. Do I have a choice?
Yes, you do. Now listen up.
What if I don't want to?
Do you want to do anything?
No.
Then maybe you were supposed to die. Right now. Like this. Alone. In pain.
I'm supposed to die fighting, right? That's what they all want.
Who's 'they all'? The other Death Eaters? You don't want to be like them.
I have no choice, I am like them.
You have a choice; don't be like them.
I can't help it.
Yes you can.
No I can't, look what I've gotten into.
Yes, and now you're going to fix yourself up.
How?
Wake up.
I am awake.
Open your eyes!
They are open!
WAKE UP!
I tore my eyes open and everything came back. The world wasn't over, and I wasn't dead... but the Death Eater's were gone, and I was by myself, on the ground, feelings as if I had been turned inside out and soaked in rubbing alcohol.
But I was alive. Who cares how?
I knew what I had to do; I had to do better; be better. This is my second chance. And I wasn't going to screw things up this time!
I had made my decision; I was going to find the
A/N: For those of yeh who don't know, and are mildly confused by that last line... well... Snapey bit the dust, a'ight? Not dead yet, and still so much more to come! ENJOY! :D :D :D :D :D
