LARVA: There's only one way to settle this....

ANNOUNCER: Pro-wrestling! That's right you lil' bloodthirsty vamps! Sorry, no fun intended! Ha ha! I crack myself up sometimes... Anyway, on with the show!

LARVA: (Huddled backstage in his cloak) Show? Is he f***ing crazy?

LARVA'S AGENT, MOLLY: (Bad American-Italian accent) Camawn, Larver, baby, $10 we get for this! $10! No dawg food for us tonight, ech? Labech!

LARVA: 'Labech'? You're Jewish now?

MOLLY: If I am, I get an extra 15% cut on your pay, kapeesh?

LARVA: (Patting her head from very high distance) Kapeesh, back to your roots, that's it... (She hands him a slice of pizza) Supoib, doll.

ANNOUNCER: In the blue corner we have the cutest guy to hit the pages of Anime! That's right girls! (Mutters) And a few boys... Get ready to rumble with... LARVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

LARVA: What is it with this 'Larverrrr?' My name is Lar-va, Lar-va!

MOLLY: Camawn, you're on! (Molly pushes him forward and his cloak snags on her heel. Larva is now naked, apart from a pair of y-fronts with a picture of a boxer dog on them.) I told him to wear the Boxer shorts! Aw, labech...

(Larva walks into the ring with Aerosmith playing 'Dude Looks Like A Lady'. The entire crowd starts to laugh at him.)

LARVA: Oh, yeah, I geddit. Very funny. Ha ha ha. See! I'M LAUGHING, YOU BESTERDS!

ANNOUNCER: (Coughs nervously) And in the red corner - she's a little minx -.

LARVA: She tried to sleep with me! Twice!

ANNOUNCER: - It's MIYUUUUUUUUUUUU!

(Miyu walks in to Britney Spears' 'Oops I Did It Again' with slightly different lyrics...)

MIYU: (Singing along) Oops I bit you again! I stopped your heart, got lost in the game, oh Larver, Larver.. (Larva mouths 'Lar-va, you bitch. Lar- va!') Look! Larva! Seeing as it's a special occasion, I'm wearing two ribbons! Look! (Miyu points to her feet)

LARVA: That makes me feel soooo much better at this pivotal point in our professional relationship.

MIYU: (Stroking her torso) Aw, c'mon, Larva. You know you want this.... You just don't know it yet.

ANNOUNCER: Now, we're agreed on the rules? (Both nod) Okay, just to remind you of the stakes. (Miyu shivers) Sorry. Okay, Larva, if you win, you are free of being Miyu's slave for eternity. Miyu, if you win, Larva is your slave for eternity and occasional (reading rules) l-o-v-e monkey. (Miyu licks her lips. Larva gives a high pitched squeak) If it's a draw, or if Miyu bites you during the fight, Larva, you are her slave for another two years and love monkey twice a month. Agreed? Good. LET'S RUMBLE!

(A bell sounds. Larva shakes a towel off his shoulders and pours Gatorade over his face. Miyu does the same except with water. A sizzling is heard.)

MIYU: It's holy water! You besterd! (Larva smirks and Miyu trips him up. Larva comes back by flying to the ceiling and coming back down with an elbow jab into Miyu's back.)

CREATOR OF MIYU (IN THE CROWD): Make that bitch your bitch, you besterd!

LARVA: Miyu, this is hurting me a lot more than it is you.

MIYU: Well then, stop it! Gettoffame!

LARVA: No, apparently it's hurting you more. So I'm gonna keep on going.

LEMURES (ALSO IN CROWD): (Mega sarcasm) Great come back line, Larva!

LARVA: (Missing the mega sarcasm) Oh, thanks mate! (Lemures slaps his forehead)

ANNOUNCER: 3, 2, and 1! And the winner is Larva! (Announcer pulls up Larva's hand with a very long broom)

LARVA: I won! I won! I'm free! I'm going to Disneyland!

MOLLY: I wouldn't get too cocky, Larver, schweetheart.

LARVA: Why, you've decided to be Jewish? (Sound of teeth sinking into flesh) Oh, Miyu you bitch! I was free! I was going to Disneyland! (Walking out of the building) Why did you bite me? Was it the love monkey side of things? Just two years I guess.

MIYU: Not quite. It's only two years longer if I bit you during the fight. And I didn't. NAR NAR NE NARNAR!

LARVA: Oh god, I guess I'll have to take you home unless you have a problem with motorcycles. (He helps her onto the Harley Davidson. Zooming along the motorway, Miyu starts to sing....)

MIYU: Oops, I bit ya again....

LARVA: Must... Resist.. Urge... To... Kill...