Foreword: I do not own or claim to own Anne rice or any of her masterpieces nor do I claim to own Austin Powers or any of 'his' movies (there are only mild references). I would like to apologize for the time jumps in this episode as well.
Halfway through the night Raven awoke, he ran into the girls' bedroom, frightening both of them and waking up the rest of the house. Raven appeared to have lost his mind.
"They're coming and no-one will be spared. You must believe me! Can't you see them? The window, look to the window quickly!"
Triple H and Austin beat up Raven almost beyond recognition. The Rock put him in a straight jacket and Taker deposited him in the attic.
**The next morning**
Kurt, Molly and everyone in room 'better' were training in the shed. Matt and Lita were making out on the sofa downstairs and room 'alpha' along with Jeff was discussing Raven's odd behavior… in the girl's bedroom.
"Dudes, this is not cool. Raven is our friend. We can't just abandon him like this in his most un-awesome time of need." Edge was having trouble keeping a straight face. Maven was reading a thick book on the solar system. Randy was playing with small explosives called 'bungers' (not sure if you have bungers in USA or wherever, but they are pretty much just gunpowder) and Jeff was painting his fingernails black, again. Randy set off a chain of bungers and started to panic when he couldn't extinguish them. Jeff snatched up the bungers and threw them into the attic.
"Problem solved!" Jeff returned to his nails.
Maven looked up, "what about our friend in the attic. You know the one in his un-awesome time of need?"
BANG!
Edge and Randy winced, "BRUTAL!"
Jeff hopped up. "I'm going to check on him." He walked up the stairs to the attic, "Raven? Dude?" Jeff came flying out of the attic, Raven still in the straight jacket, had sorta jumped at him and hoped for the best. Jeff landed hard on the back of his head. Raven ran into 'alpha', picked his small bag up in his mouth and ran into the girls' room. Matt and Lita ran upstairs after hearing the thump of Jeff and Raven's combined weight hitting the floor at 18 metres per second. By the time Matt burst into the room Raven had set up four books (including Maven's book of the solar system), maps of the universe, maps of Australia and a blank pad of paper. The maps were strewn with protractors, rulers and compasses. It all looked very important. Raven spun wide-eyed at Matt and Lita, he looked like a hunted animal.
"What's going on in here?" asked Lita cautiously.
Raven ignored her and went back to explaining, "at precisely midnight tonight Mercury and Venus will be clearly visible on the eastern horizon. The garden prevents us from seeing but on the western horizon the other planets will also be aligning. At two past midnight all the planets in our solar system will align with this house, more specifically this very room and another dimension may open up. Demons will take more alluring forms and possess this house. If it truly is haunted we will know tonight!" halfway through his speech someone who shall remain nameless (Jeff Hardy) had undone the straight jacket and Raven was now frantically scribbling on the maps.
"What the hell is going on in here?" Stone Cold Steve Austin ran in and bashed everything that moved. He was promptly followed by Rock, Taker and Triple H. Taker held Raven up by the neck.
"Who the hell let you out!" Taker shouted at him, put him back in the straight jacket and the attic and issued new orders to everyone. "Anyone who takes him out of the straight jacket or the attic before tomorrow will die slowly and painfully by my hand."
Triple H advised everyone to stay out of the house and ignore Raven's cries of, "They are coming for us. Hardyz, Edge. Beware these demons have eyes for you."
The wwf superstars stayed outside, they could here Raven trying to break loose.
**10 o'clock that night**
Lita and Molly were nervous. Raven could clearly be heard above them. Telling them to 'seek a bed away from this accursèd place.' They sat shivering despite the warmness of the night. The girls had listened to Raven's ravin' for the better part of two hours. Suddenly he stopped. It was deathly quiet in the house. Lita got up to close the window, she stood mesmerized by the two brightest stars in the sky. They were almost perfectly in line with the house. Heavy footsteps caused her to turn swiftly.
"You guys okay?"
"Oh Rock you scared me." Lita shut the window and walked slowly back to her bed beside Molly who had forgotten her troubles and was asleep.
"Taker sent me in to make sure you guys were cool with Raven being a freak."
Lita nodded, "good night Rocky." The Rock smiled and closed the door quietly. Taker was outside waiting for him, "I shut up Raven. Are the girls okay?"
"Yeah. They're fine!" Rock walked in first, Taker looked up at the attic door as a final check and had just laid his head down when he heard another noise. He massaged his temples and got up. The Undertaker walked into 'alpha'.
"GET OUT! GET BACK TO YOUR OWN ROOM AND STAY THERE!"
There was a unanimous 'yes sir!' Molly and Lita went to their room and the hardyz and Kurt went to their room. Raven was roughly seized and thrown back into the attic. The Undertaker tied Ravens ankles together and hung him upside down off a peg.
"You can't do this to me! The blood will rush to my head and kill me!"
"Yep, and if it doesn't I will."
"Yes, sir."
Taker slammed the attic door and laid his head gently down on the pillow.
*****BOOM! ***** Lita and Molly screamed.
Taker sat up, "Goddamn it to hell. RAVEN IF THAT WAS YOU, YOU SON OF A BITCH I'LL…"
"It wasn't me." Raven whimpered he sounded scared.
"It's not worth it, you can beat that sorry son of a bitch tomorrow!" said Austin. Taker shrugged and went to sleep.
(Note from Madame: at this point an electromagnetic field descends over the house, the cell phone and cameras stop receiving and recording respectively. The time is 00:02 am.)
At about 4 o'clock that morning, Matt crept noiselessly into the girl's room. He had an itch only Lita could scratch ;) . he gently climbed into the bed closest to the window from the foot board and crawled up to the pillow. He put him arm around the sleeping red-head in front of him. You can probably imagine his shock when he was embraced from behind. Matt slowly rolled over to be greeted by another red-head, he smiled and lay on his back with his arm's around both of them. The feeling that something wasn't quite right was rapidily sinking in. "Lita?" he nudged both of them, not sure which one was actually his girlfriend. He was promptly answered from his right.
"Matt hunny… who's Lita?"
Matt leapt out of the bed and looked in wonder at the gorgeous pair, neither of whom were Lita.
Lore stood up and stretched, "ew! I thought you were Jeff!" she looked around, "hey where the hell are we now?"
Vixen stood on the bed and glared at Matt, arms crossed. "who's Lita?"
"who are you?" Matt rebutted. Vixen looked crushed. Lore looked confused. Tye rolled over in Molly's bed. "dude! She's been your girlfriend for the last five years. Man you must have been wasted last night."
Raven woke up in the attic, he looked up and saw the Undertaker hanging upside down in the straight jacket. He suddenly realised that he and Taker weren't the only one's in the attic, he was lying in someone's lap and she was stroking his hair tenderly. He also noticed that his maps/charts were on the floor and that 'whoever she was' had been reading them. The Undertakers face had been badly beaten and Raven couldn't help but laugh loudly.
She spoke, "Greetings my dear little Raven. I thought they'd clipped your wings for good."
Raven sat up and turned to look and the long blonde hair streaked with blue and black. "nah, they just ruffled my feathers."
She stood and helped him to his feet, "tell me about your dimension, the people the biota and the physics."
Raven embraced her,"who need physics when you've got chemistry?"
She smiled revealing her fangs. Lights started flashing and alarms sounding in Raven's head. He suddenly decided this was not such a good idea and backed off.
"re-thinking your options?" she teased and pushed him away, "I have a partner anyway."
Raven smiled, "partner?"
She giggled like a child then stopped abruptly, "boyfriend!"
Raven looked dissappointed. She walked to the trap door and beckoned. Raven followed her like a puppy dog.
"Hi guys and matt." Mongrelle walked in followed by Raven.
Matt let out a loud cowardly scream that brought the rest of the house running. Austin was brandishing a cooler (that he had grabbed by mistake in the dark), the Rock a hairbrush (belonging to Triple H), Triple H a pencil case (belonging to the Rock) and Edge a dressing gown (what the?). Jeff, Maven and Randy staggered in indifferently. Kurt was hiding in the closet in 'bummer' and he had little or no intention of coming out. A loud deep voice commanded him to go to the attic and he obeyed.
Everyone in the girl's room heard it too.
Vixen looked up, "did that sound like the Undertaker to you?"
Raven looked at Mongrelle, "did it?"
Mongrelle turned away, "I didn't hear anything."
"then you must need your hearing examined cos I damn sure heard something." Taker strode in.
Vixen stepped forward, "dad?"
"wait," Raven stepped between the amazons and the advancing wwf superstars, "I need to explain a lot of things and I don't know how long we have." He swept his arm towards the amazons, "these girls are from the dimension quite like our own but several things, small things are uniquely altered, some for the better and some for the worse."
Taker charged at Mongrelle, Mongrelle charged at Taker. Neither backed down and there was a sickening crack. Runing at full pelt until colliding had floored the pair of them.
Raven looked at Kurt who had just walked in from the attic, "you aided his escape! Are you still sane? What happened?"
Kurt put his hands up, "hey! I was coming out of the closet and I heard a voice that I thought was God and …"
Rock stopped him, "it doesnt matter if God was speaking to you came out of the what?"
Kurt looked at him, "the closet."
Rock looked at everyone else, "no further questions, your honour."
Triple H gave the room a once over and announced his feelings about the whole -switching dimensions and taking over the house- thing that the four women had going on, the only way he knew how. "so… who's hungry?"
**after breakfast**
after a delicious meal (cooked by the amazons) and the constant separating of the Undertaker and Mongrelle, Raven proceeded to explain using a timeline that he had altered to accommodate both dimensions.
"it appears that in 2000 instead of hiring Lita Vince hired the amazons. Vixen, Tygra and Mongrelle. Lore came along a little later and instead of hiring Essa Rios Vince employed Damien. Who is a cousin of yours Matt, Jeff."
Jeff leant over the dining table for another pancake, "but we don't have a cousin called Damien. do we Matt?" Matt shook his head and Jeff smirked.
"no not anymore." Matt said. This got everyone's attention.
Matt put one arm around Jeff's sholders, "dude…bro. When mom was pregnant with you, there was a terrible plane crash and her sister was killed. She was pregnant at the time too, it was a boy. I'm sorry Jeffy."
Tye doubled over laughing.
"it's not funny!" Matt and Jeff roared at her.
Tye pushed Matt back to his seat, "yes it is. Mongrelle keeps complaining that Damien has this weird fear of planes and that they have to bike everywhere."
Vix, Lore and Mongrelle laughed.
"dude that's sick!" Edge laughed. Now everyone was laughing that is except Raven.
Raven cleared his throat loudly, "as I was saying… that's why these ladies don't know Lita," he gestured to the amazons and then to the guys, "and why these gentleman don't know Damien."
Triple H had been checking out the girls in his crusty, arrogant way. And now he leaned in on the conversation. "so who were… sorry are you with in your dimension, if anyone?"
Taker butted in as well,"and who were you calling dad?" he directed this at Vixen.
Vixen stood, "I'm currently seeing Matt. And I was talking to you. You're my father!"
Rock patted a speechless Undertaker on the back, "well done!"
"shut up!" Taker was majorly uncomfortable with everyone around the table oogling his daughter even if she was his daughter in another dimension,'God' he thought, 'if any one of them touches her in any way I'll…'
Matt was watching Vixen intently and it wasn't just her eyes he was watching either. 'Well technically it's not cheating right?'
Lore stood up, "I'm currently dating Jeff and my parents are Kane and Chyna."
Austin raised his hand, "which one's the woman?" Lore gave him the finger and he returned it.
Tye rose to her feet, "my dad is Shawn Micheals and my mum is also Chyna. And I'm currently sleeping with Edge, Rob Van Dam, the Hurricane, Shannon Moore, Evan Karig…"
Lore slapped her arm. "No you're not."
Tye nodded, "no but I'd like to be, simultaneously if possible." She looked at the shocked faces. "just Edge and RVD."
Mongrelle refused to stand, "my parents are Gangrel and Luna and I currently own Damien."
Triple H contradicted her, "you mean are owned by Damien right?"
She stared him down, "no!"
Austin got up and kicked Raven out of the way, Mongrelle's eyes went red.
"Men own women, that's the way it has been and always will be and if you got a problem with that you can bite my Texas ass!" he mooned her.
Mongrelle turned away, Raven stood, "put that thing away that's no way to talk to a lady." Austin had out argued Mongrelle but she had a comeback that always knocked 'em dead. She walked up behind Austin when Raven challenged him. Raven was close enough to see her fangs enlarge and bury themselves in Austin's neck. Raven shrieked and bolted. Mongrelle dropped Austin (now scared into submission) and started after him. "Raven! Wait…" she stopped. Only Damien understood her violent, aggressive nature and Raven was not Damien.
'However' she thought evilly, 'if the need should arise I'm sure he would be a fine substitute.'
Edge leapt to his feet, "I knew it, I knew it! I knew you reminded me of someone. You're related to Gangrel!" he announced pointing at Vix who grabbed his hand and pointed it at Mongrelle.
"Oh!"
Lore laughed loudly, "oh the Hurri-senses are tingling today?"
Edge looked hurt, "oh come on. I'm not as bad as the Hurricane."
Lore folded her arms, "that was pretty bad dude. I stand by my 'oh the Hurri-senses are tingling' and that's it!"
Tye fastened herself to Edge, she stated to pull him towards the stairs, "I'll make those senses tingle and others besides!"
Edge's jaw hit the ground, but he picked it up to an evil grin and sped after Tye locking the door of 'alpha' behind him. During that scene Vix had been watching Matt, it was amazing to think that as well as she knew him, in this dimension he knew nothing of her. She looked him up and down. 'Well he looks the same but it wouldn't really be cheating if I checked his…performance records. Would it?'
Lore and Randy wandered outside talking about tattoos, Jeff watched them. He could feel the jealousy rising inside. Rock waved a hand in front of his face,
"Dude, he's hitting on your woman!"
Jeff snapped out of it and raced outside.
"I hope she can swim." Triple h yelled after him.
Wheels began to turn in Jeff's mind, 'what's that supposed to mean?'
Lore and Randy turned, Jeff picked up speed, straight into the pool.
As he sank to the bottom he smacked himself in the head, 'smooth move Jeff!'
Lore reached under the water and pulled Jeff out with one arm. Jeff lay in the sun drying while lore and Randy sat under a tree nearby. Randy was talking about his tribal tattoos, Jeff about his tiger tattoo. Lore took off her jumper and pulled up the leg of her jeans revealing some of her tattoos.
Randy was barely paying attention to anyone's voice but his own when something struck him.
"Hey Lore, do you have a tattoo on your butt that says 'made in Chyna'?"
Lore looked to him like he was lower than shit. "Get out of my sight!"
"Yes ma'am."
Jeff rolled onto his stomach to look at Lore he could now see her tattoo's properly. He gasped, "the detail is amazing, and the colors, wow! The greens and blues of the dragon the reds and yellows of the flames." He touched the flames on her arms gently as if they would burn him.
"Have you got any others?"
Lore smiled, "hell yeah!"
Jeff sat up and scooted closer, "cool. Where'd you get them done?"
"Just south of Manchester."
Jeff laughed, "no I meant where on your body?"
Lore smirked at him, "so did I."
The younger Hardy's eyes grew wider as did his smile. "Can I touch it?"
"WHAT!?"
"The tattoo…can I touch it?"
*Sigh of relief on the part of both*
Lore stood and brushed the leaves that hung from her pants, she looked in the window of the shed. She took Jeff's hands and pulled him inside, "sure why not?"
Vix was watching Mongrelle single handedly kill all the big guys in a game of gridiron. Matt was watching Vixen.
"Wow, Mongrelle's putting a hurtin' on them huh, Matt?"
Matt was caught in her eyes. "Yeah, she's beautiful!"
Vixen balled her fists and looked at him, "oh no!" she laughed.
"What?" Matt was still in a dream world.
Vix recognized the look in his eyes and realized they were the same deep brown -head over heels- puppy dog eyes she had fallen for."Matt what color is Mongrelle's hair?"
Matt kept his eyes trained on Vixen, "it's the most beautiful shade of red I've ever seen. If we were to get together tonight it wouldn't be cheating right?"
Now Vix was returning his lovesick gaze. "Why wait 'til tonight?"
Matt smiled, he picked her up and took her to his room.
Mongrelle was soon tackled onto her back by Triple H and the Undertaker, she looked at the sky, then at the roof. Raven was watching her, she had to talk to him and explain that her fangs were for feeding purposes only and that when she had attacked Austin she had been starving as well as angry.
Suddenly she found herself outside the bedrooms upstairs. She could hear Tye and Edge in one bedroom and Matt and Vix in another. 'Something's never change but it does explain why Raven is on the roof rather than in the attic'
She climbed up and was almost at the window when a black book with golden pages caught her eye. She picked it up 'Rookies 1999'. It seemed to be a book of all the people interviewed by the wwf for the 2000 pick of rookies. All of the kids in the pictures were gothic, Raven must have been looking for someone to travel with. She turned another page and gasped. The page was covered in little black hearts and roses. The biography was neat and had been filled out with considerable care. The photo was folded over to cut out the other two girls. Raven had copied out a small passage from Anne Rice's 'Interview with a Vampire' next to the photo. It read;
"Her lips were red, Her looks were free,
Her hair was yellow as gold
Her skin was white as leprosy
The nightmare life-in-death was she,
Who thicks man's blood with cold."
The page was headed: Mongrelle.
Elle's black heart beat faster, she ascended the roof. Raven scuffled nervously when she sat next to him.
"Do they bother you?"
Raven gazed up in horror with the most beautiful eyes Mongrelle had ever seen.
"No of course not, what would bother me about your f...teeth? Is there anything wrong with those weird fangs...um teeth?" he said it so quickly that she knew he was not himself.
"Silence!" she said quietly. Raven was silent. She smiled and started twisting a lock of his hair, "there's nothing to fear. I don't bite… hard."
A gold mini with black stripes drove past the house fast, a voice called out, "Mike Myers. Austin powers: international man of mystery. 1999"
Raven stood and sat again, "was that Golddust?"
Mongrelle craned her neck to see, "I think so."
Raven shuffled closer, "Freak!"
Elle shuffled away, "who are we to judge?"
Raven moved further away, "speak for yourself Bitch!"
"Freak!"
"Vampiric Whore!"
"Gothic loner!"
Their terrible words hurt each other more than real pain ever could. Raven swung, Mongrelle sidestepped it, and Raven fell. He tumbled down the tiles and went soaring off the roof. Mongrelle's arm reached for his wrist, she grabbed his hand and pulled him up. She hadn't accounted for the fact that Raven was a little heavier than Damien and when he started to slip Mongrelle wrenched him over the guttering and onto the roof beside her. Raven hadn't let go and he rolled directly over the window that had let them both out. Raven managed to twist as he fell and when Mongrelle landed flat on her back Raven landed on top of her. Neither of them gave any thought to what happened next, it just sort of came naturally.
Mongrelle was explaining herself later when the other amazon inquired after her whereabouts earlier in the day.
"I swear to God it just happened."
Tye interrupted her (Vix and lore were disgusted beyond all belief). "Was he better than Damien?"
Elle closed her eyes to avoid meeting theirs. "Maybe?" they looked at her, the answer according to the pinkness of her face was clearly yes.
Mongrelle looked away to avoid seeing their amused looks, "it's a shame we have to leave tonight. I could've gotten used to that."
"WHAT?" the men had been listening in from the kitchen. Mongrelle tried to forget that every guy in the house (especially Raven) had heard her say that Raven was a better lay than her boyfriend of five years, Damien.
Raven walked in and put his arm around her waist. "Yeah the dimension portal is only active for twenty four hours before our reality transposes." He explained. Everyone looked around the room at their new friends. Mongrelle broke away from Raven and looked again at his chart on the wall (from earlier) and picked up a pen. "At midnight tonight we'll have to go back unless…" Mongrelle was scheming.
TO BE CONTINUED…
