chapter 4
Disclaimer: I d-d-don't o-o-own D-duh-duh-ragonball Z-Z, o-okay? WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------
Trunks was still tired, so he was still sleeping. Goten was playing cards with Charles, even though Charles didn't like Goten because Goten was poor. Goten was winning because he was good at Uno. Since our main Charectar, Trunks, is still sleeping, I don't see any reason to write about him right now. How annoying do you think it would be if someone wrote about YOU if you were sleeping? Well, frankly I'd think that would be pretty d*mn good to have anyone writing about me at all, but....
Vegeta, Bulma and Bulla had gone home from the mall, and Akurei and Kilo had joined them. Akurei was still mad at Kilo for his terrible behaivor at the stupid food court thingy. "That burger costed me an intire 99 cents. What a little brat." Akurei kept whining. "You know how hard it is to get a decent job when you have a french accent. Do you?" He pounded the table. "If....it would be better, maybe I have 4 quarters? That's 100 cents." Vegeta said. He dug 4 quarters out of his pocket. He held them out. "Better?" He asked. Akurei took them with a smile. "Much better." He said. "So how have things been around here?" He asked. "Well, Bulma got kidnapped the other night by a big fat guy." Vegeta said. "So my son, trunks and Kakarot's son, Goten went to find her." Vegeta took a big old bite of applesauce, and it ran all down his face. It came to his attention that Bulla and Kilo were watching something out the window, but he thought nothing of it. He grabbed a napkin and wiped it off. Akurei nodded. "Wish my life was that exiting. I get up, go to my job at the gas station, come home, and sleep." vegeta took another bite. "Dont u single guys ever go to clubs, or anything like that?" Akurei nodded. "Once in a while, I'll getta one night stand." Vegeta and Bulma laughed really hard. "But it never lasts long." Said the depressed Akurei. Veggie and Bulma looked at eachother awkwardly. "Do you think he ever actually GETS one?" Bulma mouthed. Vegeta shook his head with a big old grin. Akurei was staring at his pink placemat. Bulla ran up to Vegeta. "Papa, Papa!" She screamed. Kilo was pulling on Akurei's pants. "Daddy, daddy!" He said. "WHAT?!" The two fathers roared at the same time. Vegeta's was gentler sounding, though. "Can I have a Horsie? There was just a man riding a horsie down the road!" Bulma jumped out of her chair. "No no no no no no no! The answer is NO!" She was gripping Vegeta's arm so hard her fingers were white. "No! Your not going to get her one, are you Vegeta?!" Vegeta looked up at Bulma with a look of someone who is very angry. Then he got up and dragged Bulma into the living room. "What am I supposed to say?" he asked feircly. "Just tell her 'no'? Just like that?" Bulma nodded, her hands on her hips. "You say it to Trunks all the time, but it usually comes out 'NO WAY YOU D*MN LITTLE BRAT'."Vegeta looked at the floor. "But this is different." "HOW is it different?" "Fine." Vegeta said. "YOU tell her so she'll spare me the drama." So they walked back in the kitchen, where Bulma promply told Bulla no, and Bulla threw a fit so she got sent to her room. It had just taken a simple no from Akurei to make Kilo shut up. Vegeta felt very bad, and he wished that the stupid man who rode his stupid horse down the stupid street were dead.
It was time for Vegeta and Bulma to go to sleep, but they coulden't because Bulla was screaming and hollering and pucning the ground as hard she she could. "SHUT UP!" Bulma screamed. her eyes had popped open for the 15th time that night. Vegeta's had never closed because Bulla was so annoying. "We have to do something about this mess." Bulma said, putting a pillow over her ears. "We could send her with Trunks?" Vegeta asked, meaning it to be a joke. "OKAY!" Bulma said. When she learned Vegeta wasn't serious, she was very dissapointed. "What did we do wrong with this d*mn child?" Bulma mumbled. Vegeta thought of all the times Bulma had told Bulla no and he had done her bidding. "Maybe it's because she's a girl." Vegeta said. "Maybe girls are stubborn and mean. Like someone in this room." Bulma groaned, and pounded the pillow into her ears so hard Vegeta thought it would go into her brain. But one night of no sleep was enough for Vegeta. He knew what he had to do.
"So which one won't die?" Vegeta asked the shriveled old lady. He was at a.....Horse Ranch?! What are you thinking, Vegeta? Bulma's going to KILL you! Well,their marriage is none of our buisness. "It will die, eventually. His name is Philocteetee." Vegeta laughed. "What a stupid fag name! Gimme a horse that doesn't sound like a priss! The lady trotted out a beige colored Palimino horse. "His name is Mr. Brown." Vegeta shook his head. "My daughter needs one who isn't boring." She trotted out a solid brown horse. "His name is Caca." She said. "Please do not laugh, but my granchildren named him." vegeta thought. "I like this one better, but lets see more.' He walked down the hall of horsie stalls. He wanted Bulla's horse to be perfect. Vegeta eyed another Palimino cream colored horse in a stall. As soon as it saw Vegeta, it tried to kick his @$$. "I like this one!" Vegeta said. The lady came up. "His name is freakinmeanwaterkappa. But we call him Kappa for short." (Kappa is a japanese water demon in a legend). "Cool!" Vegeta said. "Get im out!" He watched as the lady took him out. he was in chains, and as soon as he was free, he kicked tge lady and her head bashed against a rock. "Kappa likes to lift up his tail and CRAP on desighner rugs." She said with disgust. "Good thing we don't have any." Vegeta said. "Hi there, Kappa." Kappa blew a ball of snot in Vegeta's face. "UGHIO!!!" He screamed. "That was sicky!" He wiped his face with a hankie, that he got from his pocket. "I like this kappa. How much." "(Censored)"*The price was real high* "WHAT THE HOLY HE**?" Vegeta yelled. "That's too much for a horse!" But then he thought about his beauty sleep, and how grouchy Bulma was when she didn't get sleep, so he gave the lady a wad of bills. "So, does he sleep in the garage?" Vegeta asked. "Does he eat.....dog food?" *So, Vegeta went through a long and perilous lesson about what Horses eat and where they sleep.
Vegeta swung open the living room door, holding the horses bridle, which was attached to the freakin horse. "IM HOME!" He yelled. Bulma ran in. "Hi, honey. Whats that u got there?" He stepped into the living room,and the horse followed. "TAH DAHHH!" He said. Bulma's face screwed up. "i told you NO!" She yelled, and Vegeta was caught in a Barrage of painful slaps. "Do you know how much these dumb animals cost?" She was so mad, she thought the horse looked 10 times more handsome than Vegeta right now. And at this moment, she loved the horse 10 times more than Vegeta, too. "Your such a freak!" She ran up the stairs and into their room, and locked the door. Vegeta shrugged. He wanted to show Bulla her present right now. "PRINNNNNCESSSS!!!" He yelled. He heard her trotting down, screaming for a horsie. When she walked into the room, she ran up and hugged the horsie. "Thank you papa thank you papa thank you papa thank you papa...." She went on and on, and Vegeta lead her and Kappa outside and watched her ride him for a while. He thought she was really good for a 7 year old. Then, he figured he outta go up and check on his wife, so he started up the stairs. He didn't hear anything, so he kicked in the door. She wasn't in there, but the window was open. "Funny. I never heard her come out." Vegeta said. There was a note, written on the heart shaped paper tacked to the wall. She often left him notes when she went out shopping, so he wripped it off the wall and read it. She was so mad when she wrote it, her words dug into the paper and ripped. It said, 'Dear Vegeta you troll, your so stupid i told you not to get a horse for her and you obviously dont care what i think so im LEAVING you here all alone! I dont know when or if i'll be back! Toodles!" Vegeta stared at the bottom of the paper. It usually said 'love Bulma' with big old hearts that were out of proportion, but not this time. he crumped the note in his hand. "She'll be back tonight." Vegeta said. "Without me, she has no one to get her jollies with." For that, he thought was what she only cared about. Vegeta went into the living room and dialed Akurei's number. When he picked up, Vegeta laughed into the phone. "Bulma thinks she left me." Vegeta said. "But she'll be back." Akurei cleared his throat. "She's HERE.' Akurei said. "Annoying the hell out of me. If I had a .34 calliber rifle I'd--" Vegeta rolled his eyes and interrupted. "Lemme talk to her." Vegeta said. He heard talking in the background, and he heard Bulma in the background saying 'I DONT WANNA TALK TO THAT SON OF A *BLEEP* WHO DOESN'T EVEN LIKE ME ONE BIT!" God she sounded annoying. "I get the drift." Vegeta said in the phone. "Tell Bulma to take a chill pill." And he hung up the phone. Boy, was he mad. He coulden't beleive she had such nerve.
Trunks hung up the phone, a look of sheer agonizing suprise on his face. "What is it?" Goten asked. "What's wrong? Lemme guess, It's a new enemy." He sighed, and got ready to fly away. "Nope, worse." Trunks said. "My mom and dad are separated. My mom left dad for buying a horse, and she doesn't know if she'll be back. " "Wait wait wait, back up." Goten said. "Bought a horse? Why did he do a stupid thing like that?" Trunks shrugged. "Probley my little sister wanted it." "But......why would ur mom leave ur dad? I thought she loved him, or whatever?" Trunks shrugged. "I guess she's tired of him not doing what she asks. I mean, he NEVER does." Goten nodded. "Trunks....um, do you think she'll come back?" To Goten's suprise, Trunks laughed. "I don't know. She's staying with that single dad, Akurei. Vegeta says that Akurei said they're just friends, but I don't know. That Akurei guy is really good looking, and everything, and I don't know if she will." Then Trunks' eyes got big. "But dad relys on mom for like....everything! Cooking, cleaning....washing his clothes, AND maintaining his precious 'gravity room'." Goten nodded. "Your right! And if she stays gone, the money will run out. Your dad doesn't work." Trunks shook his head. "Mom will send checks to dad, I know she will, because of Bulla." (Did you notice Im just using this paragraph to explain everything thats going on? =))"Okay." Goten said. "But I think mother will come back." Trunks said. "She was probley so angry she wasn't thinking straight."
"Oh, GOD!" Bulma yelled. "he makes me so MAD, going out to buy a horse when I asked him not to!" She was, for the 17th time, explaining to Akurei why she was so mad at Vegeta. "I know, I know." Akurei said. "Can I please, please go to sleep? I'm sooooo tired." Bulma paced back and forth across the kitchen. "I don't know who he thinks he is!" Bulma said. "He has to listen to me SOMETIMES! That's not fair that I have to make his sandwiches, draw his baths, and fix the gravity room! He should have to listen to me!" Akurei looked at the tile on his dirty kitchen floor, and it suprised him when there were no grooves in it from her pacing. "I think your overreating" Akurei said. "He really wanted to talk to you, but you woulden't talk to him." Bulma made a childish sound. "Well, Im going to ignore him for at least a week so he knows what it is like to make me MAD!" Akurei shook his head. "That's stupid." he said. "Your acting like Kilo here." Kilo was playing with a truck in the kitchen floor. The heat between Kilo and Akurei had dissolved. "I am not acting like a 7 year old! Mr. Vegeta can't take care of himself and listen to me at the same time, then we'll see how far he gets." "Okayyy...." Akurei said. "But what if this goes so far and you go back and Vegeta doesn't want you back? What if he finds someone else and you get divorced!" Bulma shrugged. "Of course vegeta will want me back! Nobody else has the patience to waide on him." Akurei nodded. "That's true. And the guys like me who do stuff for themselves never get girls." Bulma hit Akurei in the head. "Stop wallowing in self pity. You wanna wife, buy one on the internet." She ran back to the back of the small apartment.
Vegeta was watching Bulla play outside with the horsie and thinking about things. There was a pack of trunks cigerattes(Vegeta knew Trunks had accidently left them there when he came home to search for Bulma) on the counter. The feeling he had was intense stress, and he knew what cigerattes could do.....They could give you temporary relief, and then you pay for it with your life with lung cancer. (My poor uncle!) Vegeta shrugged. "Im strong enough to beat a stupid old lung cancer." And he popped a cigeratte in his mouth and lit it up. This wasn't his first one. Maybe his seventh, but Bulma didn't know that. The lighter burnt Vegeta's fingers because he was new at this. "Yeow!" He screamed. Then he inhaled, and he sputtered and coughed like a 70 year old with Emphazimia. "Yuck!" He exclaimed. "That's awful!" Vegeta spit out the cigeratte. He had forgotten their terrible taste. He already didn't feel to well, and he didn't want to throw up, so he threw the cigeratte down on the ground and mashed it with his shoe. Then he went into the kitchen, and he grabbed a beer. That was another way he could sometimes forget temporarily all his troubles, getting drunk. He knew how incredibly stupid drinking was, but hey, he was a man and his wife would be gone for a while. He may as well enjoy being the closest thing to single he ever would be again, or at least that's the way Vegeta chose to look at it. Mentally, this whole thing disturbed him. He brought the bottle up and took a long drink. Veggie didn't really like the taste of this stuff that Bulla called 'pee pee water' but it was better than cigerattes, and really cold. So he guzzled the intire thing down, and he was going to have another, but then he remembered he was Bulla's only guardian right now and if he got drunk he might do something really, really stupid. That was Vegeta. So he thought of other ways he could forget what was happening to him. "I know!" He said, out loud. "I'll go train so hard my muscles feel like freakin rubber....then, I'll concentrate on the pain, not the wife leaving me thing." So he went out to the gravity room and trained hard for about 5 hours. When he came out, his muscles were extrememly rubbery and painful. He usually took periodic breaks in between. Vegeta put a towel around his neck because he was sweating like a pig, and took a drink of the soda he always carried out to the gravity chamber. Then he crushed the can and littered it on the front lawn. Breaking laws, even small ones, gave him a since of satisfaction, like it does everyone.
"Did you get the money yet?!" Lutenant Bonerz yelled into his most rebellious student's face. "I SAID, DID YOU GET THE MONEY GET?! trunks wiped spittle off his face. "No, my parents are mean. Like you. Your mean." He was putting on his 'little kid' act. Laughter bursted out, but Charles didn't laugh. "WELL YOU BETTER GET IT OR I'LL WORK THE MONEY OUT OF YOUR SWEAT!" (He meant Trunks was going to do alot of pushups) "NOW YOU DROP DOWN AND GIMME 500!" "12345678910..." Trunks counted as he did 500 pushups in his lightning speed, and jumped back up, not even sweating. "That was easy!" Trunks said. "My dad makes me do 5000 in 300X gravity, you dolt!" Bonerz grabbed Trunks by the neck and shook him all around. Then he remembered that was child abuse and put him down. (HA HA this next part is great because Trunks gets his revenge)Trunks went behind Bonerz. Bonerz thought that trunks was going back to his tent to think about his disrespect. "That's right, soldier!" Bonerz said. "You go back and think about how worthless you are!" Trunks eyed the back of Bonerz, debating on whether to pound him or just give him a black eye, when he saw them. White boxer shorts, sticking out of Bonerz' pants. Trunks did the only thing he could think of.....grabbed the back of them and yanked, half as hard as he could, which was pretty hard. Bonerz thought he was going to be ripped in two! "OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" He screamed, and whirled around. "SOLDIER!" He screamed, and he chased Trunks. Trunks flew up into a tree. "I don't know how you just did that." Bonerz said. "But you come down, right this very instant." Trunks shook his head. "No! I won't!" He spit on Bonerz' head. All the other students in the class were laughing hystericcly. "COME DOWN, MAGGOT!" trunks picked up a fire ant and tossed it on Bonerz. It sank it's pinscers into his arm. "OW!" he screamed. He tossed the ant off and proceeded to try and scale the tree! "OH NO!" trunks said. "If he get's up here, I'm as good as dead!" He climbed higher. Bonerz was on the first branch. second. third. trunks leaped to the next tree. "You stop it right now!" Bonerz said, climbing down and getting on the other tree. trunks kept moving, and Bonerz tried to catch him for a suprising three hours.
"Your not cleaning out your sink right." Bulma grouched. "I do everything myself around here." Akurei said. "I think that I know how to clean a sink!" Bulma grabbed the S.O.S pad from Akurei. "No, you have to SCRUB IT HARD, or the food stuck to the bottom of the sink will get all over the dishes, and then they'll taste and smell bad. And if you put oranges down the drain, it'll smell better." Akurei grinned. This would be okay, having a 17-year housewife to tell him what he'd been doing wrong. "And, I noticed something else that disturbed me. You don't clean your toilet. And when you do, you don't do it good enough!" She conked Akurei on the head with a toilet plunger. "All of you men are helpless." (Bulma's just saying that because she's mad. But without men, she woulden't be here, and if men can make babies, they can't be helpless, can they)She grabbed Akurei's shirt sleeve and drug him into the bathroom. "Now put this toilet plunger down there." "This toilet doesn't flush." Akurei said. "You have to use the other bathroom; this toilet's broke." He didn't move. "That's my whole point." Bulma said. Put it down there. The suction will pull out whatever is stuck." He put the toilet plunger down there, pressed down hard and pulled up. Akurei's ROLEX watch, A Barney the Dinosaur toy, and other things were in there. "See what I mean?" Bulma asked. She put some toilet paper in the toilet and flushed it down. "See how easy it is to fix everyday problems?" Akurei nodded. "Now can you show me how to get rid of those ugly scum rings in the bathtub?" Bulma laughed. "I'm suprised you even know how to MAKE a bath. I have to do it for Vegeta." They both got a good laugh out of that, even though Vegtea was Akurei's best freind. Bulma showed Akurei that Scrubbing Bubbles was the best way. Akurei thought Scrubbing Bubbles were a cheap way to get high, but he'd never tried it. He kept the bottle under the cabinet for emergencies.
Vegeta's muscles hurt really bad. The only thing that ever helped was a bath. But the only problem was that Vegeta didn't know how to draw a bath. He stared at the empty porcelain. It was one of those fancy baths built for husbands and wives, you know the ones with the shelves you can put the candles on? He tried to imagine water inside it. But it didn't work, no suprise. "Maybe it's this thingy." He said to himself. He tapped the shower head. "Hello? Water?" He stepped inside the bathtub and looked into the shower head. His hip hit the botton, and water sprayed all in his face. "*COUGH COUGH* Gosh." Vegeta was spitting out water and stuff. As soon as his hip left the button, the water stopped because he hadn't pushed the button in far enough for it to stay. "More?" Vegeta said. "Only not in my face." But then he realized that this was not the right way to put water in the bath. This was for a SHOWER. He tapped and hit on the other device, the faucet. Then he saw the two nobs underneath it. he sat down in the bath and turned the hot water nob all the way up. "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!" vegeta yelled so loud Bulla heard outside. He was scorched and blistered. He turned the other knob up as far as it would go, too. Now both hot and cold were as high as they could go. "Perfect." Vegeta said.He's wearing shorts, because I don't wanna write about a naked Vegeta. Heck, I dont even wanna imagine a naked Vegeta! The bath water was really smelly though. That's when he noticed an ugly brownish greenish ring around the bath. "EW!" He said. Bits of the nasty substance was coming off in his bath water. "Coulden't you have cleaned before you left?" Vegeta asked. Then he cursed himself. He decided he wanted to call Bulma on her cell and see if she would talk to him. He grabbed his cell phone(Dont ask why he had it by the bath, what a dumb*ss) and dialed the number. It rang and rang. The beep came on for the cell's voice mail. "This is Bulma. Leave me a message and I'll get back to you if your worth it. Leave your message after the annoying beep." Vegeta took a deep breath. "Its Vegeta. Pick up." he said. Nothing. "I know your there. Pick up the phone right now." Still nothing. "I managed to make a bath for myself." Vegeta said. Bulma picked up the phone. "Really? YOU!" She was laughing hard. "That's enough." Vegeta said. "I needa know how to get rid of soap scum rings in the bath, okay?" Bulma was silent for a while. "Im trying to decide if I should tell you. Making your first bath AND cleaning it is a little much for you." Vegeta was sad. "Why do you have to be such a B*tch? I just called to say hello and this is the thanks that I get." "Maybe I didn't WANT you to say hello right now." Vegeta sighed. "What can I do to make you happy at me again?" "You figure it out, Poindexter!" Bulma said. "Buh bye!" She hung up on poor Vegeta. He was really sad. But knew what he must do. He would ask Trunks what to get her, and shower her with gifts. Then maybe, she'd come back and cook for him. It made Vegeta hungry just thinking about it, but he didn't know how to make anything.
*RING RING* "You don't answer that Cell Phone, Soldier!" Bonerz spat into trunks' face. "Your not even supposed to have Cell Phones in the physical punishment room!" Trunks decided to make up a herrendous lie. "Well, My mother is.....she has problems with her....her hips, and sometimes she falls, and she lives all alone....so sometimes she needs someone she can call to send paramedics after her." Bonerz raised a brow. "I met your mother AND your father. They seemed perfectly happy together, wcich means they must live together, and your mother's hips looked fine." trunks tried to think of another lie to cover up his first one. "Well, dad is away on a buisness trip in the Himalayas, and my mothers hips only act up on some days. She called me this morning and told me today was a bad day." Trunks smiled because he had managed to fool Bonerz. He could see it in his face. "So can I take this call?" trunks asked. But quickly, he added, "Actually, I don't care what you say, Im taking it anyway." He stepped out of the Physical Punishment room and flipped open the phone. He had seen on the caller ID that it was from his dad's cell phone. "What is it, Dad?" He asked. vegeta noted that he sounded realived. "Is it important? I hope so, so you can keep me out longer.....Im in the physical punsihment room....may I tell you how much I dispise you for sending me here?" Vegeta cleared his throat. "Son, Im not even going to ask you what you did to land yourself in Physical Punsishment this time, or what your doing in there, but I am going to ask you something important." Trunks wondered what it could be. "As you know, me and your mother.....are separated at the moment, due to reasons beyond my will." trunks was suprised because he had always thought that if they sepearated, Vegeta would be the one to leave because he was such a jerk. "And I want to shower Bulma with gifts so that maybe she will come back and fix me a lunch." What a selfish reason. Trunks thought, and he said into the phone, "So you want me to tell you what to get her?" "yes." Vegeta responded. A blowdryer was running in the background, so Trunks figured that Vegeta had just been in the bath. "I don't know." Trunks said. "I've never really gotten a girl anything...not even my girlfriends." Vegeta thought about Gohan's daughter, Pan, and Rememered trunks had gotten her something on her bithday. "I just call them every day on the phone, and that seems to be enough." "What about that time she had a birthday?" Vegeta asked. "I rememer you spent most of your allowance savings on a present for her. What was it again?" trunks was embarrased. "It was......a new stereo and a whole bunch of CDs." he said. "But mother woulden't like those because she's not young and hip. But whatever you do, don't tell her that you want her to come home and make you a lunch." Vegeta heard a raw voice in the background, calling trunks' name. "Gotta go, dad. Seeya." Trunks clicked the cell phone closed and stepped into the Physical punishment room. "Bout time you got back, soldier. Now, I want you to do 100 chin-ups on the bar. NOW!" Trunks ran over, and he grabbed the Chin Ups bar. He lifted himself up 100 times, his chin going over the bar, in about 3 minutes. He was running on slow today because he had just been chased for 3 hours by Bonerz.
"Could I have a sandwich?" Akurei asked. "I'm really hungry, and I'm tired from all that training." Bulma got up, and sloppily fixed him a sandwich. "Merci." Akurei said. (French for 'thank you' or 'please')He grabbed it and began eating. "I wonder what Vegeta will choose to do for me." Bulma said. "Maybe he will get us tickets on a boat cruise, or to the Carribean!" Akurei looked at her. "Your dreaming." He said. "After all you put him through, you really think he'll get boat tickets? I don't know if he even wants you back, for Christ's sake." Bulma's eyes got wide, and her mouth opened into a big old 'o'. "Of course he does! What would he do without me? I cook his food, and I clean his gravity chamber." Akurei shrugged. Kilo suddenly ran up. "Daddy! Daddy's friend's wife!" he was running around Bulma's legs. "What is it?" Akurei asked. "What in the name of god is so exiting?!" Kilo jumped into Akurei's lap. "They're having a special at Putt Putt golf! Tickets are only $5.95, but only today! We gotta go, please please please?" "Wellll." Akurei said, going to say no because he was tired, "Sure, fine. We'll go!" Bulma ran into the kitchen. "I'll make water bottles and sandwiches!" Akurei rolled his eyes. He was awfully tired of having Bulma around. She was a neat freak sometimes, and she was VERY beyond all purpose annoying. Then he got an idea. "I know!" He said to himself so Bulma coulden't hear, "I'll tell Vegeta to meet us there, and neither one will know the other one is there!" He raced to the old fasioned phone on the wall and dialed Vegeta's number. "Vegeta! Vegeta!" He said as soon as it was picked up. "I've got something to invite you to...I want you to come to Putt Putt golf with me an Kilo. Bring Bulla, too." Akurei saw Bulla as a way to get Vegeta and Bulma back togather. He had a plan to tell her to do. Vegeta was silent for a moment. "Isn't Bulma staying with you? I won't come if she's going to be there because she will make fun of me." Akurei made up something, not knowing how mad it would make Vegeta. "NO!" Akurei said. "She's staying with....um.....Yamcha!" Vegeta's blood began to boil, and he got more angry that he'd ever been. He screamed so loud Akurei's ear was going to fall off, "NO WAY! NOT HIM! ANYONE BUT HIM! GOSH IM GOING TO SMASH HIM IM GOING OVER THERE RIGHT NOW AND SHOW HIM WHOS BOSS GOSH!" Akurei knew Vegeta was dangerously close to dropping the phone and running to Yamcha's to kill him. Akurei had forgotten that Bulma and Yamcha were X-boyfriend/girlfriend and they had almost gotten married, but then Bulma met Vegeta and Blah blah blah, you all know the story by now. Vegeta was really funny about Bulma hanging out around Yamcha. "NO!" Akurei said. "Dont go over there yet......After Putt Putt we can both get revenge on....Yamcha." Akurei thought that Vegeta would stop wanting to smash Yamcha if he saw that Bulma was not really staying with him. But he was wrong.(Oooohh.. can you predict what's going to happen to Yamcha......for no reason at all? I can, and it won't be pretty....poor Yamcha! He's one of my favorites!)
Vegeta showed up at Putt Putt with Bulla to meet Akurei and Kilo. They were already here, as Vegeta could see. The car was parked in the driveway. He wondered why they hadn't capsuled it. Probley to show off the new car they had gotten for cheap from the Capsule Corp. "Papa, where's Kilo and Kilo's daddy?" "They're already inside the park, Princess." "Well then, where's Mommy?" Vegeta's breath caught in his throat. Should I tell her? He thought. He decided on not. "Um, Bulla, Mommy is staying at a freinds house for a while, she won't be back for.....i don't know when." He was hoping Bulla woulden't ask anymore questions, and his prayers were answered. Thank Supreme Kai! Vegeta noticed Kilo and Akurei as he entered the park. What he didn't notice was the very slim, blue haired pretty lady buiying cokes at the snack stand with her back to them. "Hey, buddy." Akurei said. Bulla and Kilo wandered off to play mini golf. "Let's play some golf." Vegeta said. "I bet I can beat you!" Akurei stood still. "What, are you waiting for somebody?" Vegeta asked. "If so, who? If it's Yamcha, I'll-" Just then, the pretty, slim lady turned around. Bulma saw Vegeta and Vegeta saw Bulma at the same instant. Akurei realized this. Their eyes locked on eachothers for a while, then Bulma turned away. She looked furious. She stomped toward Akurei. "WHAT IS HE DOING HERE?!" She spat in his face. "I um....I um....I thought she was staying with Yamcha?" Vegeta said. "Yamcha?" Bulma asked. "Why would I stay with a dumb*ss like him! See what low expectations Vegeta has for me?!" She started punching blindly at her husband. He caught her wrists in his hands and said, "You set us up, didn't you?!" Akurei whispered something in French and turned his head. "WHAT?!" Vegeta asked. "So we can hear you, NOW!" Bulma was still struggling in Vegeta's iron grip, and he thought it was pretty funny. "I said 'Oui'(Pronounced 'wee'), the french word for....Yes." Vegeta growled. "Why did you do this? You know she doesn't want to see me!" Bulma's fingernail drove itself painfully in one of Vegeta's hands that was holding her wrists. He let go on reflex and she slapped him right across the face. A large red mark was left. "First you think I cheated on you because you think I was a whore, then u come here because you saw his car! Your stalking me, I know you are...." She went on and on. "SHUT THE H*LL UP!" Akurei said. "He came here because I told him to. He didn't have any idea you were hear. He thought you were staying with Yamcha because I told him you were, because Im tired of you guys fighting, and frankly Bulma, Im tired of you living in my house!" Bulma's eyes teared up. "You don't like me living with you?" Akurei shook his head. "Not one bit." Bulma's face got mad again. "Well that doesn't change the fact that he--" Akurei shoved Bulma and Vegeta both in a roller coster cart(Sometimes they have little carnival things at Putt Putt) and pushed down the bar. It locked so they couldent move. They were stuck side by side on a roller coaster! Bulma struggled. "Let me out!" She screamed. "Right now! Right now!" Vegeta clapped a hand over her mouth. "Kai! Do you ever shut up? It's locked, so you might as well sit back and enjoy the ride." Bulma recognized that as the exact same line Vegeta had said to her on their honeymoon nite. That P*ssed her off even more than before. And she hated roller coasters. Akurei hoped this would help them like eachother again. He watched as the roller coaster started up. Vegeta liked it pretty well, because he was used to flying in circles and loops. So it was nothing new to him. But you coulden't tell by looking at his face. Bulma was screaming and yelling and on occasion she would slap Vegeta in the face. Once he grabbed her wrist and said something in her face. Akurei thought it was a threat. Then he wrenched her wrist backwards so she screamed, than turned the other way. When it ended, Vegeta had his arms crossed and a sour look on his face. "I want to go home." He said. "Go ahead!" Bulma said. "It'd make MY DAY much happier!" Vegeta was so mad he wanted to blow off her head. But he didn't. "You do realize that I could destroy you at any minute, right?" Vegeta said. He lit up a powerball. "With this little ball, I could destroy u! You'd be dead before you hit the freakin ground!" Bulma wasn't even scared. "Ha! You'd never hurt me because you love me too much!" "Wanna bet your LIFE on it?" he said. He shot the powerball so close to her face she could feel the heat of it. It flew into a tree. "Um....vegeta...." Akurei said. Vegeta ignored him. "I could scratch your eyes out!" Bulma said, making her fingers with really long fingernails into hooks. She looked like an idiot. "No, you love ME too much." Vegeta said. Bulma swiped at Vegeta's face. Not as close as he had shot the powerball, though. About 2 inches away from his face. You could tell she was trying to make sure she didn't hit him. "Vegeta!" Akurei said, more urgently. Vegeta ignored him further. "Your really mean!" Bulma said. "Your really bossy!" Vegeta said. "Your really stupid!" Bulma said. "Your really.....really....freakish!" Bulma bursted out laughing at the insult. "Freakish?" She said. "When did you think of that one?" "Vegeta!!!" Akurei said. Vegeta ignored him. "VEGETA YAMCHA'S HERE!!" Akurei said. Yamcha was walking toward them. "Hi Gu--" Yamcha was punched into a tree so hard 3 teeth flew out. A large bruise appeared. Bulma stood back and watched. You could tell she really wanted to cheer for Vegeta. "What was that for?" Yamcha asked. Vegeta drop- kicked him in the stomach, and he flew clear over the golf feilds. Then, vegeta took to the air and went after the flying Yamcha. Bulma got on Akurei's back and they flew over to watch. Yamcha was getting the beating of his life. Vegeta was punching him in the face and stomach. Blood flew out of his mouth and nose, and ears as well. He still hand't lost consience. Vegeta applied a swift kick to Yamcha's ribs, breaking three of them. Yamcha then lost concience. Vegeta drop kicked Yamcha into a nearby hospital. "JUST A REMINDER!" Vegeta screamed after him. "YOU HAVE TO MOW MY LAWN EVERY TEUSDAY FOR NO PAY!" Yamcha had never heard of that before.
Vegeta, the next day, was at a jewelry store. he was going to get a present for Bulma. "She already has an engagement ring and a wedding ring." Vegeta said. "So it can't be a ring. It has to be a necklace." He was talking to the clerk. The clerk showed him all the different necklaces he could get with real diamonds in them. "I don't think I like any of these." He said, even though Bulma had been looking at them a week ago and wanted them all,"I think I'll get her something else." He was turning to go out, when a strange charectar stepped in the door. He pulled out a gun. "This is a stick up!" He said. Nobody move!" Vegeta continued walking. "I don't have time for this." He said. "Outta my way." Then Vegeta realized what the guy was doing. "Hey!" He said. He charged up a powerball. The man was terrified at this...'light thingy' growing out of Vegeta's hand, so he shot 3 times. They all hit Vegeta in the left leg and he pitched to the ground with his leg shattered. Vegeta screamed and powered up, then he shot a series of Gologan Fires at the Burglar, killing him as soon as the first one hit. "That stupid F*ck*r!" Vegeta roared. "He shot my leg! He HURT my leg!" He tried to pick up his leg so he could examine the damage in his leg and spandex, but his leg woulden't respond. The clerk was on the phone with an ambulance. Vegeta wondered why. "My leg's just a littler hurt." He said. His voice came out croaky. "Get off that phone, fat baldy." The man kept talking. Vegeta lifted up his head and looked at him leg. Ity was in a strange 'z' shape and was bleeding everywhere. He almost swooned and fainted, but he didn't.
"I need out of here for one day." Trunks said to Bonerz. he was on one knee. Bonerz was amused that Trunks was kneeling to him for something. "Why would I do that for you?" Bonerz asked. "Your parents didn't pay the fee for days off." "That's the thing!" Trunks said. "My dad broke his leg, he's in the hospital and I WANT OUT!" he was so angry he considered blowing off Bonerz' head. "I'll pay the fee." trunks said. "I got money!" Bonerz was suprised at the amount of money the kid pulled out. 3 thousand. "You still haven't paid for the damages you caused on the school grounds." Bonerz said. "You can't pay me when you owe already. Plus--the parents have to pay it." Trunks sighed. "I'll pay you....double." The fee was 50 dollars. He pulled out a hundred. Bonerz looked faintly interested, but shook his head. "I'll pay.....triple." He looked even more interested, but shook his head. "I'll pay you........quadroople!" Bonerz nodded and grabbed the money from Trunks. He put the fee in the fee basket and took the extra for himself, shoving it in his pocket. "Deal." he said. Trunks began to fly up into the air, going to blast out of a window. Bonerz got up off his swiveling chair. He pointed a shaking finger at Trunks. "Just what are you?" He said. "You can....fly? Your weird! A freak of nature! Stay away from me!!!" Trunks lowered. "Ooppsss...I forgot I'm not supposed to fly in front of people. Sorry I have to do this..." He grabbed a candle holder and bashed Bonerz in the head to knock him out. "Hopefully you won't remember anything." Trunks said. "Or hopefully the police will think you were going nuts." And Trunks decided to use the door so the story woulden't match up.
"Get me out of here!" Vegeta said, struggling in a stretcher as they wheeled him into the emergency room. "I'm fine! I can fly to get around!" "He's obviously delerious!" The doctor shouted. "Get me some Morphine before we take him into surgery!" Vegeta was bewildered. "What? I don't need surgery! I'm fine! Just let me go beat the Sh*t out of those robbers that shot me!" A nurse was sopping up blood that was coming out of Vegeta's leg. Vegeta kicked and she flew into a wall, and pain exploded through his leg. "OWCH!" He screamed. He looked at his leg. The bullet holes were more visible now that there wasn't as much blood because she sopped it up. "We'll need a blood transfusion." The doctor said. "I need to know what type of blood he takes." A nurse stuck a long needle into the vein in the crook of Vegeta's elbow. "OW!" Vegeta said. He slapped at the needle, but when the doctors tried to hold him down, he let them. The nurse, after getting blood, ran into a testing room with the needle vile full of it. They wheeled Vegeta into an operating room. "We're going to put you to sleep with some gas so you won't feel anything." The doctor said. They tried to put a big ugly mask on his face. "Get that off of me! I--" They shoved it over his face so his voice was muffled. They flipped a switch and some sort of smelly gas started coming into the mask. "Count backward from 100." The doctor said. "By the time you get to 95, you'll be asleep."
* * *
"54321....0. I'm at zero. I thought you said I'd be asleep at 95." The doctor had an openmouthed glare. "This man won't go to sleep! His nervous system is amazing!" He put the gas on high. "Sir, if you don't go to sleep soon, we'll have to cut you while your awake with nothing but anesteshia!" Vegeta shrugged. He was getting a little woozy from the higher gas, but nothing special. "Is that the best you got?" Vegeta said. He didn't want to be cut while he was awake. A nurse shoved a long needle into his skin. It was filled with some fluid that would make him sleep. Then, his eyes grew heavy and he FINALLY went to sleep.
"What?!" Bulma screamed into the phone. "What in the hell? You say Vegeta got shot in the leg three times?" She was talking to a doctor on the phone. "Yes, the marriage liscense in his billfold says he's your husband, so we decided to call you." Bulma was angry. "Why'd he do a stupid thing like that?" She asked. "He refused to yeild to some burglar. Then, after the burglar shot him, witness claimed he killed the guy with no weapons or without touching him. They say a light of some kind killed the guy, but we figure the burglar died of natural causes and the witnesses are crazy " Bulma thought Vegeta was an idiot. "His leg is shattered to peices." The doctor said. "He just got out of surgery to get out the bullets and set it straight and give him a blood transfusion. But the weirdest thing happened. His blood was a type of blood we'd never seen before. It's almost like he was a different species!" "Yeah, that'd be the day...woulden't it?" Bulma asked. "What type of blood did you give him? Or did you idiots leave him to die?" The doctor decided to pay no attention to the comment. "Ummm....his blood was closest to type 'o', so that's what we gave him." Bulma wrote down the room number and hospital so she could go gripe at Vegeta for doing something so stupid, then she hung up. "You know what Vegeta did?" She asked Akurei. "What?" Akurei asked. "Hurry. I'm watching TV." Bulma rolled her eyes. "He confronted a burglar and the dumb*ss got shot." Bulma said. He got shot threee times in the leg, so I guess we better see him. The doc said he called Trunks on his cell while he was in the ambulance."So they got up to go, But Bulma was still as mad at Vegeta as ever. (Oh, and through all that, Bulla was staying with ChiChi, okay?)
Trunks went into Vegeta's room. he was laying on the bed, all wrapped up in the hosxpital blanket. "hey Trunks." he said. "They put a cast on so I can't see where they cut me. Stupid B*st*rds." Then, the door swung open on it's hinges, banging against the wall. Bulma, companioned with Kilo and Akurei walked in.
Disclaimer: I d-d-don't o-o-own D-duh-duh-ragonball Z-Z, o-okay? WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------
Trunks was still tired, so he was still sleeping. Goten was playing cards with Charles, even though Charles didn't like Goten because Goten was poor. Goten was winning because he was good at Uno. Since our main Charectar, Trunks, is still sleeping, I don't see any reason to write about him right now. How annoying do you think it would be if someone wrote about YOU if you were sleeping? Well, frankly I'd think that would be pretty d*mn good to have anyone writing about me at all, but....
Vegeta, Bulma and Bulla had gone home from the mall, and Akurei and Kilo had joined them. Akurei was still mad at Kilo for his terrible behaivor at the stupid food court thingy. "That burger costed me an intire 99 cents. What a little brat." Akurei kept whining. "You know how hard it is to get a decent job when you have a french accent. Do you?" He pounded the table. "If....it would be better, maybe I have 4 quarters? That's 100 cents." Vegeta said. He dug 4 quarters out of his pocket. He held them out. "Better?" He asked. Akurei took them with a smile. "Much better." He said. "So how have things been around here?" He asked. "Well, Bulma got kidnapped the other night by a big fat guy." Vegeta said. "So my son, trunks and Kakarot's son, Goten went to find her." Vegeta took a big old bite of applesauce, and it ran all down his face. It came to his attention that Bulla and Kilo were watching something out the window, but he thought nothing of it. He grabbed a napkin and wiped it off. Akurei nodded. "Wish my life was that exiting. I get up, go to my job at the gas station, come home, and sleep." vegeta took another bite. "Dont u single guys ever go to clubs, or anything like that?" Akurei nodded. "Once in a while, I'll getta one night stand." Vegeta and Bulma laughed really hard. "But it never lasts long." Said the depressed Akurei. Veggie and Bulma looked at eachother awkwardly. "Do you think he ever actually GETS one?" Bulma mouthed. Vegeta shook his head with a big old grin. Akurei was staring at his pink placemat. Bulla ran up to Vegeta. "Papa, Papa!" She screamed. Kilo was pulling on Akurei's pants. "Daddy, daddy!" He said. "WHAT?!" The two fathers roared at the same time. Vegeta's was gentler sounding, though. "Can I have a Horsie? There was just a man riding a horsie down the road!" Bulma jumped out of her chair. "No no no no no no no! The answer is NO!" She was gripping Vegeta's arm so hard her fingers were white. "No! Your not going to get her one, are you Vegeta?!" Vegeta looked up at Bulma with a look of someone who is very angry. Then he got up and dragged Bulma into the living room. "What am I supposed to say?" he asked feircly. "Just tell her 'no'? Just like that?" Bulma nodded, her hands on her hips. "You say it to Trunks all the time, but it usually comes out 'NO WAY YOU D*MN LITTLE BRAT'."Vegeta looked at the floor. "But this is different." "HOW is it different?" "Fine." Vegeta said. "YOU tell her so she'll spare me the drama." So they walked back in the kitchen, where Bulma promply told Bulla no, and Bulla threw a fit so she got sent to her room. It had just taken a simple no from Akurei to make Kilo shut up. Vegeta felt very bad, and he wished that the stupid man who rode his stupid horse down the stupid street were dead.
It was time for Vegeta and Bulma to go to sleep, but they coulden't because Bulla was screaming and hollering and pucning the ground as hard she she could. "SHUT UP!" Bulma screamed. her eyes had popped open for the 15th time that night. Vegeta's had never closed because Bulla was so annoying. "We have to do something about this mess." Bulma said, putting a pillow over her ears. "We could send her with Trunks?" Vegeta asked, meaning it to be a joke. "OKAY!" Bulma said. When she learned Vegeta wasn't serious, she was very dissapointed. "What did we do wrong with this d*mn child?" Bulma mumbled. Vegeta thought of all the times Bulma had told Bulla no and he had done her bidding. "Maybe it's because she's a girl." Vegeta said. "Maybe girls are stubborn and mean. Like someone in this room." Bulma groaned, and pounded the pillow into her ears so hard Vegeta thought it would go into her brain. But one night of no sleep was enough for Vegeta. He knew what he had to do.
"So which one won't die?" Vegeta asked the shriveled old lady. He was at a.....Horse Ranch?! What are you thinking, Vegeta? Bulma's going to KILL you! Well,their marriage is none of our buisness. "It will die, eventually. His name is Philocteetee." Vegeta laughed. "What a stupid fag name! Gimme a horse that doesn't sound like a priss! The lady trotted out a beige colored Palimino horse. "His name is Mr. Brown." Vegeta shook his head. "My daughter needs one who isn't boring." She trotted out a solid brown horse. "His name is Caca." She said. "Please do not laugh, but my granchildren named him." vegeta thought. "I like this one better, but lets see more.' He walked down the hall of horsie stalls. He wanted Bulla's horse to be perfect. Vegeta eyed another Palimino cream colored horse in a stall. As soon as it saw Vegeta, it tried to kick his @$$. "I like this one!" Vegeta said. The lady came up. "His name is freakinmeanwaterkappa. But we call him Kappa for short." (Kappa is a japanese water demon in a legend). "Cool!" Vegeta said. "Get im out!" He watched as the lady took him out. he was in chains, and as soon as he was free, he kicked tge lady and her head bashed against a rock. "Kappa likes to lift up his tail and CRAP on desighner rugs." She said with disgust. "Good thing we don't have any." Vegeta said. "Hi there, Kappa." Kappa blew a ball of snot in Vegeta's face. "UGHIO!!!" He screamed. "That was sicky!" He wiped his face with a hankie, that he got from his pocket. "I like this kappa. How much." "(Censored)"*The price was real high* "WHAT THE HOLY HE**?" Vegeta yelled. "That's too much for a horse!" But then he thought about his beauty sleep, and how grouchy Bulma was when she didn't get sleep, so he gave the lady a wad of bills. "So, does he sleep in the garage?" Vegeta asked. "Does he eat.....dog food?" *So, Vegeta went through a long and perilous lesson about what Horses eat and where they sleep.
Vegeta swung open the living room door, holding the horses bridle, which was attached to the freakin horse. "IM HOME!" He yelled. Bulma ran in. "Hi, honey. Whats that u got there?" He stepped into the living room,and the horse followed. "TAH DAHHH!" He said. Bulma's face screwed up. "i told you NO!" She yelled, and Vegeta was caught in a Barrage of painful slaps. "Do you know how much these dumb animals cost?" She was so mad, she thought the horse looked 10 times more handsome than Vegeta right now. And at this moment, she loved the horse 10 times more than Vegeta, too. "Your such a freak!" She ran up the stairs and into their room, and locked the door. Vegeta shrugged. He wanted to show Bulla her present right now. "PRINNNNNCESSSS!!!" He yelled. He heard her trotting down, screaming for a horsie. When she walked into the room, she ran up and hugged the horsie. "Thank you papa thank you papa thank you papa thank you papa...." She went on and on, and Vegeta lead her and Kappa outside and watched her ride him for a while. He thought she was really good for a 7 year old. Then, he figured he outta go up and check on his wife, so he started up the stairs. He didn't hear anything, so he kicked in the door. She wasn't in there, but the window was open. "Funny. I never heard her come out." Vegeta said. There was a note, written on the heart shaped paper tacked to the wall. She often left him notes when she went out shopping, so he wripped it off the wall and read it. She was so mad when she wrote it, her words dug into the paper and ripped. It said, 'Dear Vegeta you troll, your so stupid i told you not to get a horse for her and you obviously dont care what i think so im LEAVING you here all alone! I dont know when or if i'll be back! Toodles!" Vegeta stared at the bottom of the paper. It usually said 'love Bulma' with big old hearts that were out of proportion, but not this time. he crumped the note in his hand. "She'll be back tonight." Vegeta said. "Without me, she has no one to get her jollies with." For that, he thought was what she only cared about. Vegeta went into the living room and dialed Akurei's number. When he picked up, Vegeta laughed into the phone. "Bulma thinks she left me." Vegeta said. "But she'll be back." Akurei cleared his throat. "She's HERE.' Akurei said. "Annoying the hell out of me. If I had a .34 calliber rifle I'd--" Vegeta rolled his eyes and interrupted. "Lemme talk to her." Vegeta said. He heard talking in the background, and he heard Bulma in the background saying 'I DONT WANNA TALK TO THAT SON OF A *BLEEP* WHO DOESN'T EVEN LIKE ME ONE BIT!" God she sounded annoying. "I get the drift." Vegeta said in the phone. "Tell Bulma to take a chill pill." And he hung up the phone. Boy, was he mad. He coulden't beleive she had such nerve.
Trunks hung up the phone, a look of sheer agonizing suprise on his face. "What is it?" Goten asked. "What's wrong? Lemme guess, It's a new enemy." He sighed, and got ready to fly away. "Nope, worse." Trunks said. "My mom and dad are separated. My mom left dad for buying a horse, and she doesn't know if she'll be back. " "Wait wait wait, back up." Goten said. "Bought a horse? Why did he do a stupid thing like that?" Trunks shrugged. "Probley my little sister wanted it." "But......why would ur mom leave ur dad? I thought she loved him, or whatever?" Trunks shrugged. "I guess she's tired of him not doing what she asks. I mean, he NEVER does." Goten nodded. "Trunks....um, do you think she'll come back?" To Goten's suprise, Trunks laughed. "I don't know. She's staying with that single dad, Akurei. Vegeta says that Akurei said they're just friends, but I don't know. That Akurei guy is really good looking, and everything, and I don't know if she will." Then Trunks' eyes got big. "But dad relys on mom for like....everything! Cooking, cleaning....washing his clothes, AND maintaining his precious 'gravity room'." Goten nodded. "Your right! And if she stays gone, the money will run out. Your dad doesn't work." Trunks shook his head. "Mom will send checks to dad, I know she will, because of Bulla." (Did you notice Im just using this paragraph to explain everything thats going on? =))"Okay." Goten said. "But I think mother will come back." Trunks said. "She was probley so angry she wasn't thinking straight."
"Oh, GOD!" Bulma yelled. "he makes me so MAD, going out to buy a horse when I asked him not to!" She was, for the 17th time, explaining to Akurei why she was so mad at Vegeta. "I know, I know." Akurei said. "Can I please, please go to sleep? I'm sooooo tired." Bulma paced back and forth across the kitchen. "I don't know who he thinks he is!" Bulma said. "He has to listen to me SOMETIMES! That's not fair that I have to make his sandwiches, draw his baths, and fix the gravity room! He should have to listen to me!" Akurei looked at the tile on his dirty kitchen floor, and it suprised him when there were no grooves in it from her pacing. "I think your overreating" Akurei said. "He really wanted to talk to you, but you woulden't talk to him." Bulma made a childish sound. "Well, Im going to ignore him for at least a week so he knows what it is like to make me MAD!" Akurei shook his head. "That's stupid." he said. "Your acting like Kilo here." Kilo was playing with a truck in the kitchen floor. The heat between Kilo and Akurei had dissolved. "I am not acting like a 7 year old! Mr. Vegeta can't take care of himself and listen to me at the same time, then we'll see how far he gets." "Okayyy...." Akurei said. "But what if this goes so far and you go back and Vegeta doesn't want you back? What if he finds someone else and you get divorced!" Bulma shrugged. "Of course vegeta will want me back! Nobody else has the patience to waide on him." Akurei nodded. "That's true. And the guys like me who do stuff for themselves never get girls." Bulma hit Akurei in the head. "Stop wallowing in self pity. You wanna wife, buy one on the internet." She ran back to the back of the small apartment.
Vegeta was watching Bulla play outside with the horsie and thinking about things. There was a pack of trunks cigerattes(Vegeta knew Trunks had accidently left them there when he came home to search for Bulma) on the counter. The feeling he had was intense stress, and he knew what cigerattes could do.....They could give you temporary relief, and then you pay for it with your life with lung cancer. (My poor uncle!) Vegeta shrugged. "Im strong enough to beat a stupid old lung cancer." And he popped a cigeratte in his mouth and lit it up. This wasn't his first one. Maybe his seventh, but Bulma didn't know that. The lighter burnt Vegeta's fingers because he was new at this. "Yeow!" He screamed. Then he inhaled, and he sputtered and coughed like a 70 year old with Emphazimia. "Yuck!" He exclaimed. "That's awful!" Vegeta spit out the cigeratte. He had forgotten their terrible taste. He already didn't feel to well, and he didn't want to throw up, so he threw the cigeratte down on the ground and mashed it with his shoe. Then he went into the kitchen, and he grabbed a beer. That was another way he could sometimes forget temporarily all his troubles, getting drunk. He knew how incredibly stupid drinking was, but hey, he was a man and his wife would be gone for a while. He may as well enjoy being the closest thing to single he ever would be again, or at least that's the way Vegeta chose to look at it. Mentally, this whole thing disturbed him. He brought the bottle up and took a long drink. Veggie didn't really like the taste of this stuff that Bulla called 'pee pee water' but it was better than cigerattes, and really cold. So he guzzled the intire thing down, and he was going to have another, but then he remembered he was Bulla's only guardian right now and if he got drunk he might do something really, really stupid. That was Vegeta. So he thought of other ways he could forget what was happening to him. "I know!" He said, out loud. "I'll go train so hard my muscles feel like freakin rubber....then, I'll concentrate on the pain, not the wife leaving me thing." So he went out to the gravity room and trained hard for about 5 hours. When he came out, his muscles were extrememly rubbery and painful. He usually took periodic breaks in between. Vegeta put a towel around his neck because he was sweating like a pig, and took a drink of the soda he always carried out to the gravity chamber. Then he crushed the can and littered it on the front lawn. Breaking laws, even small ones, gave him a since of satisfaction, like it does everyone.
"Did you get the money yet?!" Lutenant Bonerz yelled into his most rebellious student's face. "I SAID, DID YOU GET THE MONEY GET?! trunks wiped spittle off his face. "No, my parents are mean. Like you. Your mean." He was putting on his 'little kid' act. Laughter bursted out, but Charles didn't laugh. "WELL YOU BETTER GET IT OR I'LL WORK THE MONEY OUT OF YOUR SWEAT!" (He meant Trunks was going to do alot of pushups) "NOW YOU DROP DOWN AND GIMME 500!" "12345678910..." Trunks counted as he did 500 pushups in his lightning speed, and jumped back up, not even sweating. "That was easy!" Trunks said. "My dad makes me do 5000 in 300X gravity, you dolt!" Bonerz grabbed Trunks by the neck and shook him all around. Then he remembered that was child abuse and put him down. (HA HA this next part is great because Trunks gets his revenge)Trunks went behind Bonerz. Bonerz thought that trunks was going back to his tent to think about his disrespect. "That's right, soldier!" Bonerz said. "You go back and think about how worthless you are!" Trunks eyed the back of Bonerz, debating on whether to pound him or just give him a black eye, when he saw them. White boxer shorts, sticking out of Bonerz' pants. Trunks did the only thing he could think of.....grabbed the back of them and yanked, half as hard as he could, which was pretty hard. Bonerz thought he was going to be ripped in two! "OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" He screamed, and whirled around. "SOLDIER!" He screamed, and he chased Trunks. Trunks flew up into a tree. "I don't know how you just did that." Bonerz said. "But you come down, right this very instant." Trunks shook his head. "No! I won't!" He spit on Bonerz' head. All the other students in the class were laughing hystericcly. "COME DOWN, MAGGOT!" trunks picked up a fire ant and tossed it on Bonerz. It sank it's pinscers into his arm. "OW!" he screamed. He tossed the ant off and proceeded to try and scale the tree! "OH NO!" trunks said. "If he get's up here, I'm as good as dead!" He climbed higher. Bonerz was on the first branch. second. third. trunks leaped to the next tree. "You stop it right now!" Bonerz said, climbing down and getting on the other tree. trunks kept moving, and Bonerz tried to catch him for a suprising three hours.
"Your not cleaning out your sink right." Bulma grouched. "I do everything myself around here." Akurei said. "I think that I know how to clean a sink!" Bulma grabbed the S.O.S pad from Akurei. "No, you have to SCRUB IT HARD, or the food stuck to the bottom of the sink will get all over the dishes, and then they'll taste and smell bad. And if you put oranges down the drain, it'll smell better." Akurei grinned. This would be okay, having a 17-year housewife to tell him what he'd been doing wrong. "And, I noticed something else that disturbed me. You don't clean your toilet. And when you do, you don't do it good enough!" She conked Akurei on the head with a toilet plunger. "All of you men are helpless." (Bulma's just saying that because she's mad. But without men, she woulden't be here, and if men can make babies, they can't be helpless, can they)She grabbed Akurei's shirt sleeve and drug him into the bathroom. "Now put this toilet plunger down there." "This toilet doesn't flush." Akurei said. "You have to use the other bathroom; this toilet's broke." He didn't move. "That's my whole point." Bulma said. Put it down there. The suction will pull out whatever is stuck." He put the toilet plunger down there, pressed down hard and pulled up. Akurei's ROLEX watch, A Barney the Dinosaur toy, and other things were in there. "See what I mean?" Bulma asked. She put some toilet paper in the toilet and flushed it down. "See how easy it is to fix everyday problems?" Akurei nodded. "Now can you show me how to get rid of those ugly scum rings in the bathtub?" Bulma laughed. "I'm suprised you even know how to MAKE a bath. I have to do it for Vegeta." They both got a good laugh out of that, even though Vegtea was Akurei's best freind. Bulma showed Akurei that Scrubbing Bubbles was the best way. Akurei thought Scrubbing Bubbles were a cheap way to get high, but he'd never tried it. He kept the bottle under the cabinet for emergencies.
Vegeta's muscles hurt really bad. The only thing that ever helped was a bath. But the only problem was that Vegeta didn't know how to draw a bath. He stared at the empty porcelain. It was one of those fancy baths built for husbands and wives, you know the ones with the shelves you can put the candles on? He tried to imagine water inside it. But it didn't work, no suprise. "Maybe it's this thingy." He said to himself. He tapped the shower head. "Hello? Water?" He stepped inside the bathtub and looked into the shower head. His hip hit the botton, and water sprayed all in his face. "*COUGH COUGH* Gosh." Vegeta was spitting out water and stuff. As soon as his hip left the button, the water stopped because he hadn't pushed the button in far enough for it to stay. "More?" Vegeta said. "Only not in my face." But then he realized that this was not the right way to put water in the bath. This was for a SHOWER. He tapped and hit on the other device, the faucet. Then he saw the two nobs underneath it. he sat down in the bath and turned the hot water nob all the way up. "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!" vegeta yelled so loud Bulla heard outside. He was scorched and blistered. He turned the other knob up as far as it would go, too. Now both hot and cold were as high as they could go. "Perfect." Vegeta said.He's wearing shorts, because I don't wanna write about a naked Vegeta. Heck, I dont even wanna imagine a naked Vegeta! The bath water was really smelly though. That's when he noticed an ugly brownish greenish ring around the bath. "EW!" He said. Bits of the nasty substance was coming off in his bath water. "Coulden't you have cleaned before you left?" Vegeta asked. Then he cursed himself. He decided he wanted to call Bulma on her cell and see if she would talk to him. He grabbed his cell phone(Dont ask why he had it by the bath, what a dumb*ss) and dialed the number. It rang and rang. The beep came on for the cell's voice mail. "This is Bulma. Leave me a message and I'll get back to you if your worth it. Leave your message after the annoying beep." Vegeta took a deep breath. "Its Vegeta. Pick up." he said. Nothing. "I know your there. Pick up the phone right now." Still nothing. "I managed to make a bath for myself." Vegeta said. Bulma picked up the phone. "Really? YOU!" She was laughing hard. "That's enough." Vegeta said. "I needa know how to get rid of soap scum rings in the bath, okay?" Bulma was silent for a while. "Im trying to decide if I should tell you. Making your first bath AND cleaning it is a little much for you." Vegeta was sad. "Why do you have to be such a B*tch? I just called to say hello and this is the thanks that I get." "Maybe I didn't WANT you to say hello right now." Vegeta sighed. "What can I do to make you happy at me again?" "You figure it out, Poindexter!" Bulma said. "Buh bye!" She hung up on poor Vegeta. He was really sad. But knew what he must do. He would ask Trunks what to get her, and shower her with gifts. Then maybe, she'd come back and cook for him. It made Vegeta hungry just thinking about it, but he didn't know how to make anything.
*RING RING* "You don't answer that Cell Phone, Soldier!" Bonerz spat into trunks' face. "Your not even supposed to have Cell Phones in the physical punishment room!" Trunks decided to make up a herrendous lie. "Well, My mother is.....she has problems with her....her hips, and sometimes she falls, and she lives all alone....so sometimes she needs someone she can call to send paramedics after her." Bonerz raised a brow. "I met your mother AND your father. They seemed perfectly happy together, wcich means they must live together, and your mother's hips looked fine." trunks tried to think of another lie to cover up his first one. "Well, dad is away on a buisness trip in the Himalayas, and my mothers hips only act up on some days. She called me this morning and told me today was a bad day." Trunks smiled because he had managed to fool Bonerz. He could see it in his face. "So can I take this call?" trunks asked. But quickly, he added, "Actually, I don't care what you say, Im taking it anyway." He stepped out of the Physical Punishment room and flipped open the phone. He had seen on the caller ID that it was from his dad's cell phone. "What is it, Dad?" He asked. vegeta noted that he sounded realived. "Is it important? I hope so, so you can keep me out longer.....Im in the physical punsihment room....may I tell you how much I dispise you for sending me here?" Vegeta cleared his throat. "Son, Im not even going to ask you what you did to land yourself in Physical Punsishment this time, or what your doing in there, but I am going to ask you something important." Trunks wondered what it could be. "As you know, me and your mother.....are separated at the moment, due to reasons beyond my will." trunks was suprised because he had always thought that if they sepearated, Vegeta would be the one to leave because he was such a jerk. "And I want to shower Bulma with gifts so that maybe she will come back and fix me a lunch." What a selfish reason. Trunks thought, and he said into the phone, "So you want me to tell you what to get her?" "yes." Vegeta responded. A blowdryer was running in the background, so Trunks figured that Vegeta had just been in the bath. "I don't know." Trunks said. "I've never really gotten a girl anything...not even my girlfriends." Vegeta thought about Gohan's daughter, Pan, and Rememered trunks had gotten her something on her bithday. "I just call them every day on the phone, and that seems to be enough." "What about that time she had a birthday?" Vegeta asked. "I rememer you spent most of your allowance savings on a present for her. What was it again?" trunks was embarrased. "It was......a new stereo and a whole bunch of CDs." he said. "But mother woulden't like those because she's not young and hip. But whatever you do, don't tell her that you want her to come home and make you a lunch." Vegeta heard a raw voice in the background, calling trunks' name. "Gotta go, dad. Seeya." Trunks clicked the cell phone closed and stepped into the Physical punishment room. "Bout time you got back, soldier. Now, I want you to do 100 chin-ups on the bar. NOW!" Trunks ran over, and he grabbed the Chin Ups bar. He lifted himself up 100 times, his chin going over the bar, in about 3 minutes. He was running on slow today because he had just been chased for 3 hours by Bonerz.
"Could I have a sandwich?" Akurei asked. "I'm really hungry, and I'm tired from all that training." Bulma got up, and sloppily fixed him a sandwich. "Merci." Akurei said. (French for 'thank you' or 'please')He grabbed it and began eating. "I wonder what Vegeta will choose to do for me." Bulma said. "Maybe he will get us tickets on a boat cruise, or to the Carribean!" Akurei looked at her. "Your dreaming." He said. "After all you put him through, you really think he'll get boat tickets? I don't know if he even wants you back, for Christ's sake." Bulma's eyes got wide, and her mouth opened into a big old 'o'. "Of course he does! What would he do without me? I cook his food, and I clean his gravity chamber." Akurei shrugged. Kilo suddenly ran up. "Daddy! Daddy's friend's wife!" he was running around Bulma's legs. "What is it?" Akurei asked. "What in the name of god is so exiting?!" Kilo jumped into Akurei's lap. "They're having a special at Putt Putt golf! Tickets are only $5.95, but only today! We gotta go, please please please?" "Wellll." Akurei said, going to say no because he was tired, "Sure, fine. We'll go!" Bulma ran into the kitchen. "I'll make water bottles and sandwiches!" Akurei rolled his eyes. He was awfully tired of having Bulma around. She was a neat freak sometimes, and she was VERY beyond all purpose annoying. Then he got an idea. "I know!" He said to himself so Bulma coulden't hear, "I'll tell Vegeta to meet us there, and neither one will know the other one is there!" He raced to the old fasioned phone on the wall and dialed Vegeta's number. "Vegeta! Vegeta!" He said as soon as it was picked up. "I've got something to invite you to...I want you to come to Putt Putt golf with me an Kilo. Bring Bulla, too." Akurei saw Bulla as a way to get Vegeta and Bulma back togather. He had a plan to tell her to do. Vegeta was silent for a moment. "Isn't Bulma staying with you? I won't come if she's going to be there because she will make fun of me." Akurei made up something, not knowing how mad it would make Vegeta. "NO!" Akurei said. "She's staying with....um.....Yamcha!" Vegeta's blood began to boil, and he got more angry that he'd ever been. He screamed so loud Akurei's ear was going to fall off, "NO WAY! NOT HIM! ANYONE BUT HIM! GOSH IM GOING TO SMASH HIM IM GOING OVER THERE RIGHT NOW AND SHOW HIM WHOS BOSS GOSH!" Akurei knew Vegeta was dangerously close to dropping the phone and running to Yamcha's to kill him. Akurei had forgotten that Bulma and Yamcha were X-boyfriend/girlfriend and they had almost gotten married, but then Bulma met Vegeta and Blah blah blah, you all know the story by now. Vegeta was really funny about Bulma hanging out around Yamcha. "NO!" Akurei said. "Dont go over there yet......After Putt Putt we can both get revenge on....Yamcha." Akurei thought that Vegeta would stop wanting to smash Yamcha if he saw that Bulma was not really staying with him. But he was wrong.(Oooohh.. can you predict what's going to happen to Yamcha......for no reason at all? I can, and it won't be pretty....poor Yamcha! He's one of my favorites!)
Vegeta showed up at Putt Putt with Bulla to meet Akurei and Kilo. They were already here, as Vegeta could see. The car was parked in the driveway. He wondered why they hadn't capsuled it. Probley to show off the new car they had gotten for cheap from the Capsule Corp. "Papa, where's Kilo and Kilo's daddy?" "They're already inside the park, Princess." "Well then, where's Mommy?" Vegeta's breath caught in his throat. Should I tell her? He thought. He decided on not. "Um, Bulla, Mommy is staying at a freinds house for a while, she won't be back for.....i don't know when." He was hoping Bulla woulden't ask anymore questions, and his prayers were answered. Thank Supreme Kai! Vegeta noticed Kilo and Akurei as he entered the park. What he didn't notice was the very slim, blue haired pretty lady buiying cokes at the snack stand with her back to them. "Hey, buddy." Akurei said. Bulla and Kilo wandered off to play mini golf. "Let's play some golf." Vegeta said. "I bet I can beat you!" Akurei stood still. "What, are you waiting for somebody?" Vegeta asked. "If so, who? If it's Yamcha, I'll-" Just then, the pretty, slim lady turned around. Bulma saw Vegeta and Vegeta saw Bulma at the same instant. Akurei realized this. Their eyes locked on eachothers for a while, then Bulma turned away. She looked furious. She stomped toward Akurei. "WHAT IS HE DOING HERE?!" She spat in his face. "I um....I um....I thought she was staying with Yamcha?" Vegeta said. "Yamcha?" Bulma asked. "Why would I stay with a dumb*ss like him! See what low expectations Vegeta has for me?!" She started punching blindly at her husband. He caught her wrists in his hands and said, "You set us up, didn't you?!" Akurei whispered something in French and turned his head. "WHAT?!" Vegeta asked. "So we can hear you, NOW!" Bulma was still struggling in Vegeta's iron grip, and he thought it was pretty funny. "I said 'Oui'(Pronounced 'wee'), the french word for....Yes." Vegeta growled. "Why did you do this? You know she doesn't want to see me!" Bulma's fingernail drove itself painfully in one of Vegeta's hands that was holding her wrists. He let go on reflex and she slapped him right across the face. A large red mark was left. "First you think I cheated on you because you think I was a whore, then u come here because you saw his car! Your stalking me, I know you are...." She went on and on. "SHUT THE H*LL UP!" Akurei said. "He came here because I told him to. He didn't have any idea you were hear. He thought you were staying with Yamcha because I told him you were, because Im tired of you guys fighting, and frankly Bulma, Im tired of you living in my house!" Bulma's eyes teared up. "You don't like me living with you?" Akurei shook his head. "Not one bit." Bulma's face got mad again. "Well that doesn't change the fact that he--" Akurei shoved Bulma and Vegeta both in a roller coster cart(Sometimes they have little carnival things at Putt Putt) and pushed down the bar. It locked so they couldent move. They were stuck side by side on a roller coaster! Bulma struggled. "Let me out!" She screamed. "Right now! Right now!" Vegeta clapped a hand over her mouth. "Kai! Do you ever shut up? It's locked, so you might as well sit back and enjoy the ride." Bulma recognized that as the exact same line Vegeta had said to her on their honeymoon nite. That P*ssed her off even more than before. And she hated roller coasters. Akurei hoped this would help them like eachother again. He watched as the roller coaster started up. Vegeta liked it pretty well, because he was used to flying in circles and loops. So it was nothing new to him. But you coulden't tell by looking at his face. Bulma was screaming and yelling and on occasion she would slap Vegeta in the face. Once he grabbed her wrist and said something in her face. Akurei thought it was a threat. Then he wrenched her wrist backwards so she screamed, than turned the other way. When it ended, Vegeta had his arms crossed and a sour look on his face. "I want to go home." He said. "Go ahead!" Bulma said. "It'd make MY DAY much happier!" Vegeta was so mad he wanted to blow off her head. But he didn't. "You do realize that I could destroy you at any minute, right?" Vegeta said. He lit up a powerball. "With this little ball, I could destroy u! You'd be dead before you hit the freakin ground!" Bulma wasn't even scared. "Ha! You'd never hurt me because you love me too much!" "Wanna bet your LIFE on it?" he said. He shot the powerball so close to her face she could feel the heat of it. It flew into a tree. "Um....vegeta...." Akurei said. Vegeta ignored him. "I could scratch your eyes out!" Bulma said, making her fingers with really long fingernails into hooks. She looked like an idiot. "No, you love ME too much." Vegeta said. Bulma swiped at Vegeta's face. Not as close as he had shot the powerball, though. About 2 inches away from his face. You could tell she was trying to make sure she didn't hit him. "Vegeta!" Akurei said, more urgently. Vegeta ignored him further. "Your really mean!" Bulma said. "Your really bossy!" Vegeta said. "Your really stupid!" Bulma said. "Your really.....really....freakish!" Bulma bursted out laughing at the insult. "Freakish?" She said. "When did you think of that one?" "Vegeta!!!" Akurei said. Vegeta ignored him. "VEGETA YAMCHA'S HERE!!" Akurei said. Yamcha was walking toward them. "Hi Gu--" Yamcha was punched into a tree so hard 3 teeth flew out. A large bruise appeared. Bulma stood back and watched. You could tell she really wanted to cheer for Vegeta. "What was that for?" Yamcha asked. Vegeta drop- kicked him in the stomach, and he flew clear over the golf feilds. Then, vegeta took to the air and went after the flying Yamcha. Bulma got on Akurei's back and they flew over to watch. Yamcha was getting the beating of his life. Vegeta was punching him in the face and stomach. Blood flew out of his mouth and nose, and ears as well. He still hand't lost consience. Vegeta applied a swift kick to Yamcha's ribs, breaking three of them. Yamcha then lost concience. Vegeta drop kicked Yamcha into a nearby hospital. "JUST A REMINDER!" Vegeta screamed after him. "YOU HAVE TO MOW MY LAWN EVERY TEUSDAY FOR NO PAY!" Yamcha had never heard of that before.
Vegeta, the next day, was at a jewelry store. he was going to get a present for Bulma. "She already has an engagement ring and a wedding ring." Vegeta said. "So it can't be a ring. It has to be a necklace." He was talking to the clerk. The clerk showed him all the different necklaces he could get with real diamonds in them. "I don't think I like any of these." He said, even though Bulma had been looking at them a week ago and wanted them all,"I think I'll get her something else." He was turning to go out, when a strange charectar stepped in the door. He pulled out a gun. "This is a stick up!" He said. Nobody move!" Vegeta continued walking. "I don't have time for this." He said. "Outta my way." Then Vegeta realized what the guy was doing. "Hey!" He said. He charged up a powerball. The man was terrified at this...'light thingy' growing out of Vegeta's hand, so he shot 3 times. They all hit Vegeta in the left leg and he pitched to the ground with his leg shattered. Vegeta screamed and powered up, then he shot a series of Gologan Fires at the Burglar, killing him as soon as the first one hit. "That stupid F*ck*r!" Vegeta roared. "He shot my leg! He HURT my leg!" He tried to pick up his leg so he could examine the damage in his leg and spandex, but his leg woulden't respond. The clerk was on the phone with an ambulance. Vegeta wondered why. "My leg's just a littler hurt." He said. His voice came out croaky. "Get off that phone, fat baldy." The man kept talking. Vegeta lifted up his head and looked at him leg. Ity was in a strange 'z' shape and was bleeding everywhere. He almost swooned and fainted, but he didn't.
"I need out of here for one day." Trunks said to Bonerz. he was on one knee. Bonerz was amused that Trunks was kneeling to him for something. "Why would I do that for you?" Bonerz asked. "Your parents didn't pay the fee for days off." "That's the thing!" Trunks said. "My dad broke his leg, he's in the hospital and I WANT OUT!" he was so angry he considered blowing off Bonerz' head. "I'll pay the fee." trunks said. "I got money!" Bonerz was suprised at the amount of money the kid pulled out. 3 thousand. "You still haven't paid for the damages you caused on the school grounds." Bonerz said. "You can't pay me when you owe already. Plus--the parents have to pay it." Trunks sighed. "I'll pay you....double." The fee was 50 dollars. He pulled out a hundred. Bonerz looked faintly interested, but shook his head. "I'll pay.....triple." He looked even more interested, but shook his head. "I'll pay you........quadroople!" Bonerz nodded and grabbed the money from Trunks. He put the fee in the fee basket and took the extra for himself, shoving it in his pocket. "Deal." he said. Trunks began to fly up into the air, going to blast out of a window. Bonerz got up off his swiveling chair. He pointed a shaking finger at Trunks. "Just what are you?" He said. "You can....fly? Your weird! A freak of nature! Stay away from me!!!" Trunks lowered. "Ooppsss...I forgot I'm not supposed to fly in front of people. Sorry I have to do this..." He grabbed a candle holder and bashed Bonerz in the head to knock him out. "Hopefully you won't remember anything." Trunks said. "Or hopefully the police will think you were going nuts." And Trunks decided to use the door so the story woulden't match up.
"Get me out of here!" Vegeta said, struggling in a stretcher as they wheeled him into the emergency room. "I'm fine! I can fly to get around!" "He's obviously delerious!" The doctor shouted. "Get me some Morphine before we take him into surgery!" Vegeta was bewildered. "What? I don't need surgery! I'm fine! Just let me go beat the Sh*t out of those robbers that shot me!" A nurse was sopping up blood that was coming out of Vegeta's leg. Vegeta kicked and she flew into a wall, and pain exploded through his leg. "OWCH!" He screamed. He looked at his leg. The bullet holes were more visible now that there wasn't as much blood because she sopped it up. "We'll need a blood transfusion." The doctor said. "I need to know what type of blood he takes." A nurse stuck a long needle into the vein in the crook of Vegeta's elbow. "OW!" Vegeta said. He slapped at the needle, but when the doctors tried to hold him down, he let them. The nurse, after getting blood, ran into a testing room with the needle vile full of it. They wheeled Vegeta into an operating room. "We're going to put you to sleep with some gas so you won't feel anything." The doctor said. They tried to put a big ugly mask on his face. "Get that off of me! I--" They shoved it over his face so his voice was muffled. They flipped a switch and some sort of smelly gas started coming into the mask. "Count backward from 100." The doctor said. "By the time you get to 95, you'll be asleep."
* * *
"54321....0. I'm at zero. I thought you said I'd be asleep at 95." The doctor had an openmouthed glare. "This man won't go to sleep! His nervous system is amazing!" He put the gas on high. "Sir, if you don't go to sleep soon, we'll have to cut you while your awake with nothing but anesteshia!" Vegeta shrugged. He was getting a little woozy from the higher gas, but nothing special. "Is that the best you got?" Vegeta said. He didn't want to be cut while he was awake. A nurse shoved a long needle into his skin. It was filled with some fluid that would make him sleep. Then, his eyes grew heavy and he FINALLY went to sleep.
"What?!" Bulma screamed into the phone. "What in the hell? You say Vegeta got shot in the leg three times?" She was talking to a doctor on the phone. "Yes, the marriage liscense in his billfold says he's your husband, so we decided to call you." Bulma was angry. "Why'd he do a stupid thing like that?" She asked. "He refused to yeild to some burglar. Then, after the burglar shot him, witness claimed he killed the guy with no weapons or without touching him. They say a light of some kind killed the guy, but we figure the burglar died of natural causes and the witnesses are crazy " Bulma thought Vegeta was an idiot. "His leg is shattered to peices." The doctor said. "He just got out of surgery to get out the bullets and set it straight and give him a blood transfusion. But the weirdest thing happened. His blood was a type of blood we'd never seen before. It's almost like he was a different species!" "Yeah, that'd be the day...woulden't it?" Bulma asked. "What type of blood did you give him? Or did you idiots leave him to die?" The doctor decided to pay no attention to the comment. "Ummm....his blood was closest to type 'o', so that's what we gave him." Bulma wrote down the room number and hospital so she could go gripe at Vegeta for doing something so stupid, then she hung up. "You know what Vegeta did?" She asked Akurei. "What?" Akurei asked. "Hurry. I'm watching TV." Bulma rolled her eyes. "He confronted a burglar and the dumb*ss got shot." Bulma said. He got shot threee times in the leg, so I guess we better see him. The doc said he called Trunks on his cell while he was in the ambulance."So they got up to go, But Bulma was still as mad at Vegeta as ever. (Oh, and through all that, Bulla was staying with ChiChi, okay?)
Trunks went into Vegeta's room. he was laying on the bed, all wrapped up in the hosxpital blanket. "hey Trunks." he said. "They put a cast on so I can't see where they cut me. Stupid B*st*rds." Then, the door swung open on it's hinges, banging against the wall. Bulma, companioned with Kilo and Akurei walked in.
