A/N: Hey! This is actually longer than some of the other chapters so yay me! Well, I just had a lot to write. It's over two Word pages longer than most others so celebrate me! Or just read it, either one. It took forever for chapter four, but with this chapter I hurried because I'm getting into this story again.

This should explain just about everything, but there's still more to why Ron went all psycho and evil. For those of you who resent him being so cruel, isn't it obvious that the real Ron is still inside there, desperately waiting for a reason to be nice again? Something like that…

Review, please. Now. I mean it. Thanks!!! :o)

Disclaimer: Dani's mine, Pociones class is sorta mine, and the plot and half-poem are so definitely mine that it hurts! Other than that, it's JK Rowling's, but that will change in time… muchachacha… muchachacha…!



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An hour later found Harry venturing into the Hogwarts library at the end of the 4th corridor. He had taken a walk on the outskirts of the Forbidden Forest for a little while, stopped by the Pociones room and then hung by Hagrid's vacated hut, and felt slightly better about himself.

It was true--even with the new year, a new teacher, and reassurance, Harry was plagued by guilt. ^What if Hermione hadn't come that night in the Astronomy Tower? Was I really about to jump?^ Contemplating suicide left Harry with shivers so, once more, he shrugged it off to the back of his mind. But it would resurface later; it always did, anyhow.

He was relieved and disappointed at the same time when his eyes saw Hermione nestled in a chair at one of the oak tables in the library. It looked like she was writing, but Harry knew Hermione would never write in a library book. Curiosity tugged him over, and he slid in a chair across from Hermione.

"Harry!" she exclaimed, surprised, and snapped the book shut so quickly that it made a loud thud that attracted momentary attention from the rest of the students.

A quick glance at the book caused Harry to smile in his usually lopsided manner. "Eres escribiendo en tu diario," he grinned, pleased when her eyes were confused. "Finale idioma!" he declared, flicking his wand. "That's better. I used a language spell so it translated whatever I said into Spanish. Dani helped me with it while I was out."

"Amazing!" Hermione agreed a bit too passionately; Harry couldn't tell if she was truly impressed or if she just wanted to change the subject away from her notebook.

Harry wouldn't let her divert him, though. "I see you're enjoying the journal I bought you. Can I see what you're writing?"

Hermione's cheeked tinged pink. "It's just a poem." She hugged the notebook safely to her chest.

"I'm sure it's great," Harry pleaded, putting his puppy dog eyes on. "Pleeeeeeeease? Pleeeeease, Mione?"

"Oh, fine," she grumbled, but Harry had the feeling that she had wanted him to read it. She slid the lavender notebook across the table and Harry snatched it up briskly before she could change her mind.

"It's not finished yet," Hermione warned, nervousness rising in her already high voice. Harry didn't pay attention and commenced reading it.



You are the candle

And I, the flame

As I burn for you

Burn with you

In our fiery game

The slightest breeze threatens us

You the candle, I the flame

And it's more than you can handle

Handle in our fiery game



Harry set the notebook down after seeing that there was no more to be read and stared across the table with a poker face to Hermione. She looked ready to explode. "Well???" she asked, taking the notebook back.

"Um, Herm, I don't know how to break it to you but..." Her face fell, and Harry grinned. "...I love it."

"Harry, you prat!" Hermione scolded, but she was beaming and blushing in contradiction to her statement. "I'm stuck, though. I know there's more to the poem, but..."

"May I ask what the poem is about?" Harry mused, random ideas popping in and out of his head. Hermione omitted a firm shake of the head and frowned as if he had just invaded her privacy.

"Quit flickering, Herm," Harry teased, getting up. "Happy or sad, good times or bad, you know I'm the best friend you've ever had. The mood swings are killing me."

"You can speak to snakes, defeat Voldemort, and now spot rhyme? Gee, I'm impressed!" Hermione stuck her tongue out immaturely; Harry flashed her a dry smile and left her there, alone.

"Flicker..." she said aloud, enlightened, and began scribbling in her diary once more. How could she tell Harry that the poem was about him? He obviously didn't understand, or maybe he did. Maybe he was just trying to make her suffer. It was just like him to do that!

Hermione felt anger and her face flush, and so she calmed herself. She had no proof, and was getting angry with Harry for something that he didn't do. "He's right; I am crazy," she laughed.

"Shh!" hissed the librarian.



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"Harry! ¿Cómo el encanto está trabajando?"

Harry turned a few moments after leaving the library to face Dani, who was jogging up to him. "Sorry, Profesor--I mean, Dani. I took the spell off, and have no clue what you just said."

"Quite alright," Dani nodded. "Listen, Harry--we don't have a guidance counselor at Hogwarts so I'm being a multi-purpose substitute for the time being. I heard about what happened..." Harry sighed, trying to suppress how annoying this was getting. "I know, I know, everyone's saying that. But you seem a bit detached and I was hoping I could be if some help."

"Uh, thanks," Harry mumbled somewhat rudely. "I'll stop by if I need to."

"I mean it, Harry," Dani called as Harry hurried off onto the outside grounds.

"Aaah, fresh air," Harry proclaimed, breathing deeply. Night was settling in and the sky was inundated with stars. Hogwarts always seemed to be picture-perfect at night, like the darkness of the sky and the majesty of the stars could sweep all of the problems away. And for Harry, it did quite a good job of it.

He found himself lying down on the grass, smiling blissfully. The hum of the crickets was a sweet melody and the soft sound of the wind eased his soul. It felt surreal, and yet Harry believed it to be real.

"Harry? Is that you?" Harry propped himself up on his elbows and saw a beautiful silhouette approaching. He felt numb, and if possible, even more serene.

The figure approached and knelt beside him, and Harry's breath caught in his throat. "Mione?" he asked incredulously, and she simply nodded. "Another night, another outdoor rendezvous?" he teased, swatting at his bangs that had once again fallen on his eyes.

"So it seems," Hermione whispered, and her voice sounded hoarse. "I'm not even going to begin to ask why you're here again."

"It's beautiful," Harry explained breathlessly, beckoning to the sky. "Hermione, look at the stars."

She looked up skeptically, but the stars were not what captivated her. Harry's youthful, innocent eyes were bulging with excitement simply at the sighting of every day stars. He met her gaze, and she blushed. Was she staring? Should she stop? Was he staring too? Her thoughts were a mile a minute.

"Harry, I..." Hermione found herself at a loss for words.

"Jesus, Herm. Why is everything getting so confusing?" Harry sighed, crouching on the lawn. His eyes focused out into the distant darkness.

Hermione scowled, hurt. What was that all about? "I didn't mean to confuse you, Harry, but apparently you're confused quite easily."

"I'm sorry, Hermione, but not all of us have writer's block as our biggest problem!" Harry spat dryly, aiming to hurt.

Well, his aim was right on target. "How dare you even go there! You know how personal my writing is! The world doesn't revolve around you, Harry!"

"I never said it did, but since you know everything I guess you just assumed it!" The words flew from Harry's mouth without him even thinking. The regret slowly sank in as he watched Hermione's eyes water with hurt and humiliation. "Herm, listen... Oof!" She lunged forward and pushed him with all of her 115 pounds; he stumbled back and landed hard on the ground. "Hermione!" he called, knowing that it was ineffective, as she ran away like the wind, her head in her hands as her sobbing echoed throughout the night.

Harry pulled himself up and dusted off. "Oh, crap."



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Harry hesitated, and then knocked three times on the sturdy door. "Come in, Severus," called the voice from inside. Harry timidly swung the door open and peered inside.

"Uh, sorry, sir. Are you waiting for--?"

"Come in, come in," Dani ushered, setting a few papers down and swiveling the chair to face Harry. Harry slowly stepped inside and sat in his usual seat although the classroom was empty. "I was expecting Professor Snape. It's awfully late, what brings you to my room?"

"Sorry, I could come back tomorrow," Harry said quickly, but Dani shook his head and prompted him on. "You just said... uh, if I needed to talk..."

"Right, that's what I thought," Dani nodded, sitting on a desk two rows directly in front of Harry. "I was hoping you'd take me up on that. I've heard various things, why don't you start from the beginning."

Harry cleared his throat, hoping he could do this. It had been a long time since he had said anything about it. "Um, well... I returned from my 6th year to the Dursleys, my mother's sister's family. And, er, when I got there, um, y'see, well..." Harry felt uneasy. "Uh... well, when I got there, they were dead. All of them. Just like how the Riddles died--do you know about that?" Dani gave an acknowledging nod; he was always nodding, rather than speaking.

"I hated the Dursleys, but I never wanted them to die exactly," Harry divulged. "It was Voldemort's work; he had left behind a healf-dead servant that had tried to stop him. The servant, Peter Pettigrew, had been in my debt because I once saved his life, and Peter was trying to return the favor. Um, Peter told me that Voldemort was going to the hurt my friends, and mentioned the names Weasly and Granger.

"So I got on my broom without thinking and flew right there, in plain sight, to Hermione's home in Canterbury. When I got there, she was unloading from school and everything was fine." Harry choked on his words and fought back tears. "And I immediately flew to Ron's home. It only took about ten minutes, but... but..." Harry's efforts failed and his eyes watered. He swiped at them, humiliated. He was seventeen, and had vowed not to cry! Why did he have to go and cry?

"But... I was too late. Voldemort had killed Ron, my friend's, parents, and fled. If I had only gone to Ron's house first... I could have saved his parents. I got there as Voldemort was leaving. He used the crucatius curse on me, and… I fled… I apparated out as the Avada Kedavra beam was radiated." Harry took a guilty gulp and kept his eyes glued to the floor. "…and Ron never recovered." Harry took a shaky breath and snuck a furtive glance at Dani. His eyes were closed and his lips were pursed tightly together.

"Harry," Dani said slowly after about two minutes of silence. "Harry, you're seventeen. It's not your job to save the world, and somewhere along the line you were convinced that it was. You have to realize that it's not your fault. You tried, and that's what counts. This isn't your fault. It's not."

"Yes it is!" Harry erupted, standing up. Tears were streaming down his cheeks but he didn't notice nor car. "It IS my fault. Why does everyone keep saying it's not?"

"Because it's not!" Dani yelled back, standing as well. "Everybody says it because it isn't, but until you realize it for yourself this guilt won't go away. Do you really want to live like this?"

"Dani," Harry said calmly, trying to keep his composure. "This is just too much. My former best friend hates me, my crush--er, other friend--will probably never speak to me again after I just blew up at her for no reason, Hagrid was fired simply because he refused to be the Weaslys' secret keeper a year ago--he didn't deem himself responsible enough--and the Dark Lord's back. It's hard to think that it's not my fault."

"Harry, I--"

"Am I interrupting something?" Dani and Harry turned around; Snape stood in the frame of the door, face forming a sneer.

"Not now, Severus," Dani frowned, irritated.

"No, it's alright. I'm going anyway," Harry said, getting himself together and heading towards the door. "Thank you for--"

"Harry," Dani protested.

"It's quite fine, I'm done," Harry insisted, and brushed past Snape and into the hallway. The door closed behind Snape, and Harry sank to the floor and began once again crying freely.



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A/N: Yayyyyyy! Thanks for your oh-so-kind reviews! There were only 8 but I am still very grateful!Love u all!



Melly08—hey I love that word, awesome! I sound 80's don't I? well, I am an 80s child and a product of them so it fits.

Spazzy—You don't gotta know it, if it has anything directly to do w/ the plot I'll explain. Thanks for your review and, er, enthusiasm.

Bookworm4ever—yes, you are very into h/hr I see.

Emili Potter—What test? Send a link! Well, Ron isn't all bad. Read my A/N.

Hazeleyez—I always mention reviewers! I actually used the world revolving thing, what a co-ink-a-dink! Thanku!

Meg—yes, yes they r. that was implied by the first chapter. Thanks 4 reviewing and enjoying!

Black Eyeliner—STUPIDHEAD! UPDATE SHADES OF LAVENDER, YOU'RE KILLING ME! With that said… Hehe, whenever my spanish teacher gets mad she starts ranting in spanish and I can understand some of it but man is she fast! Thanks, BUT UPDATE SHADES OF LAVENDER OR THERE WILL BE A REVERSAL IN THIS COMING AFTER PEOPLE WITH OBJECTS!

NikkiWeasley—Is that how it's spelled? If so, I have terrible typos but o well. No, he aint evil, read my A/N at the top. Thanks so much!



*sigh*, thanks! I wish I had more but I am updating kinda fast. I will put a new chapter up once I have 50 reviews since I'm going for ten per chapter? Can u people do that? O please!



Another day, another chapter…



And I'm out…