AN: Well, here be the angsty part. Sasuke chases after Naruto and
Jiraiya, in hopes of finding Itachi. Sasuke isn't a happy camper here.
Tori no Shi
I run, faster and faster. It's the only thing I'm capable of doing right now. My mind is a whirl of emotions and thoughts, mostly centered around one question.
Why him?
My entire life, ever since that incident, has been one goal. Become stronger. Become the best.
So that I can kill that one man.
And now, he's appeared again, right in front of me, yet...
The reason he has come back is what causes me such pain.
Why him??
If he had came back to destroy Konoha, I could accept that. I could accept it if he had came back for some world domination plan. I could even accept it if he had came back to kill me, and finish what he had started years ago.
But he had came back for a reason that was unfathomable to me.
God damn it, of all things, why Naruto??
As my attention is elsewhere, I don't notice the tree limb covered with moss, lying innocently on the ground. Were I in my right mind, or even halfway paying attention, I would never have stepped on it like I did.
But I was near crazy with the thoughts in my mind, and so slipped on it like a half-trained child. It's almost comical, the way my feet slide completely out from under me, and I land on my back forcefully, all my breath leaving in one big "whoosh".
Such a stupid mistake for one that could've been a chuunin, if not for certain unforeseeable circumstances. Such a stupid, weak, mistake.
Weak, Foolish. Idiot. All the things I called others, and yet knew they applied to myself as well.
I was weak. A certain night four years ago had proved that to me. And being paired with *him*, the one who I had thought even weaker than I, had forced me to discover even more foolish mistakes within myself.
I had allowed myself to become normal again. I had allowed someone close to me again, had let them into my heart, when I should about nothing but my goal.
And it was this caring, this feeling that I had foolishly entertained that caused me to loose my control at a misspoken sentence.
The reason I was pursuing Naruto and the sennin was not only to find Itachi, but out of some deep fear for Naruto.
I still haven't gotten up since I slipped. I'm wasting time, yet I can't force myself to move. I'm trying to hold back something, whether it's a sob or a scream I'm not sure. Something hot stings my eyes, and I am confused.
Tears? Why? Why would I be crying?
Because I'm scared.
I can't help it, the feeling wells up yet again, and I curl up into a ball, ignoring the fact that I'm getting dirty and lying in the middle of a road.
Why can't I banish these feelings? These feelings, that cause me to freeze, to do stupid things that aren't in line with my goal. Why can't I become the emotionless avenger I so wished to be?
I can't....I can't allow myself these weaknesses. Choking back any sounds that I might have made, I struggle to my hands and knees. I musn't allow myself to freeze. I musn't allow myself to feel this fear. That would make me weaker than *him*.
I rise to my feet, shaking but determined. I won't, I musn't, I can't stop now. I've been wasting time angsting in the middle of the road. Itachi is nearby. He is pursuing something I foolishly hold dear. My feelings fall into place.
It doesn't matter what reason I'm pursuing Itachi for. In fact, he has just caused himself more grief by going after Naruto. Protecting Naruto would mean fighting Itachi, my goal. My two purposes of life are in line, why am I being depressed? I must catch up with them now.
And yet, I'm still afraid.
What if I fail? What if I'm not strong enough? Will I be forced to watch everythgin precious to me be destroyed again?
NO, I can't do this to myself! Run, Sasuke, move forward. Head towards your goal. Think about why you're running when you get there.
I force my legs to propell me forward once again. I've been wasting precious time dwelling on feelings. Even if I'm afraid, I must go forward.
Always, forward, don't look back, keep my eyes only on the goal.
Will I be able to?
Trees flash by as I run full speed for the town. My goal. Don't think about anything else. Don';t think about how impossible it will be, or just why Itachi is after Naruto.
Just run for the goal...
Don't allow yourself to be left behind...
I see it then, a vision that flies through my head like the trees blur by me as I run.
Naruto, running ahead of me. Always ahead. Always faster.
Leaving me behind...
Is that how it will always be?
He grows by leaps and bounds, far faster and stronger than anyone could believe. How soon will it be until he leaves even me far behind...?
Don't think, Sasuke, just run.
Just run...
Naruto...don't leave me behind, please...
~Tsuzuku~
AN: *winces at the total suckiness that is this chapter* Ugh. That was just...ugh. So depressing. v.v;; And once again mi-chan proves that she can't write fluff worth crap, and yet ansgt flows like an unstoppable river.
Tori no Shi
I run, faster and faster. It's the only thing I'm capable of doing right now. My mind is a whirl of emotions and thoughts, mostly centered around one question.
Why him?
My entire life, ever since that incident, has been one goal. Become stronger. Become the best.
So that I can kill that one man.
And now, he's appeared again, right in front of me, yet...
The reason he has come back is what causes me such pain.
Why him??
If he had came back to destroy Konoha, I could accept that. I could accept it if he had came back for some world domination plan. I could even accept it if he had came back to kill me, and finish what he had started years ago.
But he had came back for a reason that was unfathomable to me.
God damn it, of all things, why Naruto??
As my attention is elsewhere, I don't notice the tree limb covered with moss, lying innocently on the ground. Were I in my right mind, or even halfway paying attention, I would never have stepped on it like I did.
But I was near crazy with the thoughts in my mind, and so slipped on it like a half-trained child. It's almost comical, the way my feet slide completely out from under me, and I land on my back forcefully, all my breath leaving in one big "whoosh".
Such a stupid mistake for one that could've been a chuunin, if not for certain unforeseeable circumstances. Such a stupid, weak, mistake.
Weak, Foolish. Idiot. All the things I called others, and yet knew they applied to myself as well.
I was weak. A certain night four years ago had proved that to me. And being paired with *him*, the one who I had thought even weaker than I, had forced me to discover even more foolish mistakes within myself.
I had allowed myself to become normal again. I had allowed someone close to me again, had let them into my heart, when I should about nothing but my goal.
And it was this caring, this feeling that I had foolishly entertained that caused me to loose my control at a misspoken sentence.
The reason I was pursuing Naruto and the sennin was not only to find Itachi, but out of some deep fear for Naruto.
I still haven't gotten up since I slipped. I'm wasting time, yet I can't force myself to move. I'm trying to hold back something, whether it's a sob or a scream I'm not sure. Something hot stings my eyes, and I am confused.
Tears? Why? Why would I be crying?
Because I'm scared.
I can't help it, the feeling wells up yet again, and I curl up into a ball, ignoring the fact that I'm getting dirty and lying in the middle of a road.
Why can't I banish these feelings? These feelings, that cause me to freeze, to do stupid things that aren't in line with my goal. Why can't I become the emotionless avenger I so wished to be?
I can't....I can't allow myself these weaknesses. Choking back any sounds that I might have made, I struggle to my hands and knees. I musn't allow myself to freeze. I musn't allow myself to feel this fear. That would make me weaker than *him*.
I rise to my feet, shaking but determined. I won't, I musn't, I can't stop now. I've been wasting time angsting in the middle of the road. Itachi is nearby. He is pursuing something I foolishly hold dear. My feelings fall into place.
It doesn't matter what reason I'm pursuing Itachi for. In fact, he has just caused himself more grief by going after Naruto. Protecting Naruto would mean fighting Itachi, my goal. My two purposes of life are in line, why am I being depressed? I must catch up with them now.
And yet, I'm still afraid.
What if I fail? What if I'm not strong enough? Will I be forced to watch everythgin precious to me be destroyed again?
NO, I can't do this to myself! Run, Sasuke, move forward. Head towards your goal. Think about why you're running when you get there.
I force my legs to propell me forward once again. I've been wasting precious time dwelling on feelings. Even if I'm afraid, I must go forward.
Always, forward, don't look back, keep my eyes only on the goal.
Will I be able to?
Trees flash by as I run full speed for the town. My goal. Don't think about anything else. Don';t think about how impossible it will be, or just why Itachi is after Naruto.
Just run for the goal...
Don't allow yourself to be left behind...
I see it then, a vision that flies through my head like the trees blur by me as I run.
Naruto, running ahead of me. Always ahead. Always faster.
Leaving me behind...
Is that how it will always be?
He grows by leaps and bounds, far faster and stronger than anyone could believe. How soon will it be until he leaves even me far behind...?
Don't think, Sasuke, just run.
Just run...
Naruto...don't leave me behind, please...
~Tsuzuku~
AN: *winces at the total suckiness that is this chapter* Ugh. That was just...ugh. So depressing. v.v;; And once again mi-chan proves that she can't write fluff worth crap, and yet ansgt flows like an unstoppable river.
