Chapter One
~ January 8th, 2002 ~
"Look, Zander," Carly Benson said to her friend, spinning around in a
circle, her arms open wide. "I'm almost ready to open. Another few weeks, at most."
Zander Smith felt his mouth curve into a smile as Carly's happiness radiated onto him. "You've done it, Carly. You should be proud of yourself. You've done this with almost no help."
Carly snorted. "Yeah, right. Where would I be right now without you?"
"Probably in much better shape," Zander teased.
Carly chuckled, "Whatever, pal." She noticed a strand of hair had fallen onto Zander's forehead and gently swiped it away for him.
Zander stood still, his mind frozen; feeling like her fingers had burned his forehead where she touched it.
"Something wrong?" she asked, noticing the startled look on his face.
"No," Zander replied quickly. "Nothing's wrong. I just remembered that I have an appointment later today. I had totally forgotten before now."
"What appointment?" Carly asked, trying to sound interested, though her mind was not really on their conversation.
"Uh, er, that was - " Zander stumbled, trying quickly to come up with
something.
Carly glanced over at him, suddenly noticing his stammering. "I thought you just remembered?"
"It's something at the warehouse." Zander forced a smile. "I can't remember exactly what right now, but I know it's something. So," he decided to change the subject. "Have you decided on a name for the club yet?"
"Not yet," Carly responded. She smiled again as she looked around her at the newly painted walls. She took a deep breath. "Doesn't it smell fresh and new?"
"Actually, it smells like wet paint."
Carly smacked Zander's arm playfully. "Very funny." Impulsively, she hugged him.
Surprised, Zander had to fight his body not to respond to Carly's touch the way it immediately wanted to. He slipped his arms around her waist and rested his head against hers. "What's this for?" he asked, trying to keep his voice normal.
"For being such a wonderful friend to me, Zander," Carly said seriously, pulling away. "I've never had a real friend since Jason left Port Charles. It's nice to have someone to talk to again. To be able to just be me. I didn't have that with Sonny or AJ or Tony. Only with Jason, and now you."
Zander was pleased and slightly flattered at her words. "I'm glad I make you feel that way, Carly. You should have someone that you can be honest with. It's like I was able to be with --" He trailed off, hurt evident in his eyes.
"With Emily," Carly finished for him, lightly touching his arm. "I'm sorry, Zander. I know it still hurts for you to think about her."
"There's nothing for you to be sorry about," Zander replied, forcing a
smile. "Emily is a part of my past. And yes, I felt that way with Emily. Before I met Emily, I was such a rotten kid. I'd do such horrible things, especially being hired by Sorel. But Emily changed all that. She made me want to be a better person, someone that she could be proud of. And now, I am. I've become someone totally different. And now there's a new person that makes me feel like Emily used to."
"Who?" Carly asked.
Zander realized he'd said too much and was relieved when his cell phone
rang. "Ah, saved by the bell," he teased. He grabbed his phone and pressed the button. "Hello?"
"Zander, it's Sonny." His boss' voice filled his ear. Not only was Sonny Corinthos his boss, but he was also Carly's ex-husband.
"Hey." Zander kept his voice light and turned away from Carly so she
couldn't see his face. While Carly was aware that Zander had loyalties to Sonny and that he worked at Sonny's warehouse, she wasn't aware of the extra little assignments Sonny paid him to do on the side. 'Especially the one where he pays me to watch over Carly' Zander thought. 'She'd hate me if she ever found that out.' Which was why Zander was determined never to let her find out about that. "What's up?"
"I just wanted to make sure you remembered our meeting later," Sonny
answered.
"I did remember it," Zander said carefully. "And I'll be there in about
fifteen minutes. I'm leaving now." He checked his watch as an added measure.
"Are you with Carly now?" Sonny asked.
"Yeah."
"Okay. See you when you get here." Sonny hung up.
Zander paused for a moment longer. "Thanks for reminding me, Gus. I'll see you as soon as I can. Bye." He closed his cell phone and turned back to Carly.
"Have to go to your meeting now?" Carly asked immediately.
"Were you spying on me, Miss Benson?" Zander asked, trying to paste a
serious look on his face.
Carly blushed. "Not intentionally, really. I was going to leave the room, but it didn't seem.." Carly trailed off when she noticed the smirk on Zander's face. "You're just kidding, aren't you?"
Zander nodded and laughed helplessly. "You should've seen your face," he gasped. "It was totally priceless!"
"I'll priceless you!" Carly growled, raising her fist in mock anger.
Zander ducked his head. "A great time for a graceful exit," he said,
grabbing his jacket. "I'll see you around."
Carly nodded and watch as Zander disappeared from the club. "See you
around," she echoed. Her eyes fell on the time and she gasped. "I was going to take Michael to see Sonny today! I'd better get going, or it's not going to be much of a surprise."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
As Zander headed towards Sonny's, his mind began whirling. "The first thing I'm going to tell Sonny is that this job is over. I'm in love with Carly, and I want to pursue that. How can I do that if Sonny is paying me to be around her? She'd hate me just on principle." Zander smiled as he thought of Carly. So beautiful, and smart and especially intelligent. She was a ball of fire, but one that Zander definitely wanted around on a more permanent basis.
He arrived at Sonny's office at the warehouse and knocked on the door. "Come in!" Sonny called.
Zander walked inside, leaving the door open. "Hey, Sonny."
Sonny smiled his usual half-grin at Zander. "Sorry I haven't seen you much lately; I've been busy," he said.
Zander nodded and sat down in the chair in front of Sonny's desk. "Yeah, I've noticed."
Sonny knit his eyebrows together. "Is something wrong?"
Zander looked uncomfortable. "I need to talk to you about something."
"It sounds important," Sonny observed, studying Zander.
"It is," Zander confirmed.
"Okay. But before you start, I have something for you."
"I don't want anything from -- " Zander began to object.
"Relax." Sonny smirked. "It's not something you haven't earned." He reached into his desk drawer and lifted out an envelope. He extended it to Zander. "With my thanks."
Zander opened the envelope and saw that it was full of money. "Sonny," he began.
Neither Zander nor Sonny heard the footsteps coming towards the office or saw Carly as she stood just off to the side of Sonny's office. She hadn't intended to eavesdrop, but she'd told Michael to wait outside and she'd let him know when it was time to surprise Uncle Sonny. And now that she was at Sonny's office, she was surprised to hear Zander's voice talking with Sonny. What was he doing there? And why hadn't he told her the truth about whom he was meeting with? She wondered about the money Sonny was giving Zander. What was it for? And why hadn't Zander told her he was doing an extra job for Sonny?
"I know it's more than we agreed on, Zander," Sonny said, waving away
Zander's objections. "But you've done such a good job keeping your eye out for Carly that I thought a little extra was in order."
Carly's heart stopped at Sonny's words. THAT was the reason Zander had been spending all that time with her? Because Sonny was paying him to? A lone tear ran down her right cheek as she felt her heart split in two. "Bastard," she muttered before turning and leaving. One thing Carly was sure of, Zander Smith was not going to make a fool out of her anymore. Carly Benson needed no man to take care of her, and she was going to prove that.
Zander and Sonny were totally unaware of what Carly just heard and continued their conversation. "Sonny, I can't take this," Zander said after a moment's pause, his heart pounding.
"Consider it a bonus," Sonny offered.
Zander shook his head. "That's not what I mean, Sonny. I can't take any of this money. Not even one cent." He placed the envelope back on the desk.
"What? Why?"
Zander bit his lip for a moment and then expelled a breath. "Because I'm in love with Carly, Sonny. I came here today to tell you that. God help me, I've fallen in love with your ex-wife. And because of that, I can't take money from you to be around her. I want to be around her, spend time with her, and look out for her and Michael. I don't want to be paid by you to take care of the woman I love. Carly would never forgive either of us for that."
Sonny had a look of surprise on his face. "Well," he said, expelling his own breath. "This is certainly not what I expected." He eyed Zander sternly. "I don't really know what to say to you, Zander."
"There's nothing you can say, Sonny." Zander smiled, feeling like a weight had been lifted off his chest. "I didn't expect for this to happen. I even tried to stop it when I first began feeling it happening. But," he shook his head. "There was nothing I could do. Carly, she - well, she's the first person since Emily that has made me feel good about myself. She makes me want to do good things, to make her proud."
"Okay, stop there," Sonny said, his eyebrows knitted together with a frown. "What do you want from me?"
"Nothing," Zander said honestly. "I just wanted to let you know how I felt and to let you know that I no longer want this particular job from you. I will continue to look out for Carly, make no mistake, but not as your employer."
"I suppose you expect my blessing."
Zander stood up and shook his head. "Actually, no, I don't. No offense,
Sonny, but I don't care if I have your blessing or not. I'm not asking your permission to love Carly. I couldn't change my feelings for her now if I tried. But I am asking you to understand my feelings and respect them."
Sonny didn't say anything, but he admired Zander's guts and honesty. "Go away with you now," he said with a wave of his hand. "I need some time to think about this."
Zander nodded. "I'll talk to you later." He turned and left.
Sonny watched him go with a shake of his head.
Chapter Two
~ January 9th, 2002 ~
Zander whistled to himself as he walked up the front steps to Carly's house. Today was the day: he was going to tell Carly the truth about how he felt about her. As he was almost at her door, Zander felt his heart begin to pound. He broke out into a nervous sweat and wiped his hands on the side of his pants. "Take it easy, man," he told himself. He inhaled a deep breath and then exhaled it. "What are you afraid of?" But he knew the answer. Zander was afraid of rejection. Terrified of it, actually. Especially after what happened with Emily.
Zander shivered suddenly and looked up at the sky. It was snowing harder today than it had been for the last few days. Zander had heard on the radio that morning that a storm was heading their way sometime in the next day or so. He hoped it wouldn't be too bad, as Zander
hated snow. Suddenly Zander shook his and laughed. He decided to stop
stalling and take the plunge. Raising his hand, he knocked on the door.
Carly came to the door after several seconds. She glanced Zander over for a long moment before speaking. "Can I help you?" she asked icily.
Zander was totally unprepared for the tone of her voice. The smile faded from his face and he knit his eyebrows together. "I need to talk to you," he said, keeping his tone light. "May I come in?"
"No."
"Excuse me?"
"No, Zander, you may not come in," Carly's eyes were full of fire.
"Carly, is something wrong?" Zander asked.
Carly laughed hollowly. Zander shuddered at the sound. "Why would anything be wrong, Zander? Do you know something that I don't?"
Zander backed up a few steps. "Maybe I should go -"
"Go? Yes, Zander, that's a good idea. Go." Carly came outside and shut the door behind her. Wrapping her arms about herself, she walked closer to Zander. "Do me a favor and go. And don't ever come back."
"What? Why?" Now Zander was really surprised.
"Why? Don't you know why?" Carly couldn't believe her ears.
"No, I don't know, but I DO know that you're acting kind of strange." Zander was afraid of the look in Carly's eyes. She looked like she could easily strangle him without a second thought.
Carly smiled as sweetly as she could manage. "You've done such a good job taking care of me, Zander," she purred, switching tactics. "In fact, you must be so totally tired of being around me and Michael all the time. A married woman and her son must bore you so."
"N-n-n-n-no," Zander stammered, caught off guard at her sudden change in mood. "I'm not bored - You don't bore me."
Carly's eyes bored into Zander's. "Why don't you go back to doing your real job, Zander? Sonny must wonder where you are all the time."
Zander felt his face become hot and knew his cheeks were flaming. "N-n-no, he doesn't. Sonny knows where I am at all times."
Carly raised her eyebrows. "And he's okay with you spending all your time over here? With his wife? Neglecting your other jobs? Wow, I've never known Sonny to be that generous when it comes to business."
Zander knew now that something had happened between the previous evening and that morning. Had Sonny told Carly how Zander felt about him? He probably had, and Carly obviously didn't return his feelings.
Zander felt his heart cracking into two pieces as he saw the hate in her eyes. What he didn't know was that beneath the hatred Carly was spewing was hurt. He noticed Carly's teeth chattering and wanted to reach out and keep her warm, but didn't dare.
Carly was extremely hurt but was determined not to show it to anyone,
especially not Zander. She'd never give him the satisfaction of knowing how his actions had hurt her.
"I don't know how Sonny feels about it," Zander said lamely. "Or how it
affects his business. I've never been privy to that sort of information, Carly." Pride was seeping into Zander's voice now. He didn't like the way she was treating him, no matter what the reason. If she didn't return his feelings, that was fine, but Zander didn't want to be attacked. "But if he hasn't said anything to me about it, I don't know why it concerns you so much."
Carly narrowed her eyes. "Because you're always here," she hissed, shivering from the cold. "And that affects me and my life, as well as my son's life, Zander. Try thinking of someone else's feelings for a chance instead of your own, or Sonny's."
"That was a cheap shot, Carly, and it was totally unfair. For the last few weeks all I've cared about are your feelings and Michael's. I haven't considered Sonny's feelings or even my own as much as I have yours and your son's. I've been there to stop you from doing some of your crazy, stupid schemes that you normally do. You know, the ones where you don't think first? Actually, that seems to happen all the time, doesn't it?"
Carly whistled. "Touché, Zander. Now who's taking cheap shots?"
"Just repaying the favor, Carly," Zander shot back. "I don't know where you suddenly developed this major change in attitude between yesterday and today or why, but I have done nothing to deserve this from you. Not only that, but I won't stand here and take this crap any longer. Have a nice life, Ms. Benson."
Carly watched as Zander turned and left. "You have a nice life too, Zander! And please, don't worry about me! I can take care of myself just fine!" She went back inside and slammed the door as hard as she could, shivering terribly. It was colder outside than it looked, and her teeth were clattering. Carly knew that part of her was shaking from the anger she was feeling. Now that she was inside and by herself, Carly allowed her muscles to relax some.
Carly walked over to her couch and collapsed on it, tucking her legs beneath her and clutching a throw pillow to her chest. Her lips curled into a sad frown and her eyes clouded over as she recounted the scene she'd just had in front of her house. "Why does it hurt so much?" she asked herself, brushing away the two tears that streaked down her cheek.
** knock, knock **
Carly stood up and walked to her front door again, her face stony. She was prepared to tell Zander off if it was him. Throwing back the door, Carly opened her mouth and ... "Sonny!" She was surprised to see him standing on her doorstep. Suddenly Carly realized that not only was she angry at Zander, but she was angry with Sonny too.
"Carly," Sonny nodded at her and half-smiled. "May I come in?"
It was on the tip of her tongue to say the same thing to Sonny that she'd said to Zander, but her son's arrival quickly stopped her.
"Uncle Sonny!" Michael cried as he rushed down the stairs and threw himself in Sonny's arms.
Sonny held Michael close to him, but looked up at Carly with concern.
Something was off with her - and he wanted to know what it was. "Hey,
Tiger," Sonny said, pulling back and tickling Michael on the chin. "Can I come inside before we both catch a cold?"
"Come back in, Michael, and give Uncle Sonny a chance to breathe," Carly gently chastised her son, tugging him back inside. She rested her hands on his shoulders and forced herself to smile down at him. For her son, she would go to any lengths to keep him happy. Even pretend that everything was fine and dandy between her and Sonny.
Sonny walked in and shut the door behind him. He took off his coat and hung it up before turning back to Michael and grabbing him in his arms for another hug. "I missed you so much in the past few days! I'm sorry I haven't been around too much."
"I missed you too, Uncle Sonny," Michael seconded. "But I've been very busy taking care of Leticia and Mommy." He winked at Sonny.
Carly hid a smile.
Sonny looked up at Carly and noticed the curve of her lips and smiled back at her before turning his attention back to his son. "Good job, Michael," he praised. "And your Mom looks like you did a wonderful job."
Michael took Carly's hand and dragged her back over to the couch. "Mommy isn't feeling well today," he announced.
When Sonny glanced over at her, Carly's cheeks reddened. "I'm fine," she said hastily. "I just woke up feeling slightly groggy thismorning."
"Do you feel better now?" Sonny asked, coming over and reaching his hand out to touch Carly's skin.
Carly ducked his hand and jumped up. "I'm fine. Michael, didn't you color a picture this morning for Uncle Sonny?"
"Yes!" Michael got up and bounded from the room calling, "Be right back!"
Sonny chuckled and glanced at Carly after Michael left. "Are you sure you're okay? You look a little flushed and you seem a little . On edge, he wanted to say. "Stressed," he finally said.
Carly averted her eyes, trying to keep the anger growing within her in
check. "I'm fine," she lied, sounding as sincere as she could manage. "I've just been busy for the past few days. You know, getting my club ready to open."
Sonny nodded, not believing her for one second. "You realize you can't lie to me, right, Carly?"
Carly met his eyes. "Not here, not now, with Michael nearby."
Taken aback, Sonny took a step towards her. "What? Why?"
"Don't look so confused with me, Sonny," Carly snapped. "There's no need for it. I know everything, and you and Zander pretending isn't fooling anyone anymore."
"So Zander told you then?"
"No, Zander didn't tell me. He was too chicken. I overheard you yesterday when I brought Michael to see you." Carly paced around the living room, her anger boiling within her.
"You brought Michael to see me yesterday?" Sonny was confused again and
trying to keep up with her.
"Yes."
"I never saw you."
"Because I didn't stay, Sonny." Carly turned on him. "You expected me to stay and pretend to be happy after I heard that?"
Sonny was pleased when he heard Carly's words. So she didn't return Zander's feelings after all. For some reason Sonny couldn't explain, that made him happy. "I didn't know what to expect from you," he admitted. "I didn't know what your feelings were."
"I'll TELL you what my feelings are," Carly said snidely. "I HATE when
people go behind my back and do something that they know I will totally
dislike, especially when it affects me and possibly my son." She paused and narrowed her eyes at Sonny. "Especially when I am supposed to trust these people."
Sonny suddenly got the feeling that he and Carly weren't thinking on the same wavelength. "Uh, Carly, would you mind explaining what you're talking about?"
"You know what I'm talking about!" Carly yelled. She realized immediately how loud her voice was and softened. "Sorry, I don't mean to yell. I'm just very angry at you and Zander."
"At me?" Sonny was surprised. "What did I do?"
Carly couldn't believe what she was hearing. First Zander, and now Sonny? "I can't deal with this right now," she said, shaking her head. "Not with Michael so close, possibly listening to us."
As if on cue, Michael flew back in the room. "I colored this picture for you in school today, Uncle Sonny."
Sonny sat down on the couch, pulling Michael beside him. "You drew this just for me?"
"Yes," Michael answered proudly.
"This is the best picture I've ever seen," Sonny praised Michael. "Can you tell me about it?"
"That's you, Uncle Sonny. And me," Michael pointed out the figures. "And that's Mommy with you. Your arm is around her 'cause you still love her. I'm sitting in Mommy's lap 'cause we're a family."
Carly felt her eyes grow misty as she listened to her son and watched the two males bonding. Their heads were bent together and both were smiling with happiness. When their heads looked up, Zander looked over and smiled.....
Carly jumped with a start, letting out a soft cry. That wasn't Zander over there with Michael! It was Sonny! Now she was hallucinating! Thoughts started whirling in Carly's brain as she tried to decipher what she was feeling.
Sonny saw the wild look in Carly's eyes and knew it was time for them to talk. He got up and walked over to the stairs. "Leticia!" he called.
Seconds later Michael's nanny, Leticia Juarez, came down the stairs. "Hello, Mr. Corinthos," she said politely. "Can I help you with something?"
Sonny held up a hand to Leticia, who glanced over at Carly. Carly shrugged, her brows knit with curiosity herself.
Sonny knelt down and called Michael over to him. "Michael," he said
seriously to the boy. "I need you to do me a favor."
"What?" Michael asked, his eyes wide.
Sonny smiled, "I need you to take Leticia out to get some ice cream. Your mom and I need to have a grown up conversation alone."
"Are you gonna fight?"
"No, we're not going to fight," Sonny said quickly, not wanting Carly to butt in. He gave Carly a warning glance to keep her mouth shut.
Michael stared at Sonny for a long second. "Okay," he said. "But only if you promise me something."
Sonny looked surprised and Carly let out a low chuckle. "What promise do you want me to make, Michael?"
"Promise that you will come back for dinner sometime very soon."
Sonny hugged Michael tightly. "That's an easy promise to make. I will have dinner with you very soon, little man. Deal?"
"Deal."
Leticia got their jackets and a few minutes later they were gone.
"Now back to our conversation, Carly," Sonny said, glancing at his ex-wife, who was now sitting in a nearby chair.
"Please," she said coolly. "Do have a seat, Sonny. Unless there's something else in my life you want to run."
"Will you please explain what you mean?" Sonny's patience was wearing
extremely thin.
"You want me to explain? Fine, I will explain everything to you." Carly
leaned forward in her chair. "My good friend Zander and I have been getting closer and closer lately. He's been spending an awful lot of time here, but I never really questioned it before. I didn't think there was a reason to." She shot Sonny a pointed look before continuing, "Yesterday, Zander told me he had to go to a business meeting at the warehouse with some guy named Gus. After he left, I thought I'd surprise you and bring Michael to visit. When I got there, Michael wanted me to go inside and make sure you were in your office. I did, and I overheard Zander's voice. Naturally curious, I peeked in to see what he was doing in there. Why hadn't he told me he was going to see you?"
At that exact moment, Sonny knew exactly what was coming. He felt a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. "Of course, you couldn't just walk away from something that was none of your business."
"Why would I have? As far as I knew, Zander wasn't even supposed to be
there. So, because I was concerned for my supposed friend, I listened."
"And just what exactly did you hear, Carly?"
"All of it." Carly's voice grew weaker as a tear slid down her cheek. "Every sordid word."
"Tell me exactly what you heard," Sonny said sternly.
Carly looked up at him harshly, aimlessly wiping the tear away. "I heard you say what a good job he's doing, how well Michael and I are doing under his protection. I saw you hand him the envelope with the
money in it, saying there was a bonus because he had done so well." More tears streamed from her eyes.
"And?"
"And what?" Carly looked at him defiantly. "I left then. I'd heard enough. Besides.... I couldn't listen anymore." She hung her head, ashamed of the fact she was crying.
Now it was Sonny's turn to be angry. He sat in front of Carly, putting one hand on her arm and forcing her to look up at him with his other hand. "Carly, you're such a bonehead sometimes," he said with fondness in his voice. "If you'd stayed around and listened to the rest of the conversation, you'd only be mad at me right now."
"What do you mean?"
Sonny sighed and stood up, raking his fingers through his hair. "If you had stayed. You would have heard Zander refuse to take the money and tell me he didn't want me paying him to do a job that he wanted to do for free."
Carly frowned, "You're saying he gave you back the money? Why? And why did he lie to me in the first place?"
"I'm the one to blame for that. One of the conditions of the job was for him not to tell you. He wanted to, but you know how I am about things like that," Sonny grinned. "But the reason he gave me back the money is because ... he ... " Sonny trailed off with a sigh.
"He what?" Carly almost pounced on him.
"He's in love with you, Carly. Zander has fallen in love with you; he gave me back the money after telling me that he does want to protect you. But he doesn't want me paying him to do it. He wants to do it because he loves you and Michael."
Carly was touched at the sadness she noted in Sonny's face, but she was even more stunned by his words. "He's in love with me?" she squeaked.
Sonny nodded, "Yes."
Carly regarded Sonny carefully. "What do you think of that?"
Sonny shrugged. "What can I think? I mean, there's a part of me that wishes you would never move on," he flashed her a smile. "But that's not fair of me to wish."
"No, but at least it's honest," Carly said softly.
Sonny sat back down in front of her, taking her hands in his. "I just want you to be happy, Carly. And if that means you're with Zander, so be it." He was totally sincere, which again touched Carly. "How do you feel about him?"
Carly averted her eyes as she got up and walked around the room. She slipped her fingers to her mouth and unconsciously began biting her fingernails. "I don't know how I feel," she admitted after several long seconds of agonizing silence.
Sonny stood up and walked over to her, placing his hands on her shoulders and forcing her to look at him. "Let's start with what you do know," he said gently, knowing exactly what she felt by her reaction. He also knew that she would need to be prodded into admitting it, but once she did, she'd never be able to deny it again. "Are you in love with Zander, Carly?"
Carly met Sonny's eyes, her eyes full of fear and unshed tears. "Yes," she whispered, almost inaudible. "Yes, I'm in love with him."
"Then you do know what you feel."
Carly took a deep breath and slowly nodded her head. "That's probably why I reacted the way I did yesterday. I was so hurt that Zander was only spending time with me because you were paying him, Sonny," she confessed. "I couldn't understand why I felt so hurt; only that I had thought there was more of a connection between us. That we meant more to each other than an envelope of money."
"What do you want to do now that you know the truth?" Sonny asked.
Carly exhaled, the hair that had fallen towards her forehead blowing back. "Find him and apologize for tearing into him earlier today. Tell him I love him too and see what he says. He probably hates me right now."
Sonny stepped away from Carly, suddenly feeling weird being so close to her. She wasn't his anymore; she was Zander's now. It was something that he felt deep in his heart and it surprised him to acknowledge that feeling already. He like he had just lost something important to him, something he cherished more than he'd realized. "Zander doesn't hate you, Carly. And if he does, he's a fool. He lied to you because I told him; you have the right to be just as angry as him for hurting you, if you choose."
Carly was too caught up in her own thoughts now to pay much attention to Sonny. "I'd better go and talk to him." She strode to her closet and grabbed her jacket.
"Take more than that, Carly," Sonny warned. "It's snowing pretty hard out there right now."
Carly looked out the window and saw how bad it was. "I hope Michael and Leticia are okay," she frowned.
"I'll tell you what." Sonny dug in his pocket for his cell phone, "I will take care of Michael and Leticia while you go and see Zander. In fact, if you wait a few minutes, I'll get Max to come over here and drive you around until you find Zander."
"Thank you, Sonny," Carly was touched by his thoughtfulness. "But I'd better get going before I change my mind and realize I'm acting like some crazy teenager with a crush." She put on a scarf and some earmuffs and picked up a pair of gloves. "But I accept your offer to look after Michael and Leticia for me. Thanks." She kissed his cheek and left without another word.
Sonny watched her go, feeling her take a piece of his heart with her. He sat down on her couch and laid his head back. "To the end of Sonny and Carly," he whispered, gesturing at the ceiling.
Chapter Three
Carly groaned when her car stalled again. "Come on, car!" she muttered,
trying without success to start it up again. She was only about another five minutes away from Jake's and the effort to get where she was now had taken almost an hour. It had taken her twenty minutes to clean off her car, and then another twenty to drive halfway across town when her car stalled the first time. Ten minutes later she got it started and now it stalled again after running for only five minutes. Traffic was slower than a snail's pace due to the high winds and the force of the falling snow. The radio station Carly had on was cautioning everyone to stay inside and predicted that a blizzard was on its way to Port Charles. "Blizzard.... bah humbug," Carly said moodily. She sighed as she sat and contemplated her next move. Her heart was pounding with fear and excitement, wanting desperately to see Zander and confess her feelings for him and to apologize for her earlier behavior.
Carly opened up the car door and got out, grumbling as she hefted her purse to her shoulder and slipped her gloves on. She tightened the scarf and began the trek to Jake's. Once there, she slipped in the back entrance. It looked deserted there and Carly realized Jake must have closed early due to the weather. She checked her watch: five o'clock. Carly hoped Zander was in his room upstairs. She shook off her coat and all of her outer items and laid them on one of the tables and chairs downstairs. Shaking out her hair, Carly walked into the bathroom to check herself out in the mirror.
She groaned with displeasure when she saw her tangled, stringy hair and red cheeks. In her opinion, she looked horrible. "I wouldn't blame Zander if he sent me away on my bad looks alone," she muttered, digging around in her purse until she found her brush. She ran it through her hair until some of the tangles disappeared and the nodded, slightly
mollified. She left the bathroom and walked upstairs slowly, rehearsing what she would say in her head. "Zander, I am sorry for the way I treated you earlier," she whispered aloud on the way down the hallway to his room. Giving up on rehearsing, she stopped in front of his door and hesitated. What if he threw her out? She wasn't sure if she could handle rejection after she'd come all this way in the storm to see him. Finally she gathered enough courage and lightly knocked on his door.
Zander was inside his room, pacing. He'd walked from Carly's house back to his room at Jake's, seething in anger and trying to use his anger to get past his feelings for Carly. How dare she treat him like that? Even if she didn't return his feelings, he didn't deserve to be treated like an enemy. Zander was totally determined to chew Sonny out for even saying anything to Carly in the first place, once he calmed down slightly. He could understand Sonny not giving them his blessing, but that didn't explain his going and opening his mouth toCarly before Zander could say anything. Zander was so lost in this thoughts he didn't even hear the knock at his door at first. When he did, he scowled, wondering who was coming to see him in such bad weather. It was probably one of Sonny's cronies, coming to tell him the "boss" needed him for something. "I'll show Sonny what he can do with his jobs for me," he growled, striding towards the door and throwing it open. "Tell him I'm busy," he said, before he saw who it was. When he paused and saw his visitor was Carly, his face softened slightly. "Uh, sorry," he muttered, moving his eyes away from her. "I thought you were someone else."
Carly smiled, "Let me guess: You thought I was Johnny or Max, right?"
Zander felt his lips curve slightly. "Yeah, something like that." An
uncomfortable silence followed as Zander stared at his feet.
Carly knew it was going to be up to her to make the first move; probably all the first moves if Zander staring at his feet was any indication. "I suppose you're probably wondering why I'm here."
"Yeah."
"Can I come in?" This was going to be harder than she'd originally thought.
Zander moved back, not saying a word.
Carly walked inside and turned to face him, waiting while he shut the door. "I came over here to apologize to you, Zander."
That caught his attention. He looked up and focused his gaze on Carly. "Come again?"
Carly felt herself smile. "I came over here to apologize to you," she
repeated. "I treated you horribly earlier, and I didn't even explain why. Not that my reason was an excuse," she added quickly. "But I should have talked to you about it and given you a chance to explain a few things to me."
"Like what?" Zander asked, keeping his face stony.
Carly blushed and turned away from him. Could she do this? "Can we sit
down?" she asked after a moment's pause.
Zander nodded and sat down beside Carly on the bed, keeping himself as far away from her as possible.
"I was angry at you, Zander," she began.
"That much was clear," Zander responded. "But why? What did I do between yesterday and today?"
"After you left yesterday, I took Michael over to the warehouse to see
Sonny. Michael wanted to surprise Sonny, so he asked me to go and see if Sonny was in his office," she explained, keeping her eyes on him. "When I got there, I heard your voice and I was very surprised. You'd
said you had a meeting, but you said it was with your boss, not Sonny."
"I never said which boss it was with," Zander corrected, jumping in. He was more alert now, more responsive towards her and was listening intently to her.
"You never said it was Sonny either," Carly said gently. "And I knew you would have said it was Sonny unless you had a very good reason not to. So I was curious and sort of, uh," she began turning red at this point.
Zander gulped, a nervous feeling coming over him. "You listened to our
conversation?"
"Only a part of it," she assured him. A look of relief crossed his face, which made Carly smile. If he only knew what was coming. "I saw Sonny hand you an envelope and when you opened it, I saw there was money in it. I overheard Sonny thank you for doing such a good job "taking care" of Michael and me. I saw red, Zander. I had thought there was more between us than you simply looking after me for Sonny. I had thought we'd become friends in the past few weeks."
"But we had!" Zander cried.
Carly held up her hand. "Please, let me finish." Zander nodded and Carly continued, "I was so hurt and I ran. I brought Michael back home and spent the whole night building my anger at you and Sonny. I felt betrayed, lied to and hurt by the both of you. Both of whom I trusted so much. That's why I lashed out at you earlier, and I should've had the decency then to explain this all to you. But no, Carly never does anything logical, right?" Carly smiled.
Even Zander had to smile at that remark. "No one would ever accuse you of being normal," he agreed.
Carly knew she deserved that comment and nodded. "No, they wouldn't."
Zander noted how much calmer she seemed now. "So what happened to bring you over here?" he asked, offering her no explanations.
"Uh-uh," Carly shook her head. "You're not getting off that easily. I think you owe it to me to tell me why you lied to me."
Zander sighed and felt his chest tighten as he realized what that would
mean. He knew it was time to tell Carly the truth about his feelings towards her. He just hoped she wouldn't shove him out of her life; he knew he would never be able to bear that. "You're right," he said. "I owe you the truth, since you braved the storm to come all the way over here to apologize to me."
"I'm glad you see things my way," Carly teased, trying to lighten the mood. Zander looked like he was about to throw up. Carly realized he was nervous, which pleased her. She was glad that she meant that much to him; that he was nervous about her reaction to his words.
Zander gave her a half-smile and allowed it to fade before speaking, "When Sonny first came to me and told he me had a special job for me, I was so happy. I feel sometimes like I owe Sonny so much for all he's done for me. He's given me this great job, helped me out when Sorel was threatening me, gave me a place to live and paid for all my hospital expenses."
Carly nodded; she already knew all of this.
"I didn't mind that the job was to take care of you and Michael. You two are important to Sonny and since Sonny helped me protect Emily when she needed it, I figured I owed him the favor anyway. Sonny made it clear from the beginning that it was best not to tell you the details of why I was suddenly spending time with you. He also told me to ease into it, get to know you slowly and watch you from a distance."
"Kind of like pretending to be my friend?" Carly asked.
"No." He shook his head, "Being your friend was easy. But because Sonny
didn't want you knowing exactly what I was doing, he suggested that my
becoming a more regular part of your life was something that should happen gradually. I found that I loved spending time with you, Carly. I still do love spending time with you and I hope we can continue to be friends. I would really miss that," his face looked sad.
"Sonny told me that there was more," Carly said quietly.
Zander's heart pounded again; he'd thought he'd found away to avoid telling her the rest of it. "He did?"
"Yes. He told me you gave him back the money yesterday and quit."
"He didn't leave anything out, did he?" Zander muttered under his breath.
Carly sidled up to him, stopping just a few inches away from him. "Why did you do that, Zander?"
"I, uh, that is, er..."
Carly looked at him expectantly, not budging an inch.
"Fine," Zander sighed, getting up and walking around the room. Nervously, he ran his fingers through his hair, taking several quick breaths. "I got tired of lying to you, Carly. My feelings for you have grown stronger and stronger as time has gone on, especially after that kiss..." he trailed off, knowing he had basically just given it away. "What I mean is, I do want to be around you still. I want to continue spending all the time I can with you and Michael. But I don't want
to do it as Sonny's employee."
"What do you want to do it as, Zander?" Carly asked softly, standing up and walking towards him slowly.
"Your boyfriend," He answered quietly, his eyes never leaving hers.
Carly walked even closer to him, her lips melting into a slow smile. "Would it surprise you if I told you that I wanted it that way too?"
The look on his face answered her question immediately. "What?"
"Sonny told me how you felt before I came over here," she admitted, stopping in front of him, her eyes still locked with his. "And he got me to admit I felt the same way about you."
Zander felt his head spin and his heart felt like it would pop out of his chest at any moment? "You -- you -- you --"
Carly reached up and gently touched his cheek. "I'm in love with you too."
As Carly's face approached his, Zander's arms went out to encircle her and draw her closer to him. He closed his eyes as their lips met for the sweetest kiss Zander had ever had. Carly broke the kiss first, moving her head back to glance in Zander's eyes again.
Zander searched her face and was happy to realize that her words had been sincere. "Would it be inappropriate of me to scream with happiness right now?" he whispered to her, nuzzling her nose with his.
Carly clasped her arms around Zander's waist and shook her head. "No. Go right ahead."
Zander leaned his head back and let out a whoop of joy, causing Carly to laugh. "Now what?" Zander asked, staring down at her, marveling at how wonderful she felt in his arms.
Carly pulled him down on the bed and cuddled close to him. "We can neck for awhile if you want," she suggested with a grin. "Or," she continued as her stomach growled, "You can feed me. I'm starving - I haven't eaten anything since last night. I was too upset."
Zander stroked Carly's hair lightly, a dumb smile on his face. "Anything you want," he murmured. "In fact, why don't we go downstairs and see what Jake is cooking?"
Carly suddenly sat up and clapped her hand to her forehead. "I was so
nervous about seeing you, I totally didn't register anything!" she
exclaimed. "Jake's is closed due to the storm, I think."
Zander laced her fingers in his and began tugging her up. "Let's go take a peek," he said.
They headed downstairs and Zander let go of Carly's hand to go and
investigate in the kitchen. Carly glanced out the window and gasped in
surprise. There was tons of snow on the ground; it covered her car up to the door handles and it was still falling hard. "Look's like I'm stuck here until someone clears out this now," she commented as Zander returned from the kitchen.
"I don't have any complaints about that," Zander said, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind her.
Carly rested her head against his shoulder. "Neither do I," she said softly.
Zander rested his chin on top of her head and inhaled her sweet scent. "I was so scared to tell you how I felt," he confessed suddenly.
Carly turned in his arms, her hunger forgotten as her thought turned to
something else. "I know you were; I was scared too. Not to tell you, but to even admit it to myself." As Carly glanced into his eyes, she giggled, "I feel like such a novice at this."
"At dating?"
"If that's what you call it. But I want to take this slowly, Zander," she warned. "No sudden marriage proposals anything."
"I'm not sure if what I really want from you right now fits into that
category," Zander responded with a grin as his hands trailed down her body, pulling her closer to him.
Carly closed her eyes as Zander bent his head to kiss her, gently at first, and then more passionately as their feelings began to overtake them. Carly moved her fingers lazily up Zander's chest and then she
locked her arms around his neck. Her right hand twined in his hair as her lips pressed firmly against his.
Before things could go any further, Zander broke away. "I have an idea. I'll be right back," he said softly, letting go of her and walking over to the jukebox against the right wall. He inserted a quarter and selected a song to play. Moments later the first strains of a slow song began to play. Zander grinned at Carly and walked back over to her, "May I have this dance?"
Carly slid her fingers into his outstretched hand with a smile of her own. "I'd be honored."
Zander led her onto the dance floor and snaked his arms around her waist, pulling her body close to his. Carly rested her head on his shoulder and slid her own arms around Zander's neck. "This feels so nice," she murmured as her body began to sway with the music.
Zander inhaled the sweet scent of her, tightening his grasp around her
waist. "I feel like I've dreamed of this forever, Carly," he whispered in her ear. "You smell so sweet, so nice. Holding you against me, it feels so right."
Carly closed her eyes, her mind going hazy as her thoughts drifted away from everything but her and Zander and what they were doing at that exact moment. Her fingers began roaming across Zander's neck, down his back and slid under his shirt, where they began tracing hearts against his skin.
Zander closed his eyes and shivered lightly as he felt Carly's caresses. His own fingers unlocked themselves and his right hand slid around her bottom, crushing her against him. He rested his head atop of hers, murmuring her name over and over.
Carly rolled her head slowly under his, eliciting moans of pleasure from Zander. She smiled deviously as her fingers moved from his back to the front of his chest, lightly rubbing against his firm nipples before moving lower and twining themselves in the hair in the center. She felt her emotions flow through her veins, spreading out through every inch of her body in ways she hadn't felt since that night so long ago when she first came to Port Charles.
Zander felt Carly's growing desire and knew his own emotions matched hers. He opened his eyes and moved them around the room, searching for the perfect spot .. His eyes settled on the nearby pool table and he smiled as he began to gently propel her towards it.
As they moved, Carly clung tightly to Zander, raising her face to meet his. The music floated through her, bringing her passion to a surface in a way she'd never felt before, not even with Jason.
Zander gave Carly a feathery kiss at first, pressing more firmly when she clasped her hands around his neck and pressed her body up against his. He cinched his hands on either side of her waist and lifted her up, sitting her on the edge of the pool table. His fingers deftly unbuttoned her shirt, sliding it down from her shoulders and away from her body. He removed his mouth from hers and admired the luscious curves in her upper body. He lowered his lips to taste her skin, starting at her shoulders and moving slowly over to her neck and across her chest to the other shoulder.
Carly moaned as shivers of desire flowed through her body. Her fingers
snaked into Zander's hair and pressed his head against her skin, wanting to feel him against every part of her. She felt her hands move down to the edge of his shirt and she lifted it over his head. She stared in awe at his toned chest, the muscles that twitched when the sudden cool air hit. Carly slid her arms across his back, her fingernails lightly tracing designs into his back.
Zander moved his head back up to Carly's face, his tongue running across her chin, cheeks and forehead before settling once more on her lips. He traced them with his tongue and then pressed his lips against hers again, sliding his tongue inside her mouth and exploring all the crevices it found in there. His fingers stumbled clumsily against her back as he fought to unhook her bra. Finally succeeding, he quickly slid the straps down her arms and carefully removed the bra from her body before tossing it to the floor. His hands closed around each breast as their mouths continued to press against each other. Their breaths became shallow and Zander moved Carly back further onto the table and climbed atop of her. He broke the kiss and moved his mouth to her breasts, seizing her left nipple between his teeth and nibbling
gently. His tongue licked against the nipple, causing it to harden and then he suckled on it gently, fondling the other breast with his hand at the same time.
Carly moaned louder, muttering Zander's name as she writhed against him. Her hands slid down to his jeans and she fumbled with the button as she tried hard to concentrate on what she was doing as well as what Zander was doing to her body. She felt like she was on fire as she the button finally opened and she removed tugged on the legs of the jeans in order to remove them from Zander's body.
Zander moved his lips further down Carly's body to her abdomen, using his hands to help her remove the rest of his clothing. He then slid her pants and panties off her body, gasping with delight at the silky skin he found underneath her clothes. Not able to stop himself now, Zander ran his fingers up her legs to the soft folds of skin where her legs met. He slid his finger into her slowly, feeling how wet she was. He couldn't think, all he could do was feel.
Carly reached up and pulled Zander's face to hers again as she arched her body against him. His skin pressed against hers as he pressed his fingers into her again and again. He then slid them into his mouth, tasting her sweetness. "Taste how sweet you feel," he whispered, gently pressing his fingers into her mouth.
Carly suckled on his fingers seductively, her eyes never leaving his as she did so. Zander smiled and removed his hands, placing them on either side of her. "I want you so much, Carly. More than I've ever wanted anyone before," he said softly.
Carly tenderly brought his lips down to hers. "Then make me yours, Zander. Show me how much you want me."
That was all the invitation Zander needed. He plunged into Carly, entering her with a ferociousness he didn't think he was capable of. He gasped as her warmth engulfed him. Carly stiffened and held him there, not wanting to rush this. Zander glanced down at her questioningly.
"Slowly, Zander," Carly whispered. "Savor every second, every feeling of this moment." After several seconds, Carly relaxed her legs and wrapped them around his waist, giving him full access to her.
Zander began to move slowly within her, using one hand to palpatate her
breast. He kissed her passionately, seizing her mouth in a way that let her know who was in control now. Carly wrapped her arms around his chest and moved with him, keeping her paces with him.
Zander sped up, bringing his hardness right out of her before thrusting it back in again, causing Carly to gasp with pleasure. She thrust against him as hard as she could, closing her eyes and moaning loudly. "Zander! Oh, god!" Zander smiled and continued to thrust, calming them down slightly as their orgasms began to get closer and closer with every movement. Carly's nails dug into his back as she held herself as close to Zander as she could. Her body shook with every thrust, her chest rising and falling as her breaths shortened.
Zander curved his arms around Carly's back and began thrusting even harder and faster, hoping his heart could keep up with how fast he was moving. The walls were moving in his hazy glance and his ears were plugged as he felt himself about to explode.
Carly's body suddenly began to convulse and shake as she screamed and cried out Zander's name when she finally climaxed. Seemingly half a second after her, Zander felt his juices explode into Carly as his orgasm rocked him to the very core. He called out her name and thrust a few final times before collapsing beside her, breathing heavily.
Neither one of them was able to speak for several minutes as both tried to catch their breaths. Their bodies were damp with sweat and Zander was still inside of Carly, his arm curved around her back holding her close to him. Finally, Carly lifted her head slightly and peeked at Zander, "All I have to say to that is WOW."
Zander's lips curved into a grin and he pulled her closer to him, though he kept his eyes closed. "I don't even have words to describe that, Carly. I never would've dreamed that it could be that good," he whispered.
"I'm glad, Zander." Carly settled her head on his chest with a contented sigh. "It just keeps getting better from this point onward."
"I can't wait, Carly," Zander replied, wrapping his other arm around her and kissing the top of her head. "You know, most people hate snow and blizzards, but I'm finding that I really like them."
"Why?"
"Because for the rest of my life, I will know that it was a blizzard that first brought us together. It's a blizzard of love," he chuckled.
Carly laughed too, "That's right. A Blizzard of Love."
~ January 8th, 2002 ~
"Look, Zander," Carly Benson said to her friend, spinning around in a
circle, her arms open wide. "I'm almost ready to open. Another few weeks, at most."
Zander Smith felt his mouth curve into a smile as Carly's happiness radiated onto him. "You've done it, Carly. You should be proud of yourself. You've done this with almost no help."
Carly snorted. "Yeah, right. Where would I be right now without you?"
"Probably in much better shape," Zander teased.
Carly chuckled, "Whatever, pal." She noticed a strand of hair had fallen onto Zander's forehead and gently swiped it away for him.
Zander stood still, his mind frozen; feeling like her fingers had burned his forehead where she touched it.
"Something wrong?" she asked, noticing the startled look on his face.
"No," Zander replied quickly. "Nothing's wrong. I just remembered that I have an appointment later today. I had totally forgotten before now."
"What appointment?" Carly asked, trying to sound interested, though her mind was not really on their conversation.
"Uh, er, that was - " Zander stumbled, trying quickly to come up with
something.
Carly glanced over at him, suddenly noticing his stammering. "I thought you just remembered?"
"It's something at the warehouse." Zander forced a smile. "I can't remember exactly what right now, but I know it's something. So," he decided to change the subject. "Have you decided on a name for the club yet?"
"Not yet," Carly responded. She smiled again as she looked around her at the newly painted walls. She took a deep breath. "Doesn't it smell fresh and new?"
"Actually, it smells like wet paint."
Carly smacked Zander's arm playfully. "Very funny." Impulsively, she hugged him.
Surprised, Zander had to fight his body not to respond to Carly's touch the way it immediately wanted to. He slipped his arms around her waist and rested his head against hers. "What's this for?" he asked, trying to keep his voice normal.
"For being such a wonderful friend to me, Zander," Carly said seriously, pulling away. "I've never had a real friend since Jason left Port Charles. It's nice to have someone to talk to again. To be able to just be me. I didn't have that with Sonny or AJ or Tony. Only with Jason, and now you."
Zander was pleased and slightly flattered at her words. "I'm glad I make you feel that way, Carly. You should have someone that you can be honest with. It's like I was able to be with --" He trailed off, hurt evident in his eyes.
"With Emily," Carly finished for him, lightly touching his arm. "I'm sorry, Zander. I know it still hurts for you to think about her."
"There's nothing for you to be sorry about," Zander replied, forcing a
smile. "Emily is a part of my past. And yes, I felt that way with Emily. Before I met Emily, I was such a rotten kid. I'd do such horrible things, especially being hired by Sorel. But Emily changed all that. She made me want to be a better person, someone that she could be proud of. And now, I am. I've become someone totally different. And now there's a new person that makes me feel like Emily used to."
"Who?" Carly asked.
Zander realized he'd said too much and was relieved when his cell phone
rang. "Ah, saved by the bell," he teased. He grabbed his phone and pressed the button. "Hello?"
"Zander, it's Sonny." His boss' voice filled his ear. Not only was Sonny Corinthos his boss, but he was also Carly's ex-husband.
"Hey." Zander kept his voice light and turned away from Carly so she
couldn't see his face. While Carly was aware that Zander had loyalties to Sonny and that he worked at Sonny's warehouse, she wasn't aware of the extra little assignments Sonny paid him to do on the side. 'Especially the one where he pays me to watch over Carly' Zander thought. 'She'd hate me if she ever found that out.' Which was why Zander was determined never to let her find out about that. "What's up?"
"I just wanted to make sure you remembered our meeting later," Sonny
answered.
"I did remember it," Zander said carefully. "And I'll be there in about
fifteen minutes. I'm leaving now." He checked his watch as an added measure.
"Are you with Carly now?" Sonny asked.
"Yeah."
"Okay. See you when you get here." Sonny hung up.
Zander paused for a moment longer. "Thanks for reminding me, Gus. I'll see you as soon as I can. Bye." He closed his cell phone and turned back to Carly.
"Have to go to your meeting now?" Carly asked immediately.
"Were you spying on me, Miss Benson?" Zander asked, trying to paste a
serious look on his face.
Carly blushed. "Not intentionally, really. I was going to leave the room, but it didn't seem.." Carly trailed off when she noticed the smirk on Zander's face. "You're just kidding, aren't you?"
Zander nodded and laughed helplessly. "You should've seen your face," he gasped. "It was totally priceless!"
"I'll priceless you!" Carly growled, raising her fist in mock anger.
Zander ducked his head. "A great time for a graceful exit," he said,
grabbing his jacket. "I'll see you around."
Carly nodded and watch as Zander disappeared from the club. "See you
around," she echoed. Her eyes fell on the time and she gasped. "I was going to take Michael to see Sonny today! I'd better get going, or it's not going to be much of a surprise."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
As Zander headed towards Sonny's, his mind began whirling. "The first thing I'm going to tell Sonny is that this job is over. I'm in love with Carly, and I want to pursue that. How can I do that if Sonny is paying me to be around her? She'd hate me just on principle." Zander smiled as he thought of Carly. So beautiful, and smart and especially intelligent. She was a ball of fire, but one that Zander definitely wanted around on a more permanent basis.
He arrived at Sonny's office at the warehouse and knocked on the door. "Come in!" Sonny called.
Zander walked inside, leaving the door open. "Hey, Sonny."
Sonny smiled his usual half-grin at Zander. "Sorry I haven't seen you much lately; I've been busy," he said.
Zander nodded and sat down in the chair in front of Sonny's desk. "Yeah, I've noticed."
Sonny knit his eyebrows together. "Is something wrong?"
Zander looked uncomfortable. "I need to talk to you about something."
"It sounds important," Sonny observed, studying Zander.
"It is," Zander confirmed.
"Okay. But before you start, I have something for you."
"I don't want anything from -- " Zander began to object.
"Relax." Sonny smirked. "It's not something you haven't earned." He reached into his desk drawer and lifted out an envelope. He extended it to Zander. "With my thanks."
Zander opened the envelope and saw that it was full of money. "Sonny," he began.
Neither Zander nor Sonny heard the footsteps coming towards the office or saw Carly as she stood just off to the side of Sonny's office. She hadn't intended to eavesdrop, but she'd told Michael to wait outside and she'd let him know when it was time to surprise Uncle Sonny. And now that she was at Sonny's office, she was surprised to hear Zander's voice talking with Sonny. What was he doing there? And why hadn't he told her the truth about whom he was meeting with? She wondered about the money Sonny was giving Zander. What was it for? And why hadn't Zander told her he was doing an extra job for Sonny?
"I know it's more than we agreed on, Zander," Sonny said, waving away
Zander's objections. "But you've done such a good job keeping your eye out for Carly that I thought a little extra was in order."
Carly's heart stopped at Sonny's words. THAT was the reason Zander had been spending all that time with her? Because Sonny was paying him to? A lone tear ran down her right cheek as she felt her heart split in two. "Bastard," she muttered before turning and leaving. One thing Carly was sure of, Zander Smith was not going to make a fool out of her anymore. Carly Benson needed no man to take care of her, and she was going to prove that.
Zander and Sonny were totally unaware of what Carly just heard and continued their conversation. "Sonny, I can't take this," Zander said after a moment's pause, his heart pounding.
"Consider it a bonus," Sonny offered.
Zander shook his head. "That's not what I mean, Sonny. I can't take any of this money. Not even one cent." He placed the envelope back on the desk.
"What? Why?"
Zander bit his lip for a moment and then expelled a breath. "Because I'm in love with Carly, Sonny. I came here today to tell you that. God help me, I've fallen in love with your ex-wife. And because of that, I can't take money from you to be around her. I want to be around her, spend time with her, and look out for her and Michael. I don't want to be paid by you to take care of the woman I love. Carly would never forgive either of us for that."
Sonny had a look of surprise on his face. "Well," he said, expelling his own breath. "This is certainly not what I expected." He eyed Zander sternly. "I don't really know what to say to you, Zander."
"There's nothing you can say, Sonny." Zander smiled, feeling like a weight had been lifted off his chest. "I didn't expect for this to happen. I even tried to stop it when I first began feeling it happening. But," he shook his head. "There was nothing I could do. Carly, she - well, she's the first person since Emily that has made me feel good about myself. She makes me want to do good things, to make her proud."
"Okay, stop there," Sonny said, his eyebrows knitted together with a frown. "What do you want from me?"
"Nothing," Zander said honestly. "I just wanted to let you know how I felt and to let you know that I no longer want this particular job from you. I will continue to look out for Carly, make no mistake, but not as your employer."
"I suppose you expect my blessing."
Zander stood up and shook his head. "Actually, no, I don't. No offense,
Sonny, but I don't care if I have your blessing or not. I'm not asking your permission to love Carly. I couldn't change my feelings for her now if I tried. But I am asking you to understand my feelings and respect them."
Sonny didn't say anything, but he admired Zander's guts and honesty. "Go away with you now," he said with a wave of his hand. "I need some time to think about this."
Zander nodded. "I'll talk to you later." He turned and left.
Sonny watched him go with a shake of his head.
Chapter Two
~ January 9th, 2002 ~
Zander whistled to himself as he walked up the front steps to Carly's house. Today was the day: he was going to tell Carly the truth about how he felt about her. As he was almost at her door, Zander felt his heart begin to pound. He broke out into a nervous sweat and wiped his hands on the side of his pants. "Take it easy, man," he told himself. He inhaled a deep breath and then exhaled it. "What are you afraid of?" But he knew the answer. Zander was afraid of rejection. Terrified of it, actually. Especially after what happened with Emily.
Zander shivered suddenly and looked up at the sky. It was snowing harder today than it had been for the last few days. Zander had heard on the radio that morning that a storm was heading their way sometime in the next day or so. He hoped it wouldn't be too bad, as Zander
hated snow. Suddenly Zander shook his and laughed. He decided to stop
stalling and take the plunge. Raising his hand, he knocked on the door.
Carly came to the door after several seconds. She glanced Zander over for a long moment before speaking. "Can I help you?" she asked icily.
Zander was totally unprepared for the tone of her voice. The smile faded from his face and he knit his eyebrows together. "I need to talk to you," he said, keeping his tone light. "May I come in?"
"No."
"Excuse me?"
"No, Zander, you may not come in," Carly's eyes were full of fire.
"Carly, is something wrong?" Zander asked.
Carly laughed hollowly. Zander shuddered at the sound. "Why would anything be wrong, Zander? Do you know something that I don't?"
Zander backed up a few steps. "Maybe I should go -"
"Go? Yes, Zander, that's a good idea. Go." Carly came outside and shut the door behind her. Wrapping her arms about herself, she walked closer to Zander. "Do me a favor and go. And don't ever come back."
"What? Why?" Now Zander was really surprised.
"Why? Don't you know why?" Carly couldn't believe her ears.
"No, I don't know, but I DO know that you're acting kind of strange." Zander was afraid of the look in Carly's eyes. She looked like she could easily strangle him without a second thought.
Carly smiled as sweetly as she could manage. "You've done such a good job taking care of me, Zander," she purred, switching tactics. "In fact, you must be so totally tired of being around me and Michael all the time. A married woman and her son must bore you so."
"N-n-n-n-no," Zander stammered, caught off guard at her sudden change in mood. "I'm not bored - You don't bore me."
Carly's eyes bored into Zander's. "Why don't you go back to doing your real job, Zander? Sonny must wonder where you are all the time."
Zander felt his face become hot and knew his cheeks were flaming. "N-n-no, he doesn't. Sonny knows where I am at all times."
Carly raised her eyebrows. "And he's okay with you spending all your time over here? With his wife? Neglecting your other jobs? Wow, I've never known Sonny to be that generous when it comes to business."
Zander knew now that something had happened between the previous evening and that morning. Had Sonny told Carly how Zander felt about him? He probably had, and Carly obviously didn't return his feelings.
Zander felt his heart cracking into two pieces as he saw the hate in her eyes. What he didn't know was that beneath the hatred Carly was spewing was hurt. He noticed Carly's teeth chattering and wanted to reach out and keep her warm, but didn't dare.
Carly was extremely hurt but was determined not to show it to anyone,
especially not Zander. She'd never give him the satisfaction of knowing how his actions had hurt her.
"I don't know how Sonny feels about it," Zander said lamely. "Or how it
affects his business. I've never been privy to that sort of information, Carly." Pride was seeping into Zander's voice now. He didn't like the way she was treating him, no matter what the reason. If she didn't return his feelings, that was fine, but Zander didn't want to be attacked. "But if he hasn't said anything to me about it, I don't know why it concerns you so much."
Carly narrowed her eyes. "Because you're always here," she hissed, shivering from the cold. "And that affects me and my life, as well as my son's life, Zander. Try thinking of someone else's feelings for a chance instead of your own, or Sonny's."
"That was a cheap shot, Carly, and it was totally unfair. For the last few weeks all I've cared about are your feelings and Michael's. I haven't considered Sonny's feelings or even my own as much as I have yours and your son's. I've been there to stop you from doing some of your crazy, stupid schemes that you normally do. You know, the ones where you don't think first? Actually, that seems to happen all the time, doesn't it?"
Carly whistled. "Touché, Zander. Now who's taking cheap shots?"
"Just repaying the favor, Carly," Zander shot back. "I don't know where you suddenly developed this major change in attitude between yesterday and today or why, but I have done nothing to deserve this from you. Not only that, but I won't stand here and take this crap any longer. Have a nice life, Ms. Benson."
Carly watched as Zander turned and left. "You have a nice life too, Zander! And please, don't worry about me! I can take care of myself just fine!" She went back inside and slammed the door as hard as she could, shivering terribly. It was colder outside than it looked, and her teeth were clattering. Carly knew that part of her was shaking from the anger she was feeling. Now that she was inside and by herself, Carly allowed her muscles to relax some.
Carly walked over to her couch and collapsed on it, tucking her legs beneath her and clutching a throw pillow to her chest. Her lips curled into a sad frown and her eyes clouded over as she recounted the scene she'd just had in front of her house. "Why does it hurt so much?" she asked herself, brushing away the two tears that streaked down her cheek.
** knock, knock **
Carly stood up and walked to her front door again, her face stony. She was prepared to tell Zander off if it was him. Throwing back the door, Carly opened her mouth and ... "Sonny!" She was surprised to see him standing on her doorstep. Suddenly Carly realized that not only was she angry at Zander, but she was angry with Sonny too.
"Carly," Sonny nodded at her and half-smiled. "May I come in?"
It was on the tip of her tongue to say the same thing to Sonny that she'd said to Zander, but her son's arrival quickly stopped her.
"Uncle Sonny!" Michael cried as he rushed down the stairs and threw himself in Sonny's arms.
Sonny held Michael close to him, but looked up at Carly with concern.
Something was off with her - and he wanted to know what it was. "Hey,
Tiger," Sonny said, pulling back and tickling Michael on the chin. "Can I come inside before we both catch a cold?"
"Come back in, Michael, and give Uncle Sonny a chance to breathe," Carly gently chastised her son, tugging him back inside. She rested her hands on his shoulders and forced herself to smile down at him. For her son, she would go to any lengths to keep him happy. Even pretend that everything was fine and dandy between her and Sonny.
Sonny walked in and shut the door behind him. He took off his coat and hung it up before turning back to Michael and grabbing him in his arms for another hug. "I missed you so much in the past few days! I'm sorry I haven't been around too much."
"I missed you too, Uncle Sonny," Michael seconded. "But I've been very busy taking care of Leticia and Mommy." He winked at Sonny.
Carly hid a smile.
Sonny looked up at Carly and noticed the curve of her lips and smiled back at her before turning his attention back to his son. "Good job, Michael," he praised. "And your Mom looks like you did a wonderful job."
Michael took Carly's hand and dragged her back over to the couch. "Mommy isn't feeling well today," he announced.
When Sonny glanced over at her, Carly's cheeks reddened. "I'm fine," she said hastily. "I just woke up feeling slightly groggy thismorning."
"Do you feel better now?" Sonny asked, coming over and reaching his hand out to touch Carly's skin.
Carly ducked his hand and jumped up. "I'm fine. Michael, didn't you color a picture this morning for Uncle Sonny?"
"Yes!" Michael got up and bounded from the room calling, "Be right back!"
Sonny chuckled and glanced at Carly after Michael left. "Are you sure you're okay? You look a little flushed and you seem a little . On edge, he wanted to say. "Stressed," he finally said.
Carly averted her eyes, trying to keep the anger growing within her in
check. "I'm fine," she lied, sounding as sincere as she could manage. "I've just been busy for the past few days. You know, getting my club ready to open."
Sonny nodded, not believing her for one second. "You realize you can't lie to me, right, Carly?"
Carly met his eyes. "Not here, not now, with Michael nearby."
Taken aback, Sonny took a step towards her. "What? Why?"
"Don't look so confused with me, Sonny," Carly snapped. "There's no need for it. I know everything, and you and Zander pretending isn't fooling anyone anymore."
"So Zander told you then?"
"No, Zander didn't tell me. He was too chicken. I overheard you yesterday when I brought Michael to see you." Carly paced around the living room, her anger boiling within her.
"You brought Michael to see me yesterday?" Sonny was confused again and
trying to keep up with her.
"Yes."
"I never saw you."
"Because I didn't stay, Sonny." Carly turned on him. "You expected me to stay and pretend to be happy after I heard that?"
Sonny was pleased when he heard Carly's words. So she didn't return Zander's feelings after all. For some reason Sonny couldn't explain, that made him happy. "I didn't know what to expect from you," he admitted. "I didn't know what your feelings were."
"I'll TELL you what my feelings are," Carly said snidely. "I HATE when
people go behind my back and do something that they know I will totally
dislike, especially when it affects me and possibly my son." She paused and narrowed her eyes at Sonny. "Especially when I am supposed to trust these people."
Sonny suddenly got the feeling that he and Carly weren't thinking on the same wavelength. "Uh, Carly, would you mind explaining what you're talking about?"
"You know what I'm talking about!" Carly yelled. She realized immediately how loud her voice was and softened. "Sorry, I don't mean to yell. I'm just very angry at you and Zander."
"At me?" Sonny was surprised. "What did I do?"
Carly couldn't believe what she was hearing. First Zander, and now Sonny? "I can't deal with this right now," she said, shaking her head. "Not with Michael so close, possibly listening to us."
As if on cue, Michael flew back in the room. "I colored this picture for you in school today, Uncle Sonny."
Sonny sat down on the couch, pulling Michael beside him. "You drew this just for me?"
"Yes," Michael answered proudly.
"This is the best picture I've ever seen," Sonny praised Michael. "Can you tell me about it?"
"That's you, Uncle Sonny. And me," Michael pointed out the figures. "And that's Mommy with you. Your arm is around her 'cause you still love her. I'm sitting in Mommy's lap 'cause we're a family."
Carly felt her eyes grow misty as she listened to her son and watched the two males bonding. Their heads were bent together and both were smiling with happiness. When their heads looked up, Zander looked over and smiled.....
Carly jumped with a start, letting out a soft cry. That wasn't Zander over there with Michael! It was Sonny! Now she was hallucinating! Thoughts started whirling in Carly's brain as she tried to decipher what she was feeling.
Sonny saw the wild look in Carly's eyes and knew it was time for them to talk. He got up and walked over to the stairs. "Leticia!" he called.
Seconds later Michael's nanny, Leticia Juarez, came down the stairs. "Hello, Mr. Corinthos," she said politely. "Can I help you with something?"
Sonny held up a hand to Leticia, who glanced over at Carly. Carly shrugged, her brows knit with curiosity herself.
Sonny knelt down and called Michael over to him. "Michael," he said
seriously to the boy. "I need you to do me a favor."
"What?" Michael asked, his eyes wide.
Sonny smiled, "I need you to take Leticia out to get some ice cream. Your mom and I need to have a grown up conversation alone."
"Are you gonna fight?"
"No, we're not going to fight," Sonny said quickly, not wanting Carly to butt in. He gave Carly a warning glance to keep her mouth shut.
Michael stared at Sonny for a long second. "Okay," he said. "But only if you promise me something."
Sonny looked surprised and Carly let out a low chuckle. "What promise do you want me to make, Michael?"
"Promise that you will come back for dinner sometime very soon."
Sonny hugged Michael tightly. "That's an easy promise to make. I will have dinner with you very soon, little man. Deal?"
"Deal."
Leticia got their jackets and a few minutes later they were gone.
"Now back to our conversation, Carly," Sonny said, glancing at his ex-wife, who was now sitting in a nearby chair.
"Please," she said coolly. "Do have a seat, Sonny. Unless there's something else in my life you want to run."
"Will you please explain what you mean?" Sonny's patience was wearing
extremely thin.
"You want me to explain? Fine, I will explain everything to you." Carly
leaned forward in her chair. "My good friend Zander and I have been getting closer and closer lately. He's been spending an awful lot of time here, but I never really questioned it before. I didn't think there was a reason to." She shot Sonny a pointed look before continuing, "Yesterday, Zander told me he had to go to a business meeting at the warehouse with some guy named Gus. After he left, I thought I'd surprise you and bring Michael to visit. When I got there, Michael wanted me to go inside and make sure you were in your office. I did, and I overheard Zander's voice. Naturally curious, I peeked in to see what he was doing in there. Why hadn't he told me he was going to see you?"
At that exact moment, Sonny knew exactly what was coming. He felt a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. "Of course, you couldn't just walk away from something that was none of your business."
"Why would I have? As far as I knew, Zander wasn't even supposed to be
there. So, because I was concerned for my supposed friend, I listened."
"And just what exactly did you hear, Carly?"
"All of it." Carly's voice grew weaker as a tear slid down her cheek. "Every sordid word."
"Tell me exactly what you heard," Sonny said sternly.
Carly looked up at him harshly, aimlessly wiping the tear away. "I heard you say what a good job he's doing, how well Michael and I are doing under his protection. I saw you hand him the envelope with the
money in it, saying there was a bonus because he had done so well." More tears streamed from her eyes.
"And?"
"And what?" Carly looked at him defiantly. "I left then. I'd heard enough. Besides.... I couldn't listen anymore." She hung her head, ashamed of the fact she was crying.
Now it was Sonny's turn to be angry. He sat in front of Carly, putting one hand on her arm and forcing her to look up at him with his other hand. "Carly, you're such a bonehead sometimes," he said with fondness in his voice. "If you'd stayed around and listened to the rest of the conversation, you'd only be mad at me right now."
"What do you mean?"
Sonny sighed and stood up, raking his fingers through his hair. "If you had stayed. You would have heard Zander refuse to take the money and tell me he didn't want me paying him to do a job that he wanted to do for free."
Carly frowned, "You're saying he gave you back the money? Why? And why did he lie to me in the first place?"
"I'm the one to blame for that. One of the conditions of the job was for him not to tell you. He wanted to, but you know how I am about things like that," Sonny grinned. "But the reason he gave me back the money is because ... he ... " Sonny trailed off with a sigh.
"He what?" Carly almost pounced on him.
"He's in love with you, Carly. Zander has fallen in love with you; he gave me back the money after telling me that he does want to protect you. But he doesn't want me paying him to do it. He wants to do it because he loves you and Michael."
Carly was touched at the sadness she noted in Sonny's face, but she was even more stunned by his words. "He's in love with me?" she squeaked.
Sonny nodded, "Yes."
Carly regarded Sonny carefully. "What do you think of that?"
Sonny shrugged. "What can I think? I mean, there's a part of me that wishes you would never move on," he flashed her a smile. "But that's not fair of me to wish."
"No, but at least it's honest," Carly said softly.
Sonny sat back down in front of her, taking her hands in his. "I just want you to be happy, Carly. And if that means you're with Zander, so be it." He was totally sincere, which again touched Carly. "How do you feel about him?"
Carly averted her eyes as she got up and walked around the room. She slipped her fingers to her mouth and unconsciously began biting her fingernails. "I don't know how I feel," she admitted after several long seconds of agonizing silence.
Sonny stood up and walked over to her, placing his hands on her shoulders and forcing her to look at him. "Let's start with what you do know," he said gently, knowing exactly what she felt by her reaction. He also knew that she would need to be prodded into admitting it, but once she did, she'd never be able to deny it again. "Are you in love with Zander, Carly?"
Carly met Sonny's eyes, her eyes full of fear and unshed tears. "Yes," she whispered, almost inaudible. "Yes, I'm in love with him."
"Then you do know what you feel."
Carly took a deep breath and slowly nodded her head. "That's probably why I reacted the way I did yesterday. I was so hurt that Zander was only spending time with me because you were paying him, Sonny," she confessed. "I couldn't understand why I felt so hurt; only that I had thought there was more of a connection between us. That we meant more to each other than an envelope of money."
"What do you want to do now that you know the truth?" Sonny asked.
Carly exhaled, the hair that had fallen towards her forehead blowing back. "Find him and apologize for tearing into him earlier today. Tell him I love him too and see what he says. He probably hates me right now."
Sonny stepped away from Carly, suddenly feeling weird being so close to her. She wasn't his anymore; she was Zander's now. It was something that he felt deep in his heart and it surprised him to acknowledge that feeling already. He like he had just lost something important to him, something he cherished more than he'd realized. "Zander doesn't hate you, Carly. And if he does, he's a fool. He lied to you because I told him; you have the right to be just as angry as him for hurting you, if you choose."
Carly was too caught up in her own thoughts now to pay much attention to Sonny. "I'd better go and talk to him." She strode to her closet and grabbed her jacket.
"Take more than that, Carly," Sonny warned. "It's snowing pretty hard out there right now."
Carly looked out the window and saw how bad it was. "I hope Michael and Leticia are okay," she frowned.
"I'll tell you what." Sonny dug in his pocket for his cell phone, "I will take care of Michael and Leticia while you go and see Zander. In fact, if you wait a few minutes, I'll get Max to come over here and drive you around until you find Zander."
"Thank you, Sonny," Carly was touched by his thoughtfulness. "But I'd better get going before I change my mind and realize I'm acting like some crazy teenager with a crush." She put on a scarf and some earmuffs and picked up a pair of gloves. "But I accept your offer to look after Michael and Leticia for me. Thanks." She kissed his cheek and left without another word.
Sonny watched her go, feeling her take a piece of his heart with her. He sat down on her couch and laid his head back. "To the end of Sonny and Carly," he whispered, gesturing at the ceiling.
Chapter Three
Carly groaned when her car stalled again. "Come on, car!" she muttered,
trying without success to start it up again. She was only about another five minutes away from Jake's and the effort to get where she was now had taken almost an hour. It had taken her twenty minutes to clean off her car, and then another twenty to drive halfway across town when her car stalled the first time. Ten minutes later she got it started and now it stalled again after running for only five minutes. Traffic was slower than a snail's pace due to the high winds and the force of the falling snow. The radio station Carly had on was cautioning everyone to stay inside and predicted that a blizzard was on its way to Port Charles. "Blizzard.... bah humbug," Carly said moodily. She sighed as she sat and contemplated her next move. Her heart was pounding with fear and excitement, wanting desperately to see Zander and confess her feelings for him and to apologize for her earlier behavior.
Carly opened up the car door and got out, grumbling as she hefted her purse to her shoulder and slipped her gloves on. She tightened the scarf and began the trek to Jake's. Once there, she slipped in the back entrance. It looked deserted there and Carly realized Jake must have closed early due to the weather. She checked her watch: five o'clock. Carly hoped Zander was in his room upstairs. She shook off her coat and all of her outer items and laid them on one of the tables and chairs downstairs. Shaking out her hair, Carly walked into the bathroom to check herself out in the mirror.
She groaned with displeasure when she saw her tangled, stringy hair and red cheeks. In her opinion, she looked horrible. "I wouldn't blame Zander if he sent me away on my bad looks alone," she muttered, digging around in her purse until she found her brush. She ran it through her hair until some of the tangles disappeared and the nodded, slightly
mollified. She left the bathroom and walked upstairs slowly, rehearsing what she would say in her head. "Zander, I am sorry for the way I treated you earlier," she whispered aloud on the way down the hallway to his room. Giving up on rehearsing, she stopped in front of his door and hesitated. What if he threw her out? She wasn't sure if she could handle rejection after she'd come all this way in the storm to see him. Finally she gathered enough courage and lightly knocked on his door.
Zander was inside his room, pacing. He'd walked from Carly's house back to his room at Jake's, seething in anger and trying to use his anger to get past his feelings for Carly. How dare she treat him like that? Even if she didn't return his feelings, he didn't deserve to be treated like an enemy. Zander was totally determined to chew Sonny out for even saying anything to Carly in the first place, once he calmed down slightly. He could understand Sonny not giving them his blessing, but that didn't explain his going and opening his mouth toCarly before Zander could say anything. Zander was so lost in this thoughts he didn't even hear the knock at his door at first. When he did, he scowled, wondering who was coming to see him in such bad weather. It was probably one of Sonny's cronies, coming to tell him the "boss" needed him for something. "I'll show Sonny what he can do with his jobs for me," he growled, striding towards the door and throwing it open. "Tell him I'm busy," he said, before he saw who it was. When he paused and saw his visitor was Carly, his face softened slightly. "Uh, sorry," he muttered, moving his eyes away from her. "I thought you were someone else."
Carly smiled, "Let me guess: You thought I was Johnny or Max, right?"
Zander felt his lips curve slightly. "Yeah, something like that." An
uncomfortable silence followed as Zander stared at his feet.
Carly knew it was going to be up to her to make the first move; probably all the first moves if Zander staring at his feet was any indication. "I suppose you're probably wondering why I'm here."
"Yeah."
"Can I come in?" This was going to be harder than she'd originally thought.
Zander moved back, not saying a word.
Carly walked inside and turned to face him, waiting while he shut the door. "I came over here to apologize to you, Zander."
That caught his attention. He looked up and focused his gaze on Carly. "Come again?"
Carly felt herself smile. "I came over here to apologize to you," she
repeated. "I treated you horribly earlier, and I didn't even explain why. Not that my reason was an excuse," she added quickly. "But I should have talked to you about it and given you a chance to explain a few things to me."
"Like what?" Zander asked, keeping his face stony.
Carly blushed and turned away from him. Could she do this? "Can we sit
down?" she asked after a moment's pause.
Zander nodded and sat down beside Carly on the bed, keeping himself as far away from her as possible.
"I was angry at you, Zander," she began.
"That much was clear," Zander responded. "But why? What did I do between yesterday and today?"
"After you left yesterday, I took Michael over to the warehouse to see
Sonny. Michael wanted to surprise Sonny, so he asked me to go and see if Sonny was in his office," she explained, keeping her eyes on him. "When I got there, I heard your voice and I was very surprised. You'd
said you had a meeting, but you said it was with your boss, not Sonny."
"I never said which boss it was with," Zander corrected, jumping in. He was more alert now, more responsive towards her and was listening intently to her.
"You never said it was Sonny either," Carly said gently. "And I knew you would have said it was Sonny unless you had a very good reason not to. So I was curious and sort of, uh," she began turning red at this point.
Zander gulped, a nervous feeling coming over him. "You listened to our
conversation?"
"Only a part of it," she assured him. A look of relief crossed his face, which made Carly smile. If he only knew what was coming. "I saw Sonny hand you an envelope and when you opened it, I saw there was money in it. I overheard Sonny thank you for doing such a good job "taking care" of Michael and me. I saw red, Zander. I had thought there was more between us than you simply looking after me for Sonny. I had thought we'd become friends in the past few weeks."
"But we had!" Zander cried.
Carly held up her hand. "Please, let me finish." Zander nodded and Carly continued, "I was so hurt and I ran. I brought Michael back home and spent the whole night building my anger at you and Sonny. I felt betrayed, lied to and hurt by the both of you. Both of whom I trusted so much. That's why I lashed out at you earlier, and I should've had the decency then to explain this all to you. But no, Carly never does anything logical, right?" Carly smiled.
Even Zander had to smile at that remark. "No one would ever accuse you of being normal," he agreed.
Carly knew she deserved that comment and nodded. "No, they wouldn't."
Zander noted how much calmer she seemed now. "So what happened to bring you over here?" he asked, offering her no explanations.
"Uh-uh," Carly shook her head. "You're not getting off that easily. I think you owe it to me to tell me why you lied to me."
Zander sighed and felt his chest tighten as he realized what that would
mean. He knew it was time to tell Carly the truth about his feelings towards her. He just hoped she wouldn't shove him out of her life; he knew he would never be able to bear that. "You're right," he said. "I owe you the truth, since you braved the storm to come all the way over here to apologize to me."
"I'm glad you see things my way," Carly teased, trying to lighten the mood. Zander looked like he was about to throw up. Carly realized he was nervous, which pleased her. She was glad that she meant that much to him; that he was nervous about her reaction to his words.
Zander gave her a half-smile and allowed it to fade before speaking, "When Sonny first came to me and told he me had a special job for me, I was so happy. I feel sometimes like I owe Sonny so much for all he's done for me. He's given me this great job, helped me out when Sorel was threatening me, gave me a place to live and paid for all my hospital expenses."
Carly nodded; she already knew all of this.
"I didn't mind that the job was to take care of you and Michael. You two are important to Sonny and since Sonny helped me protect Emily when she needed it, I figured I owed him the favor anyway. Sonny made it clear from the beginning that it was best not to tell you the details of why I was suddenly spending time with you. He also told me to ease into it, get to know you slowly and watch you from a distance."
"Kind of like pretending to be my friend?" Carly asked.
"No." He shook his head, "Being your friend was easy. But because Sonny
didn't want you knowing exactly what I was doing, he suggested that my
becoming a more regular part of your life was something that should happen gradually. I found that I loved spending time with you, Carly. I still do love spending time with you and I hope we can continue to be friends. I would really miss that," his face looked sad.
"Sonny told me that there was more," Carly said quietly.
Zander's heart pounded again; he'd thought he'd found away to avoid telling her the rest of it. "He did?"
"Yes. He told me you gave him back the money yesterday and quit."
"He didn't leave anything out, did he?" Zander muttered under his breath.
Carly sidled up to him, stopping just a few inches away from him. "Why did you do that, Zander?"
"I, uh, that is, er..."
Carly looked at him expectantly, not budging an inch.
"Fine," Zander sighed, getting up and walking around the room. Nervously, he ran his fingers through his hair, taking several quick breaths. "I got tired of lying to you, Carly. My feelings for you have grown stronger and stronger as time has gone on, especially after that kiss..." he trailed off, knowing he had basically just given it away. "What I mean is, I do want to be around you still. I want to continue spending all the time I can with you and Michael. But I don't want
to do it as Sonny's employee."
"What do you want to do it as, Zander?" Carly asked softly, standing up and walking towards him slowly.
"Your boyfriend," He answered quietly, his eyes never leaving hers.
Carly walked even closer to him, her lips melting into a slow smile. "Would it surprise you if I told you that I wanted it that way too?"
The look on his face answered her question immediately. "What?"
"Sonny told me how you felt before I came over here," she admitted, stopping in front of him, her eyes still locked with his. "And he got me to admit I felt the same way about you."
Zander felt his head spin and his heart felt like it would pop out of his chest at any moment? "You -- you -- you --"
Carly reached up and gently touched his cheek. "I'm in love with you too."
As Carly's face approached his, Zander's arms went out to encircle her and draw her closer to him. He closed his eyes as their lips met for the sweetest kiss Zander had ever had. Carly broke the kiss first, moving her head back to glance in Zander's eyes again.
Zander searched her face and was happy to realize that her words had been sincere. "Would it be inappropriate of me to scream with happiness right now?" he whispered to her, nuzzling her nose with his.
Carly clasped her arms around Zander's waist and shook her head. "No. Go right ahead."
Zander leaned his head back and let out a whoop of joy, causing Carly to laugh. "Now what?" Zander asked, staring down at her, marveling at how wonderful she felt in his arms.
Carly pulled him down on the bed and cuddled close to him. "We can neck for awhile if you want," she suggested with a grin. "Or," she continued as her stomach growled, "You can feed me. I'm starving - I haven't eaten anything since last night. I was too upset."
Zander stroked Carly's hair lightly, a dumb smile on his face. "Anything you want," he murmured. "In fact, why don't we go downstairs and see what Jake is cooking?"
Carly suddenly sat up and clapped her hand to her forehead. "I was so
nervous about seeing you, I totally didn't register anything!" she
exclaimed. "Jake's is closed due to the storm, I think."
Zander laced her fingers in his and began tugging her up. "Let's go take a peek," he said.
They headed downstairs and Zander let go of Carly's hand to go and
investigate in the kitchen. Carly glanced out the window and gasped in
surprise. There was tons of snow on the ground; it covered her car up to the door handles and it was still falling hard. "Look's like I'm stuck here until someone clears out this now," she commented as Zander returned from the kitchen.
"I don't have any complaints about that," Zander said, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind her.
Carly rested her head against his shoulder. "Neither do I," she said softly.
Zander rested his chin on top of her head and inhaled her sweet scent. "I was so scared to tell you how I felt," he confessed suddenly.
Carly turned in his arms, her hunger forgotten as her thought turned to
something else. "I know you were; I was scared too. Not to tell you, but to even admit it to myself." As Carly glanced into his eyes, she giggled, "I feel like such a novice at this."
"At dating?"
"If that's what you call it. But I want to take this slowly, Zander," she warned. "No sudden marriage proposals anything."
"I'm not sure if what I really want from you right now fits into that
category," Zander responded with a grin as his hands trailed down her body, pulling her closer to him.
Carly closed her eyes as Zander bent his head to kiss her, gently at first, and then more passionately as their feelings began to overtake them. Carly moved her fingers lazily up Zander's chest and then she
locked her arms around his neck. Her right hand twined in his hair as her lips pressed firmly against his.
Before things could go any further, Zander broke away. "I have an idea. I'll be right back," he said softly, letting go of her and walking over to the jukebox against the right wall. He inserted a quarter and selected a song to play. Moments later the first strains of a slow song began to play. Zander grinned at Carly and walked back over to her, "May I have this dance?"
Carly slid her fingers into his outstretched hand with a smile of her own. "I'd be honored."
Zander led her onto the dance floor and snaked his arms around her waist, pulling her body close to his. Carly rested her head on his shoulder and slid her own arms around Zander's neck. "This feels so nice," she murmured as her body began to sway with the music.
Zander inhaled the sweet scent of her, tightening his grasp around her
waist. "I feel like I've dreamed of this forever, Carly," he whispered in her ear. "You smell so sweet, so nice. Holding you against me, it feels so right."
Carly closed her eyes, her mind going hazy as her thoughts drifted away from everything but her and Zander and what they were doing at that exact moment. Her fingers began roaming across Zander's neck, down his back and slid under his shirt, where they began tracing hearts against his skin.
Zander closed his eyes and shivered lightly as he felt Carly's caresses. His own fingers unlocked themselves and his right hand slid around her bottom, crushing her against him. He rested his head atop of hers, murmuring her name over and over.
Carly rolled her head slowly under his, eliciting moans of pleasure from Zander. She smiled deviously as her fingers moved from his back to the front of his chest, lightly rubbing against his firm nipples before moving lower and twining themselves in the hair in the center. She felt her emotions flow through her veins, spreading out through every inch of her body in ways she hadn't felt since that night so long ago when she first came to Port Charles.
Zander felt Carly's growing desire and knew his own emotions matched hers. He opened his eyes and moved them around the room, searching for the perfect spot .. His eyes settled on the nearby pool table and he smiled as he began to gently propel her towards it.
As they moved, Carly clung tightly to Zander, raising her face to meet his. The music floated through her, bringing her passion to a surface in a way she'd never felt before, not even with Jason.
Zander gave Carly a feathery kiss at first, pressing more firmly when she clasped her hands around his neck and pressed her body up against his. He cinched his hands on either side of her waist and lifted her up, sitting her on the edge of the pool table. His fingers deftly unbuttoned her shirt, sliding it down from her shoulders and away from her body. He removed his mouth from hers and admired the luscious curves in her upper body. He lowered his lips to taste her skin, starting at her shoulders and moving slowly over to her neck and across her chest to the other shoulder.
Carly moaned as shivers of desire flowed through her body. Her fingers
snaked into Zander's hair and pressed his head against her skin, wanting to feel him against every part of her. She felt her hands move down to the edge of his shirt and she lifted it over his head. She stared in awe at his toned chest, the muscles that twitched when the sudden cool air hit. Carly slid her arms across his back, her fingernails lightly tracing designs into his back.
Zander moved his head back up to Carly's face, his tongue running across her chin, cheeks and forehead before settling once more on her lips. He traced them with his tongue and then pressed his lips against hers again, sliding his tongue inside her mouth and exploring all the crevices it found in there. His fingers stumbled clumsily against her back as he fought to unhook her bra. Finally succeeding, he quickly slid the straps down her arms and carefully removed the bra from her body before tossing it to the floor. His hands closed around each breast as their mouths continued to press against each other. Their breaths became shallow and Zander moved Carly back further onto the table and climbed atop of her. He broke the kiss and moved his mouth to her breasts, seizing her left nipple between his teeth and nibbling
gently. His tongue licked against the nipple, causing it to harden and then he suckled on it gently, fondling the other breast with his hand at the same time.
Carly moaned louder, muttering Zander's name as she writhed against him. Her hands slid down to his jeans and she fumbled with the button as she tried hard to concentrate on what she was doing as well as what Zander was doing to her body. She felt like she was on fire as she the button finally opened and she removed tugged on the legs of the jeans in order to remove them from Zander's body.
Zander moved his lips further down Carly's body to her abdomen, using his hands to help her remove the rest of his clothing. He then slid her pants and panties off her body, gasping with delight at the silky skin he found underneath her clothes. Not able to stop himself now, Zander ran his fingers up her legs to the soft folds of skin where her legs met. He slid his finger into her slowly, feeling how wet she was. He couldn't think, all he could do was feel.
Carly reached up and pulled Zander's face to hers again as she arched her body against him. His skin pressed against hers as he pressed his fingers into her again and again. He then slid them into his mouth, tasting her sweetness. "Taste how sweet you feel," he whispered, gently pressing his fingers into her mouth.
Carly suckled on his fingers seductively, her eyes never leaving his as she did so. Zander smiled and removed his hands, placing them on either side of her. "I want you so much, Carly. More than I've ever wanted anyone before," he said softly.
Carly tenderly brought his lips down to hers. "Then make me yours, Zander. Show me how much you want me."
That was all the invitation Zander needed. He plunged into Carly, entering her with a ferociousness he didn't think he was capable of. He gasped as her warmth engulfed him. Carly stiffened and held him there, not wanting to rush this. Zander glanced down at her questioningly.
"Slowly, Zander," Carly whispered. "Savor every second, every feeling of this moment." After several seconds, Carly relaxed her legs and wrapped them around his waist, giving him full access to her.
Zander began to move slowly within her, using one hand to palpatate her
breast. He kissed her passionately, seizing her mouth in a way that let her know who was in control now. Carly wrapped her arms around his chest and moved with him, keeping her paces with him.
Zander sped up, bringing his hardness right out of her before thrusting it back in again, causing Carly to gasp with pleasure. She thrust against him as hard as she could, closing her eyes and moaning loudly. "Zander! Oh, god!" Zander smiled and continued to thrust, calming them down slightly as their orgasms began to get closer and closer with every movement. Carly's nails dug into his back as she held herself as close to Zander as she could. Her body shook with every thrust, her chest rising and falling as her breaths shortened.
Zander curved his arms around Carly's back and began thrusting even harder and faster, hoping his heart could keep up with how fast he was moving. The walls were moving in his hazy glance and his ears were plugged as he felt himself about to explode.
Carly's body suddenly began to convulse and shake as she screamed and cried out Zander's name when she finally climaxed. Seemingly half a second after her, Zander felt his juices explode into Carly as his orgasm rocked him to the very core. He called out her name and thrust a few final times before collapsing beside her, breathing heavily.
Neither one of them was able to speak for several minutes as both tried to catch their breaths. Their bodies were damp with sweat and Zander was still inside of Carly, his arm curved around her back holding her close to him. Finally, Carly lifted her head slightly and peeked at Zander, "All I have to say to that is WOW."
Zander's lips curved into a grin and he pulled her closer to him, though he kept his eyes closed. "I don't even have words to describe that, Carly. I never would've dreamed that it could be that good," he whispered.
"I'm glad, Zander." Carly settled her head on his chest with a contented sigh. "It just keeps getting better from this point onward."
"I can't wait, Carly," Zander replied, wrapping his other arm around her and kissing the top of her head. "You know, most people hate snow and blizzards, but I'm finding that I really like them."
"Why?"
"Because for the rest of my life, I will know that it was a blizzard that first brought us together. It's a blizzard of love," he chuckled.
Carly laughed too, "That's right. A Blizzard of Love."
