DISCLAIRMER: THANKS DUE TO J.K Once Again what is mine is mine a hers is hers. NO MONEY being made. And Credit to THING1 and stories about Remus and Katie.

SEPTEMBER FIRST

She knew it was rather unorthodoxed, teachers taking the train that left from platform nine and three quarters, but Dumbledore had requested they arrive this way. Professor Lupin had once been asked before to do this. It was because Sirius Black had been on the loose. Now it was because Voldemort was on the lose.

Remus slept next to her. Like always, the full moon had taken a lot out of him. She had given him a potion for him to regain his strength, but even it was only so effective. She herself was rather tired. His howling had kept her awake and the occasional yelp had caused her to run out to his shed and look in through the only window to see if he had hurt himself. It caused to her to cry every time. Her eyes were still slightly puffy from crying last night. She leaned herself against the opposite wall of the compartment. Just as she began to drift into a rather fitful sleep she was reawakened by the noise of their cabin filling with children.

"It's Professor Lupin," said a rather excited fifteen year-old male voice.

"Who's that?" said a different male boy.

"Another Professor," said a feminine voice in a tone near to condescending.

"Oh how do you know?" said the second male voice questioning her.

"Same way I knew last time, her bags," said the female in a rather matter- of-fact voice.

"Well if you know every thing what does she teach, Hermione?" said the same boy in retort.

"Well as far as I know there's only one position open and that's Defense Against the Dark Arts, Ron"

"But there are two Professors," said the boy the girl had called Ron.

"Ron, leave Hermione alone and let the Professors sleep you know what yesterday was," said the other boy.

At that statement Naria's eyes snapped open. They knew. How though? And then the answer came to her, Snape. Snape had told the Slytherins. The three had noticed. She suddenly recognized them from the description Lupin had given her. This was Harry Potter and his friends.

"Good morning Professor." Hermione said asking for her name at the same time.

"Professor Sojair," she said with a kind smile spreading across her face. She could remember being that age. "Are you fifth years?"

"Yeah. I'm Ron Weasley. This is Hermione Granger. And I'm certain you already know who this is," said Ron with a little bit of jealousy at the last part of the statement.

The other boy started blushing and looked away from her gaze while elbowing Ron in the side, which made her smile only widen. "Weasley. Author Weasley is your father?"

"Yes, Professor," the boy answered. "Do you know my father?"

"I used to work in the Ministry."

"What did you do for them?" the girl asked curiously.

"I was an Auror," Naria answered quietly.

"A real Auror," Ron said slightly excitedly.

"Yes. A real Auror," Naria said with amusement. The word "real" was exceptionally mirth filled.

"What do you teach?" asked Hermione.

"I'm going to teach Spells and take over for Professor Lupin when he is unable."

"Will Professor Lupin be teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts?" asked the other boy excitedly, speaking for the first time.

"Yes, Harry," she said with a knowing voice. A smile spread across the boy's face that made look as if him were twelve.

"Were you quite fond of the Professor?"

"Yes. We tried to convince him to stay before he left," said the girl. Naria was silently glad they had not been successful. She would not have met him other wise. Then the girl continued, "Do you know Professor Lupin?"

"Yes, we are acquainted," she answered with a secret smile.

"Spells. Has Professor Vector left?" asked the girl quietly.

"If he or she was your previous Spells teacher, then yes, I should think. Have any of you taken Spells?"

"No, it's a fifth year and above class," answered Ron.

"But we're all in it this year," said Harry.

"Why is it a fifth year class?" she asked. She already new the answer, but felt like asking any ways, considering that these would be her new students.

Hermione answered this one, "Because students need to learn how to use there wands first, that makes it easier to learns Spells."

"Very good, Hermione. If this was class I'd give Gryffindor ten points."

The girl wore a look that said she was very happy with her self and Ron sighed.

"Do you know any Spells, Hermione?"

"Oh yes. Last year I started practicing some I found in books in the Library," the girl answered.

"Oh, what Spells have you learned?"

"Just simple ones Professor. Like ones that make things enlarge and reduce."

"Engourga and Reduca?" Professor Sojair asked her.

"Yes, Madame."

"Maybe I'll ask you to display them in class."

Ron again sighed.

"What is it Ron?"

"Nothing, nothing, nothing," he muttered quietly. Already the boy was blushing and refused to meet her gaze.

-=(^)=-

Ron didn't meet the woman's gaze, but still he found himself staring like he stared at Vella. He silently wondered to himself whether she was actually a Vella, but he wouldn't ask. His eye flirted up and down her form, paying particular attention to her long locks of blonde hair.

Then, to his annoyance Hermione spoke indicated him, "He's wondering if your part Vella."

The woman snorted a laugh, "Vella? Me?"

Ron was already exceedingly embarrassed, but Hermione was just making it worse. "He has a particular fancy for them."

"All men have a particular fancy for them, dear," the Professor said with an ever-broadening smile.

This was going to be a long ride, Ron thought with grunt.

"Even with their two sides, they are enticed. Ron, look at me." He forced himself to look into her deep blue eyes in which he felt he could lose himself. "Do you think I am a Vella?"

"Um. Err. Yes," he said looking down at his feet.

Again the woman gave a small laugh then spoke again, "Vella, no. No Ron, I'm not a Vella. But I am flattered you'd think that I was one of them."

He looked over at Hermione who was smiling rather smugly and whispered into her ear, "Thanks allot, Hermione."

-=(^)=-

She was flattered, but she knew she was going to have to have in class and it was going to be hard for him to face her, she knew. Embarrassment did funny things to teenage boys. She found it funny that anyone would think her to be a Vella, but then she did have that effect on quite a few men. She was going to have to tell Remus to night. He would get a kick out of that she knew.

For the rest of the train ride, the red haired boy kept his gaze very discernablely off of her.

Midway to Hogwarts a boy, which the others called Malfoy, came to their cabin, but left when saw the two Professors. Two other boys followed him and Naria wondered absent-mindedly whether they were Slytherins. She had known their type, but she also recognized their names. She did not care if their fathers had been officially cleared, they had been guilty. She had known it then and Harry's story only fueled this view. They were the type that was clean as a whistle when a Professor was around, but when they weren't. well that was a completely different story. She would put good money on the fact that these boys would be well versed with all manor of curses, they were the future generation of Death Eaters, that is if they were allowed to become so.

Around five the woman who brought the cart around for lunch and the like did her final rounds. The three brought a stack of Caldron Cakes and some assorted sweets. She eyed them as a mother eyes her children when they were doing something they really ought not do.

"Don't you worry about running your appetite?" she asked quietly after she ordered herself a small stack of Caldron Cakes and two pumpkin juices.

"No," Ron and Harry answered in unison as they began eating. Hermione was now reflecting a look of motherly disappointment.

"Oh, I forgot your growing boys," she said with a small, knowing smile.

Ron again looked exceedingly embarrassed and once again refused to meet her gaze.

Naria however had her thoughts on other things. It had been nearly twenty- four hours since Lupin had eaten and he would need his strength. She gently nudged him quite a few times before he awoke with a start.

-=(^)=-

Shaken out of sleep and still quite groggy, he surveyed his surroundings and the people he shared them with. He recognized the three youthful faces that sat across from him and smiled inwardly. Of course who else would he end up sharing a cabin with?

"Afternoon, Professor," the three chimed. The smile that was reflecting on his inside soon found its place in reality.

"Good day, Harry.Hermione.Ron," he said as he looked at each of them. He silently hoped the stem of questions that usually met him when this gang was around would not be so vigorous. Not today at least. He was still tired from his transformation. Then he focused his gave upon his fiancé with a small smile. "Yes?"

"Caldron Cakes." It was more of a demand rather than a question and he knew the voice she had used meant not to question what she said, even though it was filled with its normal pleasantness. He took the few cakes she offered and one of the pumpkin juices she had gotten for him and ate.

It felt good to have something in his stomach again. He had felt drained and now he felt the energy returning to his veins and with every bite he felt better, more alive.

As he ate he also noticed something. Ron seemed to keep his eyes very intently from Naria's, but then they would dart back when he thought no one was looking. Suppressing a chuckle he cracked the faintest smile. He was going to have to ask what had happened latter tonight.

-=(^)=-

As the train came to a stop at the Hogsmeade station, the students began to detrain, leaving the train full of their belongings, and piled into horseless carriages that began taking of for the castle. She watched the first years and their looks of fear as the followed Hagrid and silently she remembered her first day and how nervous meeting that man had been and how nervous she had been until she learned the truth about the way people were sorted into there houses.

As she and Lupin piled into the carriage they would only share among themselves she sat expectedly waiting for a glimpse of Hogwarts for the first time in years. The castle was as she remembered it, ever imposing.

A smile spread across her face at the idea of returning to this place. The last time she had taken such a ride it had been her last day as a Seventh- year. Now she was a teacher, who would have thought.

As she climbed the stairs that lead to the main entrance, Professor McGonagall met them. Her normally severe look had been swapped with a smile. "Professors welcome back. You know the drill I trust, Remus?"

"Yes. Yes. Yes. We wait for Dumbledore to introduce us in his normal introduction speech," Lupin answered.

"Right. Well it's always great to have students return. Maybe you'll prove the Dark Arts position is not jinxed this year," she said with a knowing twinkle in her eye. "Well, must be off. Need to go frighten some more first years into a nervous twitter," she said this time giving Naria a knowing look.

They entered the entrance hall and Naria paused for a moment, surveying the once familiar amidst the sea of students entering the Great Hall for the Feast. Their young faces were full of curiosity and wonder. There minds, millions of miles away from the here and now, that Naria could wistfully remember.

After a quick reacquaintance with her old stomping ground she followed Remus back to the Staff room where they placed their cloaks. She straightened her clothing that had gotten a tad crumbled from the train ride and waited as she heard the excited first years enter the hall, probably in awe of what was to follow.

This place was filled with memories for her. Most happy, but like all places it also had its share of unhappy and disappointing memories. At this particular moment she could only see the good of the situation, the light. At this particular moment she was happy to be back and to be back with the man she loved and was going to marry.

It was like being a kid again. She saw the place in a whole new light. No longer was she Auror Sojair who had seen so many horrible things in the process of doing her job, things that caused her to wake up in the middle of the night with a start. Rather she was the girl Professor McGonagall had berated for turning the Professor's desk into a pixy that seemed to enjoy biting on the first day of class.

"Miss Sojair turn it back this instant," Professor McGonagall said as the pixy went to bite yet another student, yet another Slytherin.

Naria looked at the Professor through fits of giggles, along with the rest of the Gryffindor first years, but made no move to stop the pixy.

"Detention, Miss Sojair," the Professor had said after she had ended all of Naria's fun. The desk was back to normal and the Slytherin that was bit was at that moment walking to the Infirmary. "Now then, can anyone else show me an example of Transfiguration? A little less.live one, perhaps."

She had gotten detention with Filch and had not done something of that kind for about a week just to avoid ending up in that horrible mans office with those chains hanging from the ceiling. Silently at that thought, she wondered if Filch was still here. She could remember the man as well as his constant war against students and every happy impulse they had had. She knew the man to be squib and that was part of the reason he hated students so much. He had probably never gotten the chance to play the games the other students did, nor have the happy childhood they had. No, Filch seemed like the type of man who had never had a happy childhood. He had probably been punished or at least less loved if he had had siblings because of his condition and Naria knew that was enough to damage anyone. At the same moment, she also thought he was a bit more mean and menacing than was due and his cat. well his cat had no excuse. Evil beast, always looking to do the grunt work for its master.

"Come on Naria. What are you thinking about?" came Remus's voice through her walk down memory lane.

"Nothing important. Just remembrances of my time here, that's all," she answered him quietly. He looked tired as ever, but at the same moment life glinted with in his eyes, an unquenchable fire that showed his mischievous side even if he generally refused to let it out of his shell.

Remus was generally a guarded individual when it came to emotion. He generally shied away from emotional outbursts and Naria knew why. He feared them, he feared "the Wolf" and he feared showing "the Wolf." She knew that it was with him all of the time just far subdued when he was in human form. She knew what Remus feared most of all was a lose of control, the lose of control he had once a month at the full moon. That was the reason the boggart turned into the moon when it saw him.

That being said, Naria had gotten through some of this mans many walls. It was a considerable feat for Remus just to believe he deserved to be loved and Naria had finally gotten him to believe that. Originally, he had been so drawn back, afraid of what would happen if he let himself fall. He had been afraid of hurting her and afraid of the look in her eye that he was sure to find when she learned the truth. But Naria had always known the truth about him. She had known the fact after one month and she had not pitied him. No she felt a bit saddened that something would happen to such a good man, but it was not pity. Nor did she hate him. She was not revolted like others often were by his condition. After that first step he had taken, he began to rethink some of his aspects of his self-loathing and began to see that some of them were unfounded and as he began to see the truth he began to see how much people really cared for him, how much she really cared for him.

Naria had refused to let him push her away. Tire as hard as he might in the beginning, she simply was not going to buy his stories. No, she had seen into him and she had seen the truth. She had seen how he cared for her and she had seen that was the reason he felt so afraid to let her in.

"Place is full of them isn't it?" he asked her.

"Uh-hu," she answered with a nod. "I was remembering my first day of classes here. I turned Professor McGonagall's desk onto a biting pixy that seemed to enjoy the taste of Slytherin blood," she continued with a mischievous smirk playing across her face.

"It's to bad we weren't in the same year. I bet you could have had some fun with the Marauders."

"But then Sirius wouldn't have set of the dung bombs in the girls dorms the first day of his second year."

"I'm not so certain about that, he did always enjoy playing boyish tricks on girls."

"And you didn't?" Naria said doubtfully with a bit of mirth still entangling her every word.

"No, no, no," he said sarcastically

"I bet you were always the word of reason," she said smirking again at him.

"Always," he said the same smirk crossing his face as well. "I think the sorting is nearly finished. We should probably make our way."

"To bad we missed the sorting this year. It was always my favorite part of the Feast."

"Save your own sorting," he said quietly.

"The hat took so long. I sat there for nearly two minutes with it on my head. It kept threatening to send me to Slytherin."

"You know Harry had a similar experience," Remus said rather seriously to her as they made there way to the entrance of the Great Hall.

"No, but it makes since. When Voldemort used that dreaded curse on him it makes sense that part of Voldemort would be transferred to Harry. He was the heir of Slytherin and now Harry has some that man's traits," Naria said quietly.

"Why do you think it kept trying to put you in Slytherin?"

"I wasn't hiding my mischievous side and I do enjoy power, just a tad. I've had to be careful in my job because of that predisposition. A little flaw like that is all Voldemort has ever needed to change the best of men," Naria answered in a knowing voice.

"I can't really see you as a Slytherin nor a Death Eater," he said a little nervously.

"You remember when I was Head Girl, the year before Lilly?"

"Yes."

"I enjoyed power then. it was my first real taste," she said in a voice that was barely above a whisper. "But then the key to not being turned is to realize you have those traits and to coin a term Mad Eye Moody often used.Constant Vigilance," she said, miming the man's voice in the last part of the statement. "Once we realize we have these traits it becomes harder to be subverted using that trait."

"Yes. That does seem to be the case, now doesn't it? I think that little piece of wisdom I shall pass on to my classes. You know, they should have made you a Ravenclaw," he said, trying to lighten the serious nature of their conversation.

"Posh. Me, a Ravenclaw? Ha."

"You've always been exceedingly smart."

"Yes, but Ravenclaws seem to be rather staunch to keeping the rules and I never was."

"The only house I can't real ever see you being placed, no matter the circumstances, is Hufflepuff."

"And I'm a bit glad of that."

"Don't be so quick to judge them. They have a synergy most of the houses don't have and tackle problems using each member of their groups personal strengths to their fullest. I was quiet surprised by them my first year here," he said chiding her a bit.

"I remember their synergy and that was probably one of their best traits.And I know I shouldn't keep up the old school prejudices," she continued looking at him raise his eyebrows.

Just as she finished speaking, they heard Dumbledore begin his speech.

"Welcome. Welcome. Welcome. It's a new year at Hogwarts. Hopefully your heads aren't to empty from summer and hopefully we can refill them. That being said I would like to introduce two new, or at least on of them is new, professors. Maybe this year we can put an end to the rumor of the Defense Against the Dark Arts position being jinxed." At that the students began to laugh and the Dumbledore began again, "I'm certain most of you will remember him, Professor Lupin."

At that Remus entered the hall and was met by loud cheers, loudest from the Gryffindor side and surprisingly quiet from the Slytherin side.

Dumbledore continued on with his speech, "Next, Professor Vector recently left us and so I would like to introduce your new Spells teacher, Professor Sojair."

At the beckoning of her name another cheer passed through the crowd. She knew her name was reasonably well known from her job in the Ministry and was not completely surprised. Nor was she surprised by the fact that the Slytherins were a bit quieter. She had been responsible for a great number of their parents being charged with being a Voldemort supporter and she knew that an Auror made few friends among their kind.

Dumbledore continued on after the applause died down and she had taken her seat next to Remus, "Now then, the caretaker Filch would like me to inform you that as normal the forest is of limits. This is mainly for first years to hear, but that being said a few certain older students would do to remember that as well." Naria noticed as Dumbledore looked at the Weasley twins, now in their seventh year. Then his gaze fell upon Potter and his friends. Naria could remember a few expeditions into that wood and could remember that none had boded well for her, but that didn't mean they weren't fun.

"Quidditch trials will be held at the usual time and as usual if you are interested contact Madam Hooch. Also, the list of items that are band from the castle now includes acid pops due to an unfortunate accident last year. If you wish to view the list I am asked to remind you it is housed in Filch's office.

"I think that's all the mindless droning for now. Let the feast begin," at that the golden plates filled with all kinds of foods. At that moment the room became a life with chatter and laughter.

As the feast began, Naria marveled at how well she could see the students from this vantage point. A lot of the students in her year had theorized that the High Table probably had hawks view of all the students, hence the reason people were so often caught in their mischief and they had been right. Both Professors McGonagall and Snape had gotten up once or twice from their seats to discipline people from their houses. Naria noticed how mostly the Weasley twins bore the brunt of McGonagall's wrath. When Snape returned to his seat he gave a disgusted little look at Remus and then turned the conversation to a sore issue. "Will I be making your potion this year?" Snape seethed at Remus, reminding everyone at the table that he was not normal.

Dumbledore however deflected this question, "No, Severus. Naria has some talent with potions brewing."

"Have you any experience brewing this particular potion," Snape said to her in his menacing whisper.

"Yes, Professor Snape," she answered meeting his glare with an even stare until Snape broke it and began glaring at Remus again. Naria silently fingered her ring under the table to be certain it was there.

"Just as long as he gets his potion."

Naria noticed how Remus reddened a bit under Snape's glare, but he
refused to be
brought down to the Potion Master's level. Naria was glad that at
least some one at this table was an adult.

After that little bit of posturing, the conversation turned to more pleasant matters. Minerva then asked a question she had not be quite prepared for, "Have you set a date?"

"Excuse me?" she said calmly to be certain that McGonagall was asking what she thought she was asking.

"Have you set a wedding date?" the other woman rephrased the question as to be certain there was no misunderstanding.

"Um. no," Naria answered quietly.

"We didn't think it wise to set a date considering the current situation," clarified Remus smiling at Naria softly.

At that Snape's jaw completely dropped. He stood there with a gaping mouth until he recovered himself, a look of shock still on his face. Naria got a perverse pleasure at shocking the man's sensibilities. She knew it was childish, but that really was not a deterrent.

"A wise choice," the woman said to Naria with a smile.

Once again she fingered her ring for comfort. She did not like being the center of attention at this particular moment, especially since Professor Snape's look at changed to a cold and disgusted glare, no longer focused at Remus, but at her. Naria broke the man's stare, rather on edge and fingered the ring yet a third time. It was becoming a security blanket at this meal. She silently hoped that that would not be the case in the future. Under the table she felt a hand grasp hers. She immediately recognized the hand and began to calm down at Remus's touch and then returned his smile.

-=(^)=-

"I wish he didn't do things like that," Naria stated as they walked down to the Staff Wing.

"Just ignore Snape. Who cares what he thinks?" Remus advised. "Sayseame Openais," he said to the Suit of Armor, the first step out of many that would allow them to gain access to this well guarded area.

"It's not that I care what that git thinks, it's that I don't like being glared out all evening. Although, I do have to admit I enjoyed the look that spread across his face when Minerva asked about us," she said as she rapped once on the large door that allowed entrance to all of the separate teachers chambers. Idly Naria thought it would be exceedingly fitting if Snape's chambers were in his Dungeons.

"I have to admit, his glare does get tiring." he said, as they walked to the end of the corridor and stopped at where the door was. Again Remus preformed the Sayseame Openais Charm.

Naria surveyed their set of rooms. It was even larger than their little Cornish cottage. Naria was oddly reminded of her dorm when she was a girl in Gryffindor. The four-poster they would share was even covered with the old red velvet. Naria knew she should unpack, but didn't feel up to it. Nay, dinner had made her quite tired, but she still wanted to tell Remus about Ron.

As she pleated her hair into a braid and got dressed in her sleep things Naria came out of the bathroom to find Remus already comfortable waiting in bed for her. As she walked over and got into the bed she spoke, "You'll never guess what one of the students thought I was."

"What?" he asked with some interest.

"A Vella. Can you imagine?" Naria said.

A knowing smile spread across Remus's youthful face, even with his graying hair, "Ron?"

"Yeah. How did you know?"

"Hermione writes to me on occasion and told me about his particular fancy for them. Plus Ron was looking at you when he thought no one was looking and then looking away abruptly. I personally can see the resemblance," he said with a smile.

"Ah, did you once think the same?" she asked for earlier his voice had hinted at something that went unsaid in the last part of the statement.

"Yes, when I first saw you and looked at your lengths of hair I thought you could possibly be part Vella."

"Who is she?" Remus asked quietly to a friend at the Ministry. "She" had to be the most beautiful woman he had seen in a long time. She had poise and grace about her that was exceedingly attractive. Also her lengths of silky golden blond hair created such a light aura around her.

"That is Auror Sojair, she's marked to be a candidate for the Minister's position. She was one of the top Aurors during You-Know-Who's rise. Now she leads the Ministry of Magical Law Enforcement. Basically, she's the lead Auror. With Mad Eye Moody's retirement they were hard pressed to find some one. Naria, over there, didn't have all the credentials the position required, but she had experience and good recommendations, so she was the logical choice. She certainly has proved herself though. She has personally been responsible for most of the captures of the Death Eaters," the man said.

"Is. is she part Vella?"

"I don't believe so. But I can see the resemblance."

Right as the man finished speaking, Naria turned to him. Their gaze locked and he felt electricity through out him. It was one of the most enjoyable experiences and immediately he wanted to get to know this woman, and then he remembered "the Wolf" and he held off. He held off as he always held off.

He then thought to the night he had asked her to marry him while he was on his little trip through memory lane.

This was falling, but for the first time in his life, Remus allowed everything to come rushing forward. Joy, fear, giddiness, and bitter sorrow all seemed to rush through him at once. There was still the nagging fear that this was wrong, that if he finally let go, and let her in, that he would hurt her. He couldn't bear that. But that was a maybe, and he knew, he absolutely knew, that walking away from her would hurt her, more than anything else he could ever do.

He stared at her intently. The back of his throat burned and the dull ache he had felt in his chest all day had suddenly turned into a sharp pain. Some detached part of his mind thought 'how odd - it really does seem to feel like there is a hole in you'. Even wives' tales and proverbs had their basis in truth. He would not be the first, nor the last, to feel like this. He needed her so much it hurt. Keeping her away from him was too much.

He looked at her uncertain for the first time in his life. He did not know how to say what he had wanted to say for some time now. Long ago, okay maybe not that long ago, but certainly not recently he had made the first step towards letting her into his heart and now he was going to take an even longer leap of faith. He was going to leap and either he'd fall or fly. He was going to ask her to spend the rest of her live, hopefully, with him. He was going to ask her hand in marriage.

She watched him quietly, never changing her gaze, never changing her expression. Her face was closed, and still. She regarded him will such studied composure, but he saw in her eyes that the face was not showing anything of the struggle playing in her mind. Why am I doing this, he thought. Why are we doing this?

Her pain was as real as his, her fear was as deep, and it just came from a different source. Her fear was that he would leave, that he would decide she was not worth the risk, but she was worth risking everything for. A risk he should have taken long ago.

His breath came as a painful shudder, but he decided that she was really worth this risk, the largest risk he thought could be made, to place his heart in another's hands and hope for the best.

As he stared at her he made the decisive move. Kneeling before her he took one last breath before the plunge. He took her hand in his. Not only for to signify the emotional significance of his next statement but also to make certain she was really there, that he wasn't dreaming. With that little reassurance he felt his heart began to beat a tad slower. Meeting her gaze he spoke in a voice barely above a whisper, "Naria, for the longest time I have been afraid to love and afraid to be loved. You. you have shown me not only that I can love but also that I am disserved of being loved. When I'm with you I feel my heart lighten, my worries fade away. When we are apart I feel like with you goes a part of me. What I'm trying to say." he paused and removed the ring case from his pocket, "a bit poorly I'm afraid to say, is that. is that I want to spend the rest of my days with you and no other. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

Tears were streaming down her face, now he began to doubt. The silence, the pregnant atmosphere was killing him. He was terrified. All the old fears came screaming at him. Silently he wondered, "Oh God, this is it. This will end it all. It's been so nice pretending, so safe, so sweet. I couldn't help pretending it could be real. Just for a little while, I needed to steal some sense of loving another person and being loved. It just felt so nice."

Finally, just as he felt he would die, she spoke, "Remus. I.I.Of course I'll marry her."

At that statement he felt like he was floating on air, like his entire soul had been lightened. He wrapped her in his arms as if he would never let her go. He buried a hand in her long beautiful hair and they stood like that for a few minutes. "That is if I'm still breathing," she said with her head against his chest. Embarrassed he pulled her away allowing her to breath again. A smile spread across her face. He took her hand in his again. Removing the ring from its little box and placed it one her slender and beautiful finger

That night they spent in each other's arms in silence. Their silences had always been as rich as their conversations. In the silence he came to the realization of how right this was and he no longer had a reason to fear this. He took her face in his hands and he kissed her passionately, fully experiencing the moment.

He looked over at the woman next to him. She had already fallen asleep next to him. A small smile spread across his face as he looked at her sleeping form. He felt oddly at peace with her next to him, this peace soon fell into the peace of dreams and sleep.

And with that September First came to an ending.