Bill the loser

Now, bill was a lazy man, never worked an honest day in his miserable life - that loser (everyone hated him and he hated them it was a vicious cycle the kind bill liked).

So 12 days ago bill, (laziest man on earth) was watering his lawn although it was the middle of a hot aussie summer and the water ban was on, he didn't even like his lawn he scattered it with clutter and old crap that he also didn't like, unless that is if you liked it then he would take it inside, clean it up and parade it every time ya come over.

Anyway this guy was watering his lawn when old mrs fingle came up for a chat. old mrs fingle was not old at all, infact she was an extremely attractive 23 year old with boobs to the moon and a pretty face. people only called her old cause she wore a funny old ladies hat for a while in school, and the name had stuck. Bob had always liked her that's why he paid her 600 bucks to root him every now and then.

So she came up to his house this day and dodged all his rusty crap and stood right behind him, he didn't even know she was there due to his stupidness and a knack for day dreaming so she tapped him on his shoulder bill was so startled he turned around so quick that his hairy little leg got snagged on a rusty piece of something which caused him to fall on his ass and that wasn't the worst thing he had fallen on a barb about a foot long, it pierced straight through his asshole, straight up his shlong and out his jap eye.

Bill was in agony; he called up the doctor. "Hello doctor's office" said a concerned lady

'Yeah' said bull in an uncomfortable voice. 'I wanna see the doc its been twelve days since i first felt the pain and i still have got it, it fucken kills. 'Ok we have most of this wonderful arvo free so just pop down' said the nurse.

'Just pop down' said bill in a high pitched mocking voice. 'I'll fucken pop you down ya dirty mole I'll be down there in 10 to sort out me cock'. The lady on the phone was stunned, never had she heard such vulgar language there was a slight pause then bill hung up the phone.

the end