A/N*I've taken a couple of liberties with the script by making Lily an
Animagi
Disclaimer: Yes, I do own Harry Potter and Crew, they sleep under my bed and I feed them table scraps. Unless you're serious about suing me in which case I claim nothing but the plot. And Oliver.
"What do you mean, 'how do we do this?'"
"Well really people, I can't just strut onto the pitch, say Hi I'm Harry Potter, I've returned practically from the dead and are we going to start playing or what? It's not that easy."
"No its not-Sirius what on Earth are you doing?" Sirius was gnawing on his arm in an extremely dog-like fashion and it had caught the attention of everyone at the table.
"Fleas."
"Ewww! Uncle Sirius!"
"You try living in the Forbidden Forest and not attracting fleas."
"Why were you in the Forbidden Forest?"
"The last of The Dark Army fled into the Forest after the war. I've been trying to clear them out."
"Well at least you became flea infested while doing something noble." Harry said dryly.
"Can we get back on topic?"
"Right, Harry, just tell everyone the truth. That'll be easy enough."
"You know it isn't that easy. People were upset enough when I left, when they find out WHY I left. You know nobody ever liked Susan, thought I should have ended up with 'Mione."
"I thought you should have ended up with Hermione too." Ron said.
"I love you too sweetheart." Hermione said coldly.
"You know what I mean."
"Anyway, they'll probably dig the poor woman up and kill her all over again." Harry said.
"Nobody likes the person who steals their hero." Lavender said wisely.
Harry looked suddenly at his daughter. "And what of Elisabeth? Children will taunt her. I wouldn't doubt if she'll get Howlers."
"Harry, she'll be every bit as popular as you ever were."
"I recall Harry only ever had two friends."
"Hey! What about Neville? What about Seamus and Dean? What about you and George? And Oliver?"
"What about us mate?" Oliver asked cheerfully.
Harry glared and kicked Oliver under the table.
"You look like a hedgehog when you frown." George observed.
Harry lunged out over the table and was stopped short by Remus. "Now, now children."
"S'all in good fun." Said George laughing.
"Children? What of children? I have a child myself thank you very much."
"And you were a child when you had her." Sirius muttered, then in a louder voice, "You'll be forgetting that I changed your nappies will you?"
"Ah shut up you old dog." Elisabeth gasped at the language but Sirius only laughed.
"You may be a son of a stag but you're definitely no more than Bambi." Most of the table roared with laughter but Elisabeth was relieved to see that the other children were as confused as she.
"Son of a bird too," Remus said smiling, "no wonder you're a chirpy thing."
"What are you talking about?" Will asked.
"Doesn't matter, we wouldn't want to give the gods feet of crumbled clay."
"GENTLEMEN! Back on topic. Please!"
"Do you have any suggestions if you're so smart?"
"Yes, Harry can go back and say he wanted his child raised in the same environment he was raised in-"
"ARRRGGGHHH!!! I may have been young, and I may have been screwed up by war but honestly woman! In the same environment as I was raised in? Bloody hell!"
"You know what I mean Harry." Hermione said, exasperated. "Tell them that the magical world held more power when you did not grow up in it. Tell them you wanted Elisabeth away from the fame."
"Better yet tell them you wanted her to grow up away from us." Ron said, still smarting from when his wife yelled at him.
"That would work. But where am I going to live?"
"EDINB URGH!" came the reply in a chorus of voices.
"For chrisake Potter, we didn't come all the way over here so you would move to St. Petersburg."
"St. Petersburg eh? I hear it's pretty over there."
"HARRY!"
Harry grinned, "Alright, alright. 'Lisbeth, do you think you can handle moving away from your friends?"
"What friends?" Elisabeth asked sourly.
"Right, well. When are you guys taking the kids to Diagon?"
"Next Thursday, we're meeting Malfoy and his daughter, she's starting second year."
"They proved it was his eh?"
"No, Malfoy just felt sorry for the kid, what with Pansy for a mother and nobody really wanting her. As a matter of fact they proved it wasn't his but with his new kind, nobleness he kept her anyway."
"Who was the father?"
"Crabbe."
Harry twisted his face up and shook his head. "Poor kid, what did she end up looking like? Or is she invisible, a figment of someone's imagination. We all know Crabbe can't get it up."
Ron snorted and Fred spewed tea across the table.
"No, we can see HER perfectly fine." Hermione said sourly.
"Aww, relax Hermione," Harry said, pulling the woman onto his lap and hugging her, "We don't mean any harm. Will you stay to help us pack?"
This seemed to visibly brighten Hermione but Ron was different story.
"What am I supposed to do without my wife for a week?"
"Mas---"
"The children." Hermione said severely.
"Sorry babe." Harry said sheepishly.
Hermione smiled and shook her head. "Of course I'll help you pack. And you can stay with us until you find a place."
"When can you start work Potter?
"Oh really Oliver-"
"As soon as I find a place. What kind of brooms are out there?"
"You've gotta have a FeatherFlame3000 there isn't anything better."
"I've still got the old Firebolt in my vault at Gringotts. I have my wand and schoolbooks and everything in there."
"I remember that Firebolt." Oliver said smiling, "I also remember the strip McGonagall tore off me when you got it."
"I'll tell you when it's ready Wood." Harry said, in high-pitched imitation of McGonagall. Elisabeth wondered vaguely if it was the same McGonagall who was Headmistress at Hogwarts.
"Harry glanced at his watch. "You kids should be off to bed."
"It's ten in the morning!" Daniel said, yawning.
Hermione gave them one of those mother looks that you can't master until you've become a mother.
Elisabeth tried again; "You guys are staying up."
"One day, grasshopper, you will be able to stay up past ten thirty a.m. too." Harry replied.
There was a knock on the door, "Come in!" Harry yelled.
The door opened and Rosco stepped in, "To lazy to open the door yours-"
He had finally realised that there were several other people at the table and they were staring at him in the same unflattering way as he was staring at them.
He looked at Harry; "Old school friends Ross, dropped in to visit."
"I thought you went to an all boys school?"
"These are their wives." He gestured at Lavender and Hermione, sitting on his lap.
Rosco raised an eyebrow. "Well, I'd better be off then, wouldn't want to intrude." "Er-right, hey Ross! I'm moving to Edinbrough."
"What? You can't just, just, just up and move!" he blustered
"Actually."
"You sleep on this Potter, sleep on it, I'll talk to you later." He nodded to the guests and left.
'You always did sugar coat things Harry." Remus said.
"Yep, that's old Harry, never knew what he was hinting at."
"Oh shut up." Neville clapped him warmly on the back.
"Come on you little ones, bed time."
There was the necessary grumbling but they were tired and wanted (very deep down, so deep they wouldn't admit it if you asked them) to go to bed.
Elisabeth went up to her bed and fell asleep marveling at the closeness of the ten adults downstairs.
Disclaimer: Yes, I do own Harry Potter and Crew, they sleep under my bed and I feed them table scraps. Unless you're serious about suing me in which case I claim nothing but the plot. And Oliver.
"What do you mean, 'how do we do this?'"
"Well really people, I can't just strut onto the pitch, say Hi I'm Harry Potter, I've returned practically from the dead and are we going to start playing or what? It's not that easy."
"No its not-Sirius what on Earth are you doing?" Sirius was gnawing on his arm in an extremely dog-like fashion and it had caught the attention of everyone at the table.
"Fleas."
"Ewww! Uncle Sirius!"
"You try living in the Forbidden Forest and not attracting fleas."
"Why were you in the Forbidden Forest?"
"The last of The Dark Army fled into the Forest after the war. I've been trying to clear them out."
"Well at least you became flea infested while doing something noble." Harry said dryly.
"Can we get back on topic?"
"Right, Harry, just tell everyone the truth. That'll be easy enough."
"You know it isn't that easy. People were upset enough when I left, when they find out WHY I left. You know nobody ever liked Susan, thought I should have ended up with 'Mione."
"I thought you should have ended up with Hermione too." Ron said.
"I love you too sweetheart." Hermione said coldly.
"You know what I mean."
"Anyway, they'll probably dig the poor woman up and kill her all over again." Harry said.
"Nobody likes the person who steals their hero." Lavender said wisely.
Harry looked suddenly at his daughter. "And what of Elisabeth? Children will taunt her. I wouldn't doubt if she'll get Howlers."
"Harry, she'll be every bit as popular as you ever were."
"I recall Harry only ever had two friends."
"Hey! What about Neville? What about Seamus and Dean? What about you and George? And Oliver?"
"What about us mate?" Oliver asked cheerfully.
Harry glared and kicked Oliver under the table.
"You look like a hedgehog when you frown." George observed.
Harry lunged out over the table and was stopped short by Remus. "Now, now children."
"S'all in good fun." Said George laughing.
"Children? What of children? I have a child myself thank you very much."
"And you were a child when you had her." Sirius muttered, then in a louder voice, "You'll be forgetting that I changed your nappies will you?"
"Ah shut up you old dog." Elisabeth gasped at the language but Sirius only laughed.
"You may be a son of a stag but you're definitely no more than Bambi." Most of the table roared with laughter but Elisabeth was relieved to see that the other children were as confused as she.
"Son of a bird too," Remus said smiling, "no wonder you're a chirpy thing."
"What are you talking about?" Will asked.
"Doesn't matter, we wouldn't want to give the gods feet of crumbled clay."
"GENTLEMEN! Back on topic. Please!"
"Do you have any suggestions if you're so smart?"
"Yes, Harry can go back and say he wanted his child raised in the same environment he was raised in-"
"ARRRGGGHHH!!! I may have been young, and I may have been screwed up by war but honestly woman! In the same environment as I was raised in? Bloody hell!"
"You know what I mean Harry." Hermione said, exasperated. "Tell them that the magical world held more power when you did not grow up in it. Tell them you wanted Elisabeth away from the fame."
"Better yet tell them you wanted her to grow up away from us." Ron said, still smarting from when his wife yelled at him.
"That would work. But where am I going to live?"
"EDINB URGH!" came the reply in a chorus of voices.
"For chrisake Potter, we didn't come all the way over here so you would move to St. Petersburg."
"St. Petersburg eh? I hear it's pretty over there."
"HARRY!"
Harry grinned, "Alright, alright. 'Lisbeth, do you think you can handle moving away from your friends?"
"What friends?" Elisabeth asked sourly.
"Right, well. When are you guys taking the kids to Diagon?"
"Next Thursday, we're meeting Malfoy and his daughter, she's starting second year."
"They proved it was his eh?"
"No, Malfoy just felt sorry for the kid, what with Pansy for a mother and nobody really wanting her. As a matter of fact they proved it wasn't his but with his new kind, nobleness he kept her anyway."
"Who was the father?"
"Crabbe."
Harry twisted his face up and shook his head. "Poor kid, what did she end up looking like? Or is she invisible, a figment of someone's imagination. We all know Crabbe can't get it up."
Ron snorted and Fred spewed tea across the table.
"No, we can see HER perfectly fine." Hermione said sourly.
"Aww, relax Hermione," Harry said, pulling the woman onto his lap and hugging her, "We don't mean any harm. Will you stay to help us pack?"
This seemed to visibly brighten Hermione but Ron was different story.
"What am I supposed to do without my wife for a week?"
"Mas---"
"The children." Hermione said severely.
"Sorry babe." Harry said sheepishly.
Hermione smiled and shook her head. "Of course I'll help you pack. And you can stay with us until you find a place."
"When can you start work Potter?
"Oh really Oliver-"
"As soon as I find a place. What kind of brooms are out there?"
"You've gotta have a FeatherFlame3000 there isn't anything better."
"I've still got the old Firebolt in my vault at Gringotts. I have my wand and schoolbooks and everything in there."
"I remember that Firebolt." Oliver said smiling, "I also remember the strip McGonagall tore off me when you got it."
"I'll tell you when it's ready Wood." Harry said, in high-pitched imitation of McGonagall. Elisabeth wondered vaguely if it was the same McGonagall who was Headmistress at Hogwarts.
"Harry glanced at his watch. "You kids should be off to bed."
"It's ten in the morning!" Daniel said, yawning.
Hermione gave them one of those mother looks that you can't master until you've become a mother.
Elisabeth tried again; "You guys are staying up."
"One day, grasshopper, you will be able to stay up past ten thirty a.m. too." Harry replied.
There was a knock on the door, "Come in!" Harry yelled.
The door opened and Rosco stepped in, "To lazy to open the door yours-"
He had finally realised that there were several other people at the table and they were staring at him in the same unflattering way as he was staring at them.
He looked at Harry; "Old school friends Ross, dropped in to visit."
"I thought you went to an all boys school?"
"These are their wives." He gestured at Lavender and Hermione, sitting on his lap.
Rosco raised an eyebrow. "Well, I'd better be off then, wouldn't want to intrude." "Er-right, hey Ross! I'm moving to Edinbrough."
"What? You can't just, just, just up and move!" he blustered
"Actually."
"You sleep on this Potter, sleep on it, I'll talk to you later." He nodded to the guests and left.
'You always did sugar coat things Harry." Remus said.
"Yep, that's old Harry, never knew what he was hinting at."
"Oh shut up." Neville clapped him warmly on the back.
"Come on you little ones, bed time."
There was the necessary grumbling but they were tired and wanted (very deep down, so deep they wouldn't admit it if you asked them) to go to bed.
Elisabeth went up to her bed and fell asleep marveling at the closeness of the ten adults downstairs.
