YOU REVIEWED! I'm so happy! Reviewers thanks at the end. I love you
people...
That you're reading this means that you want more. And for your enjoyment, I have randomly selected one character to give you the disclaimer. Mr. Smith, if you please.
Agent Smith: ............................................
Um, Mr. Smith?
Agent Smith: ............................................
I'll sic Reika on you.
Agent Smith: *in a deadpan sort of voice* Rage Aomori does not own the Matrix or anything even remotely related to it. All characters related to the Matrix are property to the honnored and revered Wachowski Brothers. Reika does not own the Twins nor Agent Smith, althoguh she wishes she did. *blinks at cue cards* *edges away*
Darn right we don't own anything! *sniff*
Extreme OOCness involved. Idiocy. Character bashing. Twin and Agent glomping. You get the picture. Spoilers ahoy!
Reika: *squee*
Chapter Two for you. Enjoy. Or implode.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was nearing noon, the sun rising to it's scorching zenith, deep-frying the many, crowded people in the streets of the city below. Of course, being human, they didn't mind. Not really. The occasional curse and weather complaint drifted out from the roiling, colorful cotton mass, quickly swallowed up by the towering skyscrapers gleaming in the sun above. Main Street. A hustling bustling center, a core, of usually all cities. The metropolis of shops and stores where you may not find anything else elsewhere: Clothing, food, insurance, real estate, oddities, tidbits, cosmetics, coffee, tea, toys, oxygen, books, facials, overly expensive hair- dos... all that one could dream of. Cafes were quite popular. It was in one of these that the people, much like the ones by the hot-dog stand earlier, ignored the three dark-suited men seated about a small, shiny, black table, steaming mugs clutched in their virtually similat hands.
Agent Johnson: So. How was your day? *sips delicately at tea*
Agent Thompson: Quite well, thank you. Yours?
Agent Jackson: I'm very fine today...
Agent Johnson: Such a lovely day today, isn't it?
Agent Thompson: Very lovely indeed.
Agent Jackson: Yes. Very lovely. Say. Why don't we go for a stroll in the park after this?
Agent Johnson: Why not? It's lovely out enough.
Agent Thompson: Then after that we can get some ice cream!
Agent Jackson: Yes! That's a perfect idea! Let's finish, shall we?
Agent Johnson: Yes. Let's... *blinks* Oh, bother...
Agent Thompson: The Rebels have returned.
Agent Jackson: Damn them. And on a day like this...
Agent Johnson: It's our priority. They are only human, after all.
Agent Thompson: *sighs* Oh well... it was a nice plan, anyhow... anybe after we're finished with them?
Agent Jackson: Sounds good. Let's go.
Agents: *rise from the table and leave in an orderly manner*
MEANWHILE, two blocks away, on the twelfth floor of an office building...
Neo: *hides behind cabinet* *clutches chest, gasping frantically for breath* Dear God!
P.A.P: *prowls around cubicles and desks* Come out, come out, wherever you are...
Neo: *shudders* Mommy... will this ever end... *looks around* *sees Emergency Fire Escape Stairwell Door* Ah Ha!
P.A.P: I can hear your breath. I can smell your fear...
Neo: *gulps* *blinks* Hey.... Waitaminute! I'm the One! I'm destined to save the Matrix and Zion from destruction! I cannot be found cowering behind here like a... a... coward! I AM DA ONE! *stands up abruptly*
P.A.P: AAAAAGGHHH!!! *falls over* *begins coughing uncontrollably*
Neo: *not noticing anything* I WILL NOT BE DEFEATED! YOU CANNOT SCARE ME! I. AM. DA. ONE!!! *holds up clenched fist superhero style* I AM INVINCIBLE!
P.A.P: *regains breath* Let's test that theory, shall we? *leaps*
Neo: MEEP! *runs for Emergency Fire Escape Stairwell Door*
P.A.P: SUFFER!!!
MEANWHILE, two floors down...
Trinity: *gasps for breath, clutching side* Why... couldn't... we... take... the ... bloody... elevator?
Morpheus: *pumping up the stairs with apparent ease* It does not add to our coolness.
Trinity: Ah. Right. WHY did I have to wear BLACK latex? *continues on*
Morpheus: You're getting lazy, Trin. We must be fit in order to keep up our cool composure.
Trinity: R-right... *gasps* *attempts to keep up*
Neo: *crashes through Emergency Fire Escape Stairwell Door just as Morpheus and Trinity reach the landing*
Morpheus: *gets hit by flying door. Full force. In the face* Ow.
Trinity: O_O YEEK!
Neo: *crashes into Trinity* AGH!
Neo&Trinity: *proceed to tumble ungracefully down twelve flights of stairs*
P.A.P: *steps onto the landing* *looks around* Er... hello? Where'd everyone go?
Morpheus: *sticks very disheveled arm out from behind door and points* *muffled* I think they fell down the stairs...
Neo&Trinity: Ow *thud* Ow! *thud* Ow! *thud* Ow! *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thuds gradualy begin to grow fainter*
P.A.P: Oh. *heads back into the office* *makes a beeline for the coffee- maker*
Morpheus: @_@
MEANWHILE, in the building across the street, sitting in a very posh-ish restaurant...
Merovingian: What IS that? It's coming from the vents...
Persephone: Sounds too big to be vermin.
Henchman 2: Does that sound like giggling?
Henchman 1: It keeps coming from over there. *points at spot above the Twins heads*
Twins: *blink* *look up*
Merovingian: *glares* You didn't put something up there again, did you? The last thing I need is another body falling into my dessert.
Twin #1: We didn't know where to put it!
Twin #2: It wouldn't fit into the trash...
Merovingian: *grimaces* Just... don't do it again, yes?
Twins: ^_^
Persephone: *listens* You're right... there's something giggling up there.
Henchman 2: *sniffs* What's that smell?
Henchwoman: Smells like... custard!
Henchman 3: I'm hungry.
Merovingian: *reaches for pie* Nonsense! I have the only custard pie in this place... Hey! *looks around frantically* My pie!
Persephone: AAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All: *scramble around either go to Persephone's aid or find a place to hide*
Henchwoman: See? I told you! Custard! *points at Persephone, who was gurgling in furious misery at the mass of gooey, custardy goodness splattered over her head and upper body*
Persephone: My hair! My beautifully expensive sculptured hair!
Merovingian: My custard! My beautifully gooey tasty custard! *sob*
Henchmen: *dash to their masters aid, attempting to ignore the Twins, who were busy rolling on the floor, virtually crying in mirth, clutching their sides helplessly*
Persephone: Be quiet! You there! Get me a towel! Mero! Rewrite this now!
Merovingian: *doesn't hear a thing* My poor, poor pie... so short a life, and so tragic an ending! Forgive me for not loving you as I should have loved you... *begins babbling in rapid French*
Persephone: *slaps him upside the head with rubber duckie*
Merovingian: Ow.
Guard: *bursts in* *extremely dishevelled, singed, bruised, and foot-print riddled* MY RUBBER DUCKIE!!! *dashes to the table*
Persephone: *stares* Where'd this come from?
Guard: *snatches up rubber duckie* Mine! ^_^ *dashes out*
Twin #1: *attempting valiantly to stay on feet while helping Twin #2 stand up*
Twin #2: *collapses in mirth, taking Twin #1 down as well*
Merovingian: Hopeless... *sighs sadly* My poor custard...
Persephone: Oh, shut up! Rewrite this!
Merovingian: Yes, dear...
In the street below... (the word 'MEANWHILE' was getting on my nerves...)
Neo&Trinity: *come tumbling out from the fire escape stairwell, scattering people everywhere like colorful bowling pins, complete with sound effects* *land at the Oracle's feet*
Oracle: *looks down* Oh, hello dears! ^_^
Neo: *gagging* Hi...
Trinity: *has Neo in a headlock*
Neo: @_@
Oracle: How are you today?
Neo: *in a very choked, squeaky sort of voice* Fine, thank you...
Oracle: That's good.
Trinity: You change the combination on my undies drawer and then you decide to bring me along on your ride down the bloody stairs! What kind of lover are you?
Neo: *in that same choked, squeaky sort of voice* I assure you, it won't happen again! I can't breathe very well, by the way...
Trinity: Are you sorry?
Neo: Eternally!
Trinity: *mollified* All right then. *gets up off of Neo*
Neo: *gasps* Dear God... I saw my life flash before my eyes... I never knew I dressed in drag...
Trinity: I'll ignore that.
Oracle: *digs in purse* Candy?
Neo: Candy! Yay! ^_^
Trinity: -_-' I'd better go check on Morpheus... *traipses off into the building*
Oracle: So...
Neo: So...
Oracle: Nice day, isn't it?
Neo:...................
Seraph: *comes dashing from out of nowhere* Oracle! *steps on Neo, who was still on the ground*
Neo: YURK! *is stepped on*
Oracle: Oh, hello there. ^_^
Seraph: Please don't go wandering off like that...
Oracle: Very well. Come along, then!
Seraph: *grabs Neo by the foot and proceeds to drag him after the Oracle*
Neo: @_@ *dragged*
Oracle: Here we are! *points at pink door*
Seraph: *lets go on Neo* *Whips out shiny key and opens the door, not into the fuzzy pink room within, but into an eternal corridor of white with green doors* After you. *bows courtiously*
Oracle: Such a good boy... *proceeds*
Seraph: *resumes dragging Neo after the Oracle* *manages to get Neo stuck in the door* Whoops...
Neo: Owie... *stuck between the door*
A few doors away...
Trinity: *steps out onto the sidewalk* Where did they go?
Morpheus: *looking oddly flattened* Hmm... he was with the Oracle, you say?
Trinity: Yeah. She gave him candy. *pouts* She didn't give me any...
Morpheus: I can see why.
Trinity: Let's jack out. My hair gel's melting again. It's getting in my eyes.
Morpheus: I thought you used lard...
Trinity: SHHHHH!!! Peopel will HEAR you! *looks around shiftily*
Morpheus: ........... okay, then... *whips out cell phone* Link? Get us out of here. And no bathroom breaks this time...
Link: Alrighty then! Look around for a pink door. Inside is a fuzzy pink room. Closest possible hardline...
Morpheus: ................................... Alright then *breaks connection*................................
Trinity: Let's go! *marches off*
Morpheus: I don't like pink... *follows*
In a strange little park...
Neo: *sitting on a bench, ignoring the imprint of a door and wall on his chest*
Oracle: So. Do you knwo why you're here?
Neo: Um... Candy?
Oracle:....................
Neo: *blinks* *thinks hard* A purpose?
Oracle: Very bright, aren't you?
Neo: Yup!
Oracle: Do you know anything about exiled programs?
Neo: Nope.
Oracle: You do. You hear about them all the time.
Neo: I do? Wow...
Oracle: You know all those stories about ghosts, and angels? Of werewolves and vampires?
Neo: Yeeeeaaaahhh.....
Oracle: Those are caused by.... er.... something...
Seraph: By the Matrix assimilating something not needed.
Oracle: Ah! Yes! Something like that. ^_^
Neo: Okay then...
Oracle: Have another candy.
Neo: I feel I must be hesitant and questioning. You know I'm gonna take that, don't you?
Oracle: I wouldn't be very much of an Oracle if I didn't, now would I?
Neo:............................................
Oracle: It's all a matter of... something.
Neo: Choice?
Oracle: Yes! Choice! Exactly!
Neo: So.... the problem of all is choice?
Oracle: Yes! Good boy! *pats him on the head*
Neo: ^_^
Oracle: ^_^
Neo: You know, I can't help but feel that you're not human. Neither is he. *nods at Seraph*
Oracle: Ping! On the dot!
Neo: Sooo.... what are you then? Programs?
Oracle: Bingo!
Neo: I'm talkin' to a program of the Matrix... you're gonna kill me!
Oracle: There's no way I can say I'm not. No way I can make you know you can trust me.
Neo: *inches away, almost off the bench*
Oracle: See them birds? *nods at crows* There's a program made to watch them, and the air, and the sky...
Neo: There's a program for everything?
Oracle: Virtually. But there are programs who decide to go into exile instead of being deleted.
Neo: *like a little kid* Why do they get deleted?
Oracle: Because they aren't needed anymore. either that, or they've made someone mad...
Neo: Ah.
Oracle: And not all exiles are nice... like vampires, for instance... nasty little blood suckers, they are. Make nice bonfires at dawn, though.
Neo: ......................................................
Oracle: Best place to go if you want to keep Zion safe is to the maker of the Matrix. The core if it all!
Neo: Where is this core?
Oracle: Somewhere. I forget.
Neo: Ah. I'll have to find out for myself, eh?
Oracle: Yup. And you'll be needing one of those Exiled programs to help get to the source.
Neo: Ooohhh... Whozzat?
Oracle: You'll need the KeyMaker... *rummages in bag*
Neo: KeyMaker?
Oracle: Uh Huh... *sticks head in bag* disappeared a while ago. No idea where he went, though... never left a number or anything... *muffled* The Merovingian's got 'im, I think. I suppose that's why we can't find 'im... Ah Ha! *pulls out pink key and piece of paper* Here you go. *hands Neo the paper* *pockets the key*
Neo: Merovingian? *stares at the paper*
Oracle: An old program. Very old. And dangerous, oh yes... *gets dark look* Old geezer... make fun of MY baking, will you? I've never seen you pick up a wooden spoon...
Seraph: Um, Oracle? It's time.
Oracle: Be a good little boy, yes? *pats Neo on the head and toddles after Seraph*
Seraph: *holds open door* *places rock to hold it open*
Neo: Am I supposed to go too?
Seraph: No. I forgot something.
Neo: What?
Seraph: This. *performs a flying kick to Neo's head*
Neo: O_O AAAIIEE!!! *ducks*
Seraph: *proceeds to beat the peripheral crap out of Neo*
Neo: *attempts to keep from getting the peripheral crap beaten out of him* MOMMY!
Seraph: *stops* *bows* *dashes through the door*
Neo: *lies on the ground, gasping for breath* Today is not my day...
Very Familiar Voice: Apparently not.
Neo: *freezes* *looks towards the source of the voice* Eh?
Agent Smith: Nice to see you again, Mr. Anderson.
Neo: *twitches*
Agent Smith: *smiles in that Agent Smith-y sort of way* I have to thank you for freeing me.
Neo: Ah... yeah. I got your package.
Agent Smith: Good.
Neo: *climbs to feet* So... how did you come to be standing here in front of me?
Agent Smith: I don't know... something overwritten? Copied? Doesn't matter... *smiles again*
Neo: Uh huh... *inches away*
Agent Smith: Funny thing, Mr. Anderson. Funny indeed. I have no idea how it happened, but I'm quite sure I killed you. *glares* I watched you die! And yet, here you are, standing in front of me, apparently healthy, well...
Neo: Shows what you know...
Agent Smith: Hush, you! *clears throat* But, now that I'm apparently free, like you, I have one little thing I must do...
Neo: Go to the bathroom?
Agent smith: *ignores* You see, there's one thing out there for me...
Neo: And what's that? *edging towards the exit*
Agent Smith: It's purpose, Mr,. Anderson. Purpose.
Neo: Ah... interesting...
Agent Smith: You see, it's purpose that drives us.
Smith 2: Purpose that binds us.
Smith 3: Purpose that holds us.
Neo: *blinks* *surrounded by a dozen Agent Smiths* Damn.
Agent Smith: One of our purposes is to take your purpose, and make it our own...
Neo: *trembles* *snaps* WHY IS THE WORLD AGAINST ME?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yes. That is the end of this chapter. Too bad for you.
MoUsE4eVa: You'll see where it goes soon enough. Oh, you'll see... mwuhahaha...
MoRbId ChIlD: I'll try... hmm... albino jamacians... interesting concept.
Bagheera: I thank you for your review. It joys us to read such a thing.
Audrey A: Oh, don't worry. Persephone's Kiss ain't gonna get as far as that, even... *cackles madly*
Sorrow Reminisce: Yes. This is a random story thingie with lotsa character bashings. Can you tell who's getting the brunt of the attack here? The little O_O's and ^_^'s are just a way of showing stupidity and randomness.
Pat O' Cake: Trin's undies drawer gets a cameo. Do not worry. Mushrooms, eh? Hmm...
Kat: The Twins get into a hellovalota mischief, I assure you. Under the influence of Reika, sadly...
Reika: Hey!
Stormhawk: Insane? Moi? Hah! *wards off men in white coats*
Oddwen: Agent Smith hath arrived!
HellFighter: Back, creature! Back! Twins are ours! *glomps recaptured Twins* Everything in here is completely OOC. Except us.
pyromaniac firework: Thanks to you, I have something to torture Trin with now. Lard... Behehehehehe...
CHAPTER 3 SOON TO COME! Gimme more reviews and I'll get it to you as fast as I am allowed.
That you're reading this means that you want more. And for your enjoyment, I have randomly selected one character to give you the disclaimer. Mr. Smith, if you please.
Agent Smith: ............................................
Um, Mr. Smith?
Agent Smith: ............................................
I'll sic Reika on you.
Agent Smith: *in a deadpan sort of voice* Rage Aomori does not own the Matrix or anything even remotely related to it. All characters related to the Matrix are property to the honnored and revered Wachowski Brothers. Reika does not own the Twins nor Agent Smith, althoguh she wishes she did. *blinks at cue cards* *edges away*
Darn right we don't own anything! *sniff*
Extreme OOCness involved. Idiocy. Character bashing. Twin and Agent glomping. You get the picture. Spoilers ahoy!
Reika: *squee*
Chapter Two for you. Enjoy. Or implode.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was nearing noon, the sun rising to it's scorching zenith, deep-frying the many, crowded people in the streets of the city below. Of course, being human, they didn't mind. Not really. The occasional curse and weather complaint drifted out from the roiling, colorful cotton mass, quickly swallowed up by the towering skyscrapers gleaming in the sun above. Main Street. A hustling bustling center, a core, of usually all cities. The metropolis of shops and stores where you may not find anything else elsewhere: Clothing, food, insurance, real estate, oddities, tidbits, cosmetics, coffee, tea, toys, oxygen, books, facials, overly expensive hair- dos... all that one could dream of. Cafes were quite popular. It was in one of these that the people, much like the ones by the hot-dog stand earlier, ignored the three dark-suited men seated about a small, shiny, black table, steaming mugs clutched in their virtually similat hands.
Agent Johnson: So. How was your day? *sips delicately at tea*
Agent Thompson: Quite well, thank you. Yours?
Agent Jackson: I'm very fine today...
Agent Johnson: Such a lovely day today, isn't it?
Agent Thompson: Very lovely indeed.
Agent Jackson: Yes. Very lovely. Say. Why don't we go for a stroll in the park after this?
Agent Johnson: Why not? It's lovely out enough.
Agent Thompson: Then after that we can get some ice cream!
Agent Jackson: Yes! That's a perfect idea! Let's finish, shall we?
Agent Johnson: Yes. Let's... *blinks* Oh, bother...
Agent Thompson: The Rebels have returned.
Agent Jackson: Damn them. And on a day like this...
Agent Johnson: It's our priority. They are only human, after all.
Agent Thompson: *sighs* Oh well... it was a nice plan, anyhow... anybe after we're finished with them?
Agent Jackson: Sounds good. Let's go.
Agents: *rise from the table and leave in an orderly manner*
MEANWHILE, two blocks away, on the twelfth floor of an office building...
Neo: *hides behind cabinet* *clutches chest, gasping frantically for breath* Dear God!
P.A.P: *prowls around cubicles and desks* Come out, come out, wherever you are...
Neo: *shudders* Mommy... will this ever end... *looks around* *sees Emergency Fire Escape Stairwell Door* Ah Ha!
P.A.P: I can hear your breath. I can smell your fear...
Neo: *gulps* *blinks* Hey.... Waitaminute! I'm the One! I'm destined to save the Matrix and Zion from destruction! I cannot be found cowering behind here like a... a... coward! I AM DA ONE! *stands up abruptly*
P.A.P: AAAAAGGHHH!!! *falls over* *begins coughing uncontrollably*
Neo: *not noticing anything* I WILL NOT BE DEFEATED! YOU CANNOT SCARE ME! I. AM. DA. ONE!!! *holds up clenched fist superhero style* I AM INVINCIBLE!
P.A.P: *regains breath* Let's test that theory, shall we? *leaps*
Neo: MEEP! *runs for Emergency Fire Escape Stairwell Door*
P.A.P: SUFFER!!!
MEANWHILE, two floors down...
Trinity: *gasps for breath, clutching side* Why... couldn't... we... take... the ... bloody... elevator?
Morpheus: *pumping up the stairs with apparent ease* It does not add to our coolness.
Trinity: Ah. Right. WHY did I have to wear BLACK latex? *continues on*
Morpheus: You're getting lazy, Trin. We must be fit in order to keep up our cool composure.
Trinity: R-right... *gasps* *attempts to keep up*
Neo: *crashes through Emergency Fire Escape Stairwell Door just as Morpheus and Trinity reach the landing*
Morpheus: *gets hit by flying door. Full force. In the face* Ow.
Trinity: O_O YEEK!
Neo: *crashes into Trinity* AGH!
Neo&Trinity: *proceed to tumble ungracefully down twelve flights of stairs*
P.A.P: *steps onto the landing* *looks around* Er... hello? Where'd everyone go?
Morpheus: *sticks very disheveled arm out from behind door and points* *muffled* I think they fell down the stairs...
Neo&Trinity: Ow *thud* Ow! *thud* Ow! *thud* Ow! *thud* *thud* *thud* *thud* *thuds gradualy begin to grow fainter*
P.A.P: Oh. *heads back into the office* *makes a beeline for the coffee- maker*
Morpheus: @_@
MEANWHILE, in the building across the street, sitting in a very posh-ish restaurant...
Merovingian: What IS that? It's coming from the vents...
Persephone: Sounds too big to be vermin.
Henchman 2: Does that sound like giggling?
Henchman 1: It keeps coming from over there. *points at spot above the Twins heads*
Twins: *blink* *look up*
Merovingian: *glares* You didn't put something up there again, did you? The last thing I need is another body falling into my dessert.
Twin #1: We didn't know where to put it!
Twin #2: It wouldn't fit into the trash...
Merovingian: *grimaces* Just... don't do it again, yes?
Twins: ^_^
Persephone: *listens* You're right... there's something giggling up there.
Henchman 2: *sniffs* What's that smell?
Henchwoman: Smells like... custard!
Henchman 3: I'm hungry.
Merovingian: *reaches for pie* Nonsense! I have the only custard pie in this place... Hey! *looks around frantically* My pie!
Persephone: AAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All: *scramble around either go to Persephone's aid or find a place to hide*
Henchwoman: See? I told you! Custard! *points at Persephone, who was gurgling in furious misery at the mass of gooey, custardy goodness splattered over her head and upper body*
Persephone: My hair! My beautifully expensive sculptured hair!
Merovingian: My custard! My beautifully gooey tasty custard! *sob*
Henchmen: *dash to their masters aid, attempting to ignore the Twins, who were busy rolling on the floor, virtually crying in mirth, clutching their sides helplessly*
Persephone: Be quiet! You there! Get me a towel! Mero! Rewrite this now!
Merovingian: *doesn't hear a thing* My poor, poor pie... so short a life, and so tragic an ending! Forgive me for not loving you as I should have loved you... *begins babbling in rapid French*
Persephone: *slaps him upside the head with rubber duckie*
Merovingian: Ow.
Guard: *bursts in* *extremely dishevelled, singed, bruised, and foot-print riddled* MY RUBBER DUCKIE!!! *dashes to the table*
Persephone: *stares* Where'd this come from?
Guard: *snatches up rubber duckie* Mine! ^_^ *dashes out*
Twin #1: *attempting valiantly to stay on feet while helping Twin #2 stand up*
Twin #2: *collapses in mirth, taking Twin #1 down as well*
Merovingian: Hopeless... *sighs sadly* My poor custard...
Persephone: Oh, shut up! Rewrite this!
Merovingian: Yes, dear...
In the street below... (the word 'MEANWHILE' was getting on my nerves...)
Neo&Trinity: *come tumbling out from the fire escape stairwell, scattering people everywhere like colorful bowling pins, complete with sound effects* *land at the Oracle's feet*
Oracle: *looks down* Oh, hello dears! ^_^
Neo: *gagging* Hi...
Trinity: *has Neo in a headlock*
Neo: @_@
Oracle: How are you today?
Neo: *in a very choked, squeaky sort of voice* Fine, thank you...
Oracle: That's good.
Trinity: You change the combination on my undies drawer and then you decide to bring me along on your ride down the bloody stairs! What kind of lover are you?
Neo: *in that same choked, squeaky sort of voice* I assure you, it won't happen again! I can't breathe very well, by the way...
Trinity: Are you sorry?
Neo: Eternally!
Trinity: *mollified* All right then. *gets up off of Neo*
Neo: *gasps* Dear God... I saw my life flash before my eyes... I never knew I dressed in drag...
Trinity: I'll ignore that.
Oracle: *digs in purse* Candy?
Neo: Candy! Yay! ^_^
Trinity: -_-' I'd better go check on Morpheus... *traipses off into the building*
Oracle: So...
Neo: So...
Oracle: Nice day, isn't it?
Neo:...................
Seraph: *comes dashing from out of nowhere* Oracle! *steps on Neo, who was still on the ground*
Neo: YURK! *is stepped on*
Oracle: Oh, hello there. ^_^
Seraph: Please don't go wandering off like that...
Oracle: Very well. Come along, then!
Seraph: *grabs Neo by the foot and proceeds to drag him after the Oracle*
Neo: @_@ *dragged*
Oracle: Here we are! *points at pink door*
Seraph: *lets go on Neo* *Whips out shiny key and opens the door, not into the fuzzy pink room within, but into an eternal corridor of white with green doors* After you. *bows courtiously*
Oracle: Such a good boy... *proceeds*
Seraph: *resumes dragging Neo after the Oracle* *manages to get Neo stuck in the door* Whoops...
Neo: Owie... *stuck between the door*
A few doors away...
Trinity: *steps out onto the sidewalk* Where did they go?
Morpheus: *looking oddly flattened* Hmm... he was with the Oracle, you say?
Trinity: Yeah. She gave him candy. *pouts* She didn't give me any...
Morpheus: I can see why.
Trinity: Let's jack out. My hair gel's melting again. It's getting in my eyes.
Morpheus: I thought you used lard...
Trinity: SHHHHH!!! Peopel will HEAR you! *looks around shiftily*
Morpheus: ........... okay, then... *whips out cell phone* Link? Get us out of here. And no bathroom breaks this time...
Link: Alrighty then! Look around for a pink door. Inside is a fuzzy pink room. Closest possible hardline...
Morpheus: ................................... Alright then *breaks connection*................................
Trinity: Let's go! *marches off*
Morpheus: I don't like pink... *follows*
In a strange little park...
Neo: *sitting on a bench, ignoring the imprint of a door and wall on his chest*
Oracle: So. Do you knwo why you're here?
Neo: Um... Candy?
Oracle:....................
Neo: *blinks* *thinks hard* A purpose?
Oracle: Very bright, aren't you?
Neo: Yup!
Oracle: Do you know anything about exiled programs?
Neo: Nope.
Oracle: You do. You hear about them all the time.
Neo: I do? Wow...
Oracle: You know all those stories about ghosts, and angels? Of werewolves and vampires?
Neo: Yeeeeaaaahhh.....
Oracle: Those are caused by.... er.... something...
Seraph: By the Matrix assimilating something not needed.
Oracle: Ah! Yes! Something like that. ^_^
Neo: Okay then...
Oracle: Have another candy.
Neo: I feel I must be hesitant and questioning. You know I'm gonna take that, don't you?
Oracle: I wouldn't be very much of an Oracle if I didn't, now would I?
Neo:............................................
Oracle: It's all a matter of... something.
Neo: Choice?
Oracle: Yes! Choice! Exactly!
Neo: So.... the problem of all is choice?
Oracle: Yes! Good boy! *pats him on the head*
Neo: ^_^
Oracle: ^_^
Neo: You know, I can't help but feel that you're not human. Neither is he. *nods at Seraph*
Oracle: Ping! On the dot!
Neo: Sooo.... what are you then? Programs?
Oracle: Bingo!
Neo: I'm talkin' to a program of the Matrix... you're gonna kill me!
Oracle: There's no way I can say I'm not. No way I can make you know you can trust me.
Neo: *inches away, almost off the bench*
Oracle: See them birds? *nods at crows* There's a program made to watch them, and the air, and the sky...
Neo: There's a program for everything?
Oracle: Virtually. But there are programs who decide to go into exile instead of being deleted.
Neo: *like a little kid* Why do they get deleted?
Oracle: Because they aren't needed anymore. either that, or they've made someone mad...
Neo: Ah.
Oracle: And not all exiles are nice... like vampires, for instance... nasty little blood suckers, they are. Make nice bonfires at dawn, though.
Neo: ......................................................
Oracle: Best place to go if you want to keep Zion safe is to the maker of the Matrix. The core if it all!
Neo: Where is this core?
Oracle: Somewhere. I forget.
Neo: Ah. I'll have to find out for myself, eh?
Oracle: Yup. And you'll be needing one of those Exiled programs to help get to the source.
Neo: Ooohhh... Whozzat?
Oracle: You'll need the KeyMaker... *rummages in bag*
Neo: KeyMaker?
Oracle: Uh Huh... *sticks head in bag* disappeared a while ago. No idea where he went, though... never left a number or anything... *muffled* The Merovingian's got 'im, I think. I suppose that's why we can't find 'im... Ah Ha! *pulls out pink key and piece of paper* Here you go. *hands Neo the paper* *pockets the key*
Neo: Merovingian? *stares at the paper*
Oracle: An old program. Very old. And dangerous, oh yes... *gets dark look* Old geezer... make fun of MY baking, will you? I've never seen you pick up a wooden spoon...
Seraph: Um, Oracle? It's time.
Oracle: Be a good little boy, yes? *pats Neo on the head and toddles after Seraph*
Seraph: *holds open door* *places rock to hold it open*
Neo: Am I supposed to go too?
Seraph: No. I forgot something.
Neo: What?
Seraph: This. *performs a flying kick to Neo's head*
Neo: O_O AAAIIEE!!! *ducks*
Seraph: *proceeds to beat the peripheral crap out of Neo*
Neo: *attempts to keep from getting the peripheral crap beaten out of him* MOMMY!
Seraph: *stops* *bows* *dashes through the door*
Neo: *lies on the ground, gasping for breath* Today is not my day...
Very Familiar Voice: Apparently not.
Neo: *freezes* *looks towards the source of the voice* Eh?
Agent Smith: Nice to see you again, Mr. Anderson.
Neo: *twitches*
Agent Smith: *smiles in that Agent Smith-y sort of way* I have to thank you for freeing me.
Neo: Ah... yeah. I got your package.
Agent Smith: Good.
Neo: *climbs to feet* So... how did you come to be standing here in front of me?
Agent Smith: I don't know... something overwritten? Copied? Doesn't matter... *smiles again*
Neo: Uh huh... *inches away*
Agent Smith: Funny thing, Mr. Anderson. Funny indeed. I have no idea how it happened, but I'm quite sure I killed you. *glares* I watched you die! And yet, here you are, standing in front of me, apparently healthy, well...
Neo: Shows what you know...
Agent Smith: Hush, you! *clears throat* But, now that I'm apparently free, like you, I have one little thing I must do...
Neo: Go to the bathroom?
Agent smith: *ignores* You see, there's one thing out there for me...
Neo: And what's that? *edging towards the exit*
Agent Smith: It's purpose, Mr,. Anderson. Purpose.
Neo: Ah... interesting...
Agent Smith: You see, it's purpose that drives us.
Smith 2: Purpose that binds us.
Smith 3: Purpose that holds us.
Neo: *blinks* *surrounded by a dozen Agent Smiths* Damn.
Agent Smith: One of our purposes is to take your purpose, and make it our own...
Neo: *trembles* *snaps* WHY IS THE WORLD AGAINST ME?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yes. That is the end of this chapter. Too bad for you.
MoUsE4eVa: You'll see where it goes soon enough. Oh, you'll see... mwuhahaha...
MoRbId ChIlD: I'll try... hmm... albino jamacians... interesting concept.
Bagheera: I thank you for your review. It joys us to read such a thing.
Audrey A: Oh, don't worry. Persephone's Kiss ain't gonna get as far as that, even... *cackles madly*
Sorrow Reminisce: Yes. This is a random story thingie with lotsa character bashings. Can you tell who's getting the brunt of the attack here? The little O_O's and ^_^'s are just a way of showing stupidity and randomness.
Pat O' Cake: Trin's undies drawer gets a cameo. Do not worry. Mushrooms, eh? Hmm...
Kat: The Twins get into a hellovalota mischief, I assure you. Under the influence of Reika, sadly...
Reika: Hey!
Stormhawk: Insane? Moi? Hah! *wards off men in white coats*
Oddwen: Agent Smith hath arrived!
HellFighter: Back, creature! Back! Twins are ours! *glomps recaptured Twins* Everything in here is completely OOC. Except us.
pyromaniac firework: Thanks to you, I have something to torture Trin with now. Lard... Behehehehehe...
CHAPTER 3 SOON TO COME! Gimme more reviews and I'll get it to you as fast as I am allowed.
