Chapter Three: Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

Tara drags the fine tooth comb through her slick, darker then normal, luxuriant blonde hair. Like every morning she was awake as the early morning sunlight streamed in through her open blinds and only partially closed curtains. It was the only time of the day where she was almost guaranteed of not running into other people while she showered. Occasionally there would be the bleary eyed student just strolling in after a long night of partying or studying, but they seldom, if ever, acknowledge her presence in the hall as they stumbled off to their room.

One final stroke through her hair and she places her comb back on her dresser. As she begins changing out of the sweats she wore to and from the shower into the clothes she had set out the night before; a light blue ankle length skirt, a plain white blouse, and a long sleeve beige sweater. Tara was able to concentrate on the larger issues in her life at the moment. Like how she was going to introduce herself to the beguiling redhead that had caught her eye at the wicca meetings last month.

A few discreet inquires and she had managed to learn that the girl's name is, Willow Rosenburg. That she has lived in Sunnydale all her life. That her boyfriend had recently left town one night without so much as a word to anyone. Tara felt terrible for Willow, for what she must be going through right now. At the same time she was glad, relieved. Exuberant would probably be closer to describing her feelings on the matter. All of which made her feel guilty because she wasn't feeling guilty.

She wanted to introduce herself to Willow only she didn't want to seem like she was throwing herself at the younger girl. So she needed to find an excuse, a reason why she would just suddenly look up a near complete stranger without it seeming like she was stalking her. The only thing they had in common was magic, but what if Willow didn't actually believe in magic. What if she was like the rest of the girls that went to the wicca meetings, using it solely as a place to meet people.

It was catch twenty-two. She wanted the girl yet she couldn't bring herself to make the first move. Too caught up in her own inner turmoil, guilt, and embarrassment to actually go out and get the girl. What she needed was a sign, a miracle of some kind. It didn't have to be a big miracle, a little one would do just as nicely for Tara at this...

A quite knock at her door pulls Tara from her thoughts. Looking at the small digital clock next to her bedside table the blonde wonders who could be showing up at her door at five minutes to seven on a Wednesday morning. True she had a small group of friends that had been known to stop by without warning, but they normally waited until later in the day to drop in unannounced.

The person on the other side of her door knocks again. Tara comes to with a start as she realizes she has just been standing in the middle of her room while somebody stood on the other side of her door. Giving herself a quick once over, just to make sure everything was in order, that her clothes hadn't suddenly vanished without a trace since she put them on, she rushes over to the door.

Pulling the obstruction open, nearly tripping over her feet in her haste, her heart tries jumping out of her chest as she forgets how to breath. There, at her door, turning back around to face her, a brilliant smile lighting up her entire face, the entire hall as far as Tara could tell, was the girl that had been plaguing her thoughts, dreams, every single moment of her existence since first setting eyes on her. Her soft jade eyes shone with all the warmth of a thousand suns as they gazed upon the taller blonde. At least that was how much heat Tara felt radiating out of them as her entire body flushes from head to toe. Ducking her head she allows her long hair to fall over her face hoping Willow didn't see her coloring just by looking at her.

"Hey," Willow greets the blonde brightly glad that this was the person she was looking for. "I don't know if you remember me from wicca group, or if..."

"Willow r-right?" Tara asks not believing she was actually there in front of her. She feels like doing flips as the entire North American butterfly population takes up residence inside her stomach.

"Right," Willow says blowing out a relieved breath. "I wasn't sure if you were the Tara I was looking for since I didn't know your last name, but since you're like the only Tara in the campus directory I figured I'd take a chance and stop by and find out first hand if you were the Tara from wicca group which you obviously are since you're her and it makes finding you so much easier then having to hack my way into Sunnydale's Department of Power and Utilities looking for you if you happened to live off campus not that I'm stalking you or anything it's just a friend of mine's in sorta trouble and I was kinda hoping that maybe you could help us figure out how to help her?"

Tara blinks several times as she tries to follow what Willow was saying, she really did, but the words went by in a rush as she found herself enraptured by the way her lips were moving and not the sounds coming out of her mouth. She feels her insides knot up as she looks at Willow. No matter what kind of relationship develops with Willow eventually she was going to have to speak and speaking was just not something she was very good at doing. "Um, m-mayb-be you c-c-oul-ld r-r-rep-peat w-what you j-jus-st s-said. J-j-just a lit-t-tle s-slower, and w-w-with periods."

Willow doesn't lose her smile as she looks at Tara. If anything the redhead's cheeks brighten slightly, no where near the color of her hair, but still it was something brighter then they had been a moment before. "Sorry about that," Willow apologizes extremely embarrassed that she had just gone into full fledged babble mode like that in front of a complete stranger. "When I'm nervous I kinda of babble and segue without really segueing..."

"W-w-would you l-like t-t-to come in?" Tara asks Willow shyly as she steps to the side.

Willow nods, "that'd probably be better then standing in the hallway while I explain what's going on that I need to pop up at your doorstep first thing on a Wednesday morning asking for help and I'm starting to babble again. I'll just step inside now," she says snapping her mouth shut while suiting her actions to her words entering Tara's room. "Then I'll lock BabbleWillow up for awhile while I explain why I did show up all unexpected on your doorstep," she finishes as Tara swings the door close behind her.

Lying on her side, her head resting lightly on her right hand with her elbow driven into the soft feathered pillow, Anya gently strokes her soft hand over Xander's shoulder. She was chewing on her full lower lip as she tried to think of a way to keep Xander safe from future Buffy. Spending eleven hundred years dispensing vengeance, to those deserving of her wrath, had given her a great deal of insight on the subject of angry women and Buffy epitomize each and every quality she had ever seen. Then again she also displayed several traits of someone suffering from a multiple personality disorder as well.

Definitely a person that Xander would do quite well to stay away from, especially considering how most of her rage was directed either at him or at Giles. She knew that keeping Xander away from the people he thought of as his friends was an impossible task as proven less then seven months ago when he stayed in town to help them prepare a battle against the Mayor of Sunnydale on his day of Ascension despite his lack of special skills or abilities. As improbable as it seemed at the time they had actually won the day, saved lots of lives, and destroyed a true demon in the process.

She wanted to demand that he stay away from them. That his only concern be keeping himself in peek physical shape so he could provide her with the many orgasms she normally enjoyed during sex. Anya knew better then to ask Xander to stay away from his friends, no matter how much she disliked them, or how often they interrupted their sex, or how being around them constantly placed them in harm's way. She had thought about withholding sex from him, if he continued associating with Willow and the others, as a form of bribery, but she didn't see why she should be punished while she forced him around to her way of thinking.

Poking him sharply in his tender ribs Xander jerks awake with a barely stifled cursed. "Jesus, Anya," he groans settling tenderly back down into the firm mattress.

"I'm sorry," she lies to him. "I didn't mean to wake you," she coos softly not seeing a point in him knowing the truth. "I just wanted to make sure you're alright," she adds not realizing she just told him the truth.

Xander smiles wanly at Anya. "Aside from sore ribs that wake me up every half hour I'm peachy," he replies as he closes his eyes and tries to drift back to sleep. "Although it's probably a good thing I don't have job right now. I'd just have to call in sick, telling them how I bruised them playing rugby or some other lame British sport like cribbage."

"That's a card game hon," Anya informs him politely.

"A really rough game of cribbage then, were they use rugby rules," he mumbles starting to fall back to sleep only to feel another sharp jab from Anya's finger. "Christ Anya, what the hell is it?" He growls at the ex-vengeance demon as he rolls back over with a sharp grimace.

"I want you to be nice to Buffy," Anya answers in a rush.

Xander blinks several times, "An I'm always nice to Buff. Hell I'd never not be nice to Buffy," he informs his lover. Leaning upwards he gives her a soft peck on the cheek, "now if that's all..."

"You're not always nice to Buffy," Anya snaps out. When she had felt Cordelia's pain and decided that she was deserving of a wish she had first looked into the situation as was proscribed by the elders. She needed to determine if the man, Xander in this case, was truly the cause of the woman's pain or not. She had complete discretion in determining if the man was to blame in all her cases, not that she had ever found a case where the man wasn't at fault for the pain the women were in. With Xander it had been easy to determine he was the cause of Cordelia's pain. "Besides I wasn't talking about Buffy from this time," Anya clarifies her statement for Xander. "I was referring to the Buffy from our future, or the future that would have been if she hadn't come back in time," Anya shakes her head clearing it of the headache thinking about time travel causes her.

Sometimes Xander thought it was more then his sanity was worth dating the ex-vengeance demon. Out of all the women that he had dated she still had the most original way of trying to end his existence: Mrs. French had wanted to eat his head while having sex with him, Empada had wanted to suck the life out of him, so hadn't Cordiela but in an entirely different way, Faith had simply tried to choke him to death.

Anya had been original. She had created an entire reality were he was a vampire that wound up getting staked by Buffy. Unlike all the other women who had tried to kill him in the course of his life, Anya had at least done it before they had ever gone out on a date. "Fine," Xander grumbles, "if it'll let me get a little in peace in quite then I'll be nice to Buffy."

Anya shakes her head as Xander lies back down, "good," she sighs lying down next to him. With a content smile on her face she snuggles in closer to the man she loves. She was happy that Xander was going to be nice to Buffy. It meant that Xander would soon be able to perform all of his manly duties. Mainly providing her with many, many orgasms.

The image on the screen changes showing a different girl's image for a moment before changing again to show yet a third girl, then a fourth, and a fifth. Each woman had several qualities in common with the others. They were all young, had blonde hair, and resided within Sunnydale and had been photographed on surveillance cameras located throughout the town.

Riley Finn's intense blue eyes stare at the images flickering past on the computer monitor as if he could simply will the image he desired to see to appear on the screen before him. He knew the woman he had seen last night. Knew it like he had never known anything before, of that he was positive. It was a feeling, deep in his gut, that he couldn't get rid of no matter how hard he tried. So instead of getting any sleep last night he had come here, commandeered a work station, fed the computer his criteria, and allowed it to sift through all the surveillance photo's stored in it's massive hard drives.

"And here I thought frat boys slept till noon," Professor Maggie Welsh jokes as she stops behind Riley. Taking a sip of her coffee she gazes at the images flashing past on the computer screen. Pressing her thin lips together she moves her bone thin frame to Riley's side, "you know there are easier ways for you to find a girl to date. Ways that don't involve you violating their constitutional rights." A small smile creases Riley's lips for a moment, "besides I thought you were smitten with the Summers girl?" She probes politely.

Riley freezes, a look of shock, horror, and anger settle over his face. "Stupid son of a..." He hisses pissed at himself that he didn't see it last night. Of course it was just the other night that Buffy had told him she was marrying this Spike guy, hostile seventeen if he didn't know any better.

"What is it?" Welsh demands never having seen this look of betrayal marring Riley's face before. Placing a hand on his shoulder, trying to lend him what ever support she could she again asks, "Riley what's wrong?"

Riley's thick fingers stab at the keyboard in front of him as he replies, "have you had a chance to go over last nights mission reports?"

"I was just on my way," she tells him.

"We ran across hostile seventeen last night. He wasn't alone," he adds quickly before Professor Welsh can ask why he hadn't been recaptured. "In fact I believe he was with the hostile who orchestrated his escape from Stevenson Hall," he states knowing full well him and his team would receive a reprimand for lying on a mission statement. "You'll understand why we didn't try to tag it last night after reading the report, suffice to say I didn't think one squad would be capable of bringing her down. Not without fatalities anyway."

"Just what the hell did you run into last night?"

"This," Riley answers as Buffy's collage I.D. photo materializes on the monitor. "That was what we saw last night. Either the real thing or something mimicking her likeness."

"Summers, Buffy A," Welsh says tapping her finger over her lips. "She's an outstanding student if a little quirky. Strong willed, not afraid to stand up for herself or her friends, but always acting like she has something to hide. Why pose as a collage student though?" Welsh inquires deep in thought, "why Sunnydale? What's here that draws hostiles in?"

"I don't know," Riley answers, "but whatever it is Hostile Seventeen and... They were taking out everything that got in their path."

Welsh nods, "possibly trying to claim a territory as their own. Its what predators do when they move into an area, kill off the competition." Looking down at Riley she says, "you're going to have to get close to her." She stops seeing Riley stiffen at the suggestion, "you're the only one that can. You're already established because of your attempts to start a relationship with it. If someone new were to come along now it might raise it's suspicions and until we find out what it's intentions are we can't have it being suspicious of anything."

"Yes mam," Riley replies stiffly.

Giles slaps another of his books close as he leans back in his chair with a deep sigh. He drops the book onto his leg as he pulls his glasses off and pinches his nose between thumb and forefinger. Yesterday had blurred into today without a whimper and him barely aware enough to notice the change as he had stayed up all night going through his books looking for anything that could explain this situation to his satisfaction.

Unfortunately he hadn't even begun to scratch the surface and already he felt his chances of finding even a slim lead slip from despairing to abysmal the more he researched. He had found demons that could traverse time as easily as crossing the street. He had found demons that could either assume somebody else's identity, though that involved them sucking all the life experiences out of their minds leaving the person little more then a vegetable. He had found demons that could morph their physical features, but that didn't gain them any knowledge of the person. True it could be some kind group venture to sow discord amongst Buffy and her friends, but Giles just didn't see any factions of demons banding together to accomplish an objective of this magnitude.

There had been one person, demon, Giles wasn't quite sure what he was, called Sahjhan that fit the bill quite nicely. Time travel, cast glamours on himself to look like other people, gain knowledge by literally going back or forth through time to watch events unfold. Fortunately he was completely incorporeal. He couldn't effect solid matter in the slightest, with a quick glance at his countertop he shudders, which was extremely good consider the type of person he had been when he was last a flesh and blood being.

Shifting his head he looks up towards his room. With some trepidation he wonders which Buffy he was going to be subjected to when she finally awoke today. The girl who barely controlled her fury towards anyone she came in contact with, with the exception of Spike. In which case she barely controlled other desires no less primal if far less life threatening.

Or the Buffy that had come back from patrol last night almost glowing with the biggest grin he had ever seen plastered across her face. He had almost asked her what she had done with Spike, but had decided he would rather not know what the two of them had been up to. He was, to say the least, stunned beyond words when she had plopped down on his couch lying flat on her back and asked him if he had found anything. He had answered her honestly and she had inquired as to which tomes he was delving through, again he told her the truth and was slightly disconcerted when she nodded her head appreciatively at the titles he mentioned.

Then she did something, which would have knock him off his feet had he been standing. It was something the Buffy he knew would never had done. She had actually suggested several other volumes for him to peruse in his quest to find answers. Books he had in fact been planning to search once he had finished with his current selections.

How Buffy had even known the titles, much less what the books contained within their covers, beggared his imagination. It wasn't that he thought Buffy was stupid, her S.A.T. scores proved otherwise, it was simply that she chose to remain ignorant of what she considered his field of expertise. Or anything else she thought of as uncool.

After offering her advice she had yawned, stretching her thin body out on his couch he listened with a slight grimace as her joints began popping back into place while she shifted her body. Rising to her feet she had given him a soft peck on the forehead along with a whispered thank you and gone up to the room she had confiscated to sleep away the rest of the night. While he stayed down below, more determined then ever to find out what was going on with the girl sleeping in his room.

Tossing the book down, where his coffee table had once been, he stands up stretching his arms over his head and bending back slightly he feels his spine slip back into place. Knowing today was going to be an extremely long day, one in which large quantities of tea were going to be in great demand if he was going to stay awake to find anything of use, he walks into his kitchen trying to ignore the giant spiderweb crack in his countertop.

A task all but impossible as he began to gather the materials he would need to brew his tea. The fact that his countertop was now below his belt buckle was not lost on the him either. With a disgruntle shake of his head he realizes that with the damage inflicted to the countertop alone he very much doubted he would get his security deposit back when he finally left Sunnydale.

Settling the teapot onto his stovetop he pulls a ceramic cup from his cupboard as a soft knock at his door lets him know somebody has arrived. Giving his apartment a quick once over, just to make sure as much of the debris is gone as is possible, Buffy and Willow having given him a hand in clearing out the broken furniture last night before they had left. Only the couch and the countertop still showed signs of the struggle that had taken place within the room.

Looking at the door a moment before he carefully pulls it open he realizes they weren't the only thing to still show signs of damage. While the door looked like it was secure it was in fact held on by very little. The locks had been set when Buffy had opened it last night, the inch in a half piece of steel had been snapped cleanly in half when she had twisted the door handle. Sections of the doorframe had been broken off when she had jerked the door open, and the hinges had been ripped completely out of the other side of the casing.

With extreme caution he opens the door to the sight of a brightly smiling Willow and a taller, blonde hair girl who seemed to be hiding a rather lovely face behind a mop of long blonde hair. Knowing Willow as well as he did he could only assume that she had taken the initiative and gone ahead and contacted the Tara girl that Buffy had mentioned. Her soft blue eyes gazed up at him almost fearfully.

"Hi Giles," Willow greets him cheerfully. Far too cheerfully for someone who hasn't slept in over a day. "You'll never guess who I happened to run into?"

Giles manages to give the youngster a brief, if somewhat mirthless, smile as he says, "if by run into you mean showing up at their doorstep at some ungodly hour of the morning then I'm assuming this must be Tara." He extends his hand to the young woman.

The young girl lightly takes his hand as if she was afraid he was going to hurt her. "Tara this is Giles, or Mr. Giles, Giles this Tara Maclay," Willow introduces the two of them.

"It's a pleasure to finally meet," Giles greets Tara as she extricates her hand from his grip.

With everything Willow had told her about Mr. Giles Tara almost felt like she was meeting Willow's father. With as important as Willow had made him out to be she thought that he might be more important to the redhead then her biological father was. She wanted to make her best impression, better then any impression she ever made on anyone before. Swallowing she tries to meet his soft, grandfatherly brown eyes. "W-willow's t-told me s-so much ab-b-bout you," she says painfully slow trying to pronounce each word without her normal stutter. Failing to do so she drops her head even further allowing her hair to hide her face.

Giles quickly steps out of the way as he gestures the pair of women inside, "please why don't you come in?" With as much care as he had used opening the door he now uses it to close the heavy door. He understood quite well just how damaging even a mild stutter could be for a person, and Tara's stutter seemed to be anything but mild. It might be easier for her if she didn't feel intimidated by the people around her, perhaps if she was talking about something she had some knowledge or took a special interest in. "I understand that your a practicing witch," Giles says leading the girls to the counter.

Tara looks at the counter with wonderment. She had believed Willow when she had told of the events of the previous day, but until seeing the evidence she hadn't truly believed it. Now that she was seeing the evidence it just made it that much more real. "I-I'm s-s-sorry," she says realizing that Giles had said something to her and she hadn't heard what it was. It was like she was meeting the parents of the first person she had ever dated and she was making one blunder right after another. In a way that was exactly what was happening since she had never dated anyone in high school. She had simply long from afar.

"Its quite alright," Giles assures her as he makes his way into his kitchen on the other side of his counter. "It can be rather disconcerting seeing something like this for the first time," he continues pulling a second cup out of the cupboard, "would you care for a cup of tea."

"You have to try Giles' tea," Willow exhorts the larger girl. "If you've never had tea from England then you have to try. Giles makes it just like they do since you know he's English because he comes from England because he was born over there and was raised by English people who..." she sputters off under Giles' unwavering stare.

Giles sees Tara's grin, only partial hidden by her hair, as she gazes longingly at Willow. For a moment he wonders just what type of relationship the two witches have in the future. He could still recall Buffy's comment from the other night. More importantly he remembered how she had said it, like it was a great secret. Pulling his mind back to the moment he again asks, "would you like a cup of tea or would you prefer..."

"T-tea w-would b-b-be fine," she manages to answer.

Giles nods his head as he pulls out a third cup just as the tea begins to steam releasing a shrill whistle. Quickly removing the kettle from the stove Giles places it in the middle of his serving tray before moving the tray to the counter. Placing the finely worked silver tray in-between himself in the two girls, studiously ignoring the look Tara continues to give Willow while the redhead babbles from one topic to another without any rhyme or reason that Giles can decipher, the retired librarian pours tea for everyone at the counter.

Clearing his throat softly he brings Willow to a halt. She colors slightly from falling back into her babble mode again. She didn't know why but she had been babbling all day long, just spontaneously going off on one tangent after another without pause.

Both girls turn their heads to look at Giles with almost equally guilty expressions on their faces. Willow from babbling and Tara from being caught gazing at Willow. Tara knew she was going to have to do a much better job at guarding herself while she was around Willow if she didn't want to frighten the younger girl off. She knew that Willow was straight, that she'd had a boyfriend. Tara knew all that but she didn't care. Even if all she ever got was to be Willow's friend then that was all that she would be. At least that way she would be able to be around the beautiful redhead.

"So just how long have you been practicing magic?" Giles inquires of Tara, again trying to set her at ease in her new surroundings.

Before Tara can say anything though the front door opens without so much as knock drawing everybody's eyes as Buffy slips inside carrying a small duffel bag. "Hey guys," she greets the room as she gingerly closes door. "Figured I'd bring my evil twin some clothes since it looked like she was traveling kinda light. You'd say we're about the same size right," she jokes tossing the bag to the floor behind the couch she turns to face the room. Taking in the new person sitting at Giles counter she gives Tara her brightest smile as she makes her way to the blonde that has yet to take her eyes off her. "Hi," Buffy says greeting her happily as she extends her hand to Tara who takes it without really thinking about what she was doing. "You must be Tara, I'm Buffy. Not the mad Buffy from the future, but the sane girl from now."

Tara couldn't believe what she was seeing from Buffy's aura. While far from being pure it was perhaps the noblest aura she had ever seen in her short life. Cracks were beginning to appear though, small, hardly even noticeable, and just around the edges. Dropping her eyes she lets go of Buffy's hand as she says, "its an honor to meet you."

"Give it a couple days," Buffy replies moving around to the kitchen where she pops open the door to Giles refrigerator. "Once the first apocalypse is averted it want seem so honorable," she adds pulling out a can of diet coke.

Tara frowns at the comment as Giles asks, "did anything interesting happen last night?"

"Not a thing," the tiny blonde answers opening the can and taking a sip of the soda. "It was dead, weather because Spike's soldier boys are way better then we thought or my future self is one hell of a bad ass," she finishes walking away from Giles.

"Speaking of which," Willow begins as she adds a tiny bit of cream to her tea. "Has anybody seen them since they took off out of here last night?"

Buffy shakes her head, "Buffy's upstairs, sleeping I believe. I haven't seen Spike since he left with her last night," Giles says noting the crease in Buffy's forehead at the mention of Spike's disappearance for the night.

The watcher is far from being only to notice the worried look on her face. "I'm sure he's fine," Willow consoles Buffy. "You know Spike. He can't take care of himself," Willow adds. "He's been..."

"Like I care what the hell happens to Spike," Buffy waspishly snaps at Willow instantly regretting it a moment later. "Look Spike's a big boy who can handle whatever comes his way."

Tara frowns at the smaller girl as she notices several of the cracks in her aura lengthen slightly with her denial. She was going to have to find a time to talk to Buffy about what she was seeing. It was not a conversation she was anticipating with anything remotely resembling excitement. It was however something that she had to do. If she didn't then Buffy would be heading down a very dark road.

Buffy stretches languidly as she slowly comes awake from the first fitless nights sleep she can remember having in nearly a month. For some unknown reason she felt satiated and energized all at the same time. She hadn't felt this vitalized in longer then she cares to remember, or can remember for that matter. There was the morning after her first night with Spike. For a brief moment that morning she had felt something close to this level of fulfillment. Then she had realized what had happened and she had stamped down on the confusing and burgeoning emotions that were washing through her mind and body.

For the first time in months she has woken up without the constant gnawing in the pit of her stomach. If she didn't know better she would say she felt good. There was no stiffness in her joints as she moved. All the minor aches and pains that had been plaguing her were gone. She actually felt like today might be better then the day before.

Scowling she pushes the feeling down. Berating herself savagely she once again reminds herself that she had no right to be happy, no right to feel good about herself while Spike was still gone, or while the Lurky still lived. She was going to have to do something about that. The demon had toyed with her, had taken amusement out of her pain. It was an insult that she just couldn't let go. She had promised the demon if he didn't give her what she wanted then she was going to kill him, and being stuck three years in the past was definitely not what she wanted.

Now all she had to do was find out everything she could about him, which meant long boring evenings stuck with Giles' books. A task she was not looking forward to, or you could talk to the oldest living person you know, the thought pops unbidden into her head. Amazingly enough the thought was oddly reminiscent of Dawn's superior, almost haughty tone of voice.

"Whatever," Buffy mumbles disgruntle even while she silently agrees with the voice. Anya just might be her best bet at getting information about Lurky. After all who should no more about a wish granting demon then an ex-wish granting demon. All she had to do was corner the former vengeance demon while Xander wasn't around, because seeing the walking joke right now really wasn't high on her list of priorities.

Tossing the blanket aside she stops in astonishment as she stares down at her nude body. She knows for a fact that she hadn't undressed after jumping on Giles bed last night, at least she didn't think she had undressed. Maybe it was something she did after she had fallen asleep. Not wanting to sleep in dirty and bloody clothes if she didn't have to so subconsciously, while she was sleeping, she had undressed and gotten under the covers.

Somewhat satisfied with her reasoning she slides her bone thin legs over the side of the bed. Picking up her jeans she slips them back on. Deciding her white blouse had seen better days she pulls upon Giles' armoire and rummages through the old English antique as she pulls out one of his dress shirts. Tossing it on the bed she pulls out one of his white t-shirts and slips it on over her head, then picks up the button down shirt and puts it on. Both shirts were far too large for her, but she didn't care. The entire philosophy of beggars can't be choosers flitting through her mind. After settling her feet into her boots she tucks the t-shirt into her jeans before snapping them up, pushing the sleeves of the dress shirt up she grabs Spike's duster and settles the heavy leather coat over her shoulders.

Turning towards the door she frowns slightly seeing the cracked casing. She hadn't meant to do that last night, then again she didn't even realize she had done it until now. Seeing Spike sitting there, as unconcerned about everything as he always was, had simple brought it all rushing back. She had a desperate need to get away from him before she had attacked him again.

Even now it was a struggle not to follow that pleasant tingle in the base of her spine that would unerringly lead her to Spike. He was farther away today then he had been yesterday, which was good because the closer he was to her the harder it was to fight her desire to take him wherever they were. Her body didn't understand that this wasn't her Spike, it didn't care. Spike was here that was all that mattered.

Pulling the door open she descends the stairs in a rush stopping at the foot, dead in her tracks, she takes in the room around her. More precisely she takes in the people in the room. Her heart feels as if it has simply stopped in her chest as she hear Tara's soft voice as the blonde witch replies to Willow's question. If asked she couldn't tell what words Tara had spoken.

She gazes at Tara as she sits at the counter a cup of Giles' tea, probably forgotten, warming her hands as her gentle, hazel eyes are simply enraptured with the sight of Willow as the redhead animatedly tells one of the gangs adventure from back in high school. On the kitchen side of the counter Giles refills his cup of tea as he corrects Willow on some minor detail that didn't really matter to anybody but him. Sitting on the arm of the couch was herself happily adding color commentary to Willow's story. Tara herself would smile shyly, or laugh lightly at whatever the person would say then go back to her intense study of Willow.

It was something she hadn't seen in over a year, everybody gathered around trying their best to make one person feel comfortable, welcomed within their group. She tries to remember when that had stopped being the way they did things. When they had stopped being nice just to be nice. Was it the day Tara died or had they split apart even before then. The day Xander left Anya at the alter, or did it happen while she was dead and their entire focus had been on resurrecting her, or was it the day they found out Dawn was the key and that all their memories had been altered to fit her little sister in them. Or maybe it was just the culmination of seven years worth of pain, suffering, and death that had finally wedged them apart.

True she had told Willow about Tara but she hadn't thought about what the repercussions of being in the past would be. Of all the things that had changed over the years, her mother's death, Dawn not being here despite what her memories to the contrary told her. There were things that she could change. Things she could make better, for herself, for everyone. Only she couldn't think of a single reason why she should make their lives better when they had done nothing but cause her misery.

Tara never hurt you, that annoying voice blurts out angrily inside her head, and what you're just gonna let mom die? Again! Like finding her body once wasn't bad enough. You're just gonna wait for it to happen? What a bitch! Maybe this time you'd like to be there, sitting around having a cup of cocoa with her so you can watch her die? Would that make you...

Fine, she hisses back at the annoying voice. The thing seems to be patterning itself after Dawn for some reason she can't fathom. She could almost feel her younger sister's I got my way smile in the back of her skull.

"Buffy," Giles greeting cuts through the haze in her head.

"Yeah," her younger self answers.

Giles lets out an exhausted sigh, as he plucks his glasses from his nose, "we're really going to have to something about names," he says tiredly as he rubs the bridge of his nose. Both Buffy's recognized the tone of Giles, I've been up all night researching, voice. At his comment all three girls turn their heads to the new comer as Giles says more loudly, "I hope you had a restful evening?"

Tara barely manages to hold back a gasp as she looks at the older version of the Buffy she had meant for the first time a few minutes ago.

"Hi Buffy," Willow greets her best friend from the future, at least she hoped she was still Buffy's best friend in the future. Only Buffy had said that Tara and her were best friends in the future, but that didn't mean she still couldn't be best friends with Buffy at the same time.

Buffy watches her older counterpart intently, but no matter how hard she looks she can't find any trace of the sunny disposition she had seen last night before she left the apartment to go on patrol. This was definitely the pissed off at the world Buffy that had first appeared here yesterday groping Spike like he was a special kind of squeeze me toy she couldn't get her fill of. Involuntarily she shudders at the image she just invoked with her wondering thoughts. She had no desire, what-so-ever, to see Spike naked, or to have her hands doing anything that involved touching the blonde vampire's body, let alone gripping the one part of his anatomy she has yet to see. "I brought you over some clothes, in case you wanted to change out of what you're wearing," she says cautiously to herself.

For some reason Giles sounded pleased to see her this morning. She was fairly positive the impression she left him with last night wasn't one he would be wanting to be experience again anytime soon. Buffy was still wary of her, though she was looking at her like she was expecting something else. Willow seemed to be sitting on cloud nine and was completely oblivious to the reason why. And poor Tara looked positively terrified to be looking at her. What a way to introduce the nicest person she was ever likely to meet to the chaos that is her life.

"I took your advice from last night," Willow continues cheerfully heedless of the tension building around her. "You know, to see if you were telling the truth. And well you probably already know Tara, but Tara this is Future Buffy," she frowns slightly. "We're going to have to come with something better to call you then Future Buffy..."

Without saying a word to anyone Buffy makes a beeline to the door and pulls it open only to have the door come off in her hand. She looks at it curiously for moment, there was almost a sense of something she had already done before. Leaning the door up against the wall she mumbles loud enough for everyone to hear, "should really have Xander fix that," before bolting out the door.

Giles looks from the door to Buffy asking, "did that seem oddly familiar?"

"It was almost exactly what she said last night," Willow answers having noticed the exact same thing as Giles. "Like she didn't even remember ripping the door of its hinges last night," she elaborates.

"She didn't," Buffy answers. "That was the I'm angry at the world Buffy that first appeared yesterday."

"That would certainly explain her odd behavior last night," Giles says as he explains what happened earlier this morning when Buffy had arrived back at the flat. "No offense to you Buffy but your knowledge of occult reference and demonology source material is somewhat lacking shall we say for lack of a better word."

Tara clears her throat trying to get everybody's attention. What she had to say was far to important for her to remain quite. "Guys," she manages to say strongly without any trace of her stutter. Once everyone's eyes were on her though she could feel her inside knotting up again, like everything inside of her wanting to get outside. Her lungs were burning and her heart was hammering inside her chest trying to find a way out.

That was until she felt a pair of soft, warm hands wrap around hers. The entire world just falls away from around her. Willow's reassuring voice was the only thing she hears, her words meant just for her and her alone. "Its okay, just take your time. You don't have to worry about what you say, how it comes out or anything else because nobody here is going to judge you. Heck none of the rest of us say anything the right way, except for Giles but that has to with the whole English thing, how nobody from England can speak in anything but perfect English. It's some obscure law in England and anybody that can't follow it gets deported to America where we can talk anyway we want so you just say what you have to say and we're just going to sit here and listen. Okay?"

Buffy watches as Tara seems to loose herself in Willow as she speaks to her. With the way Willow was returning Tara's look Buffy could tell the attraction was mutual. This was something she had never seen coming, Willow being attracted to a girl. Quickly she glances at Giles only to notice he's studiously cleaning his glasses that he had just cleaned several minutes ago.

Tara nods her head nearly a minute after Willow had finished her speech, "okay," she says just for Willow. Drawing upon the strength that Willow was lending her Tara turns to look at Buffy, she was the one that truly needed to understand what she had seen with her future self. "I c-can read people's aura's. The s-s-stronger the p-pers-son, the easier it is for me to see their aura," she admits hesitantly.

"Incredible! To actually have the strength and skill at such a young age. You must have had a phenomenal teacher to bring you so far," Giles states enthusiastically.

Tara blushes deeply at Giles' praise, "I did," she replies softly ducking her head again. "I t-try not to use it all the time, just to g-get a f-feel f-for a person. A lot of p-p-people just don't have very strong aura's anymore," she pauses trying to find the right way to say what she has to, "like they've allowed themselves to w-w-wither away inside. M-most people I can tell what kind of person they are by what I see: nice or mean, c-cruel or sensitive, protective or petty, the different combinations of qualities s-since nobody's ever just one thing. There are a few people, people so st-strong that they shine s-so brightly it almost hurts to look at them."

"So its like looking at a light then?" Buffy asks, "the brighter it is the better the person."

Tara shakes her head knowing she was going to have to give a fuller explanation to Buffy then she was prepared to do. Perhaps if she could explain it in the simplest terms she could think of, then maybe Buffy would understand. "The br-brightness doesn't indicate if the person is g-good or evil, it just measure of how s-strong a person is inside. P-picture a w-window stained with all the colors you can imagine. G-giles is v-very br-bright, like a reading lamp, lots of c-colors, but there are some d-dark undercurrents in his aura, but mostly he's very c-concerned of his l-loved ones and he's willing to commit qu-questionable, even evil acts in order to pr-protect the ones he cares for. Overall he's a v-very nice man, b-but not s-someone you'd w-want to make an enemy of.

"Wh-when I look at you it's l-like s-staring into a fl-flood lamp, a very br-bright sh-shiny, multi colored fl-flood lamp. Loving, noble, s-self-s-sacrificing. You'd give up everything to make everyone around you happy and destroy yourself in the process."

"What about?" Willow inquires looking out the door that Buffy had gone out.

Tara takes a deep breath, "it w-was almost like trying to read s-several people j-jammed into one place at the s-s-same time. There was a darkness, a sense of evil... I th-thought it was going to overwh-whelm me if I l-look at her t-t-too long, but at the same time there was an inn-innocence to her I-I've never seen in anyone before. Wh-what was Buffy, what was you in the future," she shudders slightly and Willow places her hand on Tara's shoulder offering her whatever strength she needed. Tara smiles grateful for the support, "r-remember that stained glass window I mentioned before?" At Buffy's nod she continues, "n-now imagine it dr-dropped to the fl-floor and shattered into a m-million p-pieces that somebody has come along and gr-ground into the f-f-finest powder. That's wh-what your aura is like in the future," she says a soft almost ominous whisper. It wasn't everything that she had seen when she had looked at Buffy but the rest of it wasn't anything anybody but Buffy, the one that had left, needed to be concerned with.

Buffy shivers at the proclamation, "how?" She asks in a small sliver of her normal voice.

Tara shakes her head, "I d-don't really know how," she admits. "You have to stop f-f-fighting w-w-with yourself. Your heart and your mind, your going to have to find a way to re-reconcile what you mind wants with wh-what your heart wants. If y-y-you d-don't th-then you might wind up j-j-just like your future self."

Buffy turns away from the Tara and her friends. Crossing her arms over her chest she brings her right hand to her mouth and begins nibbling on her fingernail. There was nothing that she was fighting with herself over. There was Spike, but that had nothing to do with her head or her heart. That was her body pure and simple, lusting after something that she couldn't have, shouldn't even be thinking about having. There had to be something else going on in her life, or that would be going on in her life, something that she didn't realize was troubling her yet.

"That was amazing," Willow gushes proudly, "you were amazing."

Tara cheeks redden even more at Willow's praise, "I d-d-didn't r-r-really do anyth-thing," she replies modestly. All she had done was look at Buffy and told her what she had seen. There was nothing praise worthy involved in that.

"Don't be silly. Saying all that stuff and you barely stuttered at all," Willow says warmly. The smile that shines on Tara warms the young witch from head to toe as her color brightens another shade deeper. "And all the information. You really helped us, we never would've known just how bad off Buffy was if it hadn't been for you. I mean...I'm assuming having your aura ground to powder is a bad thing?" She asks looking at Tara.

"It's a crippling experience for most people," Giles replies. "Only somebody with a truly indomitable will would be able to go on after having their aura shattered."

"What about somebody that's been possessed?" Willow questions thoughtfully going over the facts that she has. "It would explain why she's not acting like Buffy, plus it fits in with what Tara said about evil and innocent dominating her aura."

"N-n-not d-dominate," Tara asserts. "M-more l-l-like two s-s-separate aura's, and B-b-buffy's s-still th-there just in a l-lot of p-pain."

A flurry of motion pulls everyone's eyes to the door as a smoldering blanket comes bursting through the open doorway. "Spike," Giles mumbles in a hard voice. He had hoped he had seen the last of the blonde vampire when he hadn't shown up with Buffy last night.

Spike quickly tosses the blanket to the floor stomping on it to put out the small flames. "Bloody hell watcher. Figure you would've gotten the door fixed by now, any bloke can just come wandering in off the street way you got it now."

"Vampire!" Tara squawks in a loud voice.

Spike looks at the blonde that had just named him for what he is with a smoldering smile. The fear the girl was radiating now was practically intoxicating to him. "That's right, vampire here and its about time you folks started bloody remembering it," he says proudly.

Tara looks around at everybody else but nobody was paying the least bit of attention to the vampire Giles had called Spike. Then the name clicks in her head as she remembers their earlier conversation. This was the Spike that Buffy was fighting herself over. It was no wonder Buffy was fighting herself.

"Don't worry," Willow whispers loud enough for everyone to hear her. "Spike's harmless, at least to humans." She had expected her words to have a sort of calming influence on Tara but if anything she had gotten even more tense.

"That's right just go and tell everyone about it why don't you," Spike growls pulling a nearly fresh pack of cigarettes from his coat pocket. "Spike went and got himself a sodding chip shoved in his brain," he adds lighting a cigarette. "Now he can't go around and snack on all the nice little human boys and girls like he wants to," he finishes as smoke billows out of his mouth.

Willow smiles at Spike as she says, "Spike this is Tara, he's kinda of good now..."

"Hey I'm still evil," Spike disagrees, "I just can't hurt humans anymore," he grosses morbidly.

Willow rolls her eyes at the vampires comment, "...he helps us sometimes since he got his chip."

"Pleasure to meet you pet," Spike mutters not seeing anyway around being nice to the girl. Besides it wasn't like she had ever done anything to him. It wasn't like she was Harris after all.

Giles glares at the vampire who was standing in the middle of his doorway. There was something to what Willow said. Spike was kind of good at the moment, but he had no doubt about what Spike would do if the chip ever came out of his head. "What do you want Spike?"

Spike's head snaps up to look at the watcher still ignoring the Slayer who was standing off to the side trying to remain unnoticed. It wasn't like he hadn't seen her upon entering the watchers flat but if she wanted to play this game he could play it as well as she could. "Your little houseguest, all miss innocent sweet school girl act she puts on," Spike begins his rant pacing in a small line in front of the group as his hand weaves a simple pattern to his mouth and back out again.

"What about her?" Giles asks quickly, hoping to cut off Spike's speech before it took him five minutes to get the point.

Spike blinks as stops almost mid step. "What about her?" He mimics Giles, "the sodding chit's bloody evil, is what about her." He gripes popping his cigarette into his mouth.

"You got proof?" Buffy demands, speaking for the first time since Spike's arrival, as she moves away from the wall.

"Better then that I was there when she committed her depraved act," Spike storms a moment before he begins pacing again.

Giles steps into the pallor asking Spike, "you were there and you didn't try to stop her?"

"I didn't even see it coming until it was all over," Spike replies blowing smoke. "One moment she's all politeness, smiles, la, la, la, la. The next she a conniving fiend and I'm left standing there holding the bag."

"Okay Spike," Willow soothes. "Its understandable you being upset and all. I mean who likes getting blamed for an atrocity when you didn't commit it right?"

"Bloody right," Spike agrees blowing smoke out from his mouth and nose.

"What exactly did she do?" Giles inquires.

"She skipped out on the soddin check," Spike rages. "There she is oh I'm hungry Spike, let's go to Anthony's over on Spruce..."

"I go there all the time," Buffy cuts in, "they got the best pies of anyplace in Sunnydale."

"That's what you said last night too, right before you ran up a seventy dollar bill then asked me to scare the clerk into giving us the meal for free, only while I'm doing my whole grr, your running out the bloody door without so much as a backward glance, leaving me standing there, in the middle of the sodding shop, like some wanker with my pecker in hand," he elaborates as he continues to puff angrily on his cigarette as he paces Giles' front room.

"Let me get this straight," Giles says trying to keep the smile off his face for the moment. "The other Buffy stiffed you with the check and you're calling her evil."

"Bloody hell right I am," Spike declares vehemently.

"And did you actually pay this bill?"

Spike snorts at the watcher's suggestion, "right. Like I'm gonna go around clearing the Slayer's tabs for her." Spike flips his burnt out stub of a cigarette through the watchers entrance. "So what are you going to do about this evil slayer you got on your hands?"

________________________________________________________________________

Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood - The Animals

Baby, do you understand me now
Sometimes I feel a little mad
But don't you know that no one alive
Can always be an angel
When things go wrong I seem to be bad
But I'm just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood
Baby, sometimes I'm so carefree
With a joy that's hard to hide
And sometimes it seems that all I have do is worry
Then you're bound to see my other side
But I'm just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood
If I seem edgy I want you to know
That I never mean to take it out on you
Life has it's problems and I get my share
And that's one thing I never meant to do
Because I love you
Oh, Oh baby don't you know I'm human
Have thoughts like any other one
Sometimes I find myself long regretting
Some foolish thing some little simple thing I've done
But I'm just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood
Yes, I'm just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood
Yes, I'm just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood