Always, Makoto

Nephrite,

I have shied from writing this letter too many times. The realization that

you would perhaps laugh and toss it aside brought too much pain to my heart. I

force myself to be bold as I swirl ink upon this page. I have buried this sorrow

for too long; I need you to know my thoughts, my emotions; even if you merely cast

this aside, I need to know, at least, that for one last time I tried to reach you.

No reason exists that states I should still grieve for you. You are my

enemy, my foe. You fought my comrades and I to the death with undying hate. You

swore your allegiance to the one who could destroy all that we fight for. In

reality I should curse you; I should hate you in return. With all my power and

fury I should avenge the loss of my heart. But I cannot bring myself to that

conclusion no matter how firey the anger burns within me or how cold the tears

stain my face. For even after the passing of millennia I have not forgotten the

whispered words, the glances, the velvet embraces. I have not forgotten the way

you used to be.

I still think with longing of our days during the height of the Moon

Kingdom. Still I can remember the nervous joy on your face when first we conversed.

You brought so much happiness to my world, so much light. You were everything that

a perfect suitor should be; everything that I could have endeavored to hope for.

Then I thought our blossoming love could last an eternity. Our scarlet passions

lay like fog wherever we went. I can still smell the shy lilies; I can still taste

the rose wine. I became drunk, hopelessly at a loss of senses, on our love. I could

have layed in your arms until the silver stars fell from their heavenly out-posts.

I wanted to be with you always; to be your lover and your soulmate.

But happiness, no matter how well framed by perfection, fades, and

treasured hearts become lost.

You took your leave of me.

I cannot begin to describe my thoughts or actions when I learned of your

betrayal--betrayal, it's such a cruel, unforgiving word. I felt angered, cheated,

as if I had been awoken from a glorious dream too soon. Feeling stupid and enraged

I locked myself inside my heart, encasing my emotions in steel. Those were, and

still are, my blackest hours. The days I learned the dark sides of love.

Armed with my rage I sought revenge. I wanted you to hurt as badly as I

had. I took up a shield of ignorance and a spear of fury and marched tearfully to

our first and final war. But the pain flooded my soul upon seeing you again. I

could not forget the passionate love we shared, no matter how far you had strayed

from me. I matched your powerful blows with a stinging heart. I cried, Nephrite,

when I fought you that last time. I prayed furiously for your surrender, for your

return, a return that would never come. Through the night I fought, until the

cruelty of war consumed me.

That tragic end of my first life left in me a wound that will never heal.

I failed you, Nephrite, for I could not save you.

Even through the years, I have never stopped loving you. You were my one,

my love. There lies in my soul an emptiness in which only you will fit. With that

emptiness filled I will be whole, at rest. Your love completes me.

Love always,

Makoto