[[Note: CONTAINS SPOILERS!!! I do NOT own square or any of the final
fantasy characters, names and places have been kept the same (I still don't
own them) and overall I don't think I own any people in this story. except
for Jimi the camera man.
Jimi, we love you. (Bwwwaahaha! Your soul is mine!) And voice-over guy. He
lives in my closet! *proud grin*]]
[Lights flash on, wide screen shot of stage where comfit-able chairs and desk are sitting.]
[Swings around to shot of sign: 'Good Morning Gaia']
[Close up shot on presenters]
Kuja: *smiles* Hello and GOOG MORNING GAIA!, I'm Kuja and this is my beautiful co-host: the wonderful Ultimecia!
Ultimecia: Thank you Kuja, it's a pleasure to be here.
Kuja: we have a lot to get through today so shall we make a start?
Ultimecia: *nods* Of Kource!
Kuja: Righty-ho then, first up we have a little game I like to call 'get that date!'
Our 3 contestants sit in little cramped boxes and answer questions for our lovely lady guest. Then if she find one she likes we send them off on a nice little holiday. Maybe to fetch something.
Ultimecia: Oh Kuja, You make it sound so appealing!
Kuja: *looks sideways at Ultimecia* .... Yes. Well. Right.
Uhh. HERE COME THE CONTESTANTS!
[Audience clap loudly as Sephiroth, Quina and Zell walk on stage]
[The contestants smile and wave, take a number and squish into the three boxes]
Kuja: Alrighty men, sound check!, when I call your number say your name into the mic!
Ultimecia: Kontestant one!
Sephiroth: Number one. As always. *grin*
Kuja: Contestant two!
Quina: No food in here! [Shuffle noises are heard]
Kuja: .. Okay then, that must be the darling Quina.
Ultimecia: Kontestant three!
[Silence is heard]
Ultimecia: Kontestant three state your name!
Zell: ... Is that.. Ultimecia?! *Yelp*
Ultimecia: *sweatdrop* Kontestant three's mikrophone works.
Kuja: ALL RIGHT!, now for the lady!!!
[Audience cheers loudly as Selphie Tilmitt walks on stage]
Selphie: *waves at audience then at Kuja and Ultimecia*
Kuja: now dear, if you just step into the box.
Selphie: *smiles and steps into the box and sits down* okay, I'm ready!
Ultimecia: okay, you will find your questions to ask the *cough* lovely men on the table.
[Audience gasp as a table appears]
Ultimecia: *grins*
Kuja: *looks slightly annoyed* right. Let the game begin!!!
Selphie: Alright. Contestant one, what do you always carry around with you?
Sephiroth: . My mother.
Selphie: *nods* good. Same question to contestants two and three.
Quina: Fork. For frogs.
Zell: uhh.. My gloves. And my jacket. And my shorts. and hotdog wrappers of course!
Selphie: okay!, well, Contestants: what's your idea of a good time?
Sephiroth: trying to take over this puny world.
Quina: Frog hunting. I very good at it!
Zell: chillin', just hanging around eating 'dogs ya know. nothing too. dangerous.
Selphie: hehe, last question: if I choose you where would you want to go on our holiday?
Sephiroth: somewhere. alone.
Quina: where yum-yums are! Good yum-yums!
Zell: anywhere that isn't the future! Or the past! Or anywhere that involves magic and the possibility of not getting home!! Also, nowhere with Mexican food.
Kuja: sorry to cut it short guys, but the lady will now make her decision.
Selphie: *appears to be thinking hard* got it!
Ultimecia: well.?
Selphie: Contestant. two!!
Kuja: ...great. Now, we have other things to attend to Ulti, people are waiting.
Ultimecia: *raises an eyebrow and waves her hand, the contestants and Selphie vanish*
Kuja: alright. Sorry that took so long folks but now we have you caller's phone in with your problems!
Kuja: *hands Ultimecia a headset*
Kuja: Caller one, your on the air. what's your problem?
Caller one: w-well, I have this problem you see, I'm in love with two women.
One I want to be with but the other I'm deeply attracted to.
Kuja: well, this COULD be somewhat of a problem.
Caller one: yes, I know! The problem is.. The lady I'm attracted to. he already has a husband.
Kuja: ohh.
Caller one: .who is my principle!!
Kuja: ?!??! o.O*
Caller one: the thing is, we had this thing going on and we kinda slept toge-
Ultimecia: Seifer?
Caller one: AHHH!! WHO IS THIS?!
Ultimecia: it's me. *Sweatdrop* The great Ultimecia.
Caller one: @#%#^~@#%@#$%!!!
Kuja: Your not allowed to call the callers by name!!
Caller one: wait!!. Ulti, cant you just possess her again? MAKE HER LOVE ME!!
Ultimecia: *cough* .no. Anyways, it was you and me. not her. *cough* remember that night..
Caller one: You?! .....OHH ULTIMECIA!!! *Swoon*
Ultimecia: *sweatdrop* [close up on Ultimecia cutting Seifer off]
Kuja: Ultimecia!!
Ultimecia: What?, he left. ^__^"
Kuja: *sigh* next caller is... Terra!
Terra: Umm, hi. I'm calling about how men are jerks!
Kuja: .. Carry on. who makes you feel this way Terra?
Terra: .Loki. HE'S SUCH A JERK!!!!
Ultimecia: any. reason?
Terra: yeah, lots!, first of all he tells me he loves me then goes lusting after that little whore Celes! Then he----
Kuja: sorry folks, time for an add break!!
[Cut to adds/blackout]
[Fade in on a Moogle standing next to a mopey Moomba]
Moogle: are you getting the respect you deserve? Kupo!
Moomba: *shakes head sadly*
Moogle: are you getting pushed around and forced to -Kupo- do the dirty work?!
Moomba: *nods*
Moogle: then why not rebel?, Kupo! Start a revolution!, Kupo! Get up off your ass and get outta that prison cell!! KUPO-KUUUPPOO!!!
Moomba: *grins and squeaks* LAGUNA!! LAGUNA!!! *Raises paw/fist in the air and growls*
Moogle: *smiles* This add is in no way supported by D-District prison. In fact, Kupo, its quite against this add. ;D
[Big cheesy picture of Laguna in a 'thumbs up' pose flashes on screen]
Voice-over guy: Proudly brought to you by Esthar!
[Fade out]
[Fade in on Kuja lacing up his boots and Ultimecia sipping ginger-tea in front of the 'Good Morning Gaia' sign]
Kuja: Welcome back folks!
Ultimecia: Yes, Welkome. *sips tea*
Kuja: And now for your view pleasure we bring to you the story that awed the world. A story of love, freindship, womanisers, and marshmellows!!
Ultimecia: Any evil sorcerouses?
Kuja: Saddly no. No villians of any sort.
Ultimecia: *sigh* Ohh well, Kontinue.
Kuja: ..Right. Now I'd like you all to give our next guests a big hand. IRVINE KINEAS AND ZIDANE TRIBAL!!!!
[audience goes wild as Zidane and Irvine walk on stage bowing]
Kuja: *gestures at the chairs* Darlings, sit, sit!
[side shot of Irvine and Zidane siting down in chairs next to each other]
Kuja: so. when did all this happen?
Irvine: well, like, we just met one day. it didn't happen at first. we were going round, looking for babes. then I guess in the end, it just clicked, like, ya know?
Zidane: *nods*
Kuja: So, I hear you've both been through some tough times before and after the realationship. why don't you tell me about them?
Irvine: well, as you know, there was like, this thing with Ultimecia here.
Ultimecia: *smiles coldly over the teacup*
Irvine: ... yeah. *Cough* and then my realationship with Selph fell through and I had no one to turn to and. *he sniffs* .and Zidane was just there for me man, like, yeah, just there!
Zidane: *pats Irvine on the back* I was.
Kuja: And Zidane. you had problems too, after the fight with me and everything how did you cope?
Zidane: wait. how did you get out from there anyway?
Kuja: flushes red then carrys on light-heatedly* did you marry Garnet in the end?
Zidane: ..no,.really. arnt you ment to be dead?..
Kuja: *uncomfortable cough* and how exactly did you meet Irvy anyways?
Zidane: ....
Irvine: ..
Ultimecia: *Unconfortable scilence*.... yes, well. Sooo.Irvine, you were telling me earlyer that you were going to ask Zidane to marry you.. Hows that going for you?
Irvine: *turns pink*
Zidane: !!!!!!!!
Kuja: (phew)
Zidane: WHEN WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THIS IRVINE KINEAS??!! I TOLD YOU ABOUT THE GIL PROBLEMS AND GETTING A HOUSE AND SHIP AND EVERYONE STILL GIVING US THAT LOOK! *he hits Irvine hard over the head and knocks Irvines hat flying*
Irvine: *bursts into tears and runs off*
Zidane: Shit!, IRVY-POO! COME BACK HUN, I DIDN'T MEAN IT!!!
[wide shot of Zidane running offstage after Irvine]
Kuja: Wow. tad up-tight wee chap. *Chuckle*
Ultimecia: Stress. That's what I bet!
Kuja: *nods* ..if only I had got to him first. *mutters*
Ultimecia: what?
Kuja: *blushes* Ohh, nothing! I was just complaining about the false advertising about the marshmellows in that last story.
Ultimecia: ..
Ultimecia: Well. Whats next?
Kuja: what do you mean 'whats next?'?!
Ultimecia: its your show!!
Kuja: ohh!! So it is. Well, up next we have '30 seconds' with Nida.
[close up on Kuja pressing a switch and a screen pops up behind the chairs]
Kuja: well, this is our garden-cam. *Grins* From this we can play god.
Ultimecia: *perks up* really?
Kuja: Weeelll.. Almost. Watch.
[screen fuzzes for a second then a picture apears]
[close up on screen displaying the driving and Steering Quarters of Balamb Garden where Nida is driving with a sign around his neck]
Kuja: NIDA!, NIDA CAN YOU HEAR ME??!
[close up of Nida's startled face as he looks around]
Nida: w-who's there?
Kuja: Kuja, from the Good Morning Gaia show!
Nida: WOW, REALLY?!
Kuja: Of cource!, now Nida, will you be willing to spare 30 seconds?
Nida: Sure!!, but I still need to drive.
Kuja: that's fine, you just need to answer a few questions for me.
Nida: *grins* okay!
Ultimecia: Who's that kid?
Kuja: Well, the sign says 'Nida' so I suppose.. NIDA! WHATS WITH THE SIGN?!!!
Nida: ohh, its so people remember me!
Kuja: . right.
Nida: has the 30 seconds started yet?
Ultimecia: yes, I'm starting it now.
Kuja: okay Nida, question one: Where is your hometown?
Nida: Balamb, I lived next to Zell his whole life and he still doesn't know who I am! *Grin*
Kuja: *Chuckle* second question: How did you become driver for Balamb Garden?
Nida: ohh, when Squall became leader of Balamb Garden he appointed me the driver. I guess its cause he trusted me and new me so well.
Ultimecia: *stiffles a giggle*
Kuja: Question three!: Whats your favourite colour?
Nida: .. I'd have to say... Brown!
Kuja: Four: If you were to have any girl in the garden..
Nida: Quistus.
Kuja: WOW, that was quick!. any reason? *Wink*
Nida: *blush* ohh shush up kuja!
Kuja: But darling!. *winks and Giggles*
Ultimecia: Times almost up!
Kuja: okay, last question: If you were to take me out on a date somewhere.. where would you take me?
Nida: well, first we would go out to a play then I would drive you to Dollet to see the stars. we would sit near the tv tower and---
[wide shot as screen goes fuzzy]
Kuja: Nida?! NIDA!!!
Ultimecia: ohh dear, komunications lost. Poor Kuja! *she grins*
Kuja: *turns to her and growls* SHUT UP WITCH!
Ultimecia: aww, sulky Kuja! *pokes her tongue out*
Kuja: Ultimecia. Let me remind you who's show it is. I SHALL NOT STAND FOR SUCH THINGS COMING FROM MY CO-HOST!
Ultimecia: *shuts up and bites her lip*
Kuja: *grits teeth* now we have an add break.
[fade out]
[fade in on a small black mage sitting next to a waterfall]
Vivi: hi. Do you wish your life was like this?
[close up on waterfall for a few seconds]
Vivi: when in reality its like this.
[screen changes to the dollet battle sceen from ff8]
Vivi: *walks over to a small table containing bottles of pills* Pro-pills, happyness in a pill. Take two pro-pills twice daily and I garentey your life will feel more stressfree and you will feel less depressed and anxieous in one week.
Vivi: works for me! *big smile*
[close up on pills lable]
Voice-over guy: Don't take pills in conjunction with copious amounts of sugar, alcohol, drugs, other medication, bible camps, dangerous water or time-travel. If you miss a pill, take one as soon as you remember. If you overdose (take more then three pills a day) you are doomed. See doctor is problems/anxiety and paranoia pursist.
[fade out]
[fade in on Kuja and Ultimecia glearing at each other.]
Kuja: ...
Ultimecia: ....
Kuja: *sigh* Well, just say it, I know it was you Ulti.
Ultimecia: I'm telling you Kuja, I didn't slip tea in your boot!!
Kuja: THEN WHO THE HELL WAS IT??!!
Ultimecia: *shrugs* maybe you slipped?
Kuja: IN WHAT??! A TEA POOL?!!!!! .*
Ultimecia: *sigh* look, I don't know how you did it but I'm telling you: it. Wassnt. Me.
Kuja: *stands up* well fine. Im going to go get Jimi to dry clean them. *storms off*
Ultimecia: do what you want. *Sigh* looks like its my show now..
Ultimecia: ...
Ultimecia: weeeel. uhhh, what up on the nexty show eh?
....
Well, we have a interview with Ragtime Mouse; Eiko and Relm show off their artistic flair and Regent Cid chats to us--... me..i think..-about ruling a kingdom.
Ultimecia: *sweatdrop* well, uhh. That's all we have for today folks. Call again next morning for 'GOOD MORNING GAIA'!!!
[fade to black as Kuja runs on stage and chucks a boot at Ultimecia as she cackles with laughter]
[Credits:]
Show-host: Kuja Show co-host: Ultimecia Camera man: Jimi Noxtie Voice over: Voice Over Guy. Boot cleaner: Tina Wesseria Lights and sound: Amarant Coral. Tea lady: Edea Kramer Microphone check: Linda Swatterrox. Demonic kitten handler: Poor Mr Foley.
[thanks to:]
all the contestants and guests that apeared on the show. Jimmi Tina Mr Foley Amarant Ogolop control.
You, the reader.
[[look out for good morning gaia-2, the story-hopefully, somewhat-continues and uhh, I write. Stuff. Also Jimi and voice over guy return along with all the other random people I made up. ^__^ See you then, then. Then. Thank you for reading, review if you think its worth your time]]
[Lights flash on, wide screen shot of stage where comfit-able chairs and desk are sitting.]
[Swings around to shot of sign: 'Good Morning Gaia']
[Close up shot on presenters]
Kuja: *smiles* Hello and GOOG MORNING GAIA!, I'm Kuja and this is my beautiful co-host: the wonderful Ultimecia!
Ultimecia: Thank you Kuja, it's a pleasure to be here.
Kuja: we have a lot to get through today so shall we make a start?
Ultimecia: *nods* Of Kource!
Kuja: Righty-ho then, first up we have a little game I like to call 'get that date!'
Our 3 contestants sit in little cramped boxes and answer questions for our lovely lady guest. Then if she find one she likes we send them off on a nice little holiday. Maybe to fetch something.
Ultimecia: Oh Kuja, You make it sound so appealing!
Kuja: *looks sideways at Ultimecia* .... Yes. Well. Right.
Uhh. HERE COME THE CONTESTANTS!
[Audience clap loudly as Sephiroth, Quina and Zell walk on stage]
[The contestants smile and wave, take a number and squish into the three boxes]
Kuja: Alrighty men, sound check!, when I call your number say your name into the mic!
Ultimecia: Kontestant one!
Sephiroth: Number one. As always. *grin*
Kuja: Contestant two!
Quina: No food in here! [Shuffle noises are heard]
Kuja: .. Okay then, that must be the darling Quina.
Ultimecia: Kontestant three!
[Silence is heard]
Ultimecia: Kontestant three state your name!
Zell: ... Is that.. Ultimecia?! *Yelp*
Ultimecia: *sweatdrop* Kontestant three's mikrophone works.
Kuja: ALL RIGHT!, now for the lady!!!
[Audience cheers loudly as Selphie Tilmitt walks on stage]
Selphie: *waves at audience then at Kuja and Ultimecia*
Kuja: now dear, if you just step into the box.
Selphie: *smiles and steps into the box and sits down* okay, I'm ready!
Ultimecia: okay, you will find your questions to ask the *cough* lovely men on the table.
[Audience gasp as a table appears]
Ultimecia: *grins*
Kuja: *looks slightly annoyed* right. Let the game begin!!!
Selphie: Alright. Contestant one, what do you always carry around with you?
Sephiroth: . My mother.
Selphie: *nods* good. Same question to contestants two and three.
Quina: Fork. For frogs.
Zell: uhh.. My gloves. And my jacket. And my shorts. and hotdog wrappers of course!
Selphie: okay!, well, Contestants: what's your idea of a good time?
Sephiroth: trying to take over this puny world.
Quina: Frog hunting. I very good at it!
Zell: chillin', just hanging around eating 'dogs ya know. nothing too. dangerous.
Selphie: hehe, last question: if I choose you where would you want to go on our holiday?
Sephiroth: somewhere. alone.
Quina: where yum-yums are! Good yum-yums!
Zell: anywhere that isn't the future! Or the past! Or anywhere that involves magic and the possibility of not getting home!! Also, nowhere with Mexican food.
Kuja: sorry to cut it short guys, but the lady will now make her decision.
Selphie: *appears to be thinking hard* got it!
Ultimecia: well.?
Selphie: Contestant. two!!
Kuja: ...great. Now, we have other things to attend to Ulti, people are waiting.
Ultimecia: *raises an eyebrow and waves her hand, the contestants and Selphie vanish*
Kuja: alright. Sorry that took so long folks but now we have you caller's phone in with your problems!
Kuja: *hands Ultimecia a headset*
Kuja: Caller one, your on the air. what's your problem?
Caller one: w-well, I have this problem you see, I'm in love with two women.
One I want to be with but the other I'm deeply attracted to.
Kuja: well, this COULD be somewhat of a problem.
Caller one: yes, I know! The problem is.. The lady I'm attracted to. he already has a husband.
Kuja: ohh.
Caller one: .who is my principle!!
Kuja: ?!??! o.O*
Caller one: the thing is, we had this thing going on and we kinda slept toge-
Ultimecia: Seifer?
Caller one: AHHH!! WHO IS THIS?!
Ultimecia: it's me. *Sweatdrop* The great Ultimecia.
Caller one: @#%#^~@#%@#$%!!!
Kuja: Your not allowed to call the callers by name!!
Caller one: wait!!. Ulti, cant you just possess her again? MAKE HER LOVE ME!!
Ultimecia: *cough* .no. Anyways, it was you and me. not her. *cough* remember that night..
Caller one: You?! .....OHH ULTIMECIA!!! *Swoon*
Ultimecia: *sweatdrop* [close up on Ultimecia cutting Seifer off]
Kuja: Ultimecia!!
Ultimecia: What?, he left. ^__^"
Kuja: *sigh* next caller is... Terra!
Terra: Umm, hi. I'm calling about how men are jerks!
Kuja: .. Carry on. who makes you feel this way Terra?
Terra: .Loki. HE'S SUCH A JERK!!!!
Ultimecia: any. reason?
Terra: yeah, lots!, first of all he tells me he loves me then goes lusting after that little whore Celes! Then he----
Kuja: sorry folks, time for an add break!!
[Cut to adds/blackout]
[Fade in on a Moogle standing next to a mopey Moomba]
Moogle: are you getting the respect you deserve? Kupo!
Moomba: *shakes head sadly*
Moogle: are you getting pushed around and forced to -Kupo- do the dirty work?!
Moomba: *nods*
Moogle: then why not rebel?, Kupo! Start a revolution!, Kupo! Get up off your ass and get outta that prison cell!! KUPO-KUUUPPOO!!!
Moomba: *grins and squeaks* LAGUNA!! LAGUNA!!! *Raises paw/fist in the air and growls*
Moogle: *smiles* This add is in no way supported by D-District prison. In fact, Kupo, its quite against this add. ;D
[Big cheesy picture of Laguna in a 'thumbs up' pose flashes on screen]
Voice-over guy: Proudly brought to you by Esthar!
[Fade out]
[Fade in on Kuja lacing up his boots and Ultimecia sipping ginger-tea in front of the 'Good Morning Gaia' sign]
Kuja: Welcome back folks!
Ultimecia: Yes, Welkome. *sips tea*
Kuja: And now for your view pleasure we bring to you the story that awed the world. A story of love, freindship, womanisers, and marshmellows!!
Ultimecia: Any evil sorcerouses?
Kuja: Saddly no. No villians of any sort.
Ultimecia: *sigh* Ohh well, Kontinue.
Kuja: ..Right. Now I'd like you all to give our next guests a big hand. IRVINE KINEAS AND ZIDANE TRIBAL!!!!
[audience goes wild as Zidane and Irvine walk on stage bowing]
Kuja: *gestures at the chairs* Darlings, sit, sit!
[side shot of Irvine and Zidane siting down in chairs next to each other]
Kuja: so. when did all this happen?
Irvine: well, like, we just met one day. it didn't happen at first. we were going round, looking for babes. then I guess in the end, it just clicked, like, ya know?
Zidane: *nods*
Kuja: So, I hear you've both been through some tough times before and after the realationship. why don't you tell me about them?
Irvine: well, as you know, there was like, this thing with Ultimecia here.
Ultimecia: *smiles coldly over the teacup*
Irvine: ... yeah. *Cough* and then my realationship with Selph fell through and I had no one to turn to and. *he sniffs* .and Zidane was just there for me man, like, yeah, just there!
Zidane: *pats Irvine on the back* I was.
Kuja: And Zidane. you had problems too, after the fight with me and everything how did you cope?
Zidane: wait. how did you get out from there anyway?
Kuja: flushes red then carrys on light-heatedly* did you marry Garnet in the end?
Zidane: ..no,.really. arnt you ment to be dead?..
Kuja: *uncomfortable cough* and how exactly did you meet Irvy anyways?
Zidane: ....
Irvine: ..
Ultimecia: *Unconfortable scilence*.... yes, well. Sooo.Irvine, you were telling me earlyer that you were going to ask Zidane to marry you.. Hows that going for you?
Irvine: *turns pink*
Zidane: !!!!!!!!
Kuja: (phew)
Zidane: WHEN WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THIS IRVINE KINEAS??!! I TOLD YOU ABOUT THE GIL PROBLEMS AND GETTING A HOUSE AND SHIP AND EVERYONE STILL GIVING US THAT LOOK! *he hits Irvine hard over the head and knocks Irvines hat flying*
Irvine: *bursts into tears and runs off*
Zidane: Shit!, IRVY-POO! COME BACK HUN, I DIDN'T MEAN IT!!!
[wide shot of Zidane running offstage after Irvine]
Kuja: Wow. tad up-tight wee chap. *Chuckle*
Ultimecia: Stress. That's what I bet!
Kuja: *nods* ..if only I had got to him first. *mutters*
Ultimecia: what?
Kuja: *blushes* Ohh, nothing! I was just complaining about the false advertising about the marshmellows in that last story.
Ultimecia: ..
Ultimecia: Well. Whats next?
Kuja: what do you mean 'whats next?'?!
Ultimecia: its your show!!
Kuja: ohh!! So it is. Well, up next we have '30 seconds' with Nida.
[close up on Kuja pressing a switch and a screen pops up behind the chairs]
Kuja: well, this is our garden-cam. *Grins* From this we can play god.
Ultimecia: *perks up* really?
Kuja: Weeelll.. Almost. Watch.
[screen fuzzes for a second then a picture apears]
[close up on screen displaying the driving and Steering Quarters of Balamb Garden where Nida is driving with a sign around his neck]
Kuja: NIDA!, NIDA CAN YOU HEAR ME??!
[close up of Nida's startled face as he looks around]
Nida: w-who's there?
Kuja: Kuja, from the Good Morning Gaia show!
Nida: WOW, REALLY?!
Kuja: Of cource!, now Nida, will you be willing to spare 30 seconds?
Nida: Sure!!, but I still need to drive.
Kuja: that's fine, you just need to answer a few questions for me.
Nida: *grins* okay!
Ultimecia: Who's that kid?
Kuja: Well, the sign says 'Nida' so I suppose.. NIDA! WHATS WITH THE SIGN?!!!
Nida: ohh, its so people remember me!
Kuja: . right.
Nida: has the 30 seconds started yet?
Ultimecia: yes, I'm starting it now.
Kuja: okay Nida, question one: Where is your hometown?
Nida: Balamb, I lived next to Zell his whole life and he still doesn't know who I am! *Grin*
Kuja: *Chuckle* second question: How did you become driver for Balamb Garden?
Nida: ohh, when Squall became leader of Balamb Garden he appointed me the driver. I guess its cause he trusted me and new me so well.
Ultimecia: *stiffles a giggle*
Kuja: Question three!: Whats your favourite colour?
Nida: .. I'd have to say... Brown!
Kuja: Four: If you were to have any girl in the garden..
Nida: Quistus.
Kuja: WOW, that was quick!. any reason? *Wink*
Nida: *blush* ohh shush up kuja!
Kuja: But darling!. *winks and Giggles*
Ultimecia: Times almost up!
Kuja: okay, last question: If you were to take me out on a date somewhere.. where would you take me?
Nida: well, first we would go out to a play then I would drive you to Dollet to see the stars. we would sit near the tv tower and---
[wide shot as screen goes fuzzy]
Kuja: Nida?! NIDA!!!
Ultimecia: ohh dear, komunications lost. Poor Kuja! *she grins*
Kuja: *turns to her and growls* SHUT UP WITCH!
Ultimecia: aww, sulky Kuja! *pokes her tongue out*
Kuja: Ultimecia. Let me remind you who's show it is. I SHALL NOT STAND FOR SUCH THINGS COMING FROM MY CO-HOST!
Ultimecia: *shuts up and bites her lip*
Kuja: *grits teeth* now we have an add break.
[fade out]
[fade in on a small black mage sitting next to a waterfall]
Vivi: hi. Do you wish your life was like this?
[close up on waterfall for a few seconds]
Vivi: when in reality its like this.
[screen changes to the dollet battle sceen from ff8]
Vivi: *walks over to a small table containing bottles of pills* Pro-pills, happyness in a pill. Take two pro-pills twice daily and I garentey your life will feel more stressfree and you will feel less depressed and anxieous in one week.
Vivi: works for me! *big smile*
[close up on pills lable]
Voice-over guy: Don't take pills in conjunction with copious amounts of sugar, alcohol, drugs, other medication, bible camps, dangerous water or time-travel. If you miss a pill, take one as soon as you remember. If you overdose (take more then three pills a day) you are doomed. See doctor is problems/anxiety and paranoia pursist.
[fade out]
[fade in on Kuja and Ultimecia glearing at each other.]
Kuja: ...
Ultimecia: ....
Kuja: *sigh* Well, just say it, I know it was you Ulti.
Ultimecia: I'm telling you Kuja, I didn't slip tea in your boot!!
Kuja: THEN WHO THE HELL WAS IT??!!
Ultimecia: *shrugs* maybe you slipped?
Kuja: IN WHAT??! A TEA POOL?!!!!! .*
Ultimecia: *sigh* look, I don't know how you did it but I'm telling you: it. Wassnt. Me.
Kuja: *stands up* well fine. Im going to go get Jimi to dry clean them. *storms off*
Ultimecia: do what you want. *Sigh* looks like its my show now..
Ultimecia: ...
Ultimecia: weeeel. uhhh, what up on the nexty show eh?
....
Well, we have a interview with Ragtime Mouse; Eiko and Relm show off their artistic flair and Regent Cid chats to us--... me..i think..-about ruling a kingdom.
Ultimecia: *sweatdrop* well, uhh. That's all we have for today folks. Call again next morning for 'GOOD MORNING GAIA'!!!
[fade to black as Kuja runs on stage and chucks a boot at Ultimecia as she cackles with laughter]
[Credits:]
Show-host: Kuja Show co-host: Ultimecia Camera man: Jimi Noxtie Voice over: Voice Over Guy. Boot cleaner: Tina Wesseria Lights and sound: Amarant Coral. Tea lady: Edea Kramer Microphone check: Linda Swatterrox. Demonic kitten handler: Poor Mr Foley.
[thanks to:]
all the contestants and guests that apeared on the show. Jimmi Tina Mr Foley Amarant Ogolop control.
You, the reader.
[[look out for good morning gaia-2, the story-hopefully, somewhat-continues and uhh, I write. Stuff. Also Jimi and voice over guy return along with all the other random people I made up. ^__^ See you then, then. Then. Thank you for reading, review if you think its worth your time]]
