In the Valley of the Shadow of Death
A/N: Sorry it took so long to update…
The house was silent.
It was not the kind of silence Ruthie had wished for her entire life, but it was an eerie, distressing kind of stillness that made the loudest noise of all.
It felt like her family was a stack of cards and the slightest breeze would make the entire house fall. Perhaps it had always been this way; the queen stacked on the king, joker, ace; and now they were all struggling to stay on top. And they would. All except Simon, move further, higher in the pile. This was a kind of realization that Ruthie couldn't except. She had always been smart, wise beyond her years, but she couldn't' understand why all this was happening. The big brother, who she had neglected and been neglected by, was going to go away forever, like her Grandma had.
"Hey," she spoke watching Simon and Matt step in from the back door, her thoughts interrupted. "How was the movie?"
"Great," Simon responded, not admitting that in light of the recent events in his life the make believe world of movies seemed rather trivial. "You would of liked it Ruthie."
"Really? Maybe I'll go see it then." she replied using meaningless small talk as Simon kissed her on her forehead and spoke, "Well, I'm going up to bed. See you guys tomorrow."
Ruthie looked on after him. Recalling that Simon, having never been overly emotional, had never done that before. "Well, things change." she said to herself, reminiscing that she had learned that much last year.
"I'm going to go find Sarah." Matt said touching her lightly on her shoulder as he walked away, both noting that it was only six pm.
Ruthie, always the observer, stumbled on to Kevin and Lucy talking in the den.
"I just wish this would all be over son we could get on with our lives." Kevin spoke bitterly as Lucy turned to him sharply.
"You didn't just say that. My bro-"
"Yes, yes. Your beloved brother is dying, and I'm sorry. Really I am but that doesn't mean our lives have to stop."
She threw her hands in the air and laughed angrily. "Yes it does!" she paused. "I want to spend as much time with him as possible. And if that means our relationship is put on hold then--"
"I don't know if I can accept that," Kevin said aggressively as he grabbed her shoulder. "Luce, don't be stupid. Waiting around till your brother croaks is not an ideal idea to me. And it shouldn't be for you either. Besides you don't need them, you have me. I love you."
Lucy smiled and gave in. "I love you too. Fine, we'll continue with the wedding plans. I'm sure Simon and everyone will understand." They embraced and Ruthie turned from them. She couldn't believe this. Lucy had always been relationship driven--letting each boyfriend mold her into who she was, instead of doing it herself-- but she could never believe that Lucy would even stoop to this level. Ruthie sighed to herself and headed upstairs.
She awoke and stumbled into Simon's room. She didn't know why but something just mad her migrate there. He was sleeping as she walked in and Ruthie began to think of the fun she and he used to spend together. It saddened her to think that if he hadn't of gotten sick she would still be strangers; never talking, much less being in the same room together. She stepped out of her thoughts and proceeded to shake him awake. It didn't work at first, nor the second time and her heart jumped into her chest . Not yet. He couldn't be gone, there was still time she repeated over and over to herself.
"Ruthie, what's wrong? What are you doing?" Simon spat startled.
"N-Nothing." she spoke quickly as relief flooded back into her system. "I just came in to say hi, and to wake you for breakfast."
Simon looked puzzled and then a look of understanding came over him.
"Hi," he smiled and kissed her on the forehead again. "You know Ruthie, I'm fine. Today anyway."
She shrugged her shoulders and spoke softly, "I know." She hated it when he did that. Kiss her on the forehead. It was so unlike him and she desperately wanted after all despite all her 'wisdom' was still a child and wanted everything back the way it was.
"Since we both know that, let's go downstairs and see what mom made for breakfast."
* * *
After breakfast Ruthie stumbled around the house aimlessly. She knew she was suppose to go to school but somehow she didn't feel like going and pretending that everything was alright. It wasn't like anyone would notice. No one noticed much of anything now and no one noticed anything before except Lucy and Kevin's relationship. No one had bothered to notice that Simon had been ill.
* * *
A/N: Sorry it took so long to update…
The house was silent.
It was not the kind of silence Ruthie had wished for her entire life, but it was an eerie, distressing kind of stillness that made the loudest noise of all.
It felt like her family was a stack of cards and the slightest breeze would make the entire house fall. Perhaps it had always been this way; the queen stacked on the king, joker, ace; and now they were all struggling to stay on top. And they would. All except Simon, move further, higher in the pile. This was a kind of realization that Ruthie couldn't except. She had always been smart, wise beyond her years, but she couldn't' understand why all this was happening. The big brother, who she had neglected and been neglected by, was going to go away forever, like her Grandma had.
"Hey," she spoke watching Simon and Matt step in from the back door, her thoughts interrupted. "How was the movie?"
"Great," Simon responded, not admitting that in light of the recent events in his life the make believe world of movies seemed rather trivial. "You would of liked it Ruthie."
"Really? Maybe I'll go see it then." she replied using meaningless small talk as Simon kissed her on her forehead and spoke, "Well, I'm going up to bed. See you guys tomorrow."
Ruthie looked on after him. Recalling that Simon, having never been overly emotional, had never done that before. "Well, things change." she said to herself, reminiscing that she had learned that much last year.
"I'm going to go find Sarah." Matt said touching her lightly on her shoulder as he walked away, both noting that it was only six pm.
Ruthie, always the observer, stumbled on to Kevin and Lucy talking in the den.
"I just wish this would all be over son we could get on with our lives." Kevin spoke bitterly as Lucy turned to him sharply.
"You didn't just say that. My bro-"
"Yes, yes. Your beloved brother is dying, and I'm sorry. Really I am but that doesn't mean our lives have to stop."
She threw her hands in the air and laughed angrily. "Yes it does!" she paused. "I want to spend as much time with him as possible. And if that means our relationship is put on hold then--"
"I don't know if I can accept that," Kevin said aggressively as he grabbed her shoulder. "Luce, don't be stupid. Waiting around till your brother croaks is not an ideal idea to me. And it shouldn't be for you either. Besides you don't need them, you have me. I love you."
Lucy smiled and gave in. "I love you too. Fine, we'll continue with the wedding plans. I'm sure Simon and everyone will understand." They embraced and Ruthie turned from them. She couldn't believe this. Lucy had always been relationship driven--letting each boyfriend mold her into who she was, instead of doing it herself-- but she could never believe that Lucy would even stoop to this level. Ruthie sighed to herself and headed upstairs.
She awoke and stumbled into Simon's room. She didn't know why but something just mad her migrate there. He was sleeping as she walked in and Ruthie began to think of the fun she and he used to spend together. It saddened her to think that if he hadn't of gotten sick she would still be strangers; never talking, much less being in the same room together. She stepped out of her thoughts and proceeded to shake him awake. It didn't work at first, nor the second time and her heart jumped into her chest . Not yet. He couldn't be gone, there was still time she repeated over and over to herself.
"Ruthie, what's wrong? What are you doing?" Simon spat startled.
"N-Nothing." she spoke quickly as relief flooded back into her system. "I just came in to say hi, and to wake you for breakfast."
Simon looked puzzled and then a look of understanding came over him.
"Hi," he smiled and kissed her on the forehead again. "You know Ruthie, I'm fine. Today anyway."
She shrugged her shoulders and spoke softly, "I know." She hated it when he did that. Kiss her on the forehead. It was so unlike him and she desperately wanted after all despite all her 'wisdom' was still a child and wanted everything back the way it was.
"Since we both know that, let's go downstairs and see what mom made for breakfast."
* * *
After breakfast Ruthie stumbled around the house aimlessly. She knew she was suppose to go to school but somehow she didn't feel like going and pretending that everything was alright. It wasn't like anyone would notice. No one noticed much of anything now and no one noticed anything before except Lucy and Kevin's relationship. No one had bothered to notice that Simon had been ill.
* * *
