Day Nine- The Merge

The two teams are walking to the entrance of the golden pyramid, where Jeff is standing.

Jeff: Hi, survivors. As you know, today is the merge. Your new campsite is inside the pyramid, right next to the bottomless pit. Your camp's new name-

Alex: Hey, don't we get to make up our own name?

Jeff: No. Your camp's new name is-

Alex: That's not fair. I want to make up a name for our tribe.

Jeff: Well, you can't. As I was saying, your camp's new name is-

Alex: But...

Jeff: SHUT UP!!! You don't get to name your tribe! Just forget about it and let me talk! Your camp's new name is-

Rick: Hey, don't yell at my kid!

Imhotep: Shut up, he can yell at your brat if he wants to!

Evy: Brat?!

Anck-sunamun: You heard him, you b-

Jeff: SHUT UP!!! Everyone just shut up! All I want is to tell you your new camp's name, so just listen until you can go to your camp and kill each other there!

Alex: Jeez, don't spaz.

Jeff: Grrrrr. I might have to kill this kid. Anyway, your camp's new name is Diffen-dal. Now go set up your camp so I don't have to look at you anymore. Oh, and remember, you have a reward challenge this afternoon.

Alex: Why so soon?

Jeff: Because. Now shut up and go away.

The survivors set up their camp and get ready to leave for the reward challenge. They walk to the entrance of the pyramid, where Jeff is waiting for them.

Jeff: Today, you will run through a series of obstacles. The obstacles are pits of fire, mud, and stampeding camels. You must cross all the obstacles, and when you reach the end, you must ring a bell suspended over a pool of crocodiles. Ready?

Evy: Not really...

Jeff: Good, GO!

The survivors start running. All of them make it over the pit except for the Scorpion King, who is burned to a crisp. The remaining survivors start to cross the mud. Rick is going so fast that he slips and splatters mud all over everyone... including Jeff.

Jeff: AHHHHH!!!!!!! MY HAIR!!! MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!!! MUD, IN MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!!!!!!!! CALL MY HAIRDRESSER, CALL MY HAIRDRESSER!!!!

Jeff runs off, crying.

Meanwhile, everyone has crossed the mud, but Imhotep is way ahead of the other. They are coming up on the stampeding camels. Imhotep tries to run through the stampede, and is trampled by about 36 camels before crawling out. Rick tries jumping on the back of a camel, and is carried 50 feet before falling off. Evy rides up on a bicycle. She puts Alex in the basket attached to the handlebars. The theme song to E.T. starts playing. The bike floats off the ground and over the camel stampede. They land safely on the other side.

Alex: Whoa, mum, where did you learn to do that?

Evy: I've seen E.T. about a million times. Steven Spielberg is a genius.

Alex: Oh, Okay.

They both start running towards the pool with crocodiles in it. On a rope above the pool is a bell. Alex jumps towards the rope, but Evy grabs his ankle and throws him to the ground. Evy jumps on the rope and climbs to the top, where she rings the bell.

A skinny white guy walks towards Evy.

Skinny white guy: Hi, I'm Jeff's brother, Lester. I'm taking over for him while he gets his hair clean. Your reward is a hot meal cooked by the pygmies!

Evy: Oh boy.