"A food fight, Sam?" Janet questioned.
"He started it by throwing peanuts at me. I had to defend myself." Sam protest prodding a piece of chicken.
"It's a little immature isn't it?"
"I think it only got immature when I dumped the flour on his head. A girl can only have so many peanuts thrown at her." Cassie smiled. "Are we going to tell them?" Sam asked.
"Yeah. I brought the invitations with me."
"Invitations?" Janet questioned.
"Cass." Sam prompted.
"We're throwing General Hammond a birthday party in an upper part of the base on Saturday night. Sam and Jack helped me organise it. We're having a chocolate cake and a Texas cowboy theme."
"Well that explains the cryptic messages."
"Invitations are going out on Monday, but we're trying to keep it a surprise. General Ryan already cleared it and Colonel O'Neill has got an authorisation for the rest of it sorted." Sam expanded.
~ ~ ~
"What are you guys looking at? It's supposed to be our night off." Jack said as he came back rubbing his hair dry with a towel.
"Jacob was just looking at the equation we can't solve." Daniel covered clicking a button to get rid of the image on the screen.
"Any luck?"
"No."
"Did I hear Cassie and Janet arrive?" Jack asked.
"They're in the garden making sure we don't get food poisoning." Jack nodded.
"Did she really almost burn her kitchen down?" Jack asked Jacob.
"Yes. Although she and her room mate weren't overly worried they had a house full of firemen."
"I think Sam is in the wrong line of work if she has a thing for men in uniform." Daniel joked.
"Yeah, difficult to find one of those on a military base right Jack." Jacob added.
"Yeah, she'd have to step all of . . . three feet." He smiled and looked out at the women gathered around his barbeque. "So Teal'c how does it feel to be given a reward for your efforts."
"The only reward I require O'Neill is that Jaffa become free from slavery to false gods."
"Amen to that." Jacob said.
~ ~ ~
"Can I ask you both a question?" Cassie said.
"Sure honey." Janet smiled at her.
"Is it really a good idea to leave four men in a house which has beer in it?"
"Teal'c's symbiote means he can't get drunk. Selmac takes pretty good care of Jacob. Daniel and Jack on the other hand. Sam?"
"Daniel can only take a few, and the Colonel lets just you don't want to see him when he's drunk. He gets very umm Janet what's the word?"
"Worse." Janet offered.
"Worse?" Cassie questioned.
"You see Cass, how Colonel O'Neill is when he's drunk depends on his mood before he got drunk. If he was in a good mood and jokey beforehand he gets happier and starts telling even more jokes, which can be quite entertaining. If he was in a bad mood beforehand he becomes depressed and angry with everyone. Then it's best to avoid him. But it's also usually when he shows up at my door."
"And what do you do with him then?"
"If he's relatively sober, I drive him home but if he's not I let him sleep it off on the couch. One thing I've learnt from our off world camping trips never wake him up when he's asleep unless it's an emergency or his watch, he gets cranky and cranky Colonel's are not good right Janet."
"Yes." Janet agreed. "Especially when he's stuck in the infirmary. Sam you might want to turn those over." Janet pointed to the barbeque.
~ ~ ~
"I suppose I should go and say hello." Jack said.
"Take them a drink." Daniel suggested. Jack headed to the fridge and grabbed a few bottles of beer and a can of cola for Cassie. He stepped out onto the deck.
"So has she burnt anything yet?" Jack called.
"Jack." Cassie smiled.
"Hi, hey Janet."
"Hi Jack. I think someone needs to tidy your kitchen." Janet smiled.
"It was until someone decided that throwing flour was a good idea." Sam hid a smile and prodded the food. "I brought you all a drink." He held out the bottles of beer to Sam and Janet then handed Cass the can. "So what are we all talking about out here?"
"Party plans." Cassie said. "Why what were you all talking about in there?"
"Jacob was telling us that Sam has a thing for firemen."
"Who doesn't?" Janet said before she and Sam cracked up with laughter.
"What did I tell you about giggling Carter?" Jack asked.
"Sorry sir." Sam said biting her lip. "So did you come to take over the cooking?"
"No, it's a woman's job to feed their hungry men." He said with a serious face.
"Cass, do you want to help out here?" Sam asked.
"Sure." She stood on tip toes and clipped Jack around the back of his head.
"Hey." He said rubbing the back of his head. "Whatcha do that for?"
"It was a sexist comment sir. Cassie can't get in trouble for assaulting a higher ranking officer."
"If you talk to Daniel he'll tell you it's historically accurate."
"It maybe, but we live in an equal opportunities society sir. There's laws and everything."
"Really and here I was thinking that we lived in England in the 1890's."
"I know I've been to the past and I know I've been to the future but I'm pretty sure I've never been to England. Am I right Janet?"
"About the past and the future yes. England you'd have to ask Jacob."
"As Jacob what?" Jacob said coming to join them.
"Dad have I ever been to England in the last thirty odd years or in the 1890's?"
"No. Why?" Jacob replied.
"Colonel O'Neill said he thought we lived in England in the 1890's. Just checking."
"Funny." Jack stated.
"How's the food coming? Teal'c's hungry."
"Shouldn't be much longer. We need some plates though."
"I'll take care of that." Jacob said and turned. "Daniel, we need plates." In his loudest voice.
"Yep. Coming." Daniel yelled back. Jacob turned to face the group.
"What? You didn't think I made General by asking people to do things nicely did you." A minute later Daniel and Teal'c joined them carrying a stack of plates and cutlery.
"So what did we miss?" Daniel asked.
"Jack seems to be having a problem with which century and country he's living in." Jacob informed him.
"Really?" Daniel asked. "Janet do you think we should get him to the infirmary?" He managed straight faced.
"Enough already. What is it pick on Jack night?"
"I'm sure we could declare it Pick on Jack night if you like." Cassie teased. "But I'd rather eat."
"Well if everyone is certain that I'm not going to give them food poisoning. It's ready." "I think we're just going to have to trust you. Teal'c you want to go first." Jack slapped Teal'c on the back.
"As you wish O'Neill." Teal'c took a plate and handed it to Sam who filled it with food. He took a corn on the cob and bit into it. "It is very good Major Carter."
"Thank you Teal'c. I think my work here is done." She took a plate for herself and went and sat on the deck.
"Not bad." Jacob said. "Not bad at all."
"Dad, I've tried Tok'ra food it's not good, I even have Jolinar's memories of it. It doesn't improve."
"I've tried but you can't get the Tok'ra rallied round for cookery classes." He joked.
"I'd like to see you try." Jack joked.
"Cass now might be a good time." Sam pointed out.
"Daniel, Teal'c I need you to keep Saturday night free, we're throwing General Hammond a Texas themed surprise birthday party."
"So this is why you've been sneaking around. It'll give Teal'c a chance to wear his new cowboy hat."
"Indeed."
~ ~ ~
"Dad, we'd leave it's getting late." Sam said to her father. Janet and Cassie had left an hour before.
"You can always stay the night there's plenty of room." Jack offered.
"It's nice of you to offer sir but if we stayed you'd make me clean the kitchen up in the morning and I promised I would take Cassie shopping in the morning for an outfit for the party."
"Thanks for inviting me Jack. It's been interesting." Jacob stated. Sam handed him the car keys.
"You know you're welcome anytime Jacob, just don't bring any of your Tok'ra friends. No offence to Selmak."
"She doesn't take any." He said after a second. "She says it has been a most enlightening experience."
"I'll just be a minute Dad, you go and get the car started I just want to say goodbye to the guys."
"Okay Sammie. Goodbye Daniel Teal'c." He called. A chorus of drunken goodbyes came from Daniel and a more solemn goodbye from Teal'c.
"Are you sure you're okay taking Daniel home Teal'c?" Sam asked.
"Indeed I am Major Carter." He replied.
"Okay. Guys I'll see you on Monday and Daniel drink plenty of water before you go to bed. Night."
"Night Sam." Daniel managed. Jack walked her to the door.
"I had fun, thanks sir. It's been a good day."
"It has. Even if I have to clean up tomorrow."
"Well good night sir." She stood on tip toes and kissed his cheek. "And thanks again for all the nice shiny medal."
"You're welcome. I'll see you Monday." He closed the door even more confused than when they had been having the food fight.
"Jack and Sam sitting in a tree. K-I-SS- I - N -G." Daniel sang drunkenly.
"That's enough Danny-boy. Let's get you into the car so Teal'c can drive you home so you can throw up in your own bathroom in the morning." Jack said pulling Daniel to his feet.
"He started it by throwing peanuts at me. I had to defend myself." Sam protest prodding a piece of chicken.
"It's a little immature isn't it?"
"I think it only got immature when I dumped the flour on his head. A girl can only have so many peanuts thrown at her." Cassie smiled. "Are we going to tell them?" Sam asked.
"Yeah. I brought the invitations with me."
"Invitations?" Janet questioned.
"Cass." Sam prompted.
"We're throwing General Hammond a birthday party in an upper part of the base on Saturday night. Sam and Jack helped me organise it. We're having a chocolate cake and a Texas cowboy theme."
"Well that explains the cryptic messages."
"Invitations are going out on Monday, but we're trying to keep it a surprise. General Ryan already cleared it and Colonel O'Neill has got an authorisation for the rest of it sorted." Sam expanded.
~ ~ ~
"What are you guys looking at? It's supposed to be our night off." Jack said as he came back rubbing his hair dry with a towel.
"Jacob was just looking at the equation we can't solve." Daniel covered clicking a button to get rid of the image on the screen.
"Any luck?"
"No."
"Did I hear Cassie and Janet arrive?" Jack asked.
"They're in the garden making sure we don't get food poisoning." Jack nodded.
"Did she really almost burn her kitchen down?" Jack asked Jacob.
"Yes. Although she and her room mate weren't overly worried they had a house full of firemen."
"I think Sam is in the wrong line of work if she has a thing for men in uniform." Daniel joked.
"Yeah, difficult to find one of those on a military base right Jack." Jacob added.
"Yeah, she'd have to step all of . . . three feet." He smiled and looked out at the women gathered around his barbeque. "So Teal'c how does it feel to be given a reward for your efforts."
"The only reward I require O'Neill is that Jaffa become free from slavery to false gods."
"Amen to that." Jacob said.
~ ~ ~
"Can I ask you both a question?" Cassie said.
"Sure honey." Janet smiled at her.
"Is it really a good idea to leave four men in a house which has beer in it?"
"Teal'c's symbiote means he can't get drunk. Selmac takes pretty good care of Jacob. Daniel and Jack on the other hand. Sam?"
"Daniel can only take a few, and the Colonel lets just you don't want to see him when he's drunk. He gets very umm Janet what's the word?"
"Worse." Janet offered.
"Worse?" Cassie questioned.
"You see Cass, how Colonel O'Neill is when he's drunk depends on his mood before he got drunk. If he was in a good mood and jokey beforehand he gets happier and starts telling even more jokes, which can be quite entertaining. If he was in a bad mood beforehand he becomes depressed and angry with everyone. Then it's best to avoid him. But it's also usually when he shows up at my door."
"And what do you do with him then?"
"If he's relatively sober, I drive him home but if he's not I let him sleep it off on the couch. One thing I've learnt from our off world camping trips never wake him up when he's asleep unless it's an emergency or his watch, he gets cranky and cranky Colonel's are not good right Janet."
"Yes." Janet agreed. "Especially when he's stuck in the infirmary. Sam you might want to turn those over." Janet pointed to the barbeque.
~ ~ ~
"I suppose I should go and say hello." Jack said.
"Take them a drink." Daniel suggested. Jack headed to the fridge and grabbed a few bottles of beer and a can of cola for Cassie. He stepped out onto the deck.
"So has she burnt anything yet?" Jack called.
"Jack." Cassie smiled.
"Hi, hey Janet."
"Hi Jack. I think someone needs to tidy your kitchen." Janet smiled.
"It was until someone decided that throwing flour was a good idea." Sam hid a smile and prodded the food. "I brought you all a drink." He held out the bottles of beer to Sam and Janet then handed Cass the can. "So what are we all talking about out here?"
"Party plans." Cassie said. "Why what were you all talking about in there?"
"Jacob was telling us that Sam has a thing for firemen."
"Who doesn't?" Janet said before she and Sam cracked up with laughter.
"What did I tell you about giggling Carter?" Jack asked.
"Sorry sir." Sam said biting her lip. "So did you come to take over the cooking?"
"No, it's a woman's job to feed their hungry men." He said with a serious face.
"Cass, do you want to help out here?" Sam asked.
"Sure." She stood on tip toes and clipped Jack around the back of his head.
"Hey." He said rubbing the back of his head. "Whatcha do that for?"
"It was a sexist comment sir. Cassie can't get in trouble for assaulting a higher ranking officer."
"If you talk to Daniel he'll tell you it's historically accurate."
"It maybe, but we live in an equal opportunities society sir. There's laws and everything."
"Really and here I was thinking that we lived in England in the 1890's."
"I know I've been to the past and I know I've been to the future but I'm pretty sure I've never been to England. Am I right Janet?"
"About the past and the future yes. England you'd have to ask Jacob."
"As Jacob what?" Jacob said coming to join them.
"Dad have I ever been to England in the last thirty odd years or in the 1890's?"
"No. Why?" Jacob replied.
"Colonel O'Neill said he thought we lived in England in the 1890's. Just checking."
"Funny." Jack stated.
"How's the food coming? Teal'c's hungry."
"Shouldn't be much longer. We need some plates though."
"I'll take care of that." Jacob said and turned. "Daniel, we need plates." In his loudest voice.
"Yep. Coming." Daniel yelled back. Jacob turned to face the group.
"What? You didn't think I made General by asking people to do things nicely did you." A minute later Daniel and Teal'c joined them carrying a stack of plates and cutlery.
"So what did we miss?" Daniel asked.
"Jack seems to be having a problem with which century and country he's living in." Jacob informed him.
"Really?" Daniel asked. "Janet do you think we should get him to the infirmary?" He managed straight faced.
"Enough already. What is it pick on Jack night?"
"I'm sure we could declare it Pick on Jack night if you like." Cassie teased. "But I'd rather eat."
"Well if everyone is certain that I'm not going to give them food poisoning. It's ready." "I think we're just going to have to trust you. Teal'c you want to go first." Jack slapped Teal'c on the back.
"As you wish O'Neill." Teal'c took a plate and handed it to Sam who filled it with food. He took a corn on the cob and bit into it. "It is very good Major Carter."
"Thank you Teal'c. I think my work here is done." She took a plate for herself and went and sat on the deck.
"Not bad." Jacob said. "Not bad at all."
"Dad, I've tried Tok'ra food it's not good, I even have Jolinar's memories of it. It doesn't improve."
"I've tried but you can't get the Tok'ra rallied round for cookery classes." He joked.
"I'd like to see you try." Jack joked.
"Cass now might be a good time." Sam pointed out.
"Daniel, Teal'c I need you to keep Saturday night free, we're throwing General Hammond a Texas themed surprise birthday party."
"So this is why you've been sneaking around. It'll give Teal'c a chance to wear his new cowboy hat."
"Indeed."
~ ~ ~
"Dad, we'd leave it's getting late." Sam said to her father. Janet and Cassie had left an hour before.
"You can always stay the night there's plenty of room." Jack offered.
"It's nice of you to offer sir but if we stayed you'd make me clean the kitchen up in the morning and I promised I would take Cassie shopping in the morning for an outfit for the party."
"Thanks for inviting me Jack. It's been interesting." Jacob stated. Sam handed him the car keys.
"You know you're welcome anytime Jacob, just don't bring any of your Tok'ra friends. No offence to Selmak."
"She doesn't take any." He said after a second. "She says it has been a most enlightening experience."
"I'll just be a minute Dad, you go and get the car started I just want to say goodbye to the guys."
"Okay Sammie. Goodbye Daniel Teal'c." He called. A chorus of drunken goodbyes came from Daniel and a more solemn goodbye from Teal'c.
"Are you sure you're okay taking Daniel home Teal'c?" Sam asked.
"Indeed I am Major Carter." He replied.
"Okay. Guys I'll see you on Monday and Daniel drink plenty of water before you go to bed. Night."
"Night Sam." Daniel managed. Jack walked her to the door.
"I had fun, thanks sir. It's been a good day."
"It has. Even if I have to clean up tomorrow."
"Well good night sir." She stood on tip toes and kissed his cheek. "And thanks again for all the nice shiny medal."
"You're welcome. I'll see you Monday." He closed the door even more confused than when they had been having the food fight.
"Jack and Sam sitting in a tree. K-I-SS- I - N -G." Daniel sang drunkenly.
"That's enough Danny-boy. Let's get you into the car so Teal'c can drive you home so you can throw up in your own bathroom in the morning." Jack said pulling Daniel to his feet.
