Possession

Dom had enjoyed kissing Kel until she pushed him away and looked up at him as if he had betrayed her. He didn't like the look and lowered his head, not particularly wanting to see what he saw. "Sorry," he mumbled.

Kel just looked away and discreetly wiped her mouth off. "Don't let it happen again," she told him gruffly. "Please."

Dom nodded. He looked up at her again and could not help thinking about kissing her again. He mentally went over the possible consequences if he once more did what she had told him not to do and decided the worst she could let herself do to him was either break a bone or kick him between the legs. Neither prospect seemed particularly appealing, but he just couldn't help risking it.

As Dom trapped her in between his arms against the wall, she decided she should just give in and kiss him back. Neal loved Yuki, not her; the kiss had been a fluke. Dom was nice enough, he appreciated her, and apparently felt something deeper than friendship for her. He had also come after her to help her when she went after Blayce during the Scanran War.

So did Neal, a voice in the back of her mind reminded her.

She squashed that voice and told herself that Dom was better for her. He didn't have a fiancee, and he looked enough like Neal that she could trick her feelings into developing for Dom again. She just didn't feel the same fire from his lips as from Neal's though, and she stood in the hallway with him, kissing him for much longer than she had kissed Neal.

Dom finally released her, his breath warm on her face, his cheeks flushed and eyes bright. "Don't let it happen again, hm?" he repeated, resting his forehead on hers. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that..."

I think I'm going to be sick, Kel thought dazedly. She felt like she had just kissed her brother, or her father. It made her queasy. "Yeah..." she muttered, voice unreadable.

"Well," Dom said. "I need to go change my clothes. I'll meet you...at the palace mess hall for supper?"

"How romantic," Kel replied wryly. "I'll meet you at the mess for supper though."

She would learn to love Dom. She would make herself learn to love Dom, because she couldn't feel that way towards Neal. This mess seemed so reversed: she should have felt like she had kissed her brother when she kissed Neal, not Dom. But she hadn't. As she watched Dom leave the hallway, she felt her stomach roll.

"This sucks."


Neal stared blankly at the ceiling above his bed. He would be out of the infirmary in a day or two. Between his healing powers, his father's healing powers, and the potion he had taken that morning, his arm had mended at abnormal speeds. Duke Baird gave him funny looks for most of the day.

Neal didn't care. He just wanted to be left alone. Dimly, he remembered that he hadn't eaten midday, and also that he still hadn't written Yuki a letter explaining his situation. Which had just grown worse. Should he just marry Yuki and forget about Kel, no matter how much that hurt? Or should he tell Yuki to get lost and mope through the rest of his life alone? He didn't know for certain, but he felt pretty strongly that the kind of love he felt was the forever kind. It left his heart feeling as bleak as the desert Dom had just come back from.

The image of her kissing Dom so fervently seemed burned into his mind. He couldn't dismiss it; he wouldn't stop thinking about it. His mind wanted to show his heart what happened when he let himself think he loved Kel and not Yuki. And it hurt.

Neal stared blankly at the wall.

You knew this would happen, his mind told him. Do you see why I told you to listen to me?

You shut up, his heart snapped. She loves you. You know she does. You know she felt that...that...spark when you kissed her earlier! Don't give up...

"I hate this," Neal said flatly, his voice monotone.

"Hate what?" Cleon asked nasally from the doorway.

"You," Neal answered.

"I'm flattered you would think about me in bed," Cleon told him. "But I know that you truly don't. So, come, come. What bothers you, friend?"

"Go away. Take your 'friend' business to someone you truly mean it for," Neal informed Cleon. He felt he would probably remain in the position he had flopped onto the bed in forever and not care.

Cleon had never seen Neal so low. Not even when Kel hadn't shown up for the wedding. That all seemed so long ago. "Neal. We had a fight, sure, but that doesn't mean I want to stop our friendship."

"I do. What part of punching you in the nose did you not understand?" Neal retorted lifelessly.

"Neal--"

"Go away."

"Would you talk to me? You and I have had a good friendship for a long time. I would really hate for it to end over something as silly as a fist-fight," Cleon pleaded.

"Leave. Me. Alone. I punched you in the nose for a reason. I broke your wrist and thumb for a reason. Gee, can you guess what that reason was?" Neal asked, bitterly sarcastic.

Cleon sighed. "Fine. I can help you get her, though."

"Get who."

"Kel."

"Go away."

Cleon turned to leave but paused when Neal spoke again.

"She wants my cousin anyway. And I have Yuki."

Cleon shrugged. "As you wish, Sir Healer."

Neal heard Cleon retreat to his bed and groaned. He hated feeling so helpless, especially to his cousin. To the one who teasingly called him "Sir Meathead" all the time. He had lost Kel to his cousin. Someone much older than her. Dom had practically taken her from the cradle!

"Cradle-robber," he growled. "I can't stay in here and mope forever. Yuki should come back soon, I have to have a good arm so I can hug her and welcome her home and..." he trailed off, pouring his magic into his arm. He could feel it mending. It had almost completely mended anyway by the time he set to work on it, so Neal removed the bandage from it and began to move it stiffly. He hadn't lost use of it for long, but his muscles felt sore from its lack of use for a day or so.

Neal rose from the bed and went to find his father, who had gone into the next room and spoke with a healer in there. Duke Baird looked up briefly at his son, who waved to him with his previously broken arm, and rolled his eyes. He waved Neal off, knowing that his son had cheated to get his arm healed. Had Neal followed his orders and not gotten into his potions, Neal would still lie in bed moaning about his arm.

So Neal walked out of the infirmary, rubbing his stiff arm. Staying in the same position for a day or so would make anyone's arm stiff, and Neal did his best to swing it and flex it as much as he could as he walked down the hallway with a determined gait, suddenly having a confidence he didn't have in his weakened state. He didn't know what he had confidence for, just that all of a sudden he had it.

"Neal!"

Neal froze at the familiar voice. He turned and saw the familiar face of his fiancee. His heart didn't surge like it normally did, and he cursed his heart in three different languages for it. "Yuki!"

Yuki ran to him and hugged him tightly. "When did you get back?"

"Day before yesterday," Neal answered with false cheeriness, hugging her back. "Or something like that. Sorry, I haven't had a moment to write to you."

"Oh, I don't care. I wouldn't have gotten the letter anyway," Yuki dismissed it. "Oh, Neal. I've missed you so much."

Neal felt his stomach plunge to his feet and settle there, heavily weighed down by the pit inside of it. "Right," he agreed. He kissed her soundly on the mouth, hoping to inspire at least some of the magic he had felt with her before he had rushed off like a fool to rescue She Who Shall Not Be Named. He felt...nothing, though. Nothing at all. "You must be starving?"

Yuki shook her head. "No, not really. I ate on the ship."

"Oh." Neal took her hand in his and walked down the hallway with her. "You must want to get some rest though?"

Yuki giggled. "Neal, Neal, Neal. Still as much of a mother hen as always."

Neal laughed nervously. "Right, right. I really should stop doing that. Can't help worrying about people I care about though."

Kel popped into his head. He pushed the image of her and Dom kissing out of his mind and turned back to Yuki. "Did your father recover?"

"Yes." Yuki nodded, smiling. "He made quite a miraculous recovery, so my lady asked me to return to Corus."

"Of course," Neal replied. He neglected to mention Kel because of the feelings she stirred in him, but Yuki apparently had other plans. How did she not notice the way his palms seemed to sweat so much? How did she not notice the way he scanned the area around them every twenty seconds for signs of Kel and Dom?

"Where's Kel?" Yuki asked innocently.

"Don't know," he told her gruffly. "Somewhere around the palace, I'd guess. Not like I watch her every second of every day."

Oh, smooth. Way to go, Mr. Suave. That's not suspicious at all.

Yuki looked at him as if he had gone mad, then laughed uneasily. "Well, I do feel a little hungry."

Neal looked out the window in the hallway and inspected the fading sunlight. "Well, the supper bell should ring shortly."

Just as the words left Neal's mouth, the bell tolled, sounding the call for supper. He took Yuki's hand again and led her to mess hall, knowing she wanted to see Kel, and would let her see her best friend. He couldn't help the dread from freezing the blood in his veins though as they approached the mess hall and saw Kel and Dom, Kel on his arm.

"Kel!" Yuki called, waving. She had moved her arm to latch around Neal's. "Kel, over here!"

"Yuki!" Kel cried. She saw Neal, faltered, but recovered quickly and led Dom over. "Yuki, hello! When did you get back?"

"Just this afternoon, a little while ago," Yuki answered. She looked at Dom and smiled knowingly at Kel. "And who is this handsome man?"

"My cousin, Domitan of Masbolle," Neal told her stiffly. Dom looked at Neal and saw something terrible in the knight's eyes that almost frightened him. He knew...he had seen Dom kissing Kel...and he looked about ready to rip Dom's mouth from his head and feed it to the dogs.

Kel nodded, carefully not looking at Neal. She felt guilty, and she could see the hostility with which he looked at Dom. She didn't want to see that gaze turned on her. "He's a sergeant in the King's Own. We met when Raoul chose me as his squire."

"I see," Yuki nodded. "Where will we eat tonight, Neal?"

"Wherever you want to eat," Neal told her offhandedly.

"Oh! Let's all eat together!" Yuki enthused, looking at Kel eagerly. "Shall we? I think it'll be great fun. It will give me a chance to catch up with what has happened since I left, too!"

Kel looked uneasily up at Dom, who just shrugged and smiled; then she looked to Neal, who had looked over at the wall in an attempt to seem aloof. She smiled and nodded. "Let's."


They had all decided to get food from the mess hall and take it to Yuki's quarters off of Shinkokami's. The seating arrangement had gone like this: at the square table, Neal sat on the bottom right, next to Yuki who sat on the bottom left. Dom sat across from Yuki at the upper left, and Kel sat across from Neal at the upper right. It made Neal uneasy to sit so close to Kel, and apparently made her uneasy too; Yuki and Dom carried out most of the conversation, trading stories of desert for stories of the Islands.

Finally, Yuki couldn't stand her fiancee's and her best friend's silence any longer. "What has gotten into you two? You've barely looked at each other all evening, and you've hardly spoken two words!"

Dom added his two cents, "Kel, are you angry at Neal for getting into a fight with that Cleon boy?"

Kel looked up at Dom. "I was. I'm not anymore."

Yuki looked at Neal. "Why did I not know of this?"

"You see, that letter that never got written..." Neal tried to explain.

"Cleon broke his arm," Dom interrupted.

"Shut up, Dom, I don't need you to tell *my* fiancee what happened to me while I can tell her myself," Neal snapped.

"Neal, don't talk to him that way," Kel reprimanded.

Neal shot her a dirty look and turned back to Yuki. "Cleon insinuated that I had slept with Kel while you had gone to the Islands to take care of your father, so in order to defend our honor..."

"Oh you just wanted a fight, Meathead," Dom teased.

"Leave him alone," Yuki commanded.

"Yuki, Dom only teased him," Kel argued quietly.

"Dom doesn't need to tease him," Yuki replied calmly.

"Yuki, I can speak for myself," he said softly to her.

"I can't defend you as your fiancee?" Yuki asked. "I thought I had certain rights to do so."

"It's just--" Neal wanted to say.

"His ego got bruised," Kel explained offhandedly.

"It did not!" Neal argued.

"Did so," she answered.

"Maybe you had better leave it be," Dom advised Kel.

"Well I had to tell Yuki what happened! He acts so stubborn--" suddenly she stopped and blushed lightly. She had reminded herself of that morning, and now Neal looked slightly taken aback. "He would have never told her had I not."

"Kel, I swear to Mithros--" Neal started.

"Oh, go throw yourself into Lake Naxen," she told him rudely.

Neal's eyes flashed angrily, the most emotion he had shown all night. He hadn't realized it until then that he had raised out of his seat quite a bit, so he settled back down and rigidly ate his food. The meal continued in awkward, tension-filled silence. Neal spelled obscene words at Kel with his food, who spelled equally as obscene words at him with her food. After a few minutes of doing this, they both suddenly burst out laughing.

This startled Dom so much he nearly fell out of his chair, and it startled Yuki so much that she dropped her fork onto her plate with a loud clang. Neal had spelled the word "harlot" on his plate facing her, and she had spelled the word "bastard" facing him. Dom and Yuki saw this, looked at each other as if Kel and Neal had gone mad, and wondered why they had done such a thing.

By then, Neal and Kel had stopped laughing as loudly and as much, but they both still brimmed with short laughs. "We're idiots," Neal announced to Kel.

"I agree," she replied, a laugh bubbling out of her mouth.

Fortunately, both Dom and Yuki missed the way that Kel and Neal looked at each other. They also missed the small glances they snuck at each other for the rest of the meal. When Dom and Kel both had finished eating, they bade Neal and Yuki farewell and left the Yamani lady's quarters.

"Why did you and Kel suddenly start laughing?" Yuki wanted to know.

"Because we had acted stupidly," Neal answered evasively. "She and I have had a lot of trouble in our friendship lately, but I think we fixed it tonight."

"I see," Yuki said. She disappeared for a moment into her closet and emerged in a silk sleeping kimono. Neal had taken a seat on a comfortable chair in her bedroom, so Yuki sat herself down on his lap. Automatically, his arm encircled her waist and she snuggled closer. "Have I told you that I missed you terribly?"

"I think so," Neal replied. Yuki tilted her head back and down, kissing him.

"I don't think I can wait until our wedding night for this," she murmured.

Neal still felt nothing when he kissed Yuki now. No spark, no surge of his heart, nothing like the liquid fire the simple brushing of his and Kel's lips had produced. Maybe if he slept with Yuki...?

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Let's do it."

Somehow their clothes wound up on the floor. Neal didn't pay much attention to how it happened after he carried her onto the bed. He also didn't realize that during his ministrations, he had addressed Yuki as "Kel".

Yuki, however, did notice.

"What?" Yuki asked, sitting up and pushing him off of her.

"Huh?" Neal responded, clueless.

"What did you just call me?" Yuki demanded.

"I called you--Yuki," he frowned. "Why would you think I called you anything else?"

"Because you called me 'Kel,'" Yuki glared. "You called me my best friend's name! Neal, how could you?!"

"I didn't--" Neal floundered. He didn't remember calling Yuki by Kel's name! She definitely must have heard wrong...

However, Yuki had already collected his clothes and shoved them at him. "Go."

Flabbergasted, Neal stared at Yuki. "What?" he asked stupidly. "Why--?"

"You called me 'Kel!'" she yelled at him. "Get your clothes on and leave, Neal!"

Still unsure of the entire situation, Neal pulled his clothes on and left Yuki's rooms. He really should have told her about Kel, he mused as he walked down the hallway. He felt somewhat light, but he also felt incredible guilt at calling his fiancee by the name of the woman he truly loved.

Truly loved.

Well, Neal thought as he entered his quarters. I truly do love Kel. There. I thought it. I love Kel. That doesn't seem so bad. But...poor Yuki. What do I do about her? I think I need to tell her the truth...I'll let her cool off for a few days though, and then I'll tell her.

Neal was in a better mood than he had been in days.


Neal felt something heavy land on his back. "Whoa! What the hell?!"

"Neal, that's not a very nice way to greet me," Kel whispered in his ear.

Neal couldn't help but grin. "I suppose you speak the truth." She slid off his back and he whirled, capturing her in his arms and kissing her deeply. "Hello, gorgeous."

Kel giggled. "That makes up for it."

"I hoped so," he grinned and kissed her again, feeling her hands exploring his back underneath his shirt shortly after. Soon, she had tugged his shirt off of his torso, and Neal had pulled her shirt from her.

Their clothes ended up on the floor shortly before they did. Neal paid no attention to the their surroundings as he nipped at Kel's neck and shoulder. She shivered and moaned, "Gods..."

He laughed, a low, seductive, possessive sound. He kissed her mouth again, trailing kisses down her jaw and neck afterward. He fingered her breastband carefully, caressing the sensitive skin just below it. She reached and clasped the back of his neck, drawing his mouth to hers for another scorching kiss. In moments, Neal had removed the cloth from Kel and set to work on her breasts.

Neal woke up sweating. "Gods," he murmured. "That...was nice..."

And he fell back asleep, trying to have another one of those dreams.


Neal woke up that morning feeling refreshed. He knew he wasn't out of the woods yet, but he felt close enough that he could see the break in the trees. After telling Yuki how he felt--which he hoped to accomplish as soon as possible--he would have time to slowly drive a wedge between Kel and Dom, and eventually have her for his own. Yes, life felt good. The gods had smiled upon him last night, and they kept on smiling on him this morning.

"Good morning, friends of mine!" he said cheerily, sitting next to Kel and across from Owen. "Where did Seaver go off to?"

"Came down with some weird flu," Owen replied. "Your father has refused to let anyone see him--put him in isolation, he did."

"Strange," Neal murmured. He worried for Seaver, his curiosity piqued because of his instincts to heal. "I think I'll talk Father into letting me see him after lunch. I may identify what he has, having seen more than I should have at New Hope..."

Kel panicked. "No! No, Neal, you shouldn't. Your father wouldn't have put him in isolation if he didn't think what Seaver had was contagious."

"Everything's contagious," Neal told her. "And besides, I hardly ever get sick because my body kills any germs that might hinder my normal body functions."

Kel just shook her head. "I don't think you should go in there."

"I'll be fi--"

"Neal!"

Someone ran into the mess hall. "Roald?" Neal asked, his brow scrunching in confusion.

"Neal, come quick!" Roald ran over, grabbing his friend by the arm roughly.

"What happened?" Neal wanted to know, stumbling to his feet and running along side the prince.

"Your father collapsed!"

Neal skidded to a halt in front of the infirmary and let the words sink in. "Shit!" he cried, running into the infirmary and to the isolation room. His father lie crumpled on the floor in front of the door. "Father!" he yelled, worry making his voice thick. He carefully straightened out his father's elderly body, looking frantically for any signs of life. "Father..." he said, quieter. His hands fumbled for the groove in Duke Baird's neck where the carotid artery pumped. Tears burned the back of Neal's eyes. "No," he murmured. "No! Father...you can't...no..."

But there. His pulse fluttered erratically in the healer's veins, hardly easy for Neal to detect. But it was there. "Merciful Mother," Neal said to himself. "Come on, Father, don't give out on me now," he murmured, pouring his Gift into Duke Baird's old body. "Please. Please, stay with me."

Duke Baird's pulse pumped faster, still growing weaker, trying to resist Neal's magic. "Father, no, you can't go!" Neal struggled to make the old man's pulse resume normal pace. "You can't. It's not your time. Goddess...Father...no. Come on! Come on, dammit!"

Roald stood by helplessly. His mind had gone blank except for one thing: Duke Baird had grown very old. He had served as chief healer when his father had been a page. Maybe the Black God had come to collect him now.

"Father!" Neal cried. He placed a hand over the healer's heart, the beat that should have been steady growing weaker and weaker. Duke Baird's pulse sped up, trying to pump the fresh blood to the vital organs in his body. "No, please! Dammit, stay!"

"Neal!" Roald grabbed Neal's arms and wrestled him away. "Stop it!"

"I have to help him! Let go, Roald!" he struggled, kicking and jabbing and trying to twist.

"He's dying, Neal! If you try to save him, you'll get sucked under too!" Roald reprimanded him.

"Let me go! Roald!" he managed to duck out of the prince's grasp and he rushed to his father, who had begun to stir. Neal checked his pulse again; it had become slightly stronger. "Father?"

Duke Baird made an incoherent noise.

"Father!" Neal cried. He dredged up the last of his reserves and tried to funnel it into Duke Baird. However, he felt the magic begin to get tugged out of him by force, making him weak. He stopped the flow and stared at his father. Roald had told him the truth. "Father..."

Duke Baird looked at Neal. His voice strained, he said, "Neal, I love you. Tell your mother that I love her too. I should go now...I'm tired...just want to close my eyes..."

Neal felt the tears spill onto his cheeks. "I love you too, Father," he whispered and kissed his father on the cheek. "Just sleep, now."

Duke Baird closed his eyes and stopped moving altogether, having held his son's hand in his last vestiges of life. Neal couldn't see through the blur of his tears, but he knew he set his head on the center of the old Duke's chest.

Roald wanted to comfort his friend, but he knew he couldn't achieve it. He did, however, know someone who could.


When Kel entered the infirmary, Neal still had his head resting on his father's chest.

"Neal," she said quietly, kneeling next to him, gentle fingers resting on his back.

He lifted his head from the Duke's chest and looked at Kel. His hand still rested in Duke Baird's as he looked at his best friend and the woman he loved with red-rimmed, bloodshot, swimming green eyes. Kel's breath caught in her throat, and she hugged him tightly.

"Neal," she breathed, stroking his hair and his back, wishing she could stop his pain. He wrapped his free arm around her waist, hugging her back. He didn't dare let go of his father's hand though. She didn't know what to tell him. The only thing she knew what to do for him was to hold him. So she held him, and they sat there on the floor of the infirmary, in the middle of it all for Neal had dragged his father's body away from the quarantined room, and he felt the tears coming on again. "Neal, shhh. It's okay," she murmured to him. "It's okay..."

His shoulders trembles against her, a strangled sob escaping his lips. He tried desperately to keep it in, but his body wouldn't have it. "He...he died right before me, Kel..." he told her. "He died holding my hand...I couldn't save him..."

"It was his time," she answered him, pulling away from him and looking into his deep, sad eyes. With gentle fingers, she wiped away his tears. "You could have done nothing for him, or died trying. I know you tried to save him, Neal. You...you could have died. The Black God would have taken you too. I don't think I could stand it without you." She smoothed down his hair and glanced at his hand, still in Duke Baird's. "I don't think he died in pain, Neal. Look at the smile on his face, and the way he grabbed your hand before he died. He and the Lioness healed people at the war with Tusaine over the Drell River Valley. The Lioness was sixteen then. He was chief healer when the Lioness was a page--when the King himself was a page. It was just his time to go, Neal."

Kel felt her own tears begin to slip down her cheeks. She had appreciated Duke Baird too. He had never turned her over when she got into a fight with Joren and the others, and he had always healed her well. He had treated her like the other pages, not as if she would break if he handled her like a boy. Yes, she had loved Duke Baird as well as Neal. She loved Duke Baird because he was Neal's father.

Slowly, Neal turned his eyes to his hand and looked at his father. Kel told him the truth. Duke Baird had died with a smile on his face. He hated to let go of his father's hand, but he knew he would have too. So he loosened his fingers and slid his hand from Duke Baird's, closing the fingers over. "How will I tell my mother?"

"I'll help you," Kel offered, brushing his hair from his eyes.

He looked at her with those emerald colored eyes of his as he caught her hand. "Thank you."

Kel nodded, glad to have made him feel better, even if she couldn't stop the pain he felt. She kissed him on the cheek and moved to get to her feet, but Neal wouldn't let her. His arm curled around her waist as soon as she had kissed his cheek, and he kissed her mouth.

Kel kissed him back before she realized what she had just engaged in. She let her lips linger on his for a moment before pulling away, staring at him. "Neal, we can't..."

"Why not? Doesn't this feel right to you?" he asked her softly.

"You have no idea," she sighed, resting her forehead against his. "But...not here. Not now. We can't do this right now."

He reluctantly let go of her. "As you wish," he told her as he stood. He held a hand out to her and helped her to her feet. "Who do we tell about my father?"

"The king for certain," Kel answered. "Where did Roald go?"

"To get the king, I'd suspect," Neal surmised.

And King Jonathan walked in. "Great Merciful Mother..."