Day Thirteen

Imhotep, Evy, Rick, and Lock-nah are the only ones left. They are still trying to recover from their disastrous visits with their families. Evy has been very cold towards Rick since her cousins left and refuses to speak to him.

Rick: C'mon, Evy, please forgive me! I'll...I'll...I'll hold my breath until you speak to me!

Rick starts holding his breath. Evy gives him a disgusted look.

Jeff walks up.

Jeff: Hi, survivors! I have some good news! You... what's wrong with him? (points at Rick, who is turning purple)

Lock-nah: a little marital dispute, I believe.

Jeff: Uhh...ok. Hey, does anyone wanna bet on how long he can stay that way?

Imhotep: I bet 2 minutes!

Lock-nah: a minute and 34 seconds!

Evy: What was your good news?

Jeff: My what? Oh, yeah, the news. You all have an immunity challenge, right now!

Imhotep: And this is good news because...?

Lock-nah: I do believe that Rick has fainted.

Later that day

Jeff leads the survivors into the desert, Rick pouting, Evy remaining aloof towards Rick. They stop in front of four small pillars about five feet tall.

Jeff: for this immunity challenge, you must each climb on a pillar and raise your arm above your head. If you lower your arm or fall off your pillar, you lose. Are you all ready?

The survivors climb onto their pillars and raise their hands.

Jeff: The time starts...now. Don't lower your arms. I'll just be over here, sitting in the shade, drinking martinis and watching you suffer in the blazing heat. Enjoy the challenge!

Lock-nah: How I wish I could kill him.

The noonday sun beats down on the survivors. They stand there in silence. If they stand there more than a couple of hours, they will get sunstroke.

Evy: My, this is tiring.

Imhotep: and boring.

Rick: hey, I know a way to pass the time! I'll list all the cards in my pokemon deck! I've got Pikachu and Squirtle and Bulbasaur and Charizard and...

Lock-nah: if the gods are merciful, they will kill me now.

An hour later...

Rick: and Meowth and Jigglypuff and Onix and...

Evy: ENOUGH! NO MORE OF THE DAMN POKEMON CARDS! I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

Rick: Evy! You're talking to me! You're talking to me! I knew you'd forgive me!

Evy: I don't forgive you, you dolt!

Rick: Give me a hug!

Evy: No!

Rick tries to hug Evy, but instead knocks her off balance. She falls sideways and right into Lock-Nah's sweaty armpit.

Rick: So that's it, is it? You were going behind my back with Lock-nah, huh?

Evy: what are you talking about?

Lock-nah: Huh?

Rick: Well, here's what I think of that!

Rick jumps off his pillar, draws his gun, and shoots Lock-nah.

Jeff (from a safe distance): ok, ok, that's enough. Since Evy fell off and Rick jumped off and Lock-nah is now dead, Imhotep wins.

Imhotep: Ha ha ha, you fools!

Jeff: I'll see you all...except for Lock-nah...at tribal council tonight.

Later that night...

The survivors head to tribal council.

Jeff: Welcome to tribal council! Tonight one of you will be voted off! You all know the drill, so get to it! Oh, and don't forget, Imhotep has immunity!

One-by-one, they go up and vote for who they want kicked off.

Imhotep: I vote for Evy.

Evy: I vote for Rick.

Rick: Evy.

Jeff: it appears that Evy, you are the weakest link. Goodbye.

Evy: What the hell?

Jeff: Just trying new material.

Evy: I think that's copyright infringement.

Jeff: Oh, well then, go away. Is that better.

Evy: Yeah, that's better.