A/N: And yet another installment. I hope you guys enjoy this! Don't forget to read and review- it makes my day :-)
Padme
After Anakin has woken up from his nightmares; before they leave for Tatooine
Every night for the past week it had happened. We'd say goodnight, I'd go into my room, and he would go into his. For a few hours, all was peaceful. Then it started. I would hear him tossing and turning, just a little bit at first, until it gradually escalated to where he's thrashing around and calling out her name. His mother's. He would have these nightmares, horrible dreams about her. Then he'd go out onto the balcony underneath my window and meditate. I don't think he knew that I watched him sometimes, but I did. When I saw him in the morning I could hardly tell he'd spent a sleepless night. I saw him torn between his duty to me and his love for his mother. I knew he wanted to go to her, but I stood in his way. It was killing him; I could tell.
And it was killing me too.
I was only a child myself when I met Shmi Skywalker, but her strength and inner peace impressed me. She was so sure of herself, so certain that what she did for Anakin was right. And it was. He has amazing Force powers; even I could see that. But I know he must have missed her. I know he must have been lonely, at least in those first years at the Jedi Temple. The only thing I didn't know then is why he would have those recurring dreams after all those years.
Unless it was a message from the Force.
He tried so hard to keep it all together; to meditate his troubles away. But it wasn't working. Every day his confusion and restlessness grew, and I didn't know what to do.
I was standing in front of a fork in the road. I could have stayed safely in my room, locked away from the real world, and not gotten involved. Undoubtedly, that would have been safest. I knew that if I comforted Anakin then on that deeply personal level, I'd never be able to ignore my feelings for him. Never again would I be able to retreat into my safe world of politics and pretend that saving the galaxy was all I cared about.
But I was tired of playing it safe. Some instinct was urging me on, driving me to take this risk. I wanted to go to Anakin, to comfort him and make everything all right, even though I didn't know if I could. It was then I realized how much I cared for him.
I loved him.
If I had to choose again, I would do the same thing. Quickly, before I lost my nerve, I threw on a robe, ran a brush through my hair, and crossed the room with a few strides. I paused at the door for just a moment. Once I go down there, I realized, there can be no turning back. Determinedly I turned the handle of the old-fashioned door.
And started towards my destiny.
