Summary:       Spike and Anne return from Hell.  Spike, once so sure of his feelings for Buffy, has his doubts about their relationship.

Disclaimer:    Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy own everything.  But I wouldn't mind leasing Spike from them for a couple of weeks :)

Feedback:     As always, appreciated.

Back Among the Living

The last thing Spike remembered was running.  Running away from the demon dogs.  Running towards the Gates.  He remembered breaking the neck of the dog that had attacked him.  Remembered running to help Anne when she had been surrounded by them.  It seemed that someone had found out the Slayer was gone from her prison.  It was obvious the pack of dogs had been given their instructions – don't let the Slayer escape.  Only one had bothered to attack him.  The others had cornered Anne.  She was almost unconscious when Spike made his way to her.  He had picked her up in his arms and ran.  He still wasn't sure how they had even made it through.  He knew that later he would feel the pain of the bites that covered his body, but for now he felt nothing but relief. 

He willed his brain to clear the fuzzy vision in front of him.  He looked from on wall to the other.  If his eyes could be believed, he was standing in the middle of the upper part of his crypt.  Years in Hell made him realize that it could be a dream, but his senses screamed at him that all of it was real.  Not wanting to disturb the scene around him, knowing that any sudden movement would make the fantasy disappear, Spike slowly peered down into the face of the girl he carried in his arms.

No, she wasn't a dream.  Anne's face lay in the crook of his shoulder.  Evidence of the battle they had fought was everywhere.  He could see the tell-tale scratches and bite marks peaking out from below her shirt and skirt.  There was blood running down her arms and legs, some matted in her hair.  One of her small bleeding hands clutched his upper arm.  The other lay balled in a fist in her lap, dog fur peaking out from between the digits.  She was hurt; he had to get her home to Buffy and Elizabeth.  Spike bent his head to place a kiss on the warrior's forehead.  "Anne, pet.  Wake up now.  We're home." 

Spike's words were quite, but they penetrated Anne's sluggish mind.  She slowly blinked the sleep from her eyes.  When had she fallen asleep?  She turned her head, looking around the crypt.  At first, the images meant nothing to her.  Spike's crypt.  His television, his chair, the refrigerator in the corner.  Everything was so normal, just like the last time she had seen it.  Suddenly panic struck.  She started shaking her head.  "No, it's an illusion.  It can't be real." 

Spike would have laughed if it hadn't been for the terror evident in her voice.  He pulled her closer to him, offering her comfort.  "It's real.  As real as I am.  We made it, pet.  We're home."  She looked up into his eyes.  She could see the confidence in them.  If Spike believed it, then it must be true.  Anne began to cry.  "Now, none of that.  We need to get you to the house.  I think its daylight, so we'll have to use the sewers.  Do you think you can walk?" 

Anne brushed the threatening tears from her face, smearing blood across her cheek.  She closed her eyes, saying a silent prayer to a god she thought had forgotten her.  Home.  The word was almost foreign to her.  It was a memory, a dream that she kept locked away deep in her heart where the demons couldn't find it.  It was a place of safety.  An oasis, a refuge.  It was family and friends.  It was people she thought she would never see again.  And right now, it was her entire world.  When she opened her eyes, the strength that had kept her sane through thousands of years of torture was back.  She gave Spike a small insolent smile.  "Well we're not going to know until you put me down, are we?" 

The question reminded Spike that he still carried the bruised Slayer.  He gently let her legs drop to the floor.  "Sorry about that, pet."  Spike had watched the emotions play on her face before she had spoken.  This quiet, reflective woman he had rescued.  He wondered how she would react to the new world to which he had brought her back.  "How you feeling?"  

Anne still held on to Spike for support.  She was assessing the damage to her thighs as she tried to balance her weight on one foot, then the other.  "A bit wobbly, but I think I can manage a trip through the sewers."  She let go of Spike's arm, quickly grabbing it again when she felt herself swaying.  "Okay.  Maybe I'll just keep my hand on your arm for awhile."

Spike laughed at the irritation evident in her voice.  He placed his hand on top of hers to lend more support.  "Sorry, pet.  Guess you'll have to rely on me to get you home."

Anne's eyes never moved from the spot where their hands lay joined on his arm, but Spike felt the change run through her entire body.  It was something he had grown accustomed to over hundreds of years in her company.  Her moods could shift like the wind.  She spoke in a voice that betrayed none of the emotion she felt.  "I always do."

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Anne's legs turned out to be a bit more wobbly than she thought.  The last part of the journey, she had almost fallen, prompting Spike to pick her up in his arms again.  It was work to get both of them out of the sewer and in through the backdoor without catching too much of the sunlight, but luck was with them.  There was a slight overcast in the Sunnydale sky. 

As Spike burst through the door, his voice filled the house.  "Slayer!"  It was one word, but it had the desired effect.  Immediately occupants of the small house started running out of every room.  Giles, Elizabeth and Dawn almost crashed into each other in their haste to make it into the kitchen.  None of them spoke as they stood transfixed by the sight before them.  The light streaming in from the open door framed the pair in a dim golden glow.  They looked more like a painting than reality.  For in what reality would a Master Vampire be holding a bleeding Slayer protectively in his arms?     

Anne was the first to break the weighted silence.  "Isn't anybody going to say hello?"  The glib comment brought the room alive.  Watcher, Slayer and Key stormed the two warriors, forcing Spike to take a cautious step backwards.  Everyone was talking at once, the sound deafening.  Spike pushed his way past them to the living room, the trio following.  He placed Anne on the couch, then moved back to stand with his shoulder against the doorframe.   

Elizabeth and Dawn sat on either side of Anne, both grabbing for one of her free hands.  Giles stood in front of them, cleaning his glasses.  "Thank God you're home."  It was Dawn's voice, filled with tears as she spoke.  She glanced in Spike's direction.  "Both of you." 

Anne squeezed her sister's hand, offering silent reassurance.  She turned to the woman sitting at her left.  "You must be Elizabeth.  Spike told me you were already here." 

Elizabeth smiled.  "Yes, I was the first.  Well, besides Buffy."  Her eyes roamed over Anne's face.  She had spent over a month dealing with one of her sisters, using her own knowledge of herself to decipher the workings of the other's mind.  Learning to see past the walls to the truth that lay hidden behind it.  She saw things in Anne that no one else would see.  Under the joy of being brought back, there was pain and fear.  "I'm glad you're home.  You're safe now."

Anne too immediately recognized and accepted the connection she shared with Elizabeth.  There were differences, but they were split from the same soul.  She drew comfort from the simple words, understanding their deeper meaning.  "Yes, I think I am."

Spike watched Giles' mouth turned down in a slight frown.  He immediately pushed himself away from the wall.  He could almost see the question forming in the Watcher's mind.  Giles had picked up on the safe bit, he knew he had.  Before the Watcher could ask anything of Anne, Spike made an inquiry of his own.  "Where's Buffy?"

The question had the desired effect.  Giles turned his attention to Spike, moving to stand in front of the vampire as he spoke.  "She's at work.  We didn't exactly know when to expect you back."  Giles' next movement caught Spike off guard.  The Watcher clasped the vampire in a clumsy hug.  "Thank you, Spike.  Thank you for bringing her back to us." 

Spike was too stunned to speak.  None of the Scoobies, besides Nibblet, had ever shown him the slightest affection.  Hell, they barely tolerated his existence.  A hug from the Watcher was not something Spike was prepared to deal with at the moment.  He stood as still as stone.  Once Giles loosened his hold and took a few steps back, Spike was a bit more comfortable.  Not able to meet Giles' eyes, Spike pointed in Anne's direction, mumbling,  "She's hurt."

Giles realized his outburst had placed the vampire in unfamiliar territory.  Thank yous, let alone physical displays of affection were uncommon events in Spike's life.  "Yes, I see that she is."  Giles turned back to the women on the couch, taking control of the situation.  "Elizabeth, why don't you help…"  Anne provided the name he was looking for.  "Why don't you help Anne upstairs.  I'm sure she could use a shower.  Then you can look at those cuts.  Dawn, go to the shelter.  Tell Buffy what's going on.  I'd call her, but I don't want to give her this information over the telephone.  Make sure she understands that both Anne and Spike are safe."  Dawn quickly nodded her agreement.  She gave Anne's hand a final squeeze before releasing it to stand.  She was almost out the door when she suddenly stopped.  She flew into Spike's arms, giving him a quick kiss and a hug.  The second burst of affection was over before Spike could react; Dawn was already out the door.  Next, Giles spoke to the befuddled vampire.  "Spike, I think you and I need to talk.  Shall we move into the kitchen?"  The two began to walk into the other room, but were stopped by Anne's voice.

Elizabeth was already helping Anne move up the stairs.  "Giles, he's hurt too.  Look after him for me."  The men watched as the two Slayers made slow progress, Anne's voice trailing behind.  "And Spike.  Don't leave." 

A small smile crossed Spike's face.  "Never, pet."  Spike wondered if the Slayer, any part of the Slayer, would ever believe him.  He had no intentions of leaving them, even if he couldn't be with them.     

Once in the kitchen, Giles pulled a bottle of scotch out of the cabinet.  "Normally, I'd say it's too early in the day, but convention be damned."  He raised on eyebrow in Spike's direction.  "Will you join me in a glass?" 

The vampire nodded his ready agreement.  He could definitely use a drink.  He watched as Giles poured two healthy doses of the amber liquid.  The Watcher looked older than he remembered.  Tired.  Yeah Spike had been stuck in Hell, but what kind of Hell had he left the rest of them in?  The waiting, the wondering.  "How long was I gone?"

Giles passed Spike a glass.  He took a drink before he answered, the liquor burning his throat.  "A little over a month.  I arrived shortly after you left.  How long was it for you?" 

Spike played with the glass in his hand, still not able to meet the Watcher's eye.  "Three, four hundred years.  I lost count."

Giles left out a ragged sigh.  If Spike was gone for four hundred years, then Anne – "Then she was in Hell for…"  He let the sentence drag off.  The realization took his breath away.

"An eternity."  Spike swallowed the lump in his throat.  "She was alone for an eternity."  Giles could only nod his agreement.  An eternity in Hell.  How could she have survived?  What had they done to her in that place?  Spike briefly glanced in Giles' direction.  Spike was counting on him to hold things together when he left again.  He needed a Watcher who was in control.  "She's a strong woman, Ruppert.  She made her way through it.  Don't blame yourself for a situation you knew nothing about.  It won't help her now.  And she is going to need your help."

Giles tried to shake off the melancholy surrounding him.  "Yes, they will all need our help."  Giles thought about all three girls.  How would their separate experiences affect them once they were joined together?  He poured another glass of the fiery liquid.  "I should call the others.  They'll want to know your back."

Spike snorted at the remark.  "They'll want to know SHE's back.  They could bloody well care less about me.  I'll just be slipping off to my crypt.  Tell Anne I'll be back to check on her later."  Spike made an attempt to stand, but the stab of pain forced him to sit back down.  He had almost forgotten the wound in his side.  The movement caught the attention of the Watcher.

Giles lowered his glass.  Lord, Anne had told him Spike was hurt.  "We should tend to that.  How badly were you injured?"  He rounded the center island reaching for Spike.

The vampire stood, this time prepared for the pain.  He moved away from Giles' hand.  He didn't want Giles' help.  Didn't want anyone's help.  All he wanted was to get out of the house before Buffy came home.  "I'm fine, Ruppert.  Just a scratch."  Hesitantly, Giles moved away from Spike.  "Look, there are some things I should tell you before I go.  She has nightmares.  Terrible nightmares.  They might stop now that's she's back, but I can't be sure.  Don't let the Nibblet wake her from them.  Let Buffy or Elizabeth do it.  She, she tries to fight before she wakes up.  She wouldn't want to hurt one of you."  Spike took an unneeded breath.  "Don't ask too many questions with the Nibblet in the room.  There are things Anne went through that Dawn doesn't need to know about.  It will only scare her."

Giles knew.  Deep down he knew what Spike wasn't saying.  Since finding out that part of Buffy was trapped in Hell, Giles had been hiding from the truth.  He had hoped that somehow she would escape.  That she would be spared the inevitable.  But it was time to face reality.  "Torture?"

Spike looked directly into Giles eyes, locking stares with the Watcher.  He was only prepared to say it once.  "She was raped, Ruppert.  Physically and mentally.  Don't push her."

Giles wanted to weep for his Slayer, his child.  The thin walls of his imaginary world tumbled down at Spike's statement of fact.  "No.  I won't question her about it.  If she wants to talk, I'll listen, but I won't probe."

Spike started this; he needed to finish it.  "Also, she isn't like Buffy.  She's been through too much on her own.  She can be crass and uncaring.  Watch her around the others.  They used images of all of us to torture her, to play with her mind.  I'm not sure if she can distinguish between what she knows to be real and what she experienced in Hell.  She may remember one of you doing or saying something that didn't really happen."

Before Giles could comment, Buffy and Dawn came barreling threw the front door.  Buffy yelled as she entered, much the same way Spike had when he brought Anne home.  "Spike!"

Spike swore under his breath.  Bloody hell!  Now he would have to face her.  "In here, Slayer."

Buffy rounded the corner into the kitchen, not stopping until she was standing in front of the vampire she had missed for weeks.  There was blood everywhere she looked.  Tentatively she stretched her hand out to him.  If she touched him, then she would know he was real.  "Are you?…  Is she?…"

Before Buffy's hand could make contact, Spike stepped back.  At the small retreat, Buffy let her hand drop back to her side.  "She's fine, Slayer.  A bit smashed up, but nothing you haven't experienced before.  Elizabeth took her upstairs."  Spike couldn't let Buffy touch him.  He knew eventually Anne would tell her about the tortures of Hell.  Tortures administered by demons.  Soulless, evil creatures like him.  For the first time, Spike understood what they all saw when they looked at him.  He was unclean.  And he wouldn't allow her to dirty herself by touching him.  Not again.   

Buffy could only nod her head.  She was confused by her own emotions and Spike's actions.  Everything inside told her to launch herself into his arms.  To find strength and protection there.  But he had backed away.  He had called her Slayer.  He only did that when he was angry at her.  What had she done?  "I guess I should go check on her."  Buffy looked at Giles for confirmation.

Giles noted the confusion on her face and the silent retreat Spike had made.  "Yes, Buffy.  I'm sure she's finished with her shower.  Why don't you and Dawn go help Elizabeth with the badges.  If nothing else, I'm sure your presence will calm her.  I'll call Xander and Willow myself."

Reluctantly, Buffy agreed.  She was the Slayer.  She had obligations.  She didn't have time to deal with Spike.  He would wait.  She turned to walk out of the kitchen, Dawn trailing behind her.  With her back to Spike, she spoke to him once again.  "Thank you."  It was almost a whisper.

Giles saw the unmasked pain and love flash across Spike's face.  What the hell was going on between the two of them?  The man had just returned from Hell for God's sake.  Spike should be clutching Buffy to him, not pushing her away.  Giles watched Buffy turn the corner.  When he was sure she was out of hearing range, he turned towards Spike.  "What just happened?"  But his question was met by dead air.  The vampire was gone.

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Spike felt the man standing outside his crypt before he entered.  Briefly the thought past threw Spike's mind that Giles had never actually been inside his home before.  Spike chuckled.  The Watcher walked in much like the Slayer, not knocking, not offering a greeting.  He placed the bag he carried on the sarcophagus.  "Buffy sent me to take a look at those wounds.  Take off your shirt."

Spike wanted to argue, but he couldn't.  He knew this time Giles wouldn't leave him alone.  And it was obvious that the Watcher still had questions.  Spike stood up from his chair, doing what he was told as he walked over to Giles.  With some effort, he managed to work his way to sit next to Giles' bag. 

The Watcher worked in silence, inspecting each of Spike's wounds.  Most were shallow, already starting to heal with vampiric speed, but the one on his left side was deep and ragged.  Spike hissed through his teeth as Giles lightly poked and prodded at the gash.  "Demon dog?"

Spike raised his arm, craning his head to look at the wound.  "Took a bit of a nip as we were leaving."  Giles poured the antiseptic on the deep wound.  "Bloody hell, Ruppert!"  Spike yelled from the pain.  "It's not like I'm going to get an infection!"

Giles paid no attention to Spike's protests as he continued to tend the wound.  Once it was cleaned to his satisfaction, he covered it with a clean bandage.  He reached into the sack, pulling out a bag of blood.  He handed it to the vampire.      

Spike slowly took the bag of what he knew was human blood.  He wasn't thrilled about drinking it like this in front of Giles.  He missed the 'Kiss the Librarian' cup he had used when he stayed at Giles' apartment.  But he was hungry.  He morphed into game face, sinking his teeth into the treat. 

At the first taste, Spike almost spit the blood onto the floor.  He pulled the bag out of his mouth, looking between it and the Watcher.  Why had he given him this?  Giles' eyes never left Spike's as he spoke.  "There are three more bags.  Buffy had it drawn while you were gone."

Spike could only stare at Giles, confusion still playing across his face.  It was Slayer's blood in his hands.  Buffy's blood.  Spike shoved the bag back at Giles.  "I don't want it."  He had never taken blood from Buffy before; he wasn't going to start now. 

Giles pushed Spike's hand away.  "It will help with the wound.  Speed the recovery time.  I know you didn't need to feed while you were in Hell, but you need it now."  Spike continued to shake his head no.  "She wants you to have it.  She felt useless while you were gone.  This made her feel like she was doing something to help.  Would you just bloody drink it!"  With that, Giles turned his back on the stunned vampire.

Spike raised his eyes to the ceiling.  Could a vampire pray for guidance?  The taste of Buffy's blood was lingering in his mouth.  The demon inside him wanted more, but the man was reviled.  She had given him a gift.  But if he took it, how could he ever look at her again.  She knew the chip didn't work on her.  Would she always think he wanted another taste?  Would she ever let him get close to her again?

Giles knew there was a war waging behind him.  He hadn't been thrilled with Buffy when she announced her plan.  Giving free samples to vampires was not what a Slayer was supposed to do, but he remembered what she had said.  Maybe it would help Spike.  He repeated the comment.  "Part of her for part of her."

Spike's head snapped back into place.  It wasn't a gift at all.  She was offering him payment!  Spike's undead heart broke for the hundredth time.  Blood payment for the monster.  "Bugger me."  He drank the blood, wondering which one of them truly was the evil, soulless creature.   

When all four bags were finished, he jumped down from the sarcophagus.  Walking past Giles, he opened the small refrigerator in the corner.  Just because Buffy was a bitch, didn't mean he had to take it out on the Watcher.  "I don't have any scotch, but I can offer you a beer."

"No, thank you."  Giles watched as Spike grabbed a beer for himself.  "Our talk earlier was interrupted.  I'd like to continue it, if you feel up to it."  Spike motioned for Giles to find a seat.  Once they were comfortable, Giles started.  "What happened?"

Spike took a drink of his beer.  "When I found her, she was naked, chained to a wall.  She didn't believe me when I told her I was there to get her out.  That's how I found out about the mind games and the other.  In an attempt to break her, they invaded her mind.  Used whatever they found as a weapon against her."

"She won't let Xander, Willow or me touch her."  Giles was asking a question, not making a statement.

"She wouldn't let me touch her at first."  Spike's mind drifted back to those first few days with her.  "It took years, literally hundreds of years, before she stopped jumping away anytime I brushed passed her.  They never broke her, Ruppert, but they came damn close.  I wasn't lying about the nightmares.  She screams in her sleep.  It's a mix of pain and pleading.  It's bloody awful."

Giles took a moment to digest the information.  He had told Buffy and Elizabeth about the nightmares before he left the Summers' house.  He didn't want to see Dawn hurt by her own sister.  "How much does she know about what's occurred in her absence?"

Spike ran his hand absently threw his hair.  "I told her about the resurrection spell Red performed, but she wouldn't let me tell her anything else.  Not about the Scoobies or Nibblet.  I didn't tell her that you had gone to England.  She didn't want to hear about anything that had happened since Buffy came back.  Doesn't even know the whelp and the demon-girl are engaged."

Giles nodded in understanding.  Things were starting to make sense.  "I figured as much.  Earlier she asked about Tara.  I made an excuse before the others could say anything.  Then I had Dawn telephone, asking her to come to the house.  I told them to say as little as possible until I had a chance to talk to you."

Spike knew the whole mixed up truth about the months she was gone would come as quite a shock to Anne.  "She used this perfect image of what she left behind to hold on for so long.  I think you should let Buffy tell her what's happened.  She may take it better coming from her."

Giles was finished for the moment.  The rest of the information he could get from Anne when she was feeling better.  He moved on to shaker ground, not sure what Spike's response would be.  "You hurt Buffy earlier."  At the vampire solemn expression, Giles continued.  "She didn't understand why you backed away from her."

Spike wanted to disappear.  Suddenly, he wasn't talking to the Watcher.  No, now he was talking to a concerned parent.  He couldn't explain it to himself, how was he supposed to make the Watcher understand?  He was too bloody old for this.  "Ruppert, that isn't something I'm going to discuss with you."

"Then you can discuss it with me."  Spike turned to look at the Slayer standing in his doorway.  He had been so wrapped up in his conversation with Giles, he hadn't even felt her presence.  Buffy took a few more steps into the crypt, keeping her eyes on Spike as she spoke.  "Giles, I left Elizabeth at home to take care of Anne, but…"

"Of course, Buffy.  I'll take care of them.  Not to worry."  Giles glanced quickly between the vampire and the Slayer before making his departure.  It was obvious that they needed to talk privately.

Buffy was mad, fuming mad.  Earlier she had been hurt, but time had turned that hurt to rage.  She had thought about the events of the last month.  How dare he treat her like that!  Buffy refused to walk any closer to Spike.  Being physically close to him always caused her problems.  She was prone to either kiss him or hit him.  Right now, she wasn't sure which she wanted to do more.  "You left me."

Spike again ran a hand through his hair.  She was really the last person he wanted to talk to right now.  He had just returned from Hell.  He need to sort through his feelings alone.  Couldn't anyone give him a moment's peace?  "I thought it was best to get out of the way.  Anne was home.  I did my job."

Buffy tilted her head.  He could be such a stupid vampire.  She crossed in arms in front of her.  "Not today.  You left me."

Spike forced out a jagged breath.  He knew what she was talking about.  He had left without telling her where he was going or why.  "Slayer, you know I had to go.  How long did it take Elizabeth to tell you?  Knew the girl couldn't keep a secret."

"We are not talking about Elizabeth."  Buffy's control was almost at the breaking point.  "You should have told me what was going on.  You had no right to do that without telling me." 

Spike could see that she was seething.  Nothing good was going to come of this.  "Slayer, I do what I want to do.  I don't answer to you."

"The HELL you don't!  When it involves me, you damn well do answer to me."  Buffy took a few steps toward him, anger ruling over her better judgment.  As her rage grew, so did her boldness. 

"It wasn't your fight."  Spike tried to make the comment sound casual.  He didn't want to do this with her.  Not now.  Not when things in his head were so mixed up.  "The Powers called on me, not you."

Buffy took a few more steps toward him.  She was standing in front of him now.  Her hands were instinctively balling into fists.  "I don't give a damn about the Powers.  If you love me, you should have told me what was going on.  I could have helped."

Spike stood to meet her.  When she got this angry, she had a tendency to pull stakes out of thin air.  Better to be prepared to defend himself.  He would let her rant and rave, and then get her out of his crypt.  But before he could answer her, his eyes caught the empty bags of blood still sitting on the sarcophagus.  Suddenly, he was just as enraged as she was.  "Well, it seems you found your own way to 'help', didn't you?  I should thank you for the blood.  It was more payment than I deserved."

That stopped Buffy.  Something wasn't right here.  Why was he suddenly so angry with her?  She glanced backwards, trying to find whatever it was that Spike was looking at.  "Payment?  What are you talking about?"

"A part of you for a part of you?  That's what the Watcher said."  This time Spike took a step in Buffy's direction, forcing her to move backwards.  "Don't worry, Slayer, you aren't in my debt.  The bill's been paid.  I don't want anything else from you."  There was loathing in his eyes.  "Now, get out." 

Buffy's mind couldn't understand how the conversation had changed so quickly.  She saw the empty blood bags.  He thought it was payment?  There was another battle going on in Spike's mind and she didn't have a clue what it was.  Her Slayer training took over.  Fallback, regroup.  She clung to the only thing she knew to be true.  "You love me."

Spike had never purposely lied to Buffy before, but it was too much for him.  Buffy's blood payment, Anne's torture by the demons.  He would never be more than he was, and it would never be what she needed.  No, he had to end it here for both their sakes.  He turned dead eyes to her hurt one's.  "It's been over three hundred years, Slayer.  Love dies."

He might as well have slapped her across the face.  Buffy's entire body trembled.  Her hand came up to cover the scream that threatened to escape.  She knew it would happen.  Love someone and they leave.  It was her personal curse.  Those words had done more damage to her than any punch he had ever landed, any kick he had ever thrown.  She was empty.  With tears streaming down her face, Buffy ran from the crypt. 

Spike slowly walked to the open crypt door, shutting it behind her.  For a moment he laid his forehead on the cool metal.  The last look on her face replaying through his mind.  He turned his back to the door, slowly sliding to the floor.  It was for the best.  He had to keep telling himself.  He was a monster.  He was evil.  He couldn't love her.  He didn't have a soul.  His voice was full of raw emotion as one word escaped.  "Buffy."

---TBC