Chapter Eighteen - One More Night

It was the last night, and they had been married approximately 23 hours and 19 minutes. It was like they had gone to heaven but were still alive. They spent the night before sleeping on the beach. There was a small celebration in the house, but by midnight they were all getting tired, so went to bed. Carter wanted to spend the night completely alone with Abby so he suggested they slept on the beach after they went for a walk.

"So did you expect this before you left?!"

"Maybe. I knew I would marry you sooner rather than later, it seemed kinda...inevitable. If that's the right word to use."

"Really? Well if I'd have known that I would have booked tickets for everyone to come!"

"I'm kinda pleased nobody was here actually."

"Yeah?" Carter asked curiously.

"I think I would have been too nervous."

"What for?"

"Cos it's a nervous thing! Getting married..on a beach..in front of your friends and family. I mean can you imagine my Mom. God what a nightmare."

"I don't think she'd be that bad."

"Yeah sure she wouldn't! She wouldn't come anyway, she doesn't fly remember?"

"Oh I'm sure she'd make an exception."

"Maybe. I wouldn't be so sure."

They had made their way to the other side of the island, away from the likes of the Puerto Rican (now established banjo playing) waiter, Derek the complaining island sitter and the Welsh priest who was hardly understandable, and found a little spot just above the sea, but close enough to feel the dampness slightly of the sea sliding up and down the shore. They sat down on a dry patch of sand and kicked off their sandals watching the sea silently move closer then away from them again.

"What do you think they'll say when we go back and tell them?"

"They'll probably talk about it for like a day then find something else to gossip about."

"Yeah."

She sat thinking thoughtfully about her question, when it dawned on her that they were married. Actually married. Not just, engaged and thinking about getting married, they were actually 'married'. It scared her a little, but then she remembered who she was married too, and her worried just drifted away.

"What are you thinking?" Carter asked, as if he could read her mind.

"Nothing."

"Come on, I know you're thinking about something."

"Well I wouldn't be human if I wasn't!"

"Come on tell me!"

"It's nothing really."

"Okay."

"So what time is the flight tomorrow?"

"2.30."

"In the morning?!" She answered horrifed.

"No the afternoon!"

"Thank God for that."

"Yeah you can have your midday lie in again!"

"Hey! I'll have you know that the only reason I sleep in is because you keep me up late!"

"Don't blame this on me!"

"Why not?!"

"It's your fault as much as mine!"

"It's so not. It's all your fault."

"Yeah sure, shift the blame to me again!"

They both laughed and he pulled her into a hug as they breathed silently against each other, in perfect bliss in each others company.

"I was thinking.." Said Abby slowly. "The new house, us...getting married, I didn't know this would ever happen to me again, I didn't want it to."

"I didn't either. You're lucky I came along and felt sorry for you, otherwise you'd be left on the shelf!"

"Hey! I'm trying to be serious here!"

"Okay sorry."

"Don't you feel like there's something still missing?"

"Like what?"

"I know I made a mistake. And I regretted it as soon as I did it. And now..now I want it back."

"You do?"

"Yeah. I know I don't deserve anything more, I don't even deserve you, or anything that's going good in my life right now..." Carter interrupted her.

"Abby don't say that. You deserve everything you have and more, you made a mistake, everybody does, you're human. At least I think you are. But you gotta remember that if you didn't, then I'd probably be more worried. Nobody's perfect, not even me."

Abby leaned to the side a little and looked at him. He looked back at her curiously, she just stared at him, wondering why he was so good to her, why he chose to marry her, why he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.

"How can you say that after all I've done?"

He looked confused, as if she was completely off the mark.

"All that you've done IS the reason I can say that. Everything you do, everything you say, just everything, it all makes me believe that you deserve everything you have and more. Don't you get that?"

She looked confused now, she would probably never fully understand why he felt she deserved the world, but she liked it just the way it was. He loved her, she loved him, that was it. There were no questions, just a comfortable silence, the odd comment, that was their night, and she enjoyed all of it.

"Thanks John." She finally said as she leaned over and kissed him lightly on the lips before leaning back onto her elbows and stared out into the night.

He smiled back and leant back onto his elbows as they both stared out into the sea. A few moments later Abby started thinking about the baby again, she knew it had been a mistake the second she had the termination, and it seemed that the only way to get it back would be to have a baby. Maybe not right now, but she knew she wanted a baby with Carter. Probably not this year, but soon. Soon.

That night flew by quicker than they'd both have liked. They lay in each others arms for hours, silently breathing, content with each others company. Abby rested her head on his chest as it slowly moved up and down in time with his breathing.

"I like this." Said Carter suddenly.

"What?"

"Us. Just lying together. Nobody around us, we might as well be alone on this island."

"Yeah, me too."

"I love you."

He leaned his head round a bit to try and look at her face which was facing away from his on his chest. She realised he was trying to get her attention and sat up a little to look at him. She smiled at him in recognition, she knew he did, but it didn't hurt to hear it every now and then.

"I love you more!"

"No I love YOU more!"

"I don't think so!"

"Oh I think so!"

"Maybe we love each other the same."

"Maybe. I might just love you a little bit more though."

They both laughed and he rolled over on top of her and kissed her harshly as she continued to laugh. It was already 1am but they didn't care. They made love for the rest of the night and fell asleep by 4. It was the most magical night they had ever had together, and knew there would be so many more to look forward to. The honeymoon was still to come yet..

1pm - Still on the beach

They had slept together, in both senses throughout the night, and it had been magical. But now it was back to reality. Carter woke first and just lay silently watching Abby sleep wrapped around his body. She stirred soon after and woke to see him watching her.

"Good morning." She said smiling, still looking sleepy.

"Afternoon." He replied smiling back.

"Is it?"

"It's just after 1."

"God we're leaving soon." She said as she got herself together and went to get up off him.

"No it's okay Derek said he'd take our things to the plane. I packed it all yesterday while you were changing for the wedding."

"You did?"

"Yep. You can just wear what you're wearing home. Everything else is packed. We don't have to be back till the plane is ready to leave."

"Great. So we've got over an hour of time to kill!"

"We do indeed."

"What do you suggest we do?!" She said with a twinkle in her eye.

"Actually, I wanted to show you something before we left. If that's okay."

"Depends what it is!"

"I think you'll like it."

"I'm intrigued. What is it?"

"Ahh wait and see oh curious one."

"Hmmm I'm not sure I'm liking this!"

"You will. Trust me."

"Why is it I always do?!"

"Cos I'm always right." He answered simply as he stood up and held his hand out to help her up.

"Yeah we'll see about that." She replied sarcastically getting up and dusting off the excess sand from her clothes and then taking his hand as he led her further up the beach.

He led her through the palm trees along a path which seemed like it had been made by people walking on it. He would stop and count something in his head then turn suddenly and count his steps in another direction. She became even more intrigued as he led her further and further away from where they had slept. Eventually he stopped and smiled.

"We're here."

"Where?"

"My den."

"Your den?"

"Yeah. Bobby and I used to play here. Pirates. He was always the baddie."

She stepped out from behind him, and there in front of her stood a huge mass of palm trees in the middle of a closed off area, together in a small clump of about 3 or 4 different sized trees. Ropes were tied from each tree around the area and a tyre hung from the largest tree on the right side. In the middle where the clump of trees were was a small den made of bamboo wood and thin ropes. It was like an adventure playground.

"You made this?!"

"Yeah. It took us ages. We cam here once for the whole summer and we started it at the beginning and only had a couple of days left to play in it cos it took so long!"

"Wow. Impressive."

"Yeah, we liked it."

She continued to explore the surroundings, ducking in and out of the little cave they had created, walking through the trees and tapping the ropes she went past. She came back to him but continued to stare at the creation. It was pretty impressive she thought, she were probably really young at the time, she knew she could never have made something like this.

"You miss him don't you." She said bluntly all of a sudden.

"Who?" He asked, knowing who she was talking about.

She sighed slightly, as if to tell him not to play games.

"I guess. You get used to it."

"It's okay to miss him John."

"I know." He said in a higher voice, as if he felt uncomfortable talking about it, he didn't want to make her miserable about something that happened so long ago.

"Don't shut me out John. I know what it's like to lose someone you care about."

"Yeah?"

"Of course. My best friend died when I was 14."

"You never told me."

"That's cos it happened a long time ago."

"So did Bobby."

"Yeah but you still know people who knew him, you still have to talk and think about him all the time."

"Why don't you talk about her to me?"

"It's not that interesting is it."

"Maybe not. But I'd still like to know. I wanna know everything about your past Abby. Bad and good."

"You're missing the point John. This isn't about me. It's about you. And your brother who died when you were young of something that you couldn't fix."

"I didn't think I could anyway."

"You didn't." She said matter of fatly, knowing he felt responsible partly.

He looked down, it bothered him that she could read him like a book. It was obvious to her that he blamed himself, but he didn't want to explain really. Not even to her.

"Why is it such a big deal?" He said loudly.

"Because it is!" She replied calmly.

"Well I don't think it is!"

"You're wrong John."

"And I suppose you're right?"

"This time yeah."

He looked up. She had a look on her face which told him to be scared, she wouldn't judge him, he knew that. But he hadn't ever really talked about Bobby's death, especially not to Abby.

"It's okay to be afraid John." She continued.

"No..it's not." He said quietly.

She could see he was trying desperately to hold back the tears. It wasn't the right time for him to get upset. Not here, he didn't intend to bring up the past. He just wanted to show her his childhood. He should have known she would try and make him open up about Bobby. Now it was too late, he couldn't pretend not to be upset, she knew he was, she knew him too well. She moved her hand up to his face and cupped his cheek, pulling his face up slightly to look at her.

"Yeah. It is." She said reassuringly.

She stared into his eyes, she could feel his pain now, he could feel her strength, her strength which told him it was okay to cry. And then, a tear slowly ran down his face and he sunk his head into her shoulder. She sighed, relieved he had let go. She rubbed the back of his neck soothingly, whispering words of comfort into his ear. She told him they were going to be okay, he was going to be okay. He felt helpless, like it should be him comforting her, but this time, it was the other way round. She didn't mind, she was happy he let her comfort him, this time it was her turn to be the strong one.

Half an hour later they found themselves still in the same place, sitting lying against the large tree in the centre of the play area. Abby leant against the tree while Carter lay with his head on her lap, breathing slowly, and recalling stories from his childhood with Bobby and the infamous tree house. Happy times, sad times, all the times there was a story to be told, he told it. There were so many that they didn't realise how long they'd been sitting there until Abby saw Carter's watch as he slid it down his arm after it had moved up. It was 2.15. They had 15 minutes then they were leaving paradise and returning to the frozen depths of Chicago. Abby sat up slowly to see Carter lying with his eyes closed.

"John are you sleeping?!" Abby said laughing slightly.

"No! I was just resting my eyes." He replied, a little hurt.

"Sure you were. We gotta go."

"Where?" He said rubbing his eyes.

"The plane. It's leaving in 15 minutes."

"Oh dammit." He said as he got up.

"What?"

"I got something in my foot."

"Oh don't be such a baby. Lemme see."

"No I'll do it." He said stepping back.

"Come on! Let me see it!"

"It's just a thorn or something."

"Well then it's no big deal!"

She moved closer to him as he tripped up on the stick which was poking out the ground, landing on his bum very hard. Abby tried to stifle her laughter and tried to help him up.

"Are you okay?!" She said laughing a little.

"Yeah just peachy thanks."

"Come on John don't be grouchy." She said, giving him her puppy dog look, she knew he wouldn't stay mad at her long.

"Don't do that! It always works!"

"I know that's why I do it."

"You're evil you know that!"

"It's a natural gift." She smirked as she held out her hand to help him up.

He sighed and took her hand as she pulled him up.

"Oww!" He exclaimed as he got up.

"What now?!"

"My back." He said quietly as he rubbed it and arched his back slightly.

"Oh. You okay?"

"Yeah should be fine."

"Come on pansy we gotta go."

"Pansy?!"

"Forget it." She smiled as they walked off towards the beach together, arm in arm.