Chapter 4

Thanx for all the reviews

A little R rated here...but nothing too graphic

The song in here is Bloody Romance by Senses Fail
This chapter is kind of cliche...but give it a try.

-J3n

Rorys Pov

I had decided that day when I was left in the Parking lot to ditch school. I had decided to walked home. It was a long walk, but it was good time for me to think. I still couldn't forget the way his blue eyes began to tear, the way he had been sobbing, the way he yelled at me with such force in his voice to "get the fuck out." But the most hardest thing to forget was the way his voice sounded when he told him not to touch him. So scared, so hurt. It had cut through me, and here I am now on my floor holding my torn heart in my hands, trying desperately to put them together. I had been stupid for lying to him like that. I still hadn't gotten over the fact that I had been right. He hadn't told me he loved me, but why was he relentlessly crying in the car? He had been so hurt. Was he going to miss the sex we had that bad?

Or maybe he did love me, it doesn't matter now because he hates me.

Shaking my head to relieve all the thoughts that had consumed my head I searched for my favorite hair tie. No such luck, a shiny object captured my attention, picking the razor blade up I began to stare at it for who knows how long.

I heard my mother in the distant saying something. I yelled back something incoherent, panicking, I stuck the razor blade in one of the pockets in my backpack. I smelt coffee meaning my mom would be near by. I looked up to see her in her usual giddy mood, hands on either side of her hips. I wondered for a second if she had seen me earlier fiddling with the sharp thing, but to my relief her smile indicated she didn't.

"Do I have to drag you to the living room?"

Shaking my head, I gulped down the lump that began to form in my throat. "I'm ready."

"Finally!" She yelled skipping on her way.

~~Next day at Chilton~

Leaning my head on the locker, I let my thoughts deteriorate me before homeroom started. I smelt a familiar sent of cologne and opened my eyes just in time to see he was coming towards me. He looked different somehow, there was this jagged aura around him and his eyes were so...dead. His all to familiar smirk was there and I approached him.

"Tristan, look I'm sorry-" He walked right passed me before giving me this glare that could freeze fire. At that moment I felt like I could die. With just one look he had my heart ripped out and tore it to pieces, the worst part was he looked like he didn't care, satisfied even.

~~Life, is floating fast away.
But I look, your head is turned away.~~

The bell rang and instead of going to homeroom I went to the bathroom. I couldn't go to class like this. Making sure no one was in there, I began to cry. It was astonishing, no matter how much I cried, the tears never ran out, it was as if my tears were immortal. Searching for tissue in the bathroom stalls became tiring and I went through my bag as the last resort. Digging in my bag, I suddenly felt a pang of pain from one of my fingers. Muttering a curse word as stared at my pointer finger that had been sliced slightly, I felt better. Looking for the razor blade still crying, a smile began to form on my lips as I felt a metal piece between my fingers. I folded my sleeves up, and placed the razor on my skin... "So slice open my veins, And let the romance bleed away..." I sang. Slice. "So slice open my veins And let the romance bleed away." Slice. Tears. A frown. Realizing what I have just done, I brought my hand to my mouth to cover the "Oh my gods" that escaped my lips. My lips began to tremble and I waited for the second play of waterworks to erupt. I heard a gasp, and looked in the mirror to see a very frightened Paris behind me. In that moment I froze.

"Oh my god Rory...what were you thinking, what made you do this?" Silence.

"It was Tristan, wasn't it?" The mention of his named burned the frozen state I was in, and I began to cry. Paris immediately came and embraced me in what I think she called a hug. She told me everything would be all right. Yeah right, everything will be all right. Bullshit.

"Please don't tell him..."

"shhh...hun, don't worry." A wetness began to form on my shoulders and I realized Paris had been crying also. Touched, I began to comfort her too. There was a good 15 minutes till homeroom were to end, wanting to clean up the sink I told her to wait outside. Understanding what I was talking about, ready to leave she opened the door wide enough for me too see him leaning casually on a locker making out with a girl. I Forced my gaze to the floor and to my relief Paris hadn't know I seen him. Once the door closed, I slumped to the ground head in hands, knowing already that she was going to talk to him, I forced myself to get up and open the door slightly to hear.
"You know Dugrey you are something else."

"Paris, not now I'm busy." Indicating his new flavor of the week.

"Don't talk to Rory again.." Her voice had been warning, and I became afraid of what she was going to say.

"I'm not planning to." A quiver of my lips.

"You hurt her, you asshole."

"Why does she always have to be the victim, shut it Paris, you don't know what you're talking about." His voice rising.

"She was the one that ruined it, she was the jerk." A sting to my eyes.

"You Hurt-"

"She wasn't the only one hurting..." The tears ran freely now.

"Well from what I have seen, shes physically hurting..." Oh my god. She promised she wasn't going to tell him...

"What?"

"So slice open my veins And let the romance bleed away." she had repeated the words that had been previously said from my mouth. With that she walked away. Not bothering to pull down my sleeves, I carelessly wiped the tears away, and rushed to him. My wounds forgotten, the only wounds that mattered was his. I had to set him straight, I had to tell him the truth. I waited until he told the girl goodbye and it was then that I approached him.

"Tristan-"

"Who are you?"

"Stop this please...im sorry." Not having the energy to look at him I hung my head in shame. "Please just hear me out and then ill leave you alone I promise."

"Mary, look at me." Lifting my head so I could look him in the eyes, the first thing I noticed that his eyes weren't clouded with bitterness like it had been this morning, instead it was dancing with sincerity and concern. He wrapped his hand around my naked wounded hand and panicking I jerked my hand back pushing down my sleeves. Frowning at how much the slices hurt, he must have taken it in the wrong way because the sincerity his eyes had possessed had disappeared. I watched as he shook his head and looked me in the eyes with such intensity that I was afraid I would fall. His jaw clenched and he stared at the ground.

"I don't know why I'm still talking to you, its over."

"Over?" My knees began shaking and in need of support I leaned against the locker.

"Yea...we fucked and its now its over." All the while he was still staring at the ground. He thinks I'm dirt.

My mouth went dry and my vision began to blur. Silence. It was as if in slow motion he lifted his eyes looked at me, the fire in his eyes dancing. Then he uttered a sentence that made me wish I had never heard.

"Have a good life and I hope to never see you again." His voice in a hoarse whisper. With that I watched as he turned and walk away. Tristan had left with my heart and I was terrified wondering what he would do to it.
"Bye Bye Trisan, Bye Bye heart."

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