This chapter is to be re-written at some point over the summer. Frankly, it's not really a finished chapter, and I'm not totally pleased with it, but I knew I needed to update.
"We all live in yellow subma-urk!" Sirius' ballad was cut to an abrupt halt as Severus clamped a hand over his mouth.
He glared, "Sirius, you've been repeating that one line for an hour. Shut... Up..."
Sirius pouted, "Well, how else do you expect me to pass the time? And I'm not playing that damn word game with you two nerds again!
Remus rolled his eyes. "If you must be entertained, then sing something a little less-" "Horrifying." Severus cut in, "Sing something that doesn't involve anything yellow."
"Fine, fine..." Sirius grumbled, but his eyes suddenly lit with a mischivous glint, "Only if you both sing too."
"No." Severus and Remus said at the same time. Sirius grinned, "All right! ... Dancing queen! Young and - OW, Remus!" "No ABBA." Remus said sternly. Sirius groaned, "Okay fine. We'll sing something as dull and lifeless as you are..." Sirius cracked a cruel grin at Remus and started, "On the first part of the journey, I was looking at all the life... There were plants and birds and rocks and things, there was sand and hills and rain" "Sirius, you know I hate that song!" Remus started, but Sirius smirked and continued on. Severus just rubbed his temples and tried to zone him out.
"The first thing I met was a fly with a buzz And the sky with no clouds The heat was hot and the ground was dry But the air was full of sound" Sirius screeched out his ballad, leaving Remus wincing. "Don't quit your day job..."
"I've been through the desert on a horse with no name It felt good to be out of the rain..."
Remus pressed his hands over his ears as he continued on, hoping any local monsters would be scared away by the so-called singing.
***
"La, la, lalala, la la..."
Remus held up a hand to stop the insecint la-ing (Sirius had forgotten what the verse after the dead riverbed was, so he had just gone on with the chorus over and over. Severus hadn't done anything to stop it, claiming this was of entirely different than before, as this was apparently a good song, and this time it was done for the sole purpose of annoying Remus.
"It's getting dark." Remus said, looking around, "We should stop for the night."
Severus looked up at the darkening sky, "That's probably a good idea. But we should sleep in shifts. We don't know what's out there."
Sirius nodded in agreement and knelt down. "Yeah. I don't fancy reaching over and putting my hand into a pile of goo that a moment ago was my best friend's face. You'll know what to do!"
Severus and Remus exchanged looks.
"What?"
"Nevermind. Huh, you know the definition of asphyxiation, but you don't know muggle movie quotes."
Remus rolled his eyes and started to flatten the grass at his feet.
"Do either of you know how to start a fire?"
Sirius bit his lip, "Er, I think it involves sticks and some string and some dried twigs?"
Severus just looked at him. "You live in a cave. How do you not know how to start a fire without magic?"
Sirius looked insulted, "Hey! You teach kids how to boil things for a living! How do you not know?"
Remus decided to step in, "Okay, stop it. We don't need another argument-related thunderstorm. Now, I remember reading something about fire-starting, so not another word out of either of you."
Picking up a handful of dried twigs and placing them in a spot of clear ground, Remus thought back to the survival article he had read months ago on in a newspaper he found on the muggle underground. He took two larger sticks from the pile and started to furiously rub them together. After only a few minutes, Remus was exauhsted.
"This... is... impossible!" he panted, pushing hair off of his face, "How can mu-"
Remus stared down at the muggle lighter that Severus had dropped on the ground in front of him.
He turned towards him, "I suppose there's a reason you didn't tell me you had that before?"
Severus just smirked, "You said "Not another word."
Sirius grinned, "Yeah. He was just following your instructions, o intrepid leader." Sirius then looked over to Severus, "Where'd you get that, anyhow?"
"Just something I probably bought while very pissed after a pub crawl. I've also got a pen with a picture of a woman on it, and when you turn it upside down, her clothes come off."
Even with the lighter, it was well-past sundown when the fire was fully started.
"I'll take the first shift watching, and I'll wake-" Remus stopped short, his train of thought broken by loud snores. He turned and saw Sirius, flat on his back.
Remus sighed, "He still snores. Great."
Severus scowled as he sat against a tree trunk. "Shall we stuff his nose with leaf litter, them?"
Remus chuckled, "That would be a waste of energy. I've tired it before, all it did was make the noise more grating."
Severus just grunted and closed his eyes, listening to the crackling fire.
As Severus and Sirius slept, Remus could not help but feel drowsy as he gazed into the dancing flames. 'Maybe,' he thought to himself, 'I'll just rest my eyes for a moment...' Remus's eyelids drooped shut, and soon, he was fast asleep as well.
