Authors note: Sorry its been a while just I'm in the middle of exams and there's been a serious lack of inspiration. this chap is just Buffy's POV and I think you Spike fans might be a little happier with this chap. Don't worry B/A supporters I wudnt touch their relationship!! Neway this is my own formation of bits from S7 of Buff and S4 of Angel.

Here goes..

Chap 17

'I won't be long'

Whatever.

'I'm coming back'

Again, whatever.

Months had passed since Angel had left my side and already the thought of his name made me feel sick. Yeah, I still talk to him from time to time on the telephone but that's usually interrupted by "Oh gotta go, Fred's got herself in a tangle with another vampire."

Grr.

And the latest phone call really took the biscuit.

"Oh my god Buffy you should see her, she's completely amazing. She is so beautiful, her eyes shine like diamonds. Buffy she makes me complete. Jasmine. Jasmine, Jasmine, Jasmine."

WHAT THE FUCK?! Excuse me one moment while I hurl into this bucket.

Complete? Makes him complete? I thought I did that?! Clearly not, from this fucking phone call that I received. By the way that was two weeks ago.

There's a knock at my door. I open it slowly and smile at the person stood behind it. "Hey there."

He scratches his head and looks down at his feet sheepishly. He has changed. Changed in more ways than I could ever imagine a vamp - Man could.

Firstly though an update.

Spike. He left that dreaded night with Angel at his side, I knew they would fight and one of them would come crawling back to Sunnydale but it shocked me when I saw that it was Spike. Not only had he returned to Sunnydale but also he had been to Africa and gained what he reckons is a soul.

Wow. Now that shocked the hell out of me.

I remember the night. It was pouring with rain and I hurried to make my way back to the house out of the storm. I hit him full on in the chest and fell back in the dirt. His body towered over mine as the rain made little paths down his face, lightening forked in the dark sky behind him.

He looked at me blankly but suddenly light burned in his eyes and he stepped back, his hand held over his mouth as he muttered aimlessly to himself.

"Spike?" I got up off the muddy floor and tried to comprehend what was happening to him.

"No, no, no, no, no, no" He continued to mutter.

"Are you ok?" Well duh, now that was a stupid question.

"I hurt you." I just about managed to decipher what he was saying amongst the insane context of his mumbled sentences.

"What?" I reach out to him to stop him walking backwards but he flinches when my hand makes contact with his.

His eyes turn softer and the glazed look fade for a second as he reaches out to touch my face. His hand is just moments away from touching my skin and I can hear him muttering "beautiful" over and over again. Then his eyes glaze over and he curls his hand into a ball before it even makes contact.

I look at him confused.

The rain continues to pour yet I stand patiently, nothing tells me to turn away in disgust or even in fear of Spike. Something inside tells me to stay and hear out what he has to say.

That is if he decides to form a coherent sentence.

"Angel-he should've warned me."

"What?" Angel, what was up with Angel, is he ok?

"He makes a good show of forgetting, but it's here, in me, all the time."

"Spike, what is in you?" Now if I was in the mood to be funny, I would have had a good sexual innuendo going on with that sentence.

"The spark. I wanted to give you what you deserve, and I got it. They put the spark in me and now all it does is burn." He finishes his sentence and I can sense his fear. His body starts to shake as he bursts into uncontrollable sobs.

By now my head was buzzing. "You have a soul? How?"

The glaze disappears once more and he steps closer to me. "You wanted it right? You wanted me to have this spark burning brightly inside me like Angels?"

"No spike - "

"Well that's what I did, I went in search of something you deserved and look what I landed with. A bloody soul. Now that's an achievement." He looks at me once more before the babble starts again.

"So much hurt, blood pouring out of everything, the stars shine brightly but Ah ha! Not as brightly as me!" He looks down at his chest and smiles stupidly.

So that's the update on Spike. As for me, well what can I say? It's been a bitch of a month.

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