A/N: Hiding out and eating rats all the time isn't easy on Sirius, and it's not long before he starts composing songs and singing them to his imaginary friends.

A Certain Individual: And now Mr. Sirius Black will sing for you: I Eat Rats.

Sirius: Ahem. I thank you all for coming here, you are such a wonderful audience. Take it away Eric the orchestra leader!

Imaginary Eric: And-a-one-a-two-a-one-two-three-four

Sirius:

Hiding out is not much fun
And neither's being on the run
The only thing that gets me through
Is thoughts of a big rat stew

Mmmmmm Rats!
I love eating rats!
Just can't get enough of them rats!
Rats are all the fun in life and rats is what I eats!

Roasted rats, barbecued rats,
And rats deep fried in butter
Deliciously addictive rats
Food? There is no other!

Slimy, wriggling, long rats tails
For me nothing is sweeter
I hunt rats with my butcher knife-
OH GOD! DID I JUST EAT PETER?!?!?!?!?

Mmmmmm Rats!
I love eating rats!
Jus tcan't get enough of them rats!
It's what's for dinner!

It's not easy having a secret you're too scared to share
And whenever I send Harry letters while hiding in my lair
I ask for food and other things so I can have my sup
Little does he realise I use it to fatten the rats up!!! HAHAHAHA!!!

Mmmmmm Rats!
I love eating rats!
Just can't get enough of them rats!
Maybe I'm just a tad obsessed

Mmmmmm Rats!
I love eating rats!
Just can't get enough of them rats!
Someone please kill me now!

A Certain Individual: And only 2 Monty Python references! Thank you Sirius.

Sirius: [looks up from a half-eaten rat in his hands] What?

A Certain Individual: Let's hear another round of reviews for Sirius Black ladies and gentleman!