CHAPTER FOUR
BEHIND CLOSED DOORS
-8 YEARS
MADONNA:
I stumbled into the apartment and brushed a few stray pieces of hair off of my face. They clung to my forehead, and to the back of my neck. My shirt was damp, my calves and side hurt, but I'd met my goal.
Kat glanced up from the couch and smiled at me. "So didja do it?" she asked.
I nodded, taking in a few breaths. "Two miles."
She clapped dramatically. "I'm so proud of you," she laughed, slight sarcasm edging her voice. "Now go take a shower before you drip sweat all over the floor."
I grinned at her and pulled my hair up off my neck, holding it behind my head as I walked to the bathroom. I stripped down and rinsed off in a cool stream of water. I took my time; I was in no great hurry.
A few minutes later, I stepped out of the tub and wrapped myself in a bath towel. Katarina had left the couch when I opened the door again. I heard her on the phone and poked my head into the living room. She was out on the balcony. "How can you say that?"
Her voice held a dangerous edge to it. I stopped for a moment to listen to her. "If you want my help, it'll be on my conditions."
I could take a guess as to who she was talking to. She walked back into the living room and our eyes met briefly. I tensed, hoping that whoever it was, she wouldn't hand the phone over to me. She rolled her eyes at the caller and walked into the kitchen. I smiled sympathetically and walked to my room, holding the towel over my chest as I opened the door and slipped inside.
My room wasn't empty. I gasped and spun as the faint sound of the closing window alerted me of that fact. "Omigod!"
The towel slipped from my grasp. He turned as I spoke, then quickly whirled around to face the window again. "Sorry!"
I scrambled to pull the cover back up and wrap it around me again, my face flushing. I swallowed hard as I clenched it over my chest. "You... scared me."
His head lowered, still facing away from me. "I am so sorry! I can come back later. I didn't know..."
"Oh, no, no! It's okay!" I cried, scanning the room for my robe. I found it on the post of the bed. I grabbed it quickly and turned away from him, throwing it over my shoulders. "It's okay, you don't have to leave. Please."
I let the towel fall and tied the robe closed tightly, adjusting it over my breasts. I pulled my wet hair out of the back of it and smoothed it out, looking down again to make sure that it was completely closed. I turned, and walked to him. I rested my hand on his shoulder and he tensed. "It's okay," I started, still slightly embarrassed. "You can look now."
He turned hesitantly. His face was still red. He blushed again as he saw me. "I'm sorry, Madonna. I didn't..."
I raised my hand to the side of his face and he stopped mid-sentence. His skin was hot to the touch. I smiled faintly. "It's alright. Really."
He didn't move. After a moment of awkward silence, I laughed quietly. "Let's try this again," I whispered. I slipped my arm around his neck, hugging him. "Hello, Leo."
Slowly, hesitantly, he rested a hand on my waist, just barely hugging me back. "Hi," he answered back, his voice quiet and unsure.
I pulled away from him and dropped my arms to my sides. "I don't usually see you at this time of the day," I pointed out. "Something wrong?"
He shook his head, relaxing a little. "No, nothing's wrong. Just needed to get out."
I smiled and took his hand. I took a few steps back until I was able to sit down on the bed. He lowered beside me, perched on the very edge of the mattres. "You look like you're ready to bolt at the drop of a hat," I informed him quietly.
He blinked, a surprised expresion crossing his face, then scooted back a little so that he was seated comfortably on top of my blankets. I moved back, curling my legs under me and situating the robe so that they were covered. "That's better," I smiled at him. "So how are you doing?"
LEONARDO:
"Can you feel that?"
I opened my eyes and looked down, using my hands to raise my head off the mattress in a half sit-up. I watched her fingers for a moment as her nails traced down over my chest. "Not really," I answered. "Not when you do it so light."
She rested her hand on my plastron, pressing gently with the pads of her fingers. "Feel that?" she tried again.
I nodded. "Pressure, vibration, and temperature, I can feel. I guess it might be compared to what you feel through a shirt."
She fingered lighly down the center groove about half way down, then came back up slowly. "So tell me about your family."
"Mmm, you first," I bargained. She'd made it a point to avoid questions about where she was from and what her family was like.
She hesitated for a long moment. "What do you want to know?" she finally asked.
I laughed. "Anything you'd tell me."
She smiled as she pulled her hand back and turned onto her stomach, propping herself up on her elbows. "Quip pro quo," she offered.
Now it was my turn to hesitate. I considered that carefully before nodding in agreement. "Okay. Do you have parents?"
"Everyone has parents," she laughed.
I grinned. "I don't."
She studied me for a moment, not sure how to take that. "I have a father," she finally answered. "My mother's dead."
"How did she die?"
"I don't know. I was young."
"So your father raised you?"
She nodded. "Pretty much, yeah."
"Brothers or sisters?" I pried.
"Just Kat. She's my half sister."
"From your mother or father?"
"Mother."
There was a moment of silence. I let her ask a few questions. "What about your family?" she asked.
"What about them?"
She laughed quietly. "Who are they? I mean, I know you've talked about brothers and a sensei, but..."
I nodded slightly. "I've got three brothers. All presumably my age. We can't really know because before the mutation, who knows how long we were around. Master Splinter found us, raised us... He's about as much of a father figure as anyone would expect to have."
She smiled. "Are you all really close?"
I considered that for a moment. "We... used to be. I don't know. Lately Raphael and I have really grown apart. We used to be pretty close friends, even though we got on each other's nerves a lot. But now it's just... He does stuff I don't agree with and we fight all the time." She nodded, understanding. "But as much as I hate him, I know I love him more. Even if I hate to admit it sometimes, I know I'd die for him. For any of my family."
She stared down at the pillow under her forearms. "There aren't a lot of things I can say I would die for," she informed.
I shrugged. "Well, not all people have that kind of committment."
She laughed quietly, almost sadly. "Oh, no, it's not that. It's just... there's so few people that I love like that. So few things that I value."
She had my interest piqued. "Like what?" I asked.
Her eyes raised to mine. "What do you mean?"
"What things do you value? What things would you die for?"
She sighed. "I don't know," she mumbled. "I guess we really can't tell what we'd do until we actually get in that situation."
That wasn't the answer I was looking for, and a quick exchange of glances told her that. She laughed quietly and crossed her arms, laying her head down on them. "I think... I would die for Kat. I owe so much to her..." I half expected that answer, from the way she talked about her best friend. "And for my honor."
That statement, I hadn't been fully prepared for. Not many Westerners understood the true concept of honor, and certainly not to the extent that they would be willing to die for it. I had to wonder if she knew what she was saying. "What do you mean?"
She raised her eyes briefly to mine and smiled slightly. "I was raised to value my honor," she whispered. "It's the only thing I have, really. Everything else is... worthless."
I turned onto my side to face her and she recoiled, moving away. I took her shoulder and pulled her back toward me slightly, then down to the mattress, lying her on her stomach again. She watched me closely, her eyes filled with a look closely resembling fear. "Why do you say that?" I asked as I scratched her back through the robe.
"Say what?" she asked, relaxing as she realized what I was doing.
"That everything aside from your honor is worthless. What's everything?"
She sighed and turned her head away. "All those other things that people put so much value on. Things I don't have."
"Like what?" I pried.
"Purity, innocence, strength, love..." she named, exhaling deeply.
"Beauty?" I offered, cutting her off. She'd better not deny that one. I'd seen people on talk shows that would kill for her looks.
She stopped short and was silent for a minute. "That's external. I don't care about that. And I'm not as beautiful as you think I am, Leo."
I decided not to argue with her. "So really, those other things are qualities you admire. Qualities you don't think you have."
"I guess so," she sighed. "I don't know."
"And why do you think that?"
I ran my hand up the center of her back and rested it on her shoulder, massaging gently. She tensed up tightly and I laughed. "Will you relax?" I pleaded. "I'm not going to hurt you."
Slowly, her muscles unclenched. For a moment, it was silent. I twisted my fingers in her hair as I rubbed at her shoulder and she turned to face me, pulling away slightly. I sighed inwardly and let her go. I was intimidating her, and I knew it. I didn't want to. So I backed off and brought my hand down to the center of her back.
I opened my mouth to say something but forgot what it was as the door flew open. I had no time to think, much less to move. "I can't believe he... Oh my God!"
The intruder screamed. In a flash, Madonna was on her feet. I was at the window, ready to bolt instinctively. "Kat, please!" Madonna struggled, resting a hand on her shoulder and raising the other to her lips. "Kat! Don't scream, it's okay!"
Kat fell silent. She stared at me with wide eyes, clutching her chest. Then, in one sudden movement, turned and shoved Madonna hard against the wall. "What the fuck are you thinking!" she screamed at her. She sprang at her and I rushed forward instinctively, stepping between the two of them. I saw too late that Kat had a knife in her hand. Better me than Madonna...
I caught her wrist and forced her arm up, lessening the strength of her blow toward me. It narrowly missed my shoulder on the way up, and I struck a nerve cluster inside her arm. She gasped in pain and the knife fell. I felt Madonna's hand on my shoulder, trying to pull me back. "No! Please!"
Kat struck forward with the heel of her free palm. She hit my plastron, but did very little damage. If I'd been human, the blow probably could've crippled me. I reached for that hand too, and narrowly avoided a kick before slamming her back against the wall and pinning her there. Her dark eyes blazed with an anger I had only ever seen come from Raphael. "Relax!" I ordered her sternly. "It's okay."
"It's not okay you fucking freak, let go of me!"
Sooner or later, I was going to have to let her go.
Madonna forced her way between us and I didn't fight her. "Stop it," she demanded. "Both of you just... stop!"
I felt Kat's eyes burn into me as I stepped back. "Leave now and I'll forget I saw you here," she growled. "But if you don't, I'm going to make you seriously wish I hadn't seen you."
"No," Madonna protested. She turned to me. "Stay. Please. I want you to stay."
I was more than ready to leave, but I didn't move. Madonna turned back to Kat. "Please..." she whispered.
Kat stared at her for a moment, then turned and spun out of the room, slamming the door behind her. Madonna cringed, then turned to me. "I'll... be right back," she promised.
I nodded slightly. "It's okay. Take your time."
She bit her lip as she turned and hurried out of the room.
KATARINA:
"Katarina!" The voice echoed down the hallway after me. "Kat, wait!"
I didn't wait. I kept walking at the same, quick pace. It took her a moment to catch me, her hand coming to rest on my shoulder. I spun, knocking her hand away. Her robe was slit almost to her navel from the running, and I could see she had nothing on underneath it. "Jesus Christ, Madonna, you're not even dressed and he's lying in your bed?" I cried. "What the hell are you thinking!"
She shook her head, clenching her robe closed again. "It's not like that, Katarina, I swear. He's just a friend."
I stared at her for a moment, dumbfounded, then turned and started down the hallway again. "Kat, wait!" she called. "Kat, where are you going?"
I spun and walked backward a few steps. "I'm going to get my father and whoever else he wants to bring with him and..."
"No!"
She was in front of me in an instant. Her hands gripped my shoulders and she pushed me back against the wall. I could've easily broken her grip, but I didn't. "No, please don't!" she begged in a hoarse whisper. "Please!"
"Give me one good reason," I demanded.
"Because he's a friend," she pleaded. "He's a good friend and I..."
"He's our family's enemy!" I reminded her. I couldn't believe I was hearing this.
"I know!" she cried frantically. At that instinct, something inside of her seemed to break. I saw tears pool in her eyes and she dropped her hands and her head. "I know that. But I don't care. That doesn't change the fact that all he's ever done to me is be a friend."
I stared at her long and hard. After a moment, she covered her face with her hands and turned, then slid down the wall to the floor. I watched her, unmoving, as she pulled her knees to her forehead and cried. God, I hated to see her cry. I was sure she didn't know it, but she could get me to sign my life away to stop her tears. I hesitated for a moment, then knelt down beside her, my hand on her shoulder. I didn't really know what to say to her. I still could hardly believe she'd been in a bed with my father's enemy.
"He's not what you think, Kiara," she sobbed, forgetting to use my changed name. She brushed her eyes roughly as she looked up. "He's more than just... the freak your father describes. And he's the only man who's ever in my life treated me with any kind of respect and I..."
"Woah, wait," I cut her off, moving back slightly. "You'd better not be falling for him."
Her eyes closed and she turned her head, bowing slightly. "I don't know, Kat. Right now, he's just a friend and that's probably all he'll ever be. But that doesn't change the truth."
"What truth, that you think he respects you?" I mocked.
She looked up and glared at me. "You tell me one other man in my whole life that would've kept his hands off me while I was lying in bed next to him."
"And he did?" I challenged.
"Yes, he did!"
I studied her for a moment, and immediately determined that she was not only telling the truth, but believing every word she said. She reached up and rested a hand on my shoulder. "Kat, when I talk to him... it's like I can really talk. Like I can talk with you, just not worrying about what you're gonna think or do because of something I say. I trust him. And he's one of the few friends that I have. Please..."
I sighed deeply and cut my eyes away. "Madonna, you're looking for trouble, you know that?"
"I know. And I know he'll kill me when he finds out. But I'm willing to take those consequences, Kat. I really am."
I glanced back at her. It took one brief glance into her eyes to read her sincerety. I shook my head slightly, in disbelief. "Madonna... I can't tell you what to do with your life," I realized.
"Please don't tell Shredder," she begged. "Please."
I considered that for a lingering moment, then sighed. "I won't," I relented. "But I won't cover for you, either. If you're gonna do this, it's without my help or consent. If he asks, I knew nothing about it."
She threw her arms around my neck and hugged me tightly. "Thank you," she breathed. "Thank you so much..."
