**Sorry this is short guys, I had better things to do. So this is just kind of a transitional chapter....oh, and I forgot a disclaimer at the beginning so....the Harry Potter characters are owned by J.K. Rowling and um, not me. However, the humor is 100% mine! ;o) ENJOY!
(Harry hurries up the stairs to Gryffindor Tower, racing through the common room to his dormitory. Odd noises and giggles are coming from beneath the covers of Ron's bed, but they stop abruptly when Harry throws open the door.)
Harry: I know you're in there, Ron! Why didn't you come to Potions today?
Ron: (in a high, squeaky voice) I'm not Ron, I'm Cho, I'm waiting for you to come and claim me you hot, sexy animal of a man!
Harry: Ron, what are you playing at? Come out of there!
(Harry pulls back the covers on Ron's bed to discover not only the red-haired hottie, but also Hermione, both of them covered in what appears to be several gallons of whipped cream.)
Ron: Um, its not what it looks like?
Harry: It looks like you gave Hermione a little sugar while I was stuck in the dungeons with Malfoy!
Hermione: Okay, then it's exactly what it looks like.
Ron: C'mon Harry, don't be a playa hata!
Hermione: Really Harry, just because Ron in phenomenal in bed doesn't mean you'll never find anyone. Honestly, stop being such a prat!
Ron: Hey Narrator, do you even know what a prat is?
(Not a clue, they just use it a lot in the Harry Potter books, I figured it was some kind of English insult.)
Harry: Well, I have study hall this period, since Divination got cancelled.
Ron: Why was it cancelled?
Harry: Professor Trelawney convinced herself she could fly and threw herself from North Tower. Too much crystal-gazing is my guess.
Ron: Or maybe that was all that crack I slipped in her tea?
Hermione: (giggling) Oh, you two are so bad! (Growls flirtatiously like a sexed-up Downtown Sim)
Ron: You know what we ought to do, Harry? I reckon we better go visit Hagrid and send a letter to Sirius.
Harry: That's just what I was thinking!
Hermione: But why? Nothing's happened.
Ron: Hermione, that's just what we always do. Harry gets freaked out over a little bit of pain and we go running all over creation trying to keep him from getting himself killed.
Hermione: Good point Ron. Let's go then.
(Harry, Ron, and Hermione begin their journey up to the owlery, but stop when they hear a noise coming from a bathroom near them.)
Harry: Eeek, it's Voldemort!
(Harry hides himself behind Ron, who is still wearing nothing but whipped cream.)
Hermione: Cripes, you really are an idiot, aren't you? It's not Voldemort. It's only Moaning Myrtle, what would Voldemort be doing in a bathroom?
Harry: Um, using the facilities?
Ron: Ewww, that's disgusting! Storybook characters don't do stuff like that.
Harry: OOOOOOH that explains my constant stomach ache.
Hermione: Come on boys, let's see if she's all right.
(The three of them sprint into the bathroom, looking wildly around for Myrtle.)
Ron: (spotting her) Myrtle….what the hell?
Myrtle: (giving them a watery smile) Do I look alright?
(Myrtle is wearing a glittery green gown and high lace up boots. Makeup covers her pearly face, and she is clutching a see through hanky, although she's not crying)
Hermione: Myrtle, what's going on? What are you wearing?
Myrtle: Well, Mr. Tim heard me crying in here, and he came in to see what was bothering me. What a great, kind man Mr. Tim is. Anyway, he helped me get in touch with my anger, and we're working through it together. His friends were in there when I came in, Marilyn and Vivian. They gave me this makeover, and they were ever so nice about it. I could tell they had more important stuff to talk about, when I left they were whispering something about Colorado, ten year olds, pie, and a superhero. Mr. Tim seemed really excited about it though.
Ron: (cautiously) Did they say anything else?
Myrtle: Actually, yes. The tall one was talking about you Ron. Or at least, I think she was. She kept saying something about somebody named Tallahassee, but the way she was talking made me think that it wasn't really a city, but a person. And she was talking about flaming red hair. The other one was kinda confusing, gibbering stuff about love potions and fishnet stockings.
Hermione: (excitedly) What a delightful mystery!
(Harry hurries up the stairs to Gryffindor Tower, racing through the common room to his dormitory. Odd noises and giggles are coming from beneath the covers of Ron's bed, but they stop abruptly when Harry throws open the door.)
Harry: I know you're in there, Ron! Why didn't you come to Potions today?
Ron: (in a high, squeaky voice) I'm not Ron, I'm Cho, I'm waiting for you to come and claim me you hot, sexy animal of a man!
Harry: Ron, what are you playing at? Come out of there!
(Harry pulls back the covers on Ron's bed to discover not only the red-haired hottie, but also Hermione, both of them covered in what appears to be several gallons of whipped cream.)
Ron: Um, its not what it looks like?
Harry: It looks like you gave Hermione a little sugar while I was stuck in the dungeons with Malfoy!
Hermione: Okay, then it's exactly what it looks like.
Ron: C'mon Harry, don't be a playa hata!
Hermione: Really Harry, just because Ron in phenomenal in bed doesn't mean you'll never find anyone. Honestly, stop being such a prat!
Ron: Hey Narrator, do you even know what a prat is?
(Not a clue, they just use it a lot in the Harry Potter books, I figured it was some kind of English insult.)
Harry: Well, I have study hall this period, since Divination got cancelled.
Ron: Why was it cancelled?
Harry: Professor Trelawney convinced herself she could fly and threw herself from North Tower. Too much crystal-gazing is my guess.
Ron: Or maybe that was all that crack I slipped in her tea?
Hermione: (giggling) Oh, you two are so bad! (Growls flirtatiously like a sexed-up Downtown Sim)
Ron: You know what we ought to do, Harry? I reckon we better go visit Hagrid and send a letter to Sirius.
Harry: That's just what I was thinking!
Hermione: But why? Nothing's happened.
Ron: Hermione, that's just what we always do. Harry gets freaked out over a little bit of pain and we go running all over creation trying to keep him from getting himself killed.
Hermione: Good point Ron. Let's go then.
(Harry, Ron, and Hermione begin their journey up to the owlery, but stop when they hear a noise coming from a bathroom near them.)
Harry: Eeek, it's Voldemort!
(Harry hides himself behind Ron, who is still wearing nothing but whipped cream.)
Hermione: Cripes, you really are an idiot, aren't you? It's not Voldemort. It's only Moaning Myrtle, what would Voldemort be doing in a bathroom?
Harry: Um, using the facilities?
Ron: Ewww, that's disgusting! Storybook characters don't do stuff like that.
Harry: OOOOOOH that explains my constant stomach ache.
Hermione: Come on boys, let's see if she's all right.
(The three of them sprint into the bathroom, looking wildly around for Myrtle.)
Ron: (spotting her) Myrtle….what the hell?
Myrtle: (giving them a watery smile) Do I look alright?
(Myrtle is wearing a glittery green gown and high lace up boots. Makeup covers her pearly face, and she is clutching a see through hanky, although she's not crying)
Hermione: Myrtle, what's going on? What are you wearing?
Myrtle: Well, Mr. Tim heard me crying in here, and he came in to see what was bothering me. What a great, kind man Mr. Tim is. Anyway, he helped me get in touch with my anger, and we're working through it together. His friends were in there when I came in, Marilyn and Vivian. They gave me this makeover, and they were ever so nice about it. I could tell they had more important stuff to talk about, when I left they were whispering something about Colorado, ten year olds, pie, and a superhero. Mr. Tim seemed really excited about it though.
Ron: (cautiously) Did they say anything else?
Myrtle: Actually, yes. The tall one was talking about you Ron. Or at least, I think she was. She kept saying something about somebody named Tallahassee, but the way she was talking made me think that it wasn't really a city, but a person. And she was talking about flaming red hair. The other one was kinda confusing, gibbering stuff about love potions and fishnet stockings.
Hermione: (excitedly) What a delightful mystery!
