The problem with watching the Matrix again is that it leaves me in much more a go-blow-things-up mood than a write-an-introspective-journal-from-Apock's-pov mood, but that's what I am attempting to do. While listening to ska and studiously avoiding math homework…very fun.

I'm taking a few liberties with Apock, and if you don't like it tell me so in a review. I had to have one introspective one, and because Apock doesn't talk much but when he does he has a remarkable record on complete, well-thought-out comments, I picked him. Also because Narchannen Fae will bludgeon me to death if I don't do Apock. She'll probably bludgeon me to death anyway; if she hasn't asked you if she can kill you, then you probably don't want to know.

Ok, at last on to the story. As always, read and review; all flames will be added to the explosion in the elevator, with the bomb and the comment about there is no spoon. Mmm, explosions…

Discovered in Apock's personal files, a file saved as record 2. A different version was given to Morpheus at the time.

I am Apock, epoch, a great era. Yes. It was rather more funny at the time. I live aboard the Nebuchadnezzer, and I work in the matrix. It is at the behest of my commander Morpheus that I write this, on behalf of all the free people in the world. At this time, there are not many of us. We believe it is near the turn of the twenty-third century; population outside the matrix numbers in the mere hundreds. All of them, or in a few cases their parents, were freed by crews of ships like the Nebuchadnezzer. That is our job, my job, to free minds.

To speak for humanity, the best would be to speak of them. The only way I can manage is to speak of the others on board the Nebuchadnezzer and to speak of those I have seen passing through, though I do not know any of them enough to write of them.

I am Apock, as I have said. My real name, my name in the matrix world, is irrelevant. I am, as are all of us, a skilled computer programmer and hacker; I am also a poet of sorts and I like to write whenever I have the time. I was born in Tibet to an affluent family; I attended American schools for most of my life but I am still Tibetan. I was freed as a university student in America, learning about computers and about literature. I doubt I was missed for long.

Morpheus was the one who freed me and all the others. Morpheus is the valorous, the wise, the great commander of men, he who believes and so makes others to believe. He does not understand hesitance or the peculiar breed of doublethink that lets men hold a thought, a belief, at distance and so not truly believe. Morpheus is too the showman, the thralling voice and inexorable motions that convince us all that this is real. As a commander he is reclusive, letting us form our own friendships, as a good commander does, though he is a friend and a father to all of us.

To extend the metaphor of a family, Dozer is the elder brother. He is quiet, utterly loyal, and seems essential to the ship. Without him I believe we would fall apart; he is a comfort, a steady rock to cling to. He holds Tank steady, keeps Zypher from driving everyone crazy, keeps Trin and my dear Switch from fighting like cats.

Tank is Dozer's little brother, our operator. He's the only cheery one on the ship. He believes as much as Morpheus does; he was born steeped in the culture of Zion and does not have the guile to doubt. He is honest and true, and I fully believe that he would give his life for anyone.

Trinity has been on the Neb longer than anyone but Morpheus; she is our older sister in the crew family. She's good – smart on her feet, smart in the matrix, and fast enough to get away every time. She was one of the best hackers ever before she was freed, famous for a few jobs she did. Now she says only that they were a long time ago. She has a big destiny, like Morpheus; it's obvious if you know how to look. I do not know what it is, or even how I know except by looking at her. We all have a destiny on this ship; the air fairly crackles with it. These are interesting times to live in, as Tank believes. I am troubled – there is an old curse among the Chinese that says, "May you live in interesting times." Westerners are confused by this being a curse, but I understand it. I am rambling on and on, but I do not believe I will turn this in to Morpheus in any case; I write too much of my fellow crewmen.

I haven't spoken yet of Mouse, the little one, though he is the most noticeable of our group. He talks the most, plays courier whenever anything happens and keeps everyone entertained when we're locked down or something. He's the epitome of a hacker, too – a skinny kid with fingerless gloves and a sharp face. He's the only one of us that found Morpheus before Morpheus found him – he hacked into a first-contact Morpheus was trying to do on someone else. It scared Morpheus, then convinced him for a while that the kid was The One, but he's not. Mouse is a brilliant hacker, but he can't carry it into the mind and into his reality the way the One will.

Then there is Zypher, a person as closed on himself as his name says. He is worse since Ki – kind, altruistic Ki – died, but he has always been secretive and dangerous. I do not trust him at all, though I know too little to tell Morpheus. He has turned away from what we fight for, and he has begun not to care much. He's gone hard inside and cold. He's seen too much to believe and had too many people die, and he can't handle it. He was never very strong to begin with, though very brave and a very good fighter. Perhaps it is only that I do not like him; maybe that is the only reason I doubt him. I do not like him because he has no moral code that I can find, does not live by his honor or any human dignity. He'll chase after any girl, and even delude himself to think himself in love with her. With Ki, it may've been real, but he has chased after Trin and my beloved Switch as well. He drinks too much, though for that I can not blame him. When he has free time he spends it in one of his own programs playing violent games or who knows what else.

Switch; last but never, ever least. She is as good or better in the Matrix than Trin, stronger and smarter, though it may be my bias talking. She hates the Matrix and the machines more than anyone does; she hates being deceived and takes each person locked in the Matrix as a blow to her personal dignity. She has a soul and mind like burgundy flame, dark but as strong and powerful as a blast furnace. When faced with a metaphorical brick wall she takes a blowtorch to melt a hole through it, while others would climb it or bash their heads against it or, as I believe I would, try to find a gate. It's amazingly efficient.

That's all of us on the Neb. There was also Ki, but she is gone now, I hope to a better place than this blasted world of fear and chains, guns and Agents. There is nothing really to be said for conclusion, so enough here and an end.

AN: Sorry if I completely destroyed someone's character, but this is how I see them really. If you don't like it, tell me so. If you want to flame me, do so because my schoolbooks are still disastrously un-charred.

Has anyone else read the book Snow Crash? Random, yes, but I was thinking about hackers and the book came to mind. Read it; it'd be great to do fanfics about.